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Amazon Shop for: Terrence McKenna

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Offlineoggleman
Stranger
Male
Registered: 01/21/04
Posts: 281
Loc: Chicago
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
unemployment --> depression... trapped:(
    #2271720 - 01/25/04 03:34 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

So here's the thing, I graduated from college last May and have been looking for work ever since. While I have gotten a few jobs I've lost them all. No big loss really, they all sucked big time, and most of the time I've quit because I was about to lose them (either cursing my manager in front of the customers, or it being a sales type position and me being the shitty salesman I am was unable to make my quota).

So here is the problem now, it's been over two months now since I've been "on the clock". I have a roommate who works all the time, he has livelyhood, his life has meaning and purpose, because he is doing something constructive with it. He is meeting new people all the time. Me on the other hand, I'm losing touch with my friends because I can't afford to go out with them. My days are monotonous and uneventful. I don't get out much. I don't eat right because I can't afford to do so. I'm malnourished, underweight, and hungry almost all the time. And lets not talk about girls, my love life as of late can only be described by 3 words... "the lack thereof"

So now, just try and imagine the laughable and hardly possible situation where someone could be in my situation and maintain the confidence and motivation to conduct the relentless type of job search necessary to land a job when the job market is as bad as it is these days. Heh, not to mention landing a GOOD job;) It even got to the point where I put in an application at McDonalds because I saw they were hiring for a number of positions, but still, no callback. Do I have to follow up with a phone call and whore myself out to even the most menial of positions? Yes I have resumes and I have submitted them to potential employers for decent jobs, just so you know that I haven't ONLY been looking for shitty jobs.

O yeah, heres another thing (we'll call my roommate T). ::phone rings:: "hello"... "T its for you", or "T is not home right now", or "No I'm not interested in how much money you can save me on my long distance bill" or "Sorry you have the wrong number" You get the idea, I'm sooo sick of answering the phone and everyone wanting to talk to T. It would take a fool to think that this would not have an effect on my livelihood and confidence.

So I think I've sufficiently expressed my situation here. I'm depressed because I've been unemployed so long, and its hard to get a job (especially these days) when you are depressed. How do I pull myself out of this vicious cycle?? I am DYING to get back to work and feel like I'm a contributing member of society. And I know that all it would take is a job, any job, and my confidence would go up, my energy would go up, etc etc. Furthermore, the better the job, the more pronounced these beneficial effects would be. Its to the point now where I'm on the verge of having to move back in with my mom due to lack of funds:( Well thanks in advance to all who may have some advice for me...sigh


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Edited by oggleman (01/25/04 03:44 PM)


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OfflineSlapnutRob
Toolhead

Registered: 03/31/03
Posts: 520
Loc: Michigan
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2272306 - 01/25/04 07:20 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

God damn jobless recovery. I just got a job a couple months ago but it took me 4 months of unemployment to get it. All I can say is apply EVERYWHERE and try monster.com.


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Anything stated above is fictional roleplay dialog by the character that is Slapnut Rob, in no way representing the actions or beliefs of the man behind the keys.


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Offlineshroom_muncher
ex-dope fiend

Registered: 10/07/03
Posts: 426
Loc: The great white north
Last seen: 10 years, 1 month
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: SlapnutRob]
    #2272960 - 01/25/04 11:42 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Don't worry about it. A job doesn't make the man. Just invest some money into mushrooms and sell those off to get some extra flow. Meanwhile find a job you actually like and could see yourself doing for a long time and pursue it.


--------------------
peace sells but whos buyin?


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Invisibletimetravel
I'm going toMars!

Registered: 12/08/03
Posts: 163
Loc: Holland
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2273266 - 01/26/04 01:20 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I hope you get a job soon. Maybe moving back home with mom would be a good idea. Moms hate seeing their kids suffer on the couch watching tv all day and night, waking up a 11am, and taking 2 hour showers. She would have 4 jobs lined up for ya in 2 weeks. Peace


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Everything in this post happened 7 years ago. If you do not feel good get a hobby like r/c airplane flying.


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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 5 years, 11 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2273675 - 01/26/04 05:12 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

You are turning yourself into a loser by thinking this way.

This isn't a good idea.

You are fuckin cool..... "sell yourself" at the job interviews - you can do it.

There's nothing wrong with you right now lol you're just "in between jobs" - relax and keep the search going - keep the search going - keep looking - don't stop - don't get lazy - keep the search going and you'll find a new job.

It sounds to me like your bigger problem is that you think the job brings confidence when its actually you who brings confidence to yourself. Figure out what it is about having a job that makes you feel better and, while you're searching for your new job, obtain this feeling through other means like helping your family with various things and doing odd-jobs for neighborhood people


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE


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Invisibledownforpot
Stranger
Male
Registered: 06/25/01
Posts: 5,715
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2273936 - 01/26/04 07:52 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I applied at a few places and tried to work at USP but everything is full. My dad got me a job washing trucks at his company, awesome. You can always wash dishes at a restaraunts, it might be shitty work but it pays.


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http://www.myspace.com/4th25


"And I don't care if he was handcuffed
Then shot in his head
All I know is dead bodies
Can't fuck with me again"


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InvisibleYesItsMe
Homeless GOHOME !...

Registered: 10/29/03
Posts: 253
Loc: Working for Piss ;...
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274029 - 01/26/04 09:33 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I was like u , then i fund a working girlfriend thinking she'll push me in the right way .

Now we're two unemployed , smoking weed everyday and drinking all the time      :shiftyeyes:


--------------------
God save the Queen


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OfflinePhluck
Carpal Tunnel
 User Gallery

Registered: 04/11/99
Posts: 11,393
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 1 year, 3 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274161 - 01/26/04 10:59 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

"It even got to the point where I put in an application at McDonalds because I saw they were hiring for a number of positions, but still, no callback. Do I have to follow up with a phone call and whore myself out to even the most menial of positions?"

YES!

It really sucks, but it's the only option. Handing a single resume into a McDonald's gives you about a 10% chance of a callback. Go to every fast food place in your area and fill out an application and drop off a resume. You could do 10 in a day easily, and you'll almost be guaranteed a call back. Then go in a few days after and follow up. Fast food jobs suck, but they are still going to hire the most persistant and promising people.

Job hunting sucks, but the only way you'll succeed is if you approach it as if it were a job.


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"I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
http://phluck.is-after.us


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OfflineTwista
Fire it up
Male

Registered: 04/05/02
Posts: 554
Loc: Central Florida
Last seen: 13 days, 10 hours
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: Phluck]
    #2274199 - 01/26/04 11:17 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I think the real problem is that you see roommate T and you see that he has something you want and its not a job- it's happiness.

You've had jobs and you're still strugling b/c you're not happy. Find happiness and you'll find stability.

I understand that is easier said than done esp if there isnt much of a job market where you are.

Are you technically savy? Maybe you consider opening up an online business?

Also, in your downtime without a job, grab a book and broaden your marketable skills. This will give you self worth and get you away from feeling trapped. You can get out from being trapped. How bad do you want it? it's up to you.

best wishes.

-t-


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Offlineoggleman
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Male
Registered: 01/21/04
Posts: 281
Loc: Chicago
Last seen: 11 years, 2 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274736 - 01/26/04 03:11 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Haha thanks for the advice yall. And yes moving in with my mom may not be such a bad idea, she's a great cook, I would THOROUGHLY enjoy having a full meal to eat every day. I've been living a fool's paradise lately. My mom agreed to help me out financially for a little while while I got on me feet, well this has been going on way too long and I'm still not on my feet. Its my conscience is starting to get in the way of me asking her for money all the time. I've also been smoking cigs that aren't mine, and weed thats not mine, as part of the illusion of a standard of living that I'm trying to live.

And oh yeah, another little detail, I'm sure some of you are aware of Everquest, I played that game 10+ hours daily for about 4 months straight, I didn't really want a job, all I wanted to do was play EQ. I lost jobs because of that game, showing up 2 hours late on 2 hours of sleep cause I played EQ until 5am the night before. Fortunately, that ended mid December when I examined where the game left me in my life and how much it fucked up my priorities, so I haven't played it since:) It was a lot of fun, but the game, especially at higher levels, has no room for the casual player, its a full time job, if you know the game I'm sure you know what I mean. So I had to make a choice, keep playing full time or quit. I chose the latter and my EQ habit ended as quickly as it started.

But anyways, I'm not completely void of confidence. When I think about it I know that I am intelligent, quick learning, I like to work hard, etc, all the things that employers want. The most self destructive attitude I've had lately is this kind of mantra that has been going through my head: "No matter what you apply for, there is always going to be someone more qualified than you". This leads easily into "why bother?"

In addition to all this, and this isn't easy for me to discuss in a public forum, the latter part of my college career I was using a lot of drugs, ALOT of ecstacy and a lot of coke, although not as much. Here's some free advice, STAY AWAY FROM THESE DRUGS. They fucked me up. Stick to weed and psychedelics, and avoid abuse of any substance, keeping in mind that any substance can be abused. In my experience, coke has the highest potential for abuse of probably any substance I've encountered. And they both have horrible effective dose to LD 50 profiles. (LD 50 means the amount necessary to kill 50 out of 100 lab rats [LD = lethal dose]) For example, if you took the minimum effective dose of mushrooms, you would have to eat about 400X that much to OD. On the other hand, if you took the minimum effective dose of MDMA, you would only have to eat about 10X that much to OD.(source: McKenna) The point is, they left me in bad shape. Although I never ODed, I still brought myself close to that point numerous times.

Anyways, I digressed BIG TIME!! Sorry lol. I guess its just the good responses I've gotten so far have kind of helped me be a little more honest with my back story, in hopes that you all can see the bigger picture. And believe it or not this is kind of cathartic for me, getting this shit out knowing that someone else is listening. Keep it coming! good stuff:)


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Offlinechillywilly
Eat well - Diethome
Registered: 03/31/03
Posts: 104
Loc: 49 th State
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274757 - 01/26/04 03:21 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)


I have read all the above responses and have yet to figure out just what kind of a job oggleman is wanting.
Rather than taking just anything. Ill bet the college has job location and placement assistance even for interns. but if you were at the bottom of the class you might be needing a entry level Mc Job


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InvisiblethePatient
Criminal Bodhisattva
Male User Gallery

Registered: 07/07/02
Posts: 3,289
Loc: Indiana Flag
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274826 - 01/26/04 03:52 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

hey mang,
i know of which you speak of.

EverCrack.(EQ)  I was highly addicted to it during my 9th and 10th year of highschool. I gained weight, was extremely pale and i never went outside. I spent my entire summers inside and never wanting to leave my computer. What was worse was that ALL of my friends were also addicted. So when school started, the only thing that would get me through the day was thinking about playing EQ when i got home. What did all of this EverQuest Playing lead me to? Well... i did have a lvl 55 druid...  but i was fat, stinky, pale, and extremely anti-social. The only thing that stopped this perpetual downfall of normal day living was when one of my friends quit. This caused a domino affect amoung us and soon we all quit. A couple months later i got my first car and a job and between high school and the Burger-suck-job, i didnt have any time to play.

But enough about everquest. lets talk about depression and loosing jobs. A little more than a month ago, right before christmas, i was fired from my job. I was still "techinically" a temp (even though i worked WAY over my required hours), so they legally just said my job was "completed". This was a bit devestating, especially since my car had just recently broken down and christmas was in a week or two. The job was so damn easy and paid a good pay. I was data entry at a mortgage company, with awesome 40 hrs a week and weekends off. The paychecks i was recieving were more than ive ever had. Do you want to know the real reason they fired me? Because i was 18 (19 now), and i didnt fit in with the buisness fascade. Long hair... 00 gauge plugs. Although, i dressed the part. I wore buisness casual clothes everyday (even dress shoes), but i just didnt fit in with the older buisness crowd currently working in the place. The next day they fired my friend.  I was depressed for exactly one day. The day my friend got fired, he came over with a spontaneous idea to drive to Daytona beach and trip on LSD. Needless to say, i came back free from depression over a shit-ass job.

Dont do drugs, they arent an answer they're an escape.  :wink:  What im telling you do to, is to find your backdoor.

What am i doing now? its been a little over a month and i still dont have a job. I sit home all day and read interesting stuff online (mainly shroomery.) In less than a month, i will have sold most of my material possessions and will be traveling around in a Van with my best friend (some of you might know him as Adamist).

send me a PM if you want us to visit you  :grin:


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T h e r e  a r e  n o  o r d i n a r y  m o m e n t s.


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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 5 years, 11 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2274841 - 01/26/04 03:58 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

X, Coke, and Everquest will KICK YOUR ASS.

I agree with the "stay away" comment.


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE


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OfflineEkstaza
stranger thanmost
 User Gallery

Registered: 04/11/03
Posts: 4,317
Loc: Around the corner
Last seen: 4 months, 16 days
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2279473 - 01/28/04 01:30 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

It sounds like you are living a mirror of my life.

I just graduated from college with an Associate of Applied Technology Degree in computer information systems with a dual major in Networking and Microcomputers and I don't have a clue as to what it is that I'm supposed to do next. I'm not really sure what kind of a job I'm even qualified for, and worse yet, I don't feel as if I have learned a damn thing. Add all of that to the fact that I don't really get into computers very much and I'm left wondering what the hell I'm doing in the field in the first place.

I have the money that it will take to pay this months bills, but next month is another story. I have to find some kind of work very soon. I just feel that after all of my hard work in school it should be in my chosen career field. The only problem is that I haven't found a job description that I feel that I am capable of fullfilling.

And to top it all off, I passed on a $54,000/yr job to go to school in the first place because I thought it was my last chance to go if I was going to do it. I'm pretty sure that that job is long gone.


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YOUR EXPERIENCE WITH ANY GIVEN DRUG ISN'T THE DEFINITIVE MEASURE OF THE DRUGS EFFECTS.


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OfflineMrGrib
Stranger

Registered: 01/28/04
Posts: 181
Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2281370 - 01/28/04 05:43 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I disagree with the concept of someone's life having "meaning and purpose" in the Western sense. No person's life is more meaningful and purposeful than another's, period, billionaire or homeless and penniless. WTF?!

I would refer you to a book which I really enjoy, Raymond Smullyan's The Tao is Silent. I really think this book will help to brighten your outlook and help you to feel better about yourself during this uncertain and possibly scary time you're going through.

And to address the not eating right--I think this is a very serious concern. It is very hard to get the energy and motivation, or will even, to get up and get going if one is malnourished, not to mention it can make you crank, irritable, and depressed (trust me, I know from personal experience). If moving back with your mom really is a viable option (sure you may have less privacy), I would take it, because as long as your body isn't getting nutrients, it will only get harder and harder for you to bring yourself out of the slumps.

It sounds to me like we have several things in common regarding our situations and personal experiences.

If you ever just wanna chat (you or anybody else reading this who relates to the situation), PM me and I'll get you my contact info. Btw, I'm 22.


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InvisibleKttail
DragonDreamer
Male

Registered: 09/15/03
Posts: 114
Loc: S. Oregon Coast , USA
Re: unemployment --> depression... trapped:( [Re: oggleman]
    #2287246 - 01/30/04 03:39 PM (13 years, 2 months ago)

Been there, done that...mine was Mech2 and pot. Who the fuck wants to go to work when you can take a bong-hit, get on mplayer, and visit with all of your friends.
That all changed when I had a dream that my kids were taking me to career day and there I was.......*shudder*.
I'm writing this to you from work, during my lunch, on the computer I bought for the company. I'm still a depressive, but it's better now.
Monday I start training a new-hire. We chose him from all the interview's not because he was the most experienced (he wasn't), but because he was the most enthusiastic and personable. He new that he didn't have the lab experience I wanted, but he seemed willing to learn and had a mellow temperament.
Here's a clue......
You want a fuckin' job?! Get up off your ass and start filling out applications everywhere that has a goddamned door!!! Even if it's a shit job your going to get hired for a better one faster if you're already working. I'd much rather hire the person that is proving that they want to work than the one that may be too good to work min. wage.
You're on the right track with realizing what gaming can do to you. Just like anything else, in excess it's destructive.
Oh....one more thing. Even most shit jobs require you to pass a UA these days. My best co-worker nearly lost his ass because state random's came up and he was dirty. I had to cover his ass and he "stayed home sick" that day. I love getting stoned as much as the next person, I only do it on vacations now. Luckily most companies don't test for shrooms, which I also do in moderation and occasionally.
Good luck!!! It's a tough one turning your life around. Swallow your pride, move in with your mom, and prove that you're trying. :thumbup:


--------------------
"Do not meddle,
In the affairs of Dragons.
For thou art crunchy,
and tasty with catsup."


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