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Cjmckay



Registered: 04/09/18
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: mndfreeze]
#25539783 - 10/15/18 03:54 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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I used to get gaba from friends. It seemed liked everyone around here was getting prescribed them for a while. They def helped. Seems like they kinda distract you from wd symptoms. But they kinda wig me out, like too much caffeine. Then I'd feel like shit when I stopped taking them and get high. And as far as exercise, it's the last thing I'd wanna do, and I would rarely do it. But I've noticed it helped me regulate my temp. That chills nonsense would last forever and drive me nuts.
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Edited by Cjmckay (10/15/18 03:55 PM)
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mndfreeze 
Shroomery Secret Service




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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Cjmckay]
#25540952 - 10/16/18 12:56 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thats a strange reaction to gabapentin. It works on your body similar to benzos or alcohol. Generally they make people tired, or drunkish feeling in high doses. You could have just had a strange reaction to it, or the withdrawal anxiety was too intense for the dosage of gabapentin you were taking. The dose they start you at is really really weak and you have to step up huge amounts every week. I take them for neuropathic pain and at one point I was taking about 4 grams a day. I started at 900mg a day.
Exercise usually helps when you have bad anxiety. During the initial heavy withdrawals I wouldn't expect it to help much, other than if you're feeling endless anxious energy then sometimes a run will help, even if you feel like shit.
In the later stages when you struggle to sleep but are past the primary physical stuff exercise can really help start to get your body producing endorphins again. Helps with depression and anxiety too.
-------------------- Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus! quote]Urb said: I know... Its fucked up... Ill fix it minyana..[/quote]
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Cjmckay



Registered: 04/09/18
Posts: 387
Last seen: 6 months, 6 days
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: mndfreeze]
#25541263 - 10/16/18 07:15 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Weird I never did get a calming effect. Jittery mostly. I never did keep track of the amount of gaba I was taking, though. Maybe too much. Yeah my anxiety was through the roof. That's why I started getting high in the first place. Meditation was a godsend. You're right about during the heavy WD's. I don't think anything will help but meds. For me the wd's would seem to last forever until I gave in. After not sleeping for a month I would say fuck it, no way. But a little bupe or methadone will wipe them out pretty well. Still after a few days and feeling better, I'd be right back in the game. Relentless cycle.
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fuckthenorm
Primate


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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Cjmckay]
#25541519 - 10/16/18 09:46 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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hey guys how are you all doing? i have 8 months clean off heroin as of 2 days ago.its gotten so much easier. once i got past the 4 month marker its been cake staying clean. i am completely clean dont use anything. thinking about using mushrooms again though during the next summer solstice or sooner
-------------------- [gradient:#C9D4C7,#][/gradient]princess and the frog- they finally made a disney movie for the blacks
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mndfreeze 
Shroomery Secret Service




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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: fuckthenorm]
#25542368 - 10/16/18 03:13 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Cjmckay said: Weird I never did get a calming effect. Jittery mostly. I never did keep track of the amount of gaba I was taking, though. Maybe too much. Yeah my anxiety was through the roof. That's why I started getting high in the first place. Meditation was a godsend. You're right about during the heavy WD's. I don't think anything will help but meds. For me the wd's would seem to last forever until I gave in. After not sleeping for a month I would say fuck it, no way. But a little bupe or methadone will wipe them out pretty well. Still after a few days and feeling better, I'd be right back in the game. Relentless cycle.
Does alcohol makes you hyper and such? There are always people who are one off's and react weird to shit. I have all sorts of drugs on my list that act whack as fuck for me compared to others. That's probably what it is. Once you get into the brain chemistry of things we have a lot of unknowns on the science side so perhaps that specific gaba receptor for you is wired whacky or something.
I'm roughly about 5 years clean from heroin but I got into a methadone program because I have too many nerve issues on top and always struggled too much in the long term withdrawal stage. Anxiety, sleeplessness on top of my nerves going from normal to a million needles of electric fire would always make me seek out something to cope, which 99% of the time was opiates again. Tack on depression and shit too and it was too much. When I made the decision it was time for the self destructive behavior to stop and put myself into a clinic I went in with the mentality that even if I need to be on methadone for the rest of my life, it was better than how things were on heroin. I started to see after being on that program for a while that recovery is a huge, many step, long process but it works for those who want it to work. I tried and failed more times than I can count to do it the hard way.
Quote:
fuckthenorm said: hey guys how are you all doing? i have 8 months clean off heroin as of 2 days ago.its gotten so much easier. once i got past the 4 month marker its been cake staying clean. i am completely clean don't use anything. thinking about using mushrooms again though during the next summer solstice or sooner
Conrgats man! keep it up! I would be wary of using anything if you have addictive behaviors in general, because once you start to justify things being OK in your head is how you start to fall back down that slippery slope. It might not lead back into heroin, but it can lead into other self harming behaviors. I don't see a problem with tripping specifically, just make sure you are careful that if you enjoy it and have fun that you don't start telling yourself "well, its safe and non-addictive so now I can do it X days a month.. then X days a week" etc.
<3
-------------------- Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus! quote]Urb said: I know... Its fucked up... Ill fix it minyana..[/quote]
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trvptamine
P-Mx$$



Registered: 07/06/15
Posts: 4,859
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Connoisseur]
#25542385 - 10/16/18 03:21 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Im sober-ish rn. A few weeks ago I got high all weekend for my bday.
Besides that ive been taking kratom 3 or 4 days in a row every two weeks or so. Phenibut in between. And my gabapentin.
I dont think I could be sober if I was in the city with my friends still. I think about that shit all the time.
Withdrawal free though. And Ive been taking mirtazipine for restless legs and sleep lately. It helps a ton. I havent taken any kratom since I got mirtazipine, but I think its gonna help a ton on the day after my half-week kratom binges.
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Edited by trvptamine (10/16/18 03:21 PM)
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feevers



Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 8,546
Loc:
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: trvptamine] 3
#25542634 - 10/16/18 04:57 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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good friend OD'ed and died over the weekend.
it was his third OD. When I met him he hadn't fallen out at all yet, and I'd OD'd twice at that point. He always joked that he was going to beat my "record", even after he got closer and closer. I remember after the first one him coming into work pale as a ghost with sternum bruises and saying "one down. I'm catching up", how freaked out he looked but still trying to make light of it.
doesn't feel real that he's actually gone. makes me feel like I should've tried to put him in check more instead of joking back and forth with him about the shit, but nothing could get through to him no matter how hard I tried. He knew to come to me if he was ever serious about getting into recovery, but he also kept his distance a bit because he thought he could drag me down with him, which may have had some truth to it. He was never really a daily user, and was so off again on again with it that it was hard for anyone around him to really intervene. he loved everyone around him and was one of the most kind-hearted people I've known, but he was self destructive to himself more than anything I've ever seen. It never made sense to me, everyone that met him loved him.
I'm 6-ish years sober now. Had 4-5 relapses in my first two years, nothing other than some relatively mild alcohol struggles since then. My mind state now doesn't even resemble who I was back then. Hard work played a large role in the recovery, but time and luck were probably the main things that got me here.
RIP to everyone who hasn't been so lucky, and good luck to those still struggling. If you can just string some time together, you'll be amazed at how big the world becomes and how many opportunities you can create for yourself. I went from being 107lbs, homeless and basically lifeless for 4 years to being a certified addiction counselor with a bachelor's in neuroscience and currently about to start a master's degree in rehab therapy. when I was using, I would've laughed if someone told me I'd ever even figure out how to apply for a college, or have even the slightest desire to do so.
the finality of death.... caused by something as short-lived and shitty as a fentanyl high... it's just surreal. someone so full of life simply no longer "is" anything at all. one night he was on the phone joking with his daughter before she went to sleep, the next he was cold and dead in a locker. the fact that I was only seconds away from the same fate twice, and only milligrams of powder away from it countless times, sends chills down my spine and make me wonder what the fuck life actually is. rest in peace shane, it'd be impossible to ever forget you
Edited by feevers (11/30/20 08:25 PM)
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Cjmckay



Registered: 04/09/18
Posts: 387
Last seen: 6 months, 6 days
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: trvptamine] 1
#25542635 - 10/16/18 04:57 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Mndfreeze- you still on methadone? I've about a year of only bupe. I'm thinking about trying to wind down off it. Not looking forward to dealing with it.
Feevers- sorry to hear. I know exactly. Going out like that is really sad.
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Edited by Cjmckay (10/16/18 05:03 PM)
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feevers



Registered: 12/28/10
Posts: 8,546
Loc:
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Cjmckay]
#25543053 - 10/16/18 07:43 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Cjmckay said: Mndfreeze- you still on methadone? I've about a year of only bupe. I'm thinking about trying to wind down off it. Not looking forward to dealing with it.
Feevers- sorry to hear. I know exactly. Going out like that is really sad.
Thanks man.
I know you were asking mdndfreeze, but I was on suboxone for 4 months and quit cold turkey. It was hell, but I made it through even with a full script on my desk.
Tapering is a must. I know people who've gone all the way down to basically a crumb per day before jumping off. I'd do the same if I did it over.
If you can, plan your jump-off time before you get some time off from work. Nothing helps a dope withdrawal but dope, but you can find some stuff to take the edge off slightly.
I used magnesium, potassium, multivitamins, ashwaghanda, lemon balm, passion flower, heating pad, and a whole bunch of hot baths and showers. When the physical stuff wasn't too bad, going out and driving aimlessly was a God send for some reason, took my mind off everything for a little while. OTC sleeping pills might work, but you're in for one hell of a bad time if you haven't eaten for a few days and you take a large dose that doesn't work. Microwavable cups of soup I could drink were great when I could actually choke something down.
A year isn't all that long. Quitting now will be easier then quitting later, with a proper taper you should be able to minimise the negatives. I'd only get off it if you're totally comfortable you've got dope out of your life though, otherwise I'd keep working at that.
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Cjmckay



Registered: 04/09/18
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: feevers]
#25543124 - 10/16/18 08:17 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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The dope is pretty far behind. I don't even like the cloudiness from alcohol anymore. But I know how the brain reacts when it doesn't have something it's used to. I've made some big mental strides. Meditation got my anxiety, racing mind insanity down to where I feel better than any point in my life at 45. The tapering part is where I screw up. I get down to small pieces then start taking them throughout the day. Kinda like popping pills for a mental and physical pick me up and keeping the stress away. I just wanna get them away from me.
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relic
of a bygone era


Registered: 10/14/14
Posts: 5,623
Loc: the right coast
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Cjmckay]
#25544420 - 10/17/18 11:36 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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the way i did my sub taper was to lower my dose slightly, stabilize on that lowered dose for about four or five days or so (due to the long half life) and then lower slightly again. i found this by trial and error as i'm often wont to do rather than talking to pro's, users or the official Dr. type pros. i don't know if this type of taper dose + stabilize dose + taper dose regimen is common or not.
by doing that, i went from a stable dose of 8mg per day to .0625 mg per day, then made the jump from there. protip: a razor knife, drafting ruler, and desktop magnifying glass--the kind you don't need to hold but has a stand of its own--is crucial to cutting a strip into 32 perfectly even pieces. all in all it took a little while and sometimes when i lowered the dose it only took 3 days to stabilize, but that's what worked for me. i had very minimal physical blowback tapering this way and the physical part is my biggest trigger to using. yeah, i've done CT and rapid tapers and all that, but by having extremely minimal physical ramifications i was able to concentrate on the overall physical & mental wellness plans i was also implementing.
YMMV and best wishes for you and everyone else out there making changes. be well, y'all.
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Cjmckay



Registered: 04/09/18
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: relic]
#25545247 - 10/17/18 05:12 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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That's the route I'll be taking then. I got down to 1mg a day then I got some wisdom teeth removed and I started taking it multiple times a day as the pain lasted about a month. Bad habit and it didn't help the pain. Funny how all the sub Drs I've been to have no idea about tapering. They assume you just stop taking your 8mg a day when you're ready and all is well. I just gotta get back on a steady once a day dose.
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Mush 4 Brains
about tree fiddy


Registered: 12/19/07
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Cjmckay]
#25561540 - 10/23/18 08:45 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Don't know why but subs have never done a fucking thing for me. Of the dozens of times I've tried them, strips/pills, high and low doses. Yes I took them correctly and no they never so much as took the edge off.
Methadone on the other hand made me feel normal. Slight adjustment period with the sweats and all, but that went away after a couple of weeks.
Heard a member here passed away from an od, modest mouse. Rip
Often times I think death is better
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mndfreeze 
Shroomery Secret Service




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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Mush 4 Brains] 1
#25562041 - 10/24/18 12:08 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Death is never better. People often forget that even though its a quick exit for them, the damage and pain it leaves behind ripples out through everyone you know and will stick with them for a life time.
-------------------- Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus! quote]Urb said: I know... Its fucked up... Ill fix it minyana..[/quote]
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Dr. Siekadellyk
Look at the corruption!




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Posts: 2,580
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: mndfreeze] 1
#25563334 - 10/24/18 12:49 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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I've got 4+ months clean.
-------------------- -My ISO list- -My trade list-
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trvptamine
P-Mx$$



Registered: 07/06/15
Posts: 4,859
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Thats awesome!
Ive been hella sad today cause one of my best friends got locked up for selling H. His parents got locked up with him too. Hes got a baby on the way and he cant afford to be locked up right now.
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Doc9151
Mycologist



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Loc: Gulf Coast USA
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Mush 4 Brains] 1
#25563831 - 10/24/18 03:29 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mush 4 Brains said: 17 days clean, almost feeling human.
I hope you are still hanging in there, if so, when the urge to use comes back and it will, remember what you went through to get clean, call someone, do anything other than use.
I have hope for you, personally I feel forever trapped in my addiction, dope sickness isn't the only thing that keeps me using, severe pain is an every day fact of life for me and nothing can be done for me but dope. My doc told me that there is a bill in the house of representatives that will limit opioid use to terminally ill patients only, if that happens I feel my only option is a bullet.
Living with a real medical condition and acquiring an opiate addiction from it is like living in a nightmare. There was a time I could get more meds than I really needed, now I've learned to live with taking enough medication to make the pain tolerable instead of chasing the nod.
The problem now is that the doctors in my area have been forced to cut back on prescribing,so, instead of getting just enough to get by, now I get just enough to keep me from being dope sick and get no pain relief, if I do get relief it's not noticeable most of the time.
Just think about my situation and think about recreational use. What are you going to do if you end up in my shoes and you have a huge habit already? People commit suicide over shit like this and it's a real problem. There may come a day when you really need it.
I'm praying for all of you suffering in and out of active addiction, I know what you are going through, I feel your struggle 1st hand, the only advice that I can give you about getting clean is this; If you are on a short acting opiate like heroin, lortab, percocet etc. Suck it up and be sick 10-20 days and be done with it, but if you fuck up and go to the methadone clinic, you will start a whole new nightmare.
I've been on methadone for about 18-20 years, managed to quit with subutex for 2 years once, it took 6 months before I could sleep more than 2 hours a night. The subutex helped a lot but then it was just another habit that you will have to eventually detox from if you want to be clean. My pain level during this 2 year period was unbearable, I began to have suicidal thoughts daily and decided it was dope or a bullet. Since I couldn't do that to my young children I chose dope again. Now, laws have changed, my legal fix is about to be taken away and I fear the pain, I know what comes next if I can't get relief and my children are now grown. If you have ever experienced severe pain that never stops, you know what I'm talking about.
If you just can't get clean and need help, the Methadone clinic is a great option, but if you are on short acting opiates and you have no health concerns, stay away from the long acting opiates or you may never get away. Best wishes to everyone.
Doc
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Mush 4 Brains
about tree fiddy


Registered: 12/19/07
Posts: 8,298
Loc: Tacos
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Doc9151]
#25564361 - 10/24/18 06:20 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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I have a med condition that requires me to iv infuse medication, it's a special kind of hell. I have chronic pain, nasty arthritis in both ankles and other issues.
Honestly gonna try the methadone route, I think mndfreeze and you are on to something. I did relapse and felt awful for it.
tell you the truth I have no idea how I'm still alive after all I've been through
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Doc9151
Mycologist



Registered: 02/23/17
Posts: 13,753
Loc: Gulf Coast USA
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Mush 4 Brains]
#25564633 - 10/24/18 08:28 PM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mush 4 Brains said: I have a med condition that requires me to iv infuse medication, it's a special kind of hell. I have chronic pain, nasty arthritis in both ankles and other issues.
Honestly gonna try the methadone route, I think mndfreeze and you are on to something. I did relapse and felt awful for it.
tell you the truth I have no idea how I'm still alive after all I've been through
If you do go to methadone, keep it to a minimum, don't try to get high from it, methadone clinics have more freedom to prescribe but chronic pain doctors can't prescribe the same amount. I am stuck at 80mg a day with chronic pain doctors, but I'm not tired to a clinic every day I can get more than a weeks take out, but the downside is that you will hit the max dose with pain doctors it will never be increased past it, then you're in pain but not dope sick.
Another thing to consider once you are on methadone, other narcotics will not work for you until you detox for a week.
Mindfreeze is absolutely right, that's why I didn't do it years ago, it would be easier now because my children are grown and they know how I suffer severely at times with meds. we have talked about this recently. I needed them to understand why I would do it, it still would be hard for them but at least they are old enough to understand why.
--------------------
  Psilocybe cubensis data collection thread. please help with this project if you hunt wild cubensis. https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php?Cat=0&Number=26513593&page=0&vc=1#26513593
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mndfreeze 
Shroomery Secret Service




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Re: Opiate addicts support group (moved) [Re: Doc9151]
#25565293 - 10/25/18 02:58 AM (5 years, 3 months ago) |
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Methadone clinics work if you really want it too. You need to plan your recovery to take a long time and not rush it. The people who succeed the most with clinic settings are the ones who dont put a timeline on conplete opiate cessation and do a gradual step down process. I maxed out on my methadone dose fairly quick because they let you so you can match your habit and that definitely made it take exponentially longer to taper off of but had I not done that i may have relapsed chasing relief that was more in my head than my body.
Therapy/counseling is also important. Definitely do not discount the success rates of a clinic if you are really ready for a change.
-------------------- Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus! quote]Urb said: I know... Its fucked up... Ill fix it minyana..[/quote]
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