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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23746592 - 10/17/16 06:02 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I have just been fantasizing about buying dope and coke for an hour or two :facepalm: I thought I was doing great came out of nowhere and from past experience once those thoughts creep in I might as well give up


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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23746594 - 10/17/16 06:03 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I gotta stop drinking.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy] * 1
    #23746612 - 10/17/16 06:06 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Cravings will pass!

Do you like video games ?.

I feel like getting balls deep into an addictive RPG game would really help me stay off drugs, especially with weed.

Games give that dopamine rush from leveling up and completing quests that can create their own addictive behaviour which for me is major harm reduction.

If i was recovering from a heroin addiction I would buy a top end CPU and an ounce of great weed and a vaporizer and just lock in.

I feel like being so in the the game would help distract you until cravings pass.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23746756 - 10/17/16 06:39 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah I just bought a ps4 and fallout 4 last weekend.  I haven't been able to get into it like I used to, and I can only smoke weed in bed or else I bug out.  I mostly throw myself totally into my work.  I am becoming pretty good with the machines there.

It's fucked though.  It's all fucked.  Thanks for hearing me out on that.



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Offlinekakashi68
Connoiseur of Illicit Substances
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23747253 - 10/17/16 09:02 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I find girls are the best distraction.


Way more fucking addicting than heroin :aweohyou:


--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: kakashi68]
    #23747890 - 10/18/16 04:09 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I learned a long time ago that I am just awful with girls and every time I fuck it up I start hating myself and being more self destructive than before.  I should probably seek therapy or something, but for right now I am just going to steer clear of women.


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Offlinekakashi68
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23747957 - 10/18/16 05:30 AM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

moonrockmushy said:
I learned a long time ago that I am just awful with girls and every time I fuck it up I start hating myself and being more self destructive than before.  I should probably seek therapy or something, but for right now I am just going to steer clear of women.




Trust me on this one... Opiates ruin all chances of getting a proper woman. IME anyway. When im on it, I lose basically all will to go after woman and im to depressed anyway.

But once i got off em. FUCK the world is different. Women look pretty again. A beautiful woman literally makes my day. Like I was NEVER a flirty person. But now I flirt with checkout chicks, or just cute chicks i meet ey.


--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: kakashi68]
    #23748990 - 10/18/16 01:42 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah that's one of the things that I hate most about being clean.


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Offlinekakashi68
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23749008 - 10/18/16 01:47 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

moonrockmushy said:
Yeah that's one of the things that I hate most about being clean.




hmm... Maybe try art - creating or viewing - (as in like all art music,film,tv,paintings ect.)

Thats the other big thing keeping me clean. Gives me focus and lets me appreciate the beauty of the world.


--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: kakashi68] * 1
    #23749026 - 10/18/16 01:52 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Yeah the problem is in such a vulnerable state it doesn't really matter to me what kind of quality person I stick my dick into.  I fall in love regardless, and that is just stupid.  Someday I will meet a nice girl and realize that I'm actually gay :shrug:


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Offlinekakashi68
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23749128 - 10/18/16 02:27 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

moonrockmushy said:
Yeah the problem is in such a vulnerable state it doesn't really matter to me what kind of quality person I stick my dick into.  I fall in love regardless, and that is just stupid.  Someday I will meet a nice girl and realize that I'm actually gay :shrug:




Someone very wise once said to me

"when you find the right one you will perfectly comfortable around them"

that REALLY REALLY stuck with me... and helped alot.

All through life I always just kinda hung around girls that made me really nervous and of course that turns em straight off.

You cant force it. You just... gotta know.


--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: kakashi68] * 2
    #23749163 - 10/18/16 02:42 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I am a very Introverted, privacy loving person who is most comfortable being alone.

I know my wife is truly the one because she is the only person who I am more comfortable being with than being alone.

She's the only one I never get tired of being around and never need space or a break from..

She's the only one who I feel even more relaxed with than I am by myself.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineApostle
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #23749514 - 10/18/16 04:58 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Vidya definitely helps. I just got a 3ds and its helped a bunch to keep me from feinding. I actually like it alot because its more focused on Gaming than say a laptop or desktop computer.(obviously since its a handheld gaming system)
I find that staying off of the internet, except for multiplayer,helps a great deal.
The 3ds is good because even though i can get web browsing on there its kinda innefficient so i am more inclined to just play games and even on multiplayer, there is no keyboard and you have to input data with a Stylus so people don't talk except in short factual sentences so there's like no chance for drug talk or anything else to trigger me.

on the PC its a lot easier to open up a tab and watch heroin docs or what have you. Also people in general often talk about intoxicants on alot of multiplayer PC games.



No kratom today. took some sub. Almost scored heroin but decided against it.


Hope you stay focused MM. there was nothing romantic about my withdrawl this morning. i want out of this hell and you'd be wise to never look back.


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InvisibleMush 4 Brains
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23750036 - 10/18/16 07:44 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

moonrockmushy said:
I have just been fantasizing about buying dope and coke for an hour or two :facepalm: I thought I was doing great came out of nowhere and from past experience once those thoughts creep in I might as well give up



Last weekend i was right with you bud :frown:

I had an intense round of cravings... I tried to score, i wanted a hit so bad...
Luckily i deleted all contacts, but i tried..

First time i had a real powerful craving in a long time. Moon is completely right, CRAVINGS PASS!!!


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InvisibleMush 4 Brains
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Mush 4 Brains]
    #23750444 - 10/18/16 09:49 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

You should quit then apostle, you can definitely do it!! It can only improve your life.


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InvisibleModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
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Posts: 19,227
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Mush 4 Brains]
    #23750460 - 10/18/16 09:53 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

@apostle
It will be over soon
When this bun dries up I'm going to try and go another month (at least, but to say quit forever is ignoring how much I've relapsed)

It's been an experience
I've never binged on it like this
Most I've done is like a bun in one day
But never a sustained multiple-shots per day for multiple days habit.
It's obviously indicative of trouble, every time I relapse it's been getting more serious of an addiction. I'm lucky enough that I can still see the way out but I don't know if I'm strong enough to stay the path.
Time will tell.
I REALLY need a new hobby, or to pick up an old one


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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InvisibleMush 4 Brains
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: ModestMouse]
    #23750504 - 10/18/16 10:04 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

That needle is bitch broham, stay safe. If you think you wanna quit then do so now, before something bad happens. Especially since you're young.

Its easier said than done, it took a lot of bad things happening to me because of the shit before i was willing to stop.


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Offlinekakashi68
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: Mush 4 Brains]
    #23752512 - 10/19/16 04:40 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

alright im curious.... How do opiates affect your appetite?

When I was using I was like ALWAYS hungry... or maybe not the right word. Im not sure whether it was true hunger or I was just eating to feel good (as it was mostly shit food)

Now that im off them... shit... fuck... Im eating LITERALLY a quarter of what I was.

lel... seems funny looking back. Back when I first started and I would get mad nausea and just throw up all the time ahahahhah Yet at the end I could just eat shitloads.



--------------------
You know, just sometimes in between the first cigarette with coffee in the morning to that 400th glass of cornershop piss at 3am--you do sometimes look at yourself and think--this is fantastic. I'm in heaven.
-Bernard Black



Edited by kakashi68 (10/19/16 04:42 PM)


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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: kakashi68]
    #23752538 - 10/19/16 04:48 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I have a wicked sweet tooth on opiates, and I chain smoke cigarettes.  I don't eat regular meals because things tend to just sit in my stomach.  Can't drink much alcohol for the same reason.  It all just tends to fester and come back up after a while.

I've put on like 10 or 20 pounds since I stopped taking heroin.  I eat a fraction of the candy and ice cream that I once did, but alot more regular meals, and I have a huge thirst for liquor.  I'm kind of a puss so I chase most of my liquor with soda which is probably my worst habit right now.


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InvisibleModestMouse
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Re: Where are all the addicts? [Re: moonrockmushy]
    #23753354 - 10/19/16 09:35 PM (7 years, 3 months ago)

I don't eat much on opiates
Just quick tiny bites if they're around

I've got two bags left
Should be my last bags for a good while

Probably gonna do one soon and then do the other one as late into tomorow as I can go try and cut down the minor withdrawals I may face


--------------------
Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?


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