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Anonymous #1
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Get married ..... wife wants me to change.
#22508499 - 11/11/15 09:17 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Yeah so im a dirt hardworkin blue collar guy. My wife is on the Medical side ( chemist drug devolpor ect) .
Before we got married we were dating for more then +5 years....
I had a mental breakdown ( like a real one almost got put away) . She knows about my past and my "mental health" history..... Just lots of stuff happened at once and Im still manic.. Lots of the time I feel ok until I talk with her at all........
She has pretty much said I wouldnt have married you if I knew (mental health issue). I try oh god do I try. And she just gets madder and blames me and me going to the docs for these issues. I deal with things most of the time in a healthier way.
But she pretty much said things arent going to change because now im crazy and she doesnt want me around.....
We havent slept in the same bed for a few weeks. Usually I get 3-4 hours of sleep a night. (full time student(less then 2 semesters) and Im working for myself now I make more then what has been offered in any interview.... Shes pissed about that too). Just any good inetiontions I have if I fuck up a little or do something she says but then she changed her mind and I just wasted 20 in gas lifting heavy shit tying it to the roof rack blah ( I also got a ticket on "Her" vechile ( my truck) it was cause my horn didnt work they spent over an hour to find something to ticket me with......
So yeah she is pretty misarable. And im sure she will cheat on me if not already....
Already mentioned the D word.... been married less then a year........ I told her you keep everything but my pc tools and the truck which I will give you what we paid for it.... (the truck is now my studio apartment).........
Im so close to being done and having a good job. Ive been doing side work making tax free at about 10-25 an hour depending... Nothing is good enough. The mental thing isnt my fault not like I did a bunch of drugs and fucked it up no its from years of abuse , a brain injury ect....
Just need to vent I dont know what to do besides grab my tools and truck and sleep there for awhile......
This is how I feel if I was from the UK
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#22508664 - 11/11/15 10:05 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Just how i feel not suicidal but I am talking to people and my docs.....
Everyone is super young They’re fucking and they’re getting drunk They left me in the dust again It seems to have become a trend I’m sinking down the fucking drain Drinking away all the pain I think I’ll blow my brains out now
They’re stealing everything I’ve made Corrupting every girl I’ve laid Doing it better and getting paid I’m very very very afraid there’s nowhere left for me to go I burned out a long time ago I guess I’m just an asshole
(Eins, zwei, drei, vier)
Hey, tomorrow fuck you and your friend yesterday But you can never catch me because I’m old, I’m bold, I broke that fucking mold when I was young and dumb and full of fuckin’ cum And if you feel the way that I’m supposed to feel then you are.
Youth is wasted on the young What fucking planet are you from You think that you’re the only one who’s ever fucking lived before I have died a thousand deaths I’ve sucked upon a million breasts My compliments to all the chefs
Whatever gets me through the day is how I throw my life away These lyrics are becoming gay it’s just like 50 shades of grey You’re doing everything I want Being everything I’m not and reaping all the benefits
Hey, tomorrow fuck you and your friend yesterday But you can never catch me because I’m old, I’m bold, I broke that fucking mold when I was young and dumb and full of fuckin’ cum And if you feel the way that I’m supposed to feel then you are You are [x3]
(I am a relic from the past Praise to Caesar These days are all I've got And that ain’t much My life is the ambition If I was going to kill myself I would tell you You’re only young once, but you can’t be immature forever)
Hey, tomorrow fuck you and your friend yesterday But you can never catch me because I’m old, I’m bold, I broke that fucking mold when I was young and dumb and full of fuckin’ cum And if you feel the way that I’m supposed to feel then you are
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Mr.GuessWork
Stranger

Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#22510162 - 11/11/15 04:32 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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The only thing I'd recommend is that you at least get your fair share out of the divorce. Do a 50/50 split if you two have any major investments and don't let her kick you out of your home since it's your home too. She can sleep in the car if she's that unhappy.
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empty space
the void


Registered: 12/19/12
Posts: 1,120
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Mr.GuessWork] 1
#22510575 - 11/11/15 05:58 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mr.GuessWork said: The only thing I'd recommend is that you at least get your fair share out of the divorce. Do a 50/50 split if you two have any major investments and don't let her kick you out of your home since it's your home too. She can sleep in the car if she's that unhappy.
Yes I agree with this. Dont give her all of your stuff trying to be nice because from the sound of it, she wouldn't even consider doing the same for you.
Also have you ever thought that perhaps some of your mental health issues are caused by the way she treats you?
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The Doobie Dude


Registered: 04/28/13
Posts: 13,498
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1] 3
#22510611 - 11/11/15 06:06 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said: She has pretty much said I wouldnt have married you if I knew (mental health issue).
She sounds like a cunt
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"There are a million reasons to drink and one just popped into my head. If a man can't drink when he's living how the Hell can he drink when he's dead?" - Irish Limerick I PLURed once because it was PLUR or die. - D.M.T.
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Ezuma
Gontish Wizard



Registered: 12/02/13
Posts: 8,423
Loc: Roke
Last seen: 10 months, 20 days
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Mr.GuessWork]
#22511296 - 11/11/15 08:19 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Mr.GuessWork said: The only thing I'd recommend is that you at least get your fair share out of the divorce. Do a 50/50 split if you two have any major investments and don't let her kick you out of your home since it's your home too. She can sleep in the car if she's that unhappy.
yeah fuck that bitch man don't give up on yourself and your possessions for some intolerant cunt
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JacksonMetaller
Stranger

Registered: 03/13/11
Posts: 13,361
Last seen: 1 year, 1 month
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Ezuma] 2
#22512632 - 11/12/15 05:26 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Huh, you mean to say she's a medical worker AND an egomaniac? God if I had a dollar for every one of those I've encountered... She isn't ever going to be happy brother and it isn't your fault. She's in the business of seeing everything as broken and if it can't be patched with an easy fix "there's nothing nothing she can do". Forget nurture, she doesn't know how to support you. Your pathology is beyond her comprehension. Leave her in the dust and find someone willing to tend to the basic human needs and see how far your mental health progresses then.
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lillFish
Daydreamer



Registered: 01/18/09
Posts: 1,347
Loc: Recliner
Last seen: 10 days, 3 hours
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: JacksonMetaller]
#22516897 - 11/13/15 06:33 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Sounds like she resents you already. Do you deal with depression? I'm sure she would have to leave you before you would leave her, that's how it sounds. How would you deal with being alone?
-------------------- My Wish & Trade list
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SunnyD
WiZarD oF LoVe



Registered: 04/29/13
Posts: 25,236
Loc: Planet earth
Last seen: 1 month, 22 days
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#22516937 - 11/13/15 06:55 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Take this as a lesson to not get legally involved with people
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        And to everyone who thinks life is just a game, Do you like the part you are playing? This is the time in life I am living! And I face each day with a smile My music Library of Synthesizer goodness
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TheGreenArrow
Goodbye, Mr. Chops.



Registered: 06/22/12
Posts: 15,270
Last seen: 1 year, 10 months
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: SunnyD]
#22517506 - 11/13/15 10:27 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Too bad in the real world at a certain age a woman wants a rock...
-------------------- A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, design a building, conn a ship, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve an equation, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.- Robert A. Heinlein Saint RedBow of the Shroomey Loomey-Patron Saint of Sandbaggin Sumbitchs
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: TheGreenArrow]
#22518110 - 11/13/15 01:17 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Fuck that..what about a relationship changes just because you sign your name on a dotted line.. I mean one on one, not "legally"..
She wants to sport some shit cluster of carbon that twinkles, fine.. remember, try and get a big one..:jackass:
This whole shit's a fucking scam. Tie you down, dry you out, move on to the next one..
A lot of guys would be a lot better off if they could learn to peel one off in the corner, in the 4 minutes it takes... and get that fantasy Cinderella shit that some chick cares about you for 'who you are' shit out of their brain... breath it off for an hour or so and then get back to fucking business making cash so as not to one day be a 55 year old slave still attempting to jump through these bullshit hoops that this capitalistic society has given you a life sentence to serve..
Fuck that shit.. If life was a marathon, and marathons ended when the pistol fires.. life would be pretty short.. it's the finish line that matters...and that's WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY Tthe fuck over there.. better collect some resources.
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Amanita86]
#22518136 - 11/13/15 01:25 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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And while we're at it... women who guilt trip guys into having kids, or throw down the ultimatum.. you know, that "kid" is going to have a lifetime of dealing with this shit turned world.. life, death, the whole nine.. "I want a baby".. like a baby is an object... I want, I want, I want... she's gonna bail when the kid's roughly 10... and the kid's fucked.. no dick, no brain.. women are fucking nuts.
It's like a constant fairytale.. I guarantee, when the shit gets gritty, who the first one to bail is going to be.. this is just a summary, I'm not generalizing, but as I look around, it sure seems to be the 'constant'..
Who in their right mind give half a shit about a twinkly WAY overpriced rock, much past saying.."hey, that's a twinkly rock"..?
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Orange clock, pencil "They threw me off the hay truck about noon..."
*Mark 15:34  Gam zeh ya’avor...
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 13 days
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Amanita86] 2
#22523689 - 11/14/15 06:00 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Amanita86 said: And while we're at it... women who guilt trip guys into having kids, or throw down the ultimatum.. you know, that "kid" is going to have a lifetime of dealing with this shit turned world.. life, death, the whole nine.. "I want a baby".. like a baby is an object... I want, I want, I want... she's gonna bail when the kid's roughly 10... and the kid's fucked.. no dick, no brain.. women are fucking nuts.
It's like a constant fairytale.. I guarantee, when the shit gets gritty, who the first one to bail is going to be.. this is just a summary, I'm not generalizing, but as I look around, it sure seems to be the 'constant'..
Who in their right mind give half a shit about a twinkly WAY overpriced rock, much past saying.."hey, that's a twinkly rock"..?
Christ that is some misogynist bullshit.
The same could be said about men in a different way. A man and wife have a life that matters. A kid, good jobs, a house. And the man gets bored like a ten year old boy and bones the first thing under the age of 25 that'll have his dick. Throws his whole life away for 20 minutes of genital contact
People=shit. When you toss every bad human attribute into one gender you've just become an ignorant bigot
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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Burke Dennings
baby merchant

Registered: 11/29/04
Posts: 81,641
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1]
#22524048 - 11/14/15 07:32 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Anonymous said:
She knows about my past and my "mental health" history.....
Quote:
Anonymous said:
She has pretty much said I wouldnt have married you if I knew (mental health issue).
This is some conflicting info, so I'm confused. Did she know about this stuff or not? If so, it's unfair of her to say that she wouldn't have married you had she known. But if you went to lengths to not act insane before getting married and then after you're legally bound you just spring all this mania and psychotic break stuff on her, I can understand why she's a bit upset about it all.
Either way, you both need to get in therapy. You (and maybe her) in your own individual therapy, both of you in couples. That is, if the marriage is worth salvaging. At this point, one or both of you might see it as FUBAR. If that's the case, it's time to lawyer up and prepare for the divorce.
Good luck OP.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Burke Dennings]
#22525730 - 11/14/15 11:45 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well it has never gotten this bad before..... Ive been in therapy for years for these issues. Im trying to get better but she is being unspuprotive at best.
Verbal abusive is what my docs say....... I love her but she just sees the meds (which are keeping my fragile grasp on sanity ) as the only problem . Ive been seeing this doc for years and she still wont go in and has attitude about it.
Like I told her I couldnt drink more then 2 drinks in a setting right now she got pissed tried to hide it but not so much....... After my two drink max i smoked a bit and tired to relax for a few hours... ok most of the people have left or passed out the host is cleaning and she is just being a bitch and refusing to leave for 3 fucking hours... She started drinking at 3 maybe 4. I got home at 1230.... Told her I was done being her taxi and DD and just shit on so she made some bitchy ideal threats..
First my stomach hurts... then i might throw up....... Then if you dont give me a ride ill walk home ( drunkly whispered that one always works........)
Tomorrow gonna see if she really want to contunie this. Cut my loses before I make to much...... Fuck guys depressing as shit and last thing I need is another problem I need to fix,
I only want the vechile she can keep the rest of the shit ill even buy her out of her share if I must........
I just want to get better
Edited by Anonymous (11/14/15 11:49 PM)
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 13 days
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: Anonymous #1] 2
#22526883 - 11/15/15 09:56 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Don't ask her if she wants to continue this. Tell her you want out. Preferably after you tell a good friend what is going on and ask if you can crash there for awhile
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Get married ..... wife wants me to change. [Re: bloodsheen]
#22527511 - 11/15/15 01:20 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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No good friends here ..... The truck is under her name but if we go the big D route it's the only thing I want and I'll buy her out if need be
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