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Connoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: T-Rex]
#23620809 - 09/07/16 05:43 AM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
T-Rex said: I'm now 2 months clean from suboxone and 8 months clean of heroin. Life feels great. i enjoy more things. Still not out of the lingering depression and lethargy but its a pleasure not to wake up chasing something in order to function. I've had longer clean time in the past but I can say this time around I see success. I completely eliminated all my friendships outside of work and have lost any connection for heroin or opiates. Getting clean from opiates starts from within. If you are determined to get off opiates you can. All willpower. I believe in everyone of you.
Right on man!

Keep it up!
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T-Rex




Registered: 04/05/08
Posts: 4,185
Loc: NY
Last seen: 8 days, 7 hours
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: Connoisseur]
#23622776 - 09/07/16 05:16 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Hey Conn. I've been away on business. When I'm home Friday I'll message you.
Edited by T-Rex (09/07/16 05:25 PM)
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Connoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: T-Rex]
#23622909 - 09/07/16 05:41 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Right on brother!
Hope all is well with you!
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: Connoisseur]
#23626246 - 09/08/16 03:43 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Money is stacking up so quick. I could buy a couple grams of coke n dope and still have money left over, but I think I'll keep it going and pay down all my cash advance debt. I have alot of weak moments, but luckily it's always after dudes close for the day. I have been working 7am-5pm then just drinking all night, which has really gotta stop before I develop another dependence. It's hard tho.
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egodeathflux
Guttersnipe



Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 3,854
Loc: The Stygian Pits
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Booze is a walk in the park compared to opiates IME, I used to be a LUSH for about a decade, somehow avoided damage or any physical WD's, doctors said I was some kind of freak medical anomaly based on the amount of units I was drinking, how often and how I drinking and what I was imbibing.
Was doing at least a 5th and 2-3 litres 8% cider per day for years and years, too many arrests, fucked up relationships etc and I just quit cold turkey with Disulfiram(sp?/Antabuse in late 2009, went about 6 months totally dry and haven't been what I would call drunk since..
By drunk I mean anything I can feel the next morning or any amount that would lead me to make phone calls/texts etc that I wouldn't do sober.
No idea how I stuck to it so easy, my best friend died about2 weeks after I started having the occasional drink again in 2010. Didn't even get drunk at the funeral/wake, and we were life long drug/booze buddies. I just know when to stop, I would trade any booze addiction for my opiate addiction any day of the week.
Not saying don't be careful, but I think in the short-medium term booze is more benign that opi's, within reason, ya can still drink yerself to death in a few hours of course. Jusr keep on top of it and try and have at least 2 days a week off, you should be fine unless it becomes something ya need to get outta bed in the morning.
I used to wake up to a half pint of room temp gin/vodka every day about 7am and start "drinking" from there after I smoked an 1/8th of bud to get my head on my shoulders to make it to the liquor store.. Dark times, but damn we had some fun, shit is easier in your 20's though, bounce back a lot faster and with a lot less pain etc..
You will be I am sure of it.
-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: egodeathflux]
#23626532 - 09/08/16 05:28 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah I keep it at 1 pint of whiskey and 1 24 oz beer per night, but that is like 10 drinks supposedly. I've never felt any sort of alcohol dependence, and I hardly even get hung over unless I have 15 or 20 drink in a couple hours.
It definitely effects my judgement tho. Mostly every relapse I have had is due to alcohol. Shit makes me want to get high all the more. It's bad.
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egodeathflux
Guttersnipe



Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 3,854
Loc: The Stygian Pits
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Yeah that is what I am talking about in terms of my "limits" with booze the last 6 years, I know if I get past a certain point the credit card comes out and the it is Crack City Rockers, dope and Lord knows what... Usually ending up in a police cell on suspected mental health charges due to past record of mental health arrests (AKA being fucked on psychs, coke/crack and about 10 other things) and playing the mental health card to avoid charges...
So easy to lie to those idiot cops/doctors/psych docs etc.. "Do you want to kill yourself??" .... Hmmmm... "No, I just want to go home and get some sleep and something to eat, I was having a panic attack".
Only works if ya have long record of actual anxiety issues, depressive episodes involving law enforcement etc..
-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: egodeathflux]
#23626614 - 09/08/16 05:56 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah I was just so close to calling my dude and offering to spend many hundreds of dollars, which I suspect would get him to extend his hours. It's totally fucked tho I don't even really want it, I'm just drunk and impulsive. Luckily I don't feel like this when I get out of work.
Sometimes I think I should just get coke, but that is also just asking for a relapse. Gotta just stick with it. I'm doing good I think. All I have to do is not call some asshole who is probably going to make me wait too long for something I don't need. Should be easy.
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egodeathflux
Guttersnipe



Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 3,854
Loc: The Stygian Pits
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Yes man, jut think of how many weeks/months you have spent waiting for these assholes oover the years to get fix and spend money ya don't have on something ya wouldn't need or want if ya could just break free for a few weeks and gain some clarity.
Not preaching at all. I am in no position to talk, I just think you and a couple of peeps on here at the moment have made it to a place I wish I was at and I would hate to see you waste the work you have put in to fulfill a trip down an empty road tha leads to a town called Nowhere we have all lived in for a lot of years..

-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: egodeathflux]
#23626761 - 09/08/16 06:40 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah the actual high is bullshit. It is not what I want out of life or why I started taking drugs.
I have hung onto $300 cash for a week now. All my pants have holes in them and I need tools for work, but I just can't buy sensible things without feeling like I will regret it later. I spent $70 on groceries this week, which felt good to buy things that I actually want, but I also couldn't help feeling that I was fucking myself over.
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egodeathflux
Guttersnipe



Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 3,854
Loc: The Stygian Pits
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Quote:
moonrockmushy said: Yeah the actual high is bullshit. It is not what I want out of life or why I started taking drugs.
I have hung onto $300 cash for a week now. All my pants have holes in them and I need tools for work, but I just can't buy sensible things without feeling like I will regret it later. I spent $70 on groceries this week, which felt good to buy things that I actually want, but I also couldn't help feeling that I was fucking myself over.
That is a head space you are only gonna get out of by repitition I think, spending money on food, clothes, bills etc should not seem like a waste, but I know EXACTLY how you feel.
Your brain is wired to want one thing, you just need to tell your brain to fuck off until you are back in control of decisions, could take years, but the sooner you start, the sooner your neural pathways will begin to make new connections and ideas that seem foolish now will slowly begin to make sense and become the norm.
Did you see the nutrition based detox/rehab stuff I posted recently? All that is directly geared toward rewiring the brain and the decision making/reward process.
Let me know if ya want me to link it or send ya a pdf etc to your 
-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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AVShroomer
LSD enthusiast



Registered: 05/19/03
Posts: 832
Last seen: 7 months, 8 days
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: egodeathflux]
#23627382 - 09/08/16 09:56 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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It really does feel good to now be able to save some money or even just go out and buy cool things that you would never have gotten while using dope. Now that I have been clean I have so much stuff I am proud of. I was the same way when I first got clean I felt like I was screwing my self over when I would go out to the mall or the grocery store. I felt like if I spent that money on stuff other than heroin I would have a bad day and not have money to cop. That feeling goes away trust me and than sooner or later now when I look back I realize I was just making reservations to get high. It takes alot of fully let go of opiates and the lifestyle Im still struggling it will always be a battle for me to an extent. Today I saw on the news about half my dope dealers got busted in my city I guess they have been under investigation for the past year. It will be a year in Nov since I got clean so I got out of dealing with them just in time. Im lucky cause I could have easily gotten busted one of the times Id go out daily. Heres the link to the article crazy shit! Even tho they are gone I still know more I could go to but I feel all of their days are numbered and eventually if I keep up being clean I wont have any connects anymore. http://www.mlive.com/news/bay-city/index.ssf/2016/09/men_charged_with_being_main_su.html
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'It's not a war on drugs its a war on personal freedom' >**My Trip Journal**<
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egodeathflux
Guttersnipe



Registered: 02/02/10
Posts: 3,854
Loc: The Stygian Pits
Last seen: 1 year, 2 months
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: AVShroomer]
#23628426 - 09/09/16 09:01 AM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
AVShroomer said: It really does feel good to now be able to save some money or even just go out and buy cool things that you would never have gotten while using dope. Now that I have been clean I have so much stuff I am proud of. I was the same way when I first got clean I felt like I was screwing my self over when I would go out to the mall or the grocery store. I felt like if I spent that money on stuff other than heroin I would have a bad day and not have money to cop. That feeling goes away trust me and than sooner or later now when I look back I realize I was just making reservations to get high. It takes alot of fully let go of opiates and the lifestyle Im still struggling it will always be a battle for me to an extent. Today I saw on the news about half my dope dealers got busted in my city I guess they have been under investigation for the past year. It will be a year in Nov since I got clean so I got out of dealing with them just in time. Im lucky cause I could have easily gotten busted one of the times Id go out daily. Heres the link to the article crazy shit! Even tho they are gone I still know more I could go to but I feel all of their days are numbered and eventually if I keep up being clean I wont have any connects anymore. http://www.mlive.com/news/bay-city/index.ssf/2016/09/men_charged_with_being_main_su.html
Jesus, man they paid $1200 for a 1/4 oz??????? I pay about 160-170ish USD for an 8 ball... Maybe that stuff is mad fire dope, but holy shit that seems like a lot, maybe they knew he was a pig and thought "fuck it, they got us, let's make our $$$ if we are going down!!" lol.
Good for you AV, sounds like ya got out at the right time, I love how they think that arresting a handful of guys will have ANY impact for more than a couple of days. Also lulz at the Pratt family, they obviously all stuck to the family business, poor guys thogh. Tbh they all REALLY look like heroin dealers, haha. (no racism, just that dead -eyed look if ya know what I mean).
-------------------- "Atrophic interludes weave through my life far too often, for me to fight the biggest enemies" "Standing on the corner of 5th and Vermouth"
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: egodeathflux]
#23629161 - 09/09/16 02:05 PM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Genuine thanks to both of you for the responses. It's nice to know I'm not alone. I did see your list of good foods egodeath, which I bought some. That was actually what I spent the $70 on which made me feel like I was shooting myself in the foot, but I spose that's better than shooting myself in the arm 
I bought some good tequila for the weekend. I wasn't even thinking about dope all day, just having a drink. Monday will be three weeks. Now I just gotta get off the kratom, but that should be managable especially if I taper down. Maybe it is for the best that it is being made illegal in my case, since I will be forced off it at some point.
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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4 weeks, no opiates. It's funny being more self-conscious than I have in so long, but also doing so much better. It's such an odd impulse, but I'm doing better and better.
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Connoisseur

Registered: 05/13/11
Posts: 34,686
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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daz01
Learning


Registered: 09/30/10
Posts: 4,652
Loc: Scotland
Last seen: 1 day, 1 hour
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-------------------- Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute or an hour or a day or even a year but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it will last forever.
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AVShroomer
LSD enthusiast



Registered: 05/19/03
Posts: 832
Last seen: 7 months, 8 days
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Quote:
moonrockmushy said: 4 weeks, no opiates. It's funny being more self-conscious than I have in so long, but also doing so much better. It's such an odd impulse, but I'm doing better and better.
Grats my friend! Things will slowly but surely start to turn around for you as long as you keep away from the dope. It takes time thats the part I had trouble with I never was good at waiting for things in my life to get better before I knew it I was back using. Now that in a month and a half or so it will be a year I can finally see good things comming my way. Still have alot of work to do but its starting to happen..
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'It's not a war on drugs its a war on personal freedom' >**My Trip Journal**<
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Opiate addicts support group [Re: AVShroomer]
#23660656 - 09/20/16 04:05 AM (7 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yeah it's so nice feeling ok in the morning, and get through a day of work without making excuses to dip out or try to work sick which makes for the longest days imaginable.
I made it a month and a half around new years. Actually my second longest clean time since like 2005. I told myself though, I just want to shoot something, I'm going to get some coke. You wouldn't think it but that was actually not a good idea here I am nine months later still trying to get back to that point.
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AVShroomer
LSD enthusiast



Registered: 05/19/03
Posts: 832
Last seen: 7 months, 8 days
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Quote:
moonrockmushy said: Yeah it's so nice feeling ok in the morning, and get through a day of work without making excuses to dip out or try to work sick which makes for the longest days imaginable.
I made it a month and a half around new years. Actually my second longest clean time since like 2005. I told myself though, I just want to shoot something, I'm going to get some coke. You wouldn't think it but that was actually not a good idea here I am nine months later still trying to get back to that point.
I totally agree! I sure don't miss waking up every morning sick as a dog rushing around to make the 20 min drive I had to make to the dopeman every morning. It would especially be bad waking up not having any money having to figure out what to do to get enough loot to atleast get right trying to shoot my old cottons. Nasty ass shit thats forsure. I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.
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'It's not a war on drugs its a war on personal freedom' >**My Trip Journal**<
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