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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
I want to shroom again but...
    #2246404 - 01/16/04 02:57 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

***THE NAMES HAVE BEEN CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT***

i don't know if it is a good idea for me to do so at this particular time. one of my best friends in the world (i'll call him POSTAL) passed away this christmas eve at the age of 18 from a sudden virus like menengitis or something with litterally a few hours warning of a headache before he died.

he was the happiest, most true and real, most awsome guy that i have ever known. he always had the biggest smile on his face and all we did was have good times together, laughing and just generally enjoying ourselves. the fact that he was such a great person and that he was so young has made this very hard for me, and all friends of mine and POSTAL (who are all really good friends with eachother). i still get sad thinking about how terrible this all is to happen and even wiped back some beginnings of tears during class the other day.

the last time i did shrooms was at the beginning of the summer with some friends, including POSTAL. it was one of the best times of my life. we took them early morning in the hills and just chilled out for what seemed like forever, but was only a few hours. i wasn't tripping hardcore because i didn't take many shrooms but i was tripping. i just remember looking at his smiling face and really seeing how happy he was and realizing how much i enjoyed his friendship, as well as my other 'best' friend who was also there.

POSTAL, myself, and some friends had plans to do shrooms again during thanksgiving weekend (because we are all away at school but come home during holidays) but we couldn't get any so we planned on doing them during christmas break. the plan was to do them the friday after christmas but after hearing the terrible news my friends and i knew we couldn't shroom at that time. at the time i honestly thought i couldn't shroom for a LONG LONG time because i wouldn't be able to handle it.

i really do want to shroom still and my friend and myself have plans to do them this weekend or the next weekend. i know you all don't know me personally but would it be sketchy to do shrooms so soon after such an occurance?

i think there are either two paths for the trip. i will either have a good time mixed with some reflection and a beautiful realization that everything is going to be okay or i can start to think and talk about him too much and get sad and go into a bad trip (which would be a REALLY bad trip).

i know i don't want POSTAL's death to be the focus of the trip because too much thought on the matter probably won't be very good for my mental state. maybe i should burn some weed for him or pour out a beer or light a candle or something as a final goodbye while on the cliffs watching the ocean, you know, something beautiful and meaningful and then go on with the rest of the trip and have a good time.

so please, tell me what you think about these plans or feel free to share a similar story if you have one because even though it is sad it helps to get these things out and to know that we aren't alone in having these feelings.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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InvisibleMOTH
Wild Woman
 User Gallery

Registered: 06/06/03
Posts: 23,431
Loc: In the jungle
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246485 - 01/16/04 03:20 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Hi, I read your post first in the Pub. 

It sounds like you're really dealing emotionally still with his death.  You have my condolences for losing such a great friend.  :heart:

I don't see anything wrong with tripping if you are in the mentality to show respect to your friend. 

Quote:

maybe i should burn some weed for him or pour out a beer or light a candle or something as a final goodbye while on the cliffs watching the ocean, you know, something beautiful and meaningful and then go on with the rest of the trip and have a good time.
 




Thats what I would probably do.  What a great idea. 

Well, whatever you decide, good luck man.  :thumbup:

truly,

ShadeGirl

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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246534 - 01/16/04 03:32 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

"i don't know if it is a good idea for me to do so at this particular time."

I didn't even read the rest of your post yet, but here's my advice:

If you're not sure its a good idea, then don't trip :smile: Its that simple.

You won't have fun if you're expecting to have a bad time in the back of your mind.

You won't have a bad time if you're expecting to have fun in the back of your mind.


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: Strumpling]
    #2246564 - 01/16/04 03:40 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

thanks shadegirl and strumpling...you are right. i will be with 1 good friend and maybe two so we are going to have fun. i probably will pour out a beer for him and do something else meaningful and say goodbye until we meet again.

if there is a heaven he is there, now i just need to make sure i can get in so we can chill again.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246594 - 01/16/04 03:51 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Let us know how it goes :smile: Peace dude!


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: Strumpling]
    #2246600 - 01/16/04 03:54 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

i for sure will, i might take my trip sunday a couple hours before sunset.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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OfflineSnape
Eternal Chaos
Male

Registered: 08/04/03
Posts: 2,285
Loc: Montreal, Quebec
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246775 - 01/16/04 05:36 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

I will send you positive vibes by the behalf of my soul, for you, your friends and POSTAL sunday evening. Happy trippin'!


--------------------
I'm floating in the sea of stars,
I'm drifting away from the shore
I will be lost in the dream when the dark days come
But I will make the time run backwards and
I'll make the stars shine again

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OfflineOook
Oook!

Registered: 08/19/03
Posts: 533
Loc: England
Last seen: 19 years, 6 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: Snape]
    #2246859 - 01/16/04 06:05 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

If you do decide to shroom, dont think about the fact that postal is dead but just reflect on the brilliance he brought into your life.
I'm sorry that you lost such an amazing friend, a tribute in his memory as you say would be a fitting way to remember him.

This is the first post that has made me cry, always think of your friend as a person that brought so much happiness to your life and someone that you can never forget.

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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: Oook]
    #2246914 - 01/16/04 06:32 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

i will be looking for those vibes snape and my friends and i will enjoy them.

Oook, he was that person, he always was and that light he brought everywhere and that joy he brought is something that i will never forget as long as i live. i couldn't remember him as a better person and that is something that is truly special about him.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

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InvisibleStymee
From here to reality.
 User Gallery

Registered: 03/31/02
Posts: 671
Loc: Seattle, WA Flag
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246942 - 01/16/04 06:47 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Condolences on losing a good friend.

I've tripped after losing a loved one. I was kinda nervous about it too.

But it ended up being one of the more meaningul ones I've ever had. I thought about this person a lot during the trip, then became very focused on all the positives things she brought to me.

Then I started thinking about how I could take those ideas and put them to work in my life.

And finally I said goodbye. It was a happy goodbye, filled with warm memories.

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OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2246983 - 01/16/04 07:06 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Stymee is right - Be prepared to shed some tears but also be prepared to put things to rest.. an excellent chance for some type of "closure."


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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Offlinevalour
Swordbearer

Registered: 03/02/02
Posts: 1,453
Loc: USA
Last seen: 18 years, 2 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2249680 - 01/18/04 01:38 AM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Today-

Best of hope with you. Good times always.
Sounds like you have the heart and head in the right place.
Strumpling and the others already said it better than I could.

"hey - don't worry, don't be afraid, ever,
because, this is just a ride..." - Bill Hicks

Valour


--------------------
"Remember, son,
I didn't sell out-
I bought in."

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InvisibleYarry
Old Timer
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/04/04
Posts: 23,762
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: valour]
    #2249689 - 01/18/04 01:43 AM (20 years, 2 months ago)

ill be sending some good vibes your way. be prepared to cry, but dont cry for what youve lost. cry for the greatness you had. Remember all the great things you do together and poor him a beer, maybe burn him some bud. I think this may be your coming to terms with his death and is a very good thing.. it helped me with mike. lemme know how it goes. peace


--------------------
Grumpy Old Man.

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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: Yarry]
    #2250390 - 01/18/04 11:59 AM (20 years, 2 months ago)

thanks valour and yarry, i will...shrooms may be postponed till next weekend seeing as to how it is a little dry right now.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineStrumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
Last seen: 12 years, 10 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2254001 - 01/19/04 07:47 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

heh yeah that's cool.... delay them until everything's ready :smile:

You've got a lifetime


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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OfflineRuNE
bomberman

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 09/23/00
Posts: 2,331
Loc: tartarus
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2254729 - 01/19/04 11:34 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)


Some might not recommend this, but i suggest a strong trip.
I'm talking ego loss.

This will put everything in perspective.

Rituals like pouring out a can of beer and smoking a joint would be a very good idea as closure on the comedown.

Good luck.
You're friend is still with you, so chin up.  :thumbup:


--------------------
~Happy sailing~

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Invisiblejdogg172
Shroomitarian

Registered: 08/26/03
Posts: 67
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: RuNE]
    #2254798 - 01/20/04 12:00 AM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Shrooms are good

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Offlinenicechrisman
Interdimensional space wizard
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/07/03
Posts: 33,241
Last seen: 4 years, 8 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: jdogg172]
    #2255673 - 01/20/04 09:57 AM (20 years, 2 months ago)

I lost a good friend recently too. I thought it might be kinda wierd to trip afterwards, but I did and it was really cool. I could kinda feel a connection to him still. Just remember that your friend would want you to have a good experience, and make it a tribute to him. He'd probably really appreciate it.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 

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InvisibleTODAY
Battletoad
Male

Registered: 09/25/03
Posts: 10,218
Loc: Metropolis City, USA
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: nicechrisman]
    #2257289 - 01/20/04 07:16 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

strumpling-good advice, i'm gonna trip, i've decided i'm ready and that it will be good for me.

rune-i'm afraid of ego loss so i'm not gonna go that far. i'm gonna trip 3.5 grams and take whatever that gives me...which should be enough.

nicechris-well, we were tripping buddies always down to plan out an awsome trip so it would have been him with me anyways. i'm gonna be with other good friends too. i'm gonna have a good time and i'm gonna walk away feeling good about it all. i didn't think i was ready last week but since then i've done alot of thinking and realized it will be okay.


--------------------

ca'rouse (k-rouz)
intr.v.
To engage in boisterous, drunken merrymaking.

Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineSnape
Eternal Chaos
Male

Registered: 08/04/03
Posts: 2,285
Loc: Montreal, Quebec
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
Re: I want to shroom again but... [Re: TODAY]
    #2257519 - 01/20/04 08:17 PM (20 years, 2 months ago)

Quote:

TODAY said:
im gonna have a good time and i'm gonna walk away feeling good about it all.  i didn't think i was ready last week but since then i've done alot of thinking and realized it will be okay.




That's the spirit bro.  :smile:


--------------------
I'm floating in the sea of stars,
I'm drifting away from the shore
I will be lost in the dream when the dark days come
But I will make the time run backwards and
I'll make the stars shine again

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