Home | Community | Message Board

Magic-Mushrooms-Shop.com
This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Shop: Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order   Original Sensible Seeds Bulk Cannabis Seeds   North Spore North Spore Mushroom Grow Kits & Cultivation Supplies   Bridgetown Botanicals CBD Topicals   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom

Jump to first unread post Pages: < Back | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Next >  [ show all ]
OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 6 hours, 47 minutes
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: TrippieHunter]
    #22495190 - 11/08/15 11:06 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Everyone is on their own journey, and different things work for different people.

Regarding "Fake it till you make it"

I tried that for a couple of decades but it didn't work for me.

I'm 50 and within the last two years I've finally been able to stop faking being happy and trying to be who I think I "should" be and what I think others want me to be. It's hard work to be authentic.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineTrippieHunter
Swagger of a cripple


Registered: 04/05/15
Posts: 889
Loc: Your mums house!
Last seen: 6 years, 15 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22495210 - 11/08/15 11:10 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

I agree that fake it till you make it, is only a temp thing. Get from point A to point B, but when nothing else is working this helps.


--------------------
Just remember keep the camera rolling and
FILM THE POLICE!!! CLICK ME

WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON? CLICK ME TOO!

Let it go and you will trip into wonderland!


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRebelutionsssss
Mdmazing
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 07/23/14
Posts: 13,137
Loc: San Francisco
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22495227 - 11/08/15 11:15 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

thanks for understanding guys :hug: i guess i should get these ideals of what a life should be like out of my head. im 23 and its just kind of hard watching everyone around me graduating with degrees and getting important jobs while im sitting here still trying to figure out who the fuck i even am. but even after all that work and effort i see it still doesn't make most people happy. i guess life is just a bunch of trial and errors so ill continue on my crash course :shrug:

i love each and every one of you guys, i hope we all can find our place in life


--------------------
:
To define is to confine.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineTrippieHunter
Swagger of a cripple


Registered: 04/05/15
Posts: 889
Loc: Your mums house!
Last seen: 6 years, 15 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22495355 - 11/08/15 11:52 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Bro I tried school for years. I love learning but hate the program. Find a trade to get into. Your in the Bay you can do it. 90% of any job is showing up.

Electricians is a great semi easy career and they pay for you to get certified.
Oh yeah and in about 4-5 years you'll be making more than most of your "successful" friends.


--------------------
Just remember keep the camera rolling and
FILM THE POLICE!!! CLICK ME

WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON? CLICK ME TOO!

Let it go and you will trip into wonderland!


Edited by TrippieHunter (11/08/15 11:53 AM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinegbeau9080
WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB
Male

Registered: 11/01/15
Posts: 204
Last seen: 8 years, 30 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22495517 - 11/08/15 12:39 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

preschooler said:

rj tubs is obviously high as fuck





( not )  I'm playing the devils advocate that our worship of setting goals might be unwise and cause suffering.

One of the problems that comes with setting goals is when you reach a goal you feel good about yourself and when you fail, you feel like a loser. This causes misery by making life a huge roller-coaster. 

Lao Tzu said . . . "A good traveler has no fixed plans, and is not intent on arriving."

Some claim setting goals can be very limiting. If you're interested, the author of this article argues that, "Goals as a system are set up for failure."

http://zenhabits.net/no-goal/

This is as radical an idea as you will ever hear, as it goes against everything we've been taught. No other creatures on Earth set "goals", other than to just live! Think about that fact for a moment. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson, said it beautifully . . . “With the past, I have nothing to do; nor with the future. I live now.







lol I was going to argue otherwise, but I ended up agreeing halfway on my 6 page counter-thesis. Focusing more on the progression instead of the actual goal would be a lot more rewarding since it takes away the possibility of failure...to an extent


--------------------


"I'm like a catholic chasing a dreidel. I wouldn't know what to do with one if I caugh it!"

"It's simple: we, uh, circumcise the Batman."

"If you're good at something, never do it for free."


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineMoxyOx
Grazin'

Registered: 10/08/10
Posts: 1,439
Loc: Flag
Last seen: 1 month, 20 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: gbeau9080]
    #22495779 - 11/08/15 01:46 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Too many of us are hard on ourselves for failures, but failure is how you learn the definition of success.

"The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried."

The best things in life are not easy, they take patience and perseverance above all else.


--------------------
No one behind, no one ahead.
The path the ancients cleared has closed.
And the other path, everyone's path,
easy and wide, goes nowhere.
I am alone and find my way.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineLucisM
Nutritional Yeast

Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 1 month, 29 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22498141 - 11/08/15 09:39 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

RJ Tubs 202 said:
Quote:

Rebelutionsssss said:

I need to start making some goals before it's too late





I highly caution against setting goals.     

I'd recommend trying to resist the urge to make goals.

Just live each day, with no goals, except for living . . .

Life had nothing to do with getting things done, becoming something, or accomplishing anything.





I always fail hard when I set goals because I beat myself up badly if I don't achieve them in the amount of time I plan out for myself, so I feel like it's best for me just to have an idea of what I would like to do and slowly doing it.

I do well slowly working my way towards what I want, rather than trying to get success to quickly, feel like I make mistakes when I try to attain success to quickly.



--------------------
©️


Edited by Lucis (11/08/15 09:43 PM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 6 hours, 47 minutes
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: gbeau9080]
    #22501785 - 11/09/15 06:13 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

gbeau9080 said:

Focusing more on the progression instead of the actual goal would be a lot more rewarding since it takes away the possibility of failure...to an extent






Good point.

And some say if we abide by our values, there is no such thing as failure.

Quote:

Fennario said:

I always fail hard when I set goals because I beat myself up badly if I don't achieve them in the amount of time I plan out for myself, so I feel like it's best for me just to have an idea of what I would like to do and slowly doing it.







I hear you.  It's wise to establish values and create strategies for how we want to live, based on those values . . .

Defining ourselves by our successes is unwise, as the rich will attest to.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineBayneling
Inquisitor Slayer
Male

Registered: 04/15/15
Posts: 36
Last seen: 7 years, 11 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22509118 - 11/11/15 12:19 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Well buddy I am in the same position that you are in. Let me share my experience.

When one is lonely, as I have been and sure you are too, you are much more vulnerable to addiction. In fact, feeling isolated or disconnected is the main cause for addiction, IMO. Anyway, few years ago I just started working out, eating healthy and what not, I pushed and pushed in life. But see I had addictions to bullshit. Like internet, porn, social agendas (like always trying to be funny or.. something like that).
So I started going for long walks in nature, as much as I can, all by myself. I felt connected to nature, but not only that, doing this robs your brain of it's usual options, like making excuses or triggering bad habbits, I felt a sense of empowerment after walking an hour or two, telling my brain to shut it and dragging it along. After a few minutes of waling, it actually shuts up - then I would look at the hills, sky... and man, you just take everything in, beautiful.

I've even done some volunteer work, anything to get out of the house. Btw volunteer work you can even put on your CV/Job Apps, you gotta start somewhere, just keep it to yourself, sincerely. I started having this connection with something bigger than myself. I've become more authentic, I actually enjoy forgetting about myself when I converse with people. Also I did a little bit of shrooms the last 2 years, it helped a lot with teaching myself that my "problems" are not unsolvable. Being stuck in a wheelchair is a problem

But it wasn't enough, I was still addicted to porn, it's bad man, any addiction fucks you up royally, so I kicked the habit, eventually. Cause I couldn't even sit in my room anymore, this depro feeling would creep over me, I was fed up. That's how I got better and better.

Yeah that's about it. So the no 1 point. Stop being addicted to bullshit and bond with something worthwhile. Hey, you might as well :wink:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 6 hours, 47 minutes
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Bayneling]
    #22510706 - 11/11/15 06:27 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

You're right about "problems".

We're the only creature on the planet that has "problems". Even as a zebra is ripped to shreds by a lion, it does not think it has a "problem". It feels pain, but the only animal that thinks pain is a problem is us. What we call "problems" are us rejecting reality and wanting life to be different than it is. This is the road to hell . . . to believe life should be different than it is. It's why we've invented heaven. 

An interesting aspect of addiction is that desire is not necessarily related to pleasure.

As I look back on decades of drug and porn addiction, I notice that often I acted out in order to get rid of the desire ("jones")

Those of us who have eaten a half gallon of ice cream at 2:00 AM can relate.  Nobody "enjoys" eating a half gallon of ice cream.

Some researchers say that addiction is similar to falling in love. When we obsess night and day about the object of our desire.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineTrippieHunter
Swagger of a cripple


Registered: 04/05/15
Posts: 889
Loc: Your mums house!
Last seen: 6 years, 15 days
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: RJ Tubs 202]
    #22514920 - 11/12/15 05:09 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Bullshit I love eating a half gallon, even better is the whole thing. But other than that you make some awesome points friend!


--------------------
Just remember keep the camera rolling and
FILM THE POLICE!!! CLICK ME

WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON? CLICK ME TOO!

Let it go and you will trip into wonderland!


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 6 hours, 47 minutes
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: TrippieHunter]
    #22515101 - 11/12/15 05:58 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

TrippieHunter said:

Bullshit I love eating a half gallon, even better is the whole thing.






OK, I'll give you that!      :laugh:

I find, just like the first hit of crack is the best, the last 10 spoonfuls of ice cream just don't stand up to the first 10 spoonfuls.

We sometimes desire to do things that don't bring us pleasure. We sometimes desire activities that bring us pain, and realizing that is helpful to defeating addictions and obsessions.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineSade
Cheatin bastered
 User Gallery


Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 729
Loc: Bigfoot Territory
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22515144 - 11/12/15 06:08 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Rebelutionsssss said:
I don't have any identity for myself. I have no idea what I want to do with my life and feel like I lack the skills to go back to school and find something. I was pretty much moved through highschool without learning enough to function properly in this society. I feel like I'm just aimlessly floating through life without any sense of self :frown: I lack a good amount of social skills and have had this uptight nervousness these past few years that has stopped me from relaxing and enjoying myself.

It just feels like I'm in a job interview 24/7, like even around my friends I can't even sit in a relaxed fashion because I have this weight on me. Party's, festivals, even at home theres a lot of times I can't relax. I feel like my life is hopeless. Our whole purpose here is to find our place in life and put all our effort into making ourselves into something we can be proud of right? I have no real skills and no one here for me except for maybe one person and I don't know where to go from here :frown:



Well your grammar and punctuation is way better than mine. So you have that going for you.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleMr.PhilCybin
Master Baiter
I'm a teapot

Registered: 06/13/11
Posts: 11,642
Loc: Gnarnia
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22515216 - 11/12/15 06:36 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Rebelutionsssss said:
thanks for understanding guys :hug: i guess i should get these ideals of what a life should be like out of my head. im 23 and its just kind of hard watching everyone around me graduating with degrees and getting important jobs while im sitting here still trying to figure out who the fuck i even am. but even after all that work and effort i see it still doesn't make most people happy. i guess life is just a bunch of trial and errors so ill continue on my crash course :shrug:

i love each and every one of you guys, i hope we all can find our place in life



you're holding the quality of your life to the standards of other peoples ideas of success and happiness.

the video bunny posted is perfect.


what makes you happy dude?
you're doing exactly what you need to be doing right now. you're exactly where you need to be. a degree and a corporate job won't make you happy man.  I'm not saying that those are bad things at all, but chasing things outside of yourself can never make you happy.



it comes from within man, and it starts with loving yourself :aum:


--------------------
I'm stupid, Falcon91Wolvrn03 is smart.
I'm ugly, Falcon91Wolvrn03 is beautiful.
I'm a loser, Falcon91Wolvrn03 is a winner.
Someday, I hope to be like Falcon91Wolvrn03 but secretly know I never will.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRJ Tubs 202
Male


Registered: 09/20/08
Posts: 6,016
Loc: USA Flag
Last seen: 6 hours, 47 minutes
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22515267 - 11/12/15 06:54 PM (8 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

Rebelutionsssss said:

Our whole purpose here is to find our place in life and put all our effort into making ourselves into something we can be proud of right?





Trying to become someone you are "proud" of is a trap.

Our purpose in life is to love. Not to be anyone or do anything in particular. Yeah, that goes against a lot we've all been taught!!

Our conditioning begins in early childhood. Johnny does well on a first grade test, and his parents are so very proud of him. He learns over the years that when he performs well, he is praised, and when he does poorly, his parents are disappointed. When he does very poorly, he is sometimes punished. Johnny grows up to be a man that defines himself by his "accomplishments".


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleDaveyJones6911
Nonconformist
 User Gallery

Registered: 09/08/15
Posts: 690
Loc: EU Flag
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22517747 - 11/13/15 11:38 AM (8 years, 2 months ago)

if humans have a purpose in the universe, do they need to be aware of it?
does any animal have any idea of how it fits into its ecosystem?
i chose to presume that humans, if they have a purpose at all, are fulfilling that purpose
regardless of being utterly ignorant of it.
i in fact think we have no more a choice in the matter then a bea has a choice in pollinating flowers.
a bea is not aware of the sex life of plants, nor does it give a shit. it just does what it does.

and so we just do what we do.
maybe we are here to gestate a new form of life and technology is the foetus.
maybe we are here to experience limits and challenges that are impossible to know
for the omnipotent mega consciousness we are all fragments of.

i think if humanity has a purpose, the odds of us being aware of what that is are probably very small.


--------------------
Creativity is a dangerous thing in the eyes of those who don't have any.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePsilly Billy
Deranger
Male

Registered: 02/27/11
Posts: 76
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: DaveyJones6911]
    #22607365 - 12/03/15 03:53 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

Ask a mutual friend to formally introduce you.:grin:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineRebelutionsssss
Mdmazing
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 07/23/14
Posts: 13,137
Loc: San Francisco
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Psilly Billy]
    #22607366 - 12/03/15 03:55 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

It's been a month since I made this and I feel more lost than ever :sad:


--------------------
:
To define is to confine.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleDaveyJones6911
Nonconformist
 User Gallery

Registered: 09/08/15
Posts: 690
Loc: EU Flag
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22607559 - 12/03/15 06:38 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

who do you want to be?


--------------------
Creativity is a dangerous thing in the eyes of those who don't have any.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineCujllickduo
Male


Registered: 06/13/15
Posts: 19,552
Loc: England Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
Re: How do I deal with not knowing who I am [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #22607574 - 12/03/15 06:45 AM (8 years, 1 month ago)

what are your feelings like man do you know them, could you describe yourself clearly :smile:

we all wanto do stuff its human nature


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: < Back | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Next >  [ show all ]

Shop: Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order   Original Sensible Seeds Bulk Cannabis Seeds   North Spore North Spore Mushroom Grow Kits & Cultivation Supplies   Bridgetown Botanicals CBD Topicals   Kraken Kratom Red Vein Kratom


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* Change the world by changing yourself? resol 1,554 5 03/25/03 02:47 PM
by jarby
* Insecure about sexuality.
( 1 2 all )
Larrythescaryrex 7,207 31 05/06/03 10:58 PM
by tak_old
* Tips for dealing with panic attacks & -ve thoughts strategy enotake2 5,274 19 03/16/03 12:39 PM
by jarby
* Society! When you know there's something wrong...
( 1 2 all )
trendalM 5,205 23 04/07/03 09:56 AM
by trendal
* Whats the deal with this girl?
( 1 2 all )
Zwieback0 5,312 26 01/18/09 08:37 AM
by WhiskeyClone
* Dealing with friendship Grav 3,291 9 03/04/03 11:16 AM
by enotake2
* Confusion Is all i know BlowMiNose 1,462 9 04/23/03 01:12 PM
by twisted
* well I know someone who could use support durban_poison 2,120 3 02/21/03 02:56 AM
by durban_poison

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: CherryBom, Rose, mndfreeze, yogabunny, feevers, CookieCrumbs, Northerner
3,634 topic views. 0 members, 4 guests and 0 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.029 seconds spending 0.007 seconds on 16 queries.