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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Uzziel]
    #22493366 - 11/07/15 10:30 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Uzziel said:
Yes and in your title it says "What to do"

And I'm saying stay the fuck away from his life if you don't want to really be a part of it.

Yeah you're gonna fuck him a few times then what? What about a few months down the line?

You can laugh it off all you want...




I'll eventually tell him I've been on suboxone for years. He used to work as an EMT, I'm sure he knows exactly what suboxone and Narcan is, and has dealt with plenty of people overdosing in his career.


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OfflineUzziel
O_o


Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 11,689
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22493377 - 11/07/15 10:34 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

That isn't what I'm talking about Crystal. I'm not talking about just the drugs.

I'm talking about your incessant need to do fucking crazy shit. Is he down with all that?

I know I'm coming of as harsh and that's my intent. I don't mean to insult you, I think your lifestyle is fine and acceptable.

I'm just leaving this here to for you to ponder yourself, do you want to slow your roll down and live a more normal life with a man or do you want to continue your insanity?

Maybe he'll even be down to be apart of your lifestyle. What the hell do I know.

Either way. It's clear you need to figure out what life means to you and what you want from it. It seems you're confused that someone is actually connecting with you on a mental level and you're not sure what to do.

Best of luck. Really. Wish the best for ya. This is one of those things that it's really only going to be you to figure out in the end.


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OfflineKonyap

Registered: 06/30/07
Posts: 33,945
Loc: Planet Piss
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Uzziel]
    #22493630 - 11/07/15 11:55 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

crystal g
you suck

but nah for reals wtf you can't feed some lil kid now it's practically free if you don't marry him the lil fucker gets free school too


Edited by Konyap (11/07/15 11:56 PM)


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OfflineTripsurfer
Bring Back Asante!
Male


Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 7,129
Loc: West of Windward Flag
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Konyap]
    #22494002 - 11/08/15 01:45 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

I am not sure he's going to be thrilled when you tell him you are an addict. He has first hand experience and chances are he drops you like a rock and lives in fear until his std-check comes out clear.


--------------------
Ach en wee ben ik de klos, met mijn boog schoot ik een albatros...

A philosopher is a person who knows less and less about more and more, until he knows nothing about everything.



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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Tripsurfer]
    #22494012 - 11/08/15 01:47 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Tripsurfer said:
I am not sure he's going to be thrilled when you tell him you are an addict. He has first hand experience and chances are he drops you like a rock and lives in fear until his std-check comes out clear.




You would be surprised how many people are accepting of it, even conservative types


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Offlinemm.
addict
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Registered: 06/15/99
Posts: 605
Loc: England Flag
Last seen: 5 months, 30 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22494148 - 11/08/15 02:41 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Show him this thread.

HTH


--------------------
MAPS.org: supporting psychedelic and medical marijuana research since 1986


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: mm.]
    #22494154 - 11/08/15 02:45 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

:lolsy:

I will say, there was one point where he was holding my hands across the table from me, and he noticed my track marks and was rubbing up against them. (I've only been taking subs but I still shoot them sometimes even though it doesn't get me high, and the only place I can shoot up is on my left knuckles because that's where I can find veins the easiest, so I have several scars on my knuckles that looks makes it look like I was in a fight or something.)

He was rubbing my knuckles and noticed my scar, he was feeling my knuckle scars up and down and looked at me quizzically, and I could tell he wanted to ask me about them, but I smiled and readjusted my hands to distract him. Hopefully he forgot all about what he saw.


Edited by Crystal G (11/08/15 03:22 AM)


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Invisiblekoraks
Registered: 06/02/03
Posts: 26,670
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22494165 - 11/08/15 03:01 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Do the NSA thing for a bit and once things get serious, walk away. At that point, there isn't much the kid has to offer you or vice versa and steering clear of the kid for the rest of your life isn't going to work.


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: koraks]
    #22494173 - 11/08/15 03:07 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

koraks said:
Do the NSA thing for a bit and once things get serious, walk away. At that point, there isn't much the kid has to offer you or vice versa and steering clear of the kid for the rest of your life isn't going to work.




Good idea.


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InvisibleyogabunnyM
fancy cat
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Registered: 11/01/09
Posts: 11,281
Loc: Nasty Women Get Shit Done
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G] * 3
    #22494795 - 11/08/15 09:03 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

I think it would be a shame to throw away a potential amazing connection because of your "rule". That being said - personally, I would be way more concerned about the person I'm dating having recently been a heroin addict than having a child. Since he shared his thing with you, I think you should share your history with him soon. He deserves the opportunity to decide about that the same way you deserve the opportunity to decide about whether you want to be with someone who has a kid.


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: yogabunny]
    #22494803 - 11/08/15 09:06 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

yogabunny said:
I think it would be a shame to throw away a potential amazing connection because of your "rule". That being said - personally, I would be way more concerned about the person I'm dating having recently been a heroin addict than having a child. Since he shared his thing with you, I think you should share your history with him soon. He deserves the opportunity to decide about that the same way you deserve the opportunity to decide about whether you want to be with someone who has a kid.




Yeah, that's a bunch of bull. If something is in your past and doesn't pertain to your life anymore, you are under no obligation to tell the person.

I'll tell him I smoke PCP and take acid on occasion whenever I can find it, because those are things I still do. Actually, I already did tell him I fried on acid recently and take benzo's regularly.


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InvisibleMr.GuessWork
Stranger
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Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G] * 1
    #22494890 - 11/08/15 09:37 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Didn't you say that you're shooting subs? That would qualify you as an addict in most people's opinion. It might qualify you as a recovering addict (shooting them isn't part of the program as far as I know). You can't really claim it doesn't pertain to your life anymore if you're still getting rid of a physiological addiction. I get that you want to put it behind you, but you're lying to yourself if you think that battle is over. Dealing with your addiction is absolutely part of the present, it's almost definitely going to affect your life and relationship, and a potential BF would want to know about that kind of shit before introducing you to his kid. Hiding it and pretending it's not at all relevant is definitely an uncool thing to do if you respect the guy. :thumbdown:


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Mr.GuessWork]
    #22495112 - 11/08/15 10:47 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Like I said, when the time is right, I'll tell him I've been on suboxone for years. Which is in fact the truth. I've been on it for 5 years. I am not obligated to tell him anything more, or the extent of all the crazy shit I did from years ago. Because none of that shit is pertinent to who I am today.

I do have to mention the subs though, because this guy is totally baby crazy. I know this, because when I told him I was having a hard time quitting vaping, he actually said, "Oh don't worry. I'll just get you pregnant, and then you'll finally get the motivation to stop nicotine altogether."

I almost spit out my drink and LMAO'ed and coughed like a motherfucker when he said that, but I was really thinking, "Goddammit, now I'm going to have to tell him I'm still on subs before he tries to knock me up." :freshwtf:

Not going to lie though, it's totally hot when a guy talks about how badly he wants to impregnate me. Which is weird, because I do not want kids AT ALL, and it's a huge part of the reason I've been so wary about dating anybody with kids... but for some reason, I find it so irresistibly sexy when a guy tells me he wants to knock me up and have my babies. Man oh man, that is hot.


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InvisibleMr.GuessWork
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Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22495156 - 11/08/15 10:58 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

You scare me sometimes, CrystalG.


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OfflineLucisM
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 28 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22495169 - 11/08/15 11:02 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

No offense CrysG, but he has a kid and you're an ex(?) junkie, I think you both could judge the shit out of each other if you wanted too, but where would that lead?

The real question is, do you plan on painting in blood for him, and how do you think he would take that.:smirk:


--------------------
©️


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OfflineCrystal G
I'm a teapot


Registered: 06/05/07
Posts: 19,584
Loc: outer space
Last seen: 8 months, 5 days
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Lucis]
    #22495378 - 11/08/15 12:01 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Fennario said:
No offense CrysG, but he has a kid and you're an ex(?) junkie, I think you both could judge the shit out of each other if you wanted too, but where would that lead?

The real question is, do you plan on painting in blood for him, and how do you think he would take that.:smirk:




I actually showed him my blood paintings and even told him that I painted those in blood. I'm telling you, we told each other quite a lot about ourselves on our date. He was not scared or deterred at all.

He was an EMT for crying out loud. He's probably gotten other people's vomit, blood, piss, and shit all over him in his line of work. Guys like that ain't scared of blood or shit. I'm actually excited about the fact that he's not afraid of blood, it means he ain't afraid to earn his red wings. :awesome:

I even mentioned the prospect of period sex with him on our date. Because I am horniest when I am on my period, and I told him, "Let's just say, I like guys who aren't afraid to get a little dirty." :lol: I will not date guys who won't fuck me on my period. That's another deal-breaker.


Edited by Crystal G (11/08/15 12:08 PM)


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InvisibleOsculateOfDemise
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Registered: 06/24/05
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Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G]
    #22496867 - 11/08/15 05:27 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

I always get super horny right before my period but once it starts I usually am in a lot of pain so the idea of sex usually turns me off. Though it normally doesn't stop me if my partner is riled up and wants some fun.


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Invisiblerackem
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Registered: 11/27/09
Posts: 14,024
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: Crystal G] * 1
    #22497244 - 11/08/15 06:28 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

if he stays with you, that kid will be in protective services in no time.

you shouldnt be in a relationship until you can take care of you.


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Offlineconcrete_666
fungus among us
Male

Registered: 04/14/14
Posts: 654
Loc: the land of the free
Last seen: 7 years, 10 months
Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: rackem]
    #22497337 - 11/08/15 06:49 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

:incredible:  :derail:  :mindblown:  :youseethisshit:


--------------------
Which came first, the chicken or the egg? If heaven was perfect, how was there a fallen Angel, before sin?


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Offlinebloodsheen
ChemChaplin
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Registered: 09/24/08
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Re: Had the Most Amazing Date Tonight--But He Has a Child (Dealbreaker for Me). What to do? [Re: rackem]
    #22497386 - 11/08/15 06:57 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

I was really drunk when I posted that I hope this guy gets scared off and I was totally expecting to get completely railed in here. Glad to see I had kid gloves on compared to the rest of you :lol:

Uzziel's got your number. This is just you jerking yourself off. You'll make this guy fall in love with you, make him toss aside all of his scruples and morals, possibly do a bunch of drugs, possibly not see his kid as much, and in the end he won't be the right person because there is no right person for you. Not at this point in your life anyway.

My ex used people the way you do. Treated humans like a giant chemistry lab, "lets just add a little of this and try a bit of this...nope, that didn't work, throw it in the sink and try again."

Funny how even though every single person essentially said the same thing you're still gonna pursue this guy to the bitter end. And by funny I mean it makes me want to give up on humanity


--------------------


A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog


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