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OfflineMemories
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Registered: 05/09/12
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Thayendanegea] * 2
    #24411712 - 06/17/17 01:11 AM (6 years, 7 months ago)

Been sober over 5 months now.

Crazy that i've only used two weeks out of more than the last year and a half.

The Wharf Rats have been the best thing i've ever found in sobriety.

I party and go to shows every week now, and it's been incredibly easy as long as i have some sober alcoholics doing it with me.

Life has truly been good lately.


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InvisibleThayendanegea
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Memories]
    #24412302 - 06/17/17 10:36 AM (6 years, 7 months ago)

That'sgood to hear. No one can take that sobriety away from you. The truth is that you realized quickly that you needed to stop again and now you've accumulated 5 months of continuous sobriety. Having a home group that you love makes things so much easier, especially when you get out and do things with members. Integrating sobriety into real life is essential.....doing the things that you love to do without any chemical enhancements is priceless.

If you work the steps into your life or more correctly, apply them, you will soon find that you can go anywhere with anyone and not have a desire to drink or use. The fellowship of AA is awesome, just be sure to try and apply these steps as a parallel.

Congratulations on 5 months! and, moreso....congratulations to anyone who is alcoholic and has 24 hrs. without a drink.


--------------------
Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein


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InvisibleTheFakeSunRa
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Thayendanegea] * 1
    #24412443 - 06/17/17 11:46 AM (6 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

especially when you get out and do things with members




Yeah, but I think new members need to be wary. You'll meet good people in AA but you'll also meet some seriously creepy people as well. Sponsers, for example, can be very manipulative sometimes in a bad way. Like any walk of life you need to flesh people out. At first, all you know is they claim to be a recovering addict. AA is generally helpful but every silver lining has a dark cloud.


--------------------
[quote]Asante said:
You constantly make posts thatr fling middle school insults at people you don't like mixed in with maladjusted psychopathic comments about wanting to beat up the other poster with a crowbar.

You know how shit you are, you just don't give a fuck for precisely that reason.

I disendorse you.[/quote]


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: TheFakeSunRa]
    #24420251 - 06/20/17 11:26 AM (6 years, 7 months ago)

I'm working 12 hours a day 7 days a week, I get a beer when I get home. It aleviates my body pain and lets me sleep. I have wd there. 12 hours is a long time when I have to lift over 100k pounds a day.

I'm not clean or sober but I don't have much time to drink. To get sober I just woke up, worked, eat sleep. What I'm doing now.

Just checking in with you guys i'm not dead or anything.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: TheFakeSunRa]
    #24420261 - 06/20/17 11:31 AM (6 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

TheFakeSunRa said:
Quote:

especially when you get out and do things with members




Yeah, but I think new members need to be wary. You'll meet good people in AA but you'll also meet some seriously creepy people as well. Sponsers, for example, can be very manipulative sometimes in a bad way. Like any walk of life you need to flesh people out. At first, all you know is they claim to be a recovering addict. AA is generally helpful but every silver lining has a dark cloud.




I got lucky with my sponsors. But it's not uncommon for the older 30 year clean dudes to make young girls uncomfortable. Hit them when they're weakest. They had a saying for it like the 11th step or something. You gotta fuck me.

A lot of girls stopped coming because of it and that's sad as shit.

I don't care how sober you are you're a creep.

They can't get help and that's a sad thing to think about.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineNolan92
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24438333 - 06/27/17 12:58 AM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Hey guys

A month now sober but not clean, I go meetings at a rehab and I get drug tested regularly the thing is the counsellor is being disapointed and shit that I'm still testing postive for THC, I do not know how to tell them that weed stays i  the system for 4 months. They keep saying if you are clean and sober you will be test negative in three weeks.

I do not argue because what else must I do except accept it, I mention that it does take 4 months to clear out but if they dont listen I do not push it.

This is stressing me out especially since im on ritalin as a medication, I do not even know if I'm even recovering since I'm taking tramadol to help woth this and I want to stop the tramadol since its getting ridicolous.

Right now I'm at the point of If I want to I can't but if I can I will, I havent smooked in 2 months 1 month ago I was exposed to my friends second hand smoke.

I have not also drank since that time so yay at least thats there.

I'm having a hard time since most of the drugs I crave most of the people in the center do not understand, I once shared how I isolated myself with ethyl chloride and they had no idea what it was.

All they know is meth and weed and drink.

Right now I genuinly stopped drinking but for weed, once I head back stateside or anywhere it is legal I would smoke up again.

I'm in the philliphines btw

Such a relife to express share this

Thanks


--------------------
"be a child, never be an adult al the problems of the world are made by the adults."

"If a child feels like laughing he just laughs and it doesn't matter for him if others know why he laughs or not."

By Rael


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Invisibleeeso
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24438548 - 06/27/17 06:20 AM (6 years, 6 months ago)

It's jokingly called the 13th step. '13th steppers'


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InvisibleThayendanegea
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Nolan92]
    #24439781 - 06/27/17 03:57 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Right now, just don't do anything mind or mood altering (unless prescribed) today. Tomorrow, do the same...with time, all that shit will be out of your system. Also, get the hell out of the Philippines as soon as you can...that leader is fucked up.

Much better to deal with it here.


--------------------
Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein


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InvisibleTheFakeSunRa
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Registered: 03/01/05
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Thayendanegea]
    #24440744 - 06/27/17 08:53 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Yeah they've been straight up killing people suspected of drug use over there.


--------------------
[quote]Asante said:
You constantly make posts thatr fling middle school insults at people you don't like mixed in with maladjusted psychopathic comments about wanting to beat up the other poster with a crowbar.

You know how shit you are, you just don't give a fuck for precisely that reason.

I disendorse you.[/quote]


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Registered: 05/28/04
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Nolan92]
    #24440897 - 06/27/17 09:59 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Nolan92 said:
Hey guys

A month now sober but not clean, I go meetings at a rehab and I get drug tested regularly the thing is the counsellor is being disapointed and shit that I'm still testing postive for THC, I do not know how to tell them that weed stays i  the system for 4 months. They keep saying if you are clean and sober you will be test negative in three weeks.

I do not argue because what else must I do except accept it, I mention that it does take 4 months to clear out but if they dont listen I do not push it.

This is stressing me out especially since im on ritalin as a medication, I do not even know if I'm even recovering since I'm taking tramadol to help woth this and I want to stop the tramadol since its getting ridicolous.

Right now I'm at the point of If I want to I can't but if I can I will, I havent smooked in 2 months 1 month ago I was exposed to my friends second hand smoke.

I have not also drank since that time so yay at least thats there.

I'm having a hard time since most of the drugs I crave most of the people in the center do not understand, I once shared how I isolated myself with ethyl chloride and they had no idea what it was.

All they know is meth and weed and drink.

Right now I genuinly stopped drinking but for weed, once I head back stateside or anywhere it is legal I would smoke up again.

I'm in the philliphines btw

Such a relife to express share this

Thanks




GTFO of the phillipines !  :omgz:


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Moonshoe]
    #24468789 - 07/08/17 09:29 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Hmm man I fucked myself over again. I just got out of withdrawal. I was feeling good but I always just start drinking again. I've quit all drugs I can piss clean whenever. Don't even smoke pot and I live in washington. I can't stop drinking and it's ruining my life. I'm not sure how I hit withdrawals so fast maybe it's because my body is used to it from my heroin days.I dunno.

I'm depressed and sad and just fucking fuck. If that makes any sense. And I can't stop just rolling around again. I've been repeating this for 4 years. Throwing up blood yada yada yada. Fuck me. I know I'm worth more than this and how at 26 it destroys my body like this. I did go buy some booze today because I can't feel my fucking hands or feet and it's scary as fuck. But i've been here before every other week so fuck me right?


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24468855 - 07/08/17 09:51 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

I should have never quit heroin and started fucking drinking. Fuck.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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InvisibleTheFakeSunRa
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Registered: 03/01/05
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24468886 - 07/08/17 10:02 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Nah man. The process is like that for some people. Nobody is judging you. You can break out of this cycle. I know it's always the same questions but do you have a sponsor? Is there a defense between you the next drink? Another path to try?

Edited to say the nah man wasn't about trading heroin for alcohol

Dude you gotta kick both

Don't trade back!


--------------------
[quote]Asante said:
You constantly make posts thatr fling middle school insults at people you don't like mixed in with maladjusted psychopathic comments about wanting to beat up the other poster with a crowbar.

You know how shit you are, you just don't give a fuck for precisely that reason.

I disendorse you.[/quote]


Edited by TheFakeSunRa (07/08/17 10:05 PM)


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: TheFakeSunRa]
    #24469005 - 07/08/17 11:11 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Man thanks I want to start talking to my sponsors in montana. And last time I withdrew I wanted to start hitting meetings but I worked 7-7. Not when there were meetings. I don't have any friends and it's the reason I started drinking in the first place. I left alaska to get away from heroin to washington and started drinking which is so much worse. God damn the wd's are bad.

My ultimate goal is to become a drug counselour as i've done it all. I've shot up in every bathroom in anchorage.  I've been so sick I can't stand it. This is the last drug I seem to not be able to quit. It's cheap, everywhere, and socially acceptable. I hate it so much. I can't function as a normal person and that is sad to me. God i've been wanting to kill myself but I don't have a knife sharp enough nor a gun and i'd never do that to my siblings.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: TheFakeSunRa]
    #24469010 - 07/08/17 11:15 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

TheFakeSunRa said:
Nah man. The process is like that for some people. Nobody is judging you. You can break out of this cycle. I know it's always the same questions but do you have a sponsor? Is there a defense between you the next drink? Another path to try?

Edited to say the nah man wasn't about trading heroin for alcohol

Dude you gotta kick both

Don't trade back!




I did in montana. Not anymore and I miss being a stones throw away from people that cared about me. Even though I failed them constantly :frown:


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24469040 - 07/08/17 11:32 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

I have no value. I'm useless when I drink. I cant remember the last time I showered. Work fired me. Which they should even though i'm a damn good worker. Fuck I don't want to go back to the streets but every time I drink it's a 4 day process to detox. Fuck me i'm so worthless.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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InvisibleTheFakeSunRa
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Registered: 03/01/05
Posts: 16,449
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24469055 - 07/08/17 11:49 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Enjoywho said:
Quote:

TheFakeSunRa said:
Nah man. The process is like that for some people. Nobody is judging you. You can break out of this cycle. I know it's always the same questions but do you have a sponsor? Is there a defense between you the next drink? Another path to try?

Edited to say the nah man wasn't about trading heroin for alcohol

Dude you gotta kick both

Don't trade back!




I did in montana. Not anymore and I miss being a stones throw away from people that cared about me. Even though I failed them constantly :frown:




It's really fucking hard when you're deeply down but as long as you're still alive you have fight. Even just posting on here demonstrates a will to live. You can do what you gotta do. You gotta care about yourself first and foremost.


--------------------
[quote]Asante said:
You constantly make posts thatr fling middle school insults at people you don't like mixed in with maladjusted psychopathic comments about wanting to beat up the other poster with a crowbar.

You know how shit you are, you just don't give a fuck for precisely that reason.

I disendorse you.[/quote]


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: TheFakeSunRa]
    #24469075 - 07/09/17 12:06 AM (6 years, 6 months ago)

Always positive. Always and forever. I'm the happiest person you'll meet. I'm constantly brightening others worlds. Especially my addicts. I can see it I know who you are. You probably just need someone to talk too. Ima drink while doing it but that's just who I am. For now until I quit the last drug I do.

I have an affinity to addicts. I get and love them as i've been doing it since i was 18 and it's hard when you have family treating you like shit. I'm still a heroin addict in mothers eyes and i've been clean for 4 years from it. But she'll tell me how worthless I am every day. I just payed all of the rent here and that's what I heard the next day. I'm withdrawing and I kind of just want to be left alone. unless you can make me laugh as I need some sort of distraction as I can't sleep.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24469090 - 07/09/17 12:13 AM (6 years, 6 months ago)

I'll live. Always will. Maybe :p Thanks sunra I needed someone to vent to for a second.

I can't die man i have 2 sisters and a brother. And I can't do that to them ever. That's the reason my ass is probably still alive. I'm the oldest and they need me ya know. All though the youngest is now 16 :lol:

That's what was great about my sponsors. When i avoided them and started to slip they just said are you fucking kidding me. We were all hardcore junkies. That's what one asked me. No offense man but are you an ex junkie. Yep. Me too. And we became good friends. There is nothing you can tell us we haven't done ourselves.

One more drug and I can be a drug counselour. One more and I'm done with it.


Edited by Enjoywho (07/09/17 12:56 AM)


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OfflineEnjoywho
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Re: Alcoholics Anonymous (Come and share thread) [Re: Enjoywho]
    #24470276 - 07/09/17 02:11 PM (6 years, 6 months ago)

My ultimate problem sunra is I don't care about myself. It's why i'm actively killing myself with my drinking and substance abuse. I don't believe I have the possibility to be happy. I've fucked over so many girls because I get bored and stagnant so fast. I cannot decide wether I love them or not. Ya know.

I don't value myself anymore. I don't play music or write or do anything. I just work and kill myself. That's it. It's so depressing Ugh.

Well I do love them as people and I'm an alcoholic. I missed your smell booze and cigarettes. How depressing is that? I just said ya I know i'm a horrible fucking person. Haven't said a word back and she's trying to talk to me like every day. But i'm not good enough. I have no value. I just stare at the ground because of it. I can't even look people in the eyes anymore.

When I care about anyone my entire world changes. I will give you all of my money if you feed me and tell me you love me. I sober up start writing and playing music again. My reliance on people blows. I need someone to tell my stories too. But i can't find it like this. I have no value. And that is sad to me im worth so much more.


--------------------
"I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks

"The road to hell is paved with good intentions."

"In the days of kings and queens I was a jester."

"And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies

"Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"


Edited by Enjoywho (07/09/17 02:33 PM)


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