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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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My story - god and the devil are real
#22438558 - 10/27/15 01:00 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Arctic W. Fox

Registered: 09/23/14
Posts: 1,357
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22438585 - 10/27/15 01:13 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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tdubz



Registered: 02/26/12
Posts: 5,586
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22438592 - 10/27/15 01:15 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Going through something very simliar myself. I can identify with everything you are saying. At one point in my life i enjoyed psychedelics frequently much like you would weed or any other drug. These drugs however are extremly powerful in that they open up spiritual realities that one could never imagine. I thought i knew more than the average person when it came to conciouness an the enternal spirit but boy did i get a rude awakening this year.
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: tdubz]
#22438601 - 10/27/15 01:20 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I doubt what you are going through is as strong as this. My heart chakra is withering and dying completely. These drugs can be very dangerous.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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tdubz



Registered: 02/26/12
Posts: 5,586
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: tdubz]
#22438612 - 10/27/15 01:24 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Also the devil is a deciever it will reel in sin after sin till the very moment that you are about to die then the devil might pop out an say something to you (yes through the ego/spirit) dosent matter the language it can communicate with you and by then its too late you have become the devils bitch an a slave in hell eternity however it manifests not neccessarly burning in hell but perhaps another manesfestation of hellish reality.
Edited by tdubz (10/27/15 01:26 AM)
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tdubz



Registered: 02/26/12
Posts: 5,586
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22438625 - 10/27/15 01:29 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yes i am going through something very similar i would not have posted if this thread didnt directly speak to me....i havent posted anything in a year.
Edited by tdubz (10/27/15 01:30 AM)
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: tdubz]
#22439129 - 10/27/15 07:15 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yeah it's horrible right? We did not deserve this. Turns out the whole spiritual thing is actually just physical and now because of this experience I have a perfect sense of how to create the energy into my chakras and conform to gods will through right action but by doing so I am actually just further damaging myself. All my chakras are withering away fast.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Sade
Cheatin bastered



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Posts: 729
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439134 - 10/27/15 07:24 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439377 - 10/27/15 09:18 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: I doubt what you are going through is as strong as this.
You sure you still aren't a narcissist?
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: cez]
#22439442 - 10/27/15 09:38 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Sure I am but most of my ego walls are down now. The energy that is going through my system is getting stronger and stronger by the moment. I can feel it in every one of the pituitary glands and just burning them out completely. Its coming up through the root and just completely burning them out. I think once its done I'm going to be truly mad. When I tried to kill myself whilst on ecstasy i felt the heart chakra close up nearly completely from the trauma of it. Now all of the glands are going beserk, actually I feel fine now but I know I soon won't and I will be insane.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439489 - 10/27/15 09:52 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Don't go insane. Forgive and love yourself, that should do just fine
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quinn
some kinda love


Registered: 01/02/10
Posts: 6,799
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit] 1
#22439514 - 10/27/15 10:04 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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grapefruit
i am truly sorry to see things going so bad for you. i really hope you can weather this inferno as you are a poster i like and respect and have enjoyed your contributions here over the years. i dont think you are a narcissist either and i dont think any person is really in a position to make that kind of call about themselves. 
please seek help if you can.
-------------------- dripping with fantasy
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PocketLady



Registered: 01/18/10
Posts: 1,773
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439646 - 10/27/15 10:39 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Sounds like you could be going through some kind of kundalini experience. But with blockages still present in your system the energy can stop it from rising correctly which is why you aren't feeling good. When kundalini rises with major blockages still present it can cause psychosis. You need to stop any kind energy/chakra work you are doing immediately and find someone who has experience with these kind of things. I can speak to my teacher who has risen kundalini if you would like.
-------------------- Love is from the infinite, and will remain until eternity. The seeker of love escapes the chains of birth and death. Tomorrow, when resurrection comes, The heart that is not in love will fail the test. ~ Rumi The day we start giving Love instead of seeking Love, we will have re-written our whole destiny. ~ Swami Chinmayanada Saraswatir
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: PocketLady]
#22439923 - 10/27/15 11:57 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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My problem is that my chakras are too weak to handle the energy coming from them. It's very strange, I am at a point where I have a completely clear view of how to do right action and so on but the more I engage in right action the more it hurts the system of chakras. It's easy for me to control the chakras and abate the insanity from doing so but the more I do it the more it hurts, the more it destroys the chakra system, they aren't strong enough to handle the pressure on them. I doubt this happens to many people at all. I was very foolish not to see the dangers of what I was doing.
For most people if they get this far they are prepared for it and can keep their ego structure intact while doing it but the walls around mine have mostly broken down now. I'm basically a psychopath who is not a psychopath. I feel flat, dead and emotionless other than the emotions that are coming from the chakras, hence its so easy for me to control what the chakras are doing.
Pretty sure a teacher can't help me, I'm just writing this as a warning really. Just to warn that if you are getting serious pains from psychedelics and spiritual seeking you need to stop doing that right away and go much more slowly. Serious seeking can be truly dangerous. The whole so called spiritual thing is actually governed by physical laws written into the universe that your chakra system is built to respond to and be strengthened by actions. If you destroy those chakras through drug use I think you are in very grave danger.
If it is true that your body is reconstituted in a kind of hell realm between births and deaths, which I think it is. All religions have said it is and IMO they must be based on something real considering they are so similar and also because I see how these chakras work so clearly now. Then the chakras must be kept healthy otherwise you will sink deeper and deeper into hell. I actually don't feel that crazy at all right now, there are no voices or psychosis of any kind, I never expected to come to these conclusions at all. I just know that once the chakras are destroyed all my blocks against it will be gone, forever. It's shit that it's like this 
Of course you will all think that this is the talking of a deluded fool.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit] 1
#22440845 - 10/27/15 04:09 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I cannot fathom how you see things that way after reading Jed McKenna and UG. It's all phenomena, what perceives it? Don't believe the hype. Just let it burn. The only thing in danger is our own delusion.
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22440893 - 10/27/15 04:23 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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The Buddha, Jesus, Socrates and UG all believed in hell realms not to mention a bunch of others. I don't think Jed is enlightened anyway. Plus as UG said all this spiritual stuff is actually physical, acceptance of delusion inside is only maintained through a healthy heart chakra. I don't think it's about how I see it but rather it's physical. God and the devil are physical things.
It's fine and true to say god and the devil are one and everything is perfect but to live that is different. Delusion is certainly not pleasant even if it's paradoxically all lies. That's how I see it anyway.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22440932 - 10/27/15 04:33 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I'm in a tough place too man, there is a "knowing" but when I try to convey it with words it makes no sense. 93% of what people say makes no sense to me either. Words like god, devil, hell, and enlightenment might as well be gibberish. Wish I could help you... chakras, as a phenomenological conception, can't be destroyed, only constricted.
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22440970 - 10/27/15 04:43 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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That's what a lot of people seem to say but UG says they can be damaged if they are not strong enough. What carries on into the next life I really don't know. A life without instructions...
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit] 1
#22440984 - 10/27/15 04:47 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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There are no instructions for us because we are imposters. We are not the pearl, we are the price.
On the flip side, it will only destroy what you're not, it cannot touch what you really are.
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DividedQuantum
Outer Head


Registered: 12/06/13
Posts: 9,819
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22441008 - 10/27/15 04:53 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rev. Morton said: We are not the pearl, we are the price.
I like that.
-------------------- Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici
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Chirox
seeker
Registered: 05/18/12
Posts: 97
Last seen: 6 years, 24 days
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: DividedQuantum]
#22441047 - 10/27/15 05:02 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Try resting with some quartz crystal over your heart. It helps align the energy.
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Chirox]
#22441057 - 10/27/15 05:06 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Grapefruit, you are right that most people have no idea how painful and devastating spiritual awakening can be. By the time one finds out, it's too late, it's burn or jump.
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halo
Tripper



Registered: 11/01/07
Posts: 1,169
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22442490 - 10/27/15 10:20 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I'm going through the same thing now.
Perhaps not the same as you, but very similar. I have a thread on here a couple pages back about my bad trip. That trip was almost two months ago.
Grapefruit have you found anyone else going through this? Mine felt like my 2nd and 3rd chakras completely reversed, and my heart chakra feels very closed.
I find myself being mean and dismissive towards those I love most. I can't stand it.
I've fully bought into the spiritual trip. I knew it was real since my first few trips years ago. I thought I could just fuck around and postpone getting serious about my spirituality until I had other things in my life figured out. I partied, drank, used lots of drugs etc. Neglected to work on myself and do a lot of service work, which is something I have wanted to do and have done in the past. I just figured I had the rest of my life to dedicate myself to that.
Now not only do my lower chakras feel put of whack. My brain feels destroyed. Turned to mush. Surprisingly I seem to be able to convey my thoughts well through writing but speaking or forming thoughts is difficult. It's like I've lost part of myself.
I've been trying to change things but it seems too late. I just wish I hadn't taken that last trip...
It seems strange though, as perhaps our descent into hell isn't totally real or maybe it's just preparation to finally make us better people. Idk about you, but I've never killed anyone, never raped anyone, never stolen anything serious, try to be a kind person when I encounter people. I let my anxieties get the best of me over the past year but it just seems downright cruel that this would be my fate.
I'm still reminded of the quote from waking life: In hell you sink to the level of your lack of love in heaven you rise to the level of your fullness of love.
Here's hoping our chakras aren't permanently broken but are just slightly damaged and can be healed.
-------------------- All drugs should be legal
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: halo]
#22442525 - 10/27/15 10:32 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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My chakras have got pain and energy shaking right through them. They don't just feel closed, but like they are being destroyed completely. There are actually pleasant feelings at the moment but they are fading fast the more these chakras get destroyed. Is that what it's like for you?
My story is similar to yours. I don't know man more and more mine seem like they are broken.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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halo
Tripper



Registered: 11/01/07
Posts: 1,169
Last seen: 2 months, 8 days
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22442638 - 10/27/15 11:01 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I can't say mine feel the same way.
Mine feel like the lower ones reversed. This was coupled with an immediate feeling like I no longer have agency as a human being. For me this was all quite sexual before I considered the more profound spiritual implications. Basically it felt like my chakras were flipped or my essence left me such that I'm only worthy of getting fucked in the ass. For me this is frightening since I consider myself a straight male.
I was up for 4 days and this delved into a psychosis where it seemed the universe tried to convince me of this. In the meantime I was kind of mean to my immediate friends since I was freaking out so much.
Eventually I became convinced this happened because I've been living my life wrong and I've been very self indulgent over the past 2 years.
I don't really feel anything in my chakras now except for pain in my heart center occasionally. My other chakras feel more shut off. And it's not that I was super aware of them before. I recognized but kind of ignored them. Definitely more noticeable when something goes wrong.
Praying that I can get back to normal right now. Idk about you, but its been hard for me to enjoy anything right now. This has been going on almost two months for me.
-------------------- All drugs should be legal
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: halo]
#22442717 - 10/27/15 11:27 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Your problem seems more ok. I'm getting more and more convinced this problem I have is getting much much worse. There is energy moving up all the chakras, and I can't stop it at all. It's just flowing without end, there's no way to control it or lessen it. I wake up shaking. They are all being very rapidly destroyed. You need to have an ego before you can lose it, if you are a narcissist you have no real ego structure so if you pass the first step of spiritual awakening your ego structure is going to break down. It's like being in that place where you can have a kundalini awakening without being ready for it at all.
If that happens you have no way to control the energy from flowing into your chakras any more, it just goes up and up and destroys them completely. There isn't any hope of recovering from this kind of thing, I'm certain of that now.
People say your chakras cant be damaged but they can in a rare instance like this.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22443125 - 10/28/15 02:17 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Just an update, this is getting worse and worse. There is very bad pain in every single one of my chakras and it's only increasing more and more. I am overwhelmed by all sorts of the feelings that come from the chakras aswell as the feeling of blackness that is like a satanic feeling. Pretty sure I'm gonna die soon.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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FishOilTheKid
Ascended



Registered: 11/14/10
Posts: 5,401
Last seen: 2 days, 2 hours
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22443437 - 10/28/15 06:00 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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You could be under psychic attack by demonic beings that populate a sort of hell realm that I've permanently accessed. That is my fate or circumstance as of now. 'We create hell and we thrive on it.' That was said to me by one of these beings. What people call Kundalini I'm confused about... Some of these beings make their way up your ass to inhabit your body and make their way up the spinal column to plug into the brain. From there they operate an ongoing hallucination using the minds own imagery.
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halo
Tripper



Registered: 11/01/07
Posts: 1,169
Last seen: 2 months, 8 days
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: FishOilTheKid]
#22443962 - 10/28/15 09:11 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Grapefruit when did this all start for you?
I don't doubt that your experience is worse than mine. But mine has been pretty ducking bad. Basically insomnia, no sex drive, no appetite, can't really tell when I need to shit, impossible to feel joy right now, headaches, teeth grinding until I have cavities. Also the impaired mental and speech abilities. Hair falling out.
All of this started in the past month and a half.
Fishoilthekid, I don't doubt that malevolent spirits could play a part in this. After the first couple weeks I realized kundalini was playing a role and I was having extreme psychosis and synchronicities. Even started to have a mild schizophrenia at one point, I had uncontrollable voices and I was able to get rid of them by lowering the kundalini energy. When it was all the way up my spine in my head it was causing this. But by lowering the energy I stopped the malevolent type voices.
I'm still not sure if this was good though. Part of me wonders if I should have left things like that and dealt eitubthings better.
The lack of knowledge on this state is so frustrating. Lots of people have taken psychedelics. Lots of people have had bad trips. It's infuriating that I can't seem to find hardly anyone who has gone through the same thing. I just want to know what I have to do to heal myself and resume my life from where I left off.
It honestly has felt like I'm living in hell or some precursor to it. And I don't like this. Before this I was a pretty happy dude for the most part. Always tried to be cool and help others have a good time. I had one weekend of getting too fucked and then it's basically ruined my life. I don't mean to hijack your thread, but I am kind of relieved that someone else is in a similar situation.
-------------------- All drugs should be legal
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Swarupa

Registered: 10/13/15
Posts: 61
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22444240 - 10/28/15 10:30 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
quinn said: grapefruit
i am truly sorry to see things going so bad for you. i really hope you can weather this inferno as you are a poster i like and respect and have enjoyed your contributions here over the years.
I feel the same... i wouldn't write yourself off so soon man, these kind of situations can escalate quite quickly but also be seen through just as swiftly. Sometimes you have to go through hell to get where your going...
Maybe you could elaborate a bit more on how this whole thing escalated? What substances you've been using, how frequently, warning signs to look out for... if you'd like to help others by warning them it could be nice to share some more details about this.
I've found that pretty much everything i've learned from entheogens, the difference between hell & heaven, all comes down to fear & love.
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Nemodeus
Introvert

Registered: 04/01/14
Posts: 427
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22444588 - 10/28/15 12:03 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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In matters as subjective as spirit faith is of utmost importance. Be it faith in a deity or faith in yourself, you must accept that all will be well with time. Otherwise your working against yourself.
-------------------- In an entheogen influenced moment of clarity I came to understand that reality manifests as a dream from the collective subconscious minds of all conscious entities. Nothingness made something because we collectively believe it into being, and physical laws given power by the reinforcement of conscious observation. Creation, destruction, and even time itself are but an aspect of ourselves and we of them. Life and death, simply illusions we face from a limited grasp of our own existence. We are one, all is eternal.
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22444955 - 10/28/15 01:44 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: Just an update, this is getting worse and worse. There is very bad pain in every single one of my chakras and it's only increasing more and more. I am overwhelmed by all sorts of the feelings that come from the chakras aswell as the feeling of blackness that is like a satanic feeling. Pretty sure I'm gonna die soon.
You are on the verge of a huge breakthrough, man, if you can give up your beliefs about what is happening. You don't need meds or a guru if you can open to it all the way.
Stay sober. Do pranayam and asanas. Chakras are like whirlpools in water, they are just patterns of movement. They will reform.
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Hobozen


Registered: 11/03/11
Posts: 10,634
Loc:
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22445324 - 10/28/15 03:07 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Positive self talk!! Music emeditation. I watched a documentary on Alzheimer's patients, music allows them to connect with their lost memories and joy. Someone above mentioned crystals.. sounds like hocus pocus but it's worth giving a shot. Books on magick.. cultivation of personal power, etc. Group meditation. Smoked DMT on some caapi vine.
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CosmicJoke
happy mutant



Registered: 04/05/00
Posts: 10,848
Loc: Portland, OR
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Middleman]
#22446322 - 10/28/15 07:39 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rev. Morton said:
Quote:
Grapefruit said: Just an update, this is getting worse and worse. There is very bad pain in every single one of my chakras and it's only increasing more and more. I am overwhelmed by all sorts of the feelings that come from the chakras aswell as the feeling of blackness that is like a satanic feeling. Pretty sure I'm gonna die soon.
You are on the verge of a huge breakthrough, man, if you can give up your beliefs about what is happening. You don't need meds or a guru if you can open to it all the way.
Stay sober. Do pranayam and asanas. Chakras are like whirlpools in water, they are just patterns of movement. They will reform.
Pranayam has done so much for my anxiety to provide a warm glow and fall in love with being. Like hanging out with people who experience love (or /cough slack) too, big help to get away from people who just perpetuate the drama in your life.
-------------------- Everything is better than it was the last time. I'm good. If we could look into each others hearts, and understand the unique challenges each of us faces, I think we would treat each other much more gently, with more love, patience, tolerance, and care. It takes a lot of courage to go out there and radiate your essence. I know you scared, you should ask us if we scared too. If you was there, and we just knew you cared too.
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Eggtimer
HotSauce Lover

Registered: 05/04/13
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22447391 - 10/29/15 12:13 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Rise, awake! Having obtained these boons, understand them! Like the Razor's sharp edge is difficult to traverse, The path to one's Self is difficult. — Katha Upanishad, 1.3.14
Quote:
Man is only what he believeth, a brother of darkness or a child of the Light.
Enter not the celestial realms with fear/doubt in your heart. Believe in nothing because if you believe in something it precludes you from believing the opposite. If you're offend and enraged by other people's beliefs it's because you are unsure of yourself and the things you believe.
Meditation and breathwork and allowing suppressed and unfinished emotional experiences to come up to experience them fully is the best way out of what you're describing. Sit alone with yourself in the dark and allow your thoughts to flow without judging them as good or bad or thinking I shouldn't be having these thoughts.
The more you suppress thoughts you think you shouldn't be having the stronger they are. There are no bad thoughts. You don't really think your thoughts they appear like clouds. You are the observer of them.
Also don't allow other people's ideas to define what you think you're experiencing. Forget all you think you know and start from there.

Quote:
Know ye, O my brother, that fear is an obstacle great. Be master of all in the brightness, the shadow will soon disappear. Hear ye and heed my wisdom, the voice of LIGHT is clear. Seek not the valley of shadow, and LIGHT will only appear.
List ye, O man, to the depth of my wisdom. Speak I of knowledge hidden from man. Far have I been on my journey through SPACE-TIME, even to the end of space of this cycle. Aye, glimpsed the HOUNDS of the Barrier, lying in wait for he who would pass them. In that space where time exists not, faintly I sensed the guardians of cycles. Move they only through angles. Free are they not of the curved dimensions.
Strange and terrible are the HOUNDS of the Barrier. Follow they consciousness to the limits of space. Think not to escape by entering your body, for follow they fast the Soul through angles. Only the circle will give ye protection, save from the claws of the DWELLERS IN ANGLES.
Once, in a time past, I approached the great Barrier, and saw on the shores where time exists not, the formless forms of the HOUNDS of the barrier. Aye, hiding in the midst beyond time I found them; and THEY, scenting me afar off, raised themselves and gave the great bell cry that could be heard from cycle to cycle and moved through space toward my soul.
Fled I then fast before them, back from time's unthinkable end. But ever after me pursued they, moving in strange angles not known to man. Aye, on the gray shores of TIME-SPACE'S end found I the HOUNDS of the Barrier, ravening for the Soul who attempts the beyond.
Fled I through circles back to my body. Fled, and fast after me they followed. Aye, after me the devourers followed, seeking through angles to devour my Soul.
Aye, know ye man, that the Soul who dares the Barrier may be held in bondage by the HOUNDS from beyond time, held till this cycle is completed and left behind when the consciousness leaves.
Entered I my body. Created the circles that know not angles, created the form that from my form was formed. Made my body into a circle and lost the pursuers in the circles of time. But, even yet, when free from my body, cautious ever must I be not to move through angles, else my soul may never be free.
Know ye, the HOUNDS of the Barrier move only through angles and never through curves of space. Only by moving through curves can ye escape them, for in angles they will pursue thee. O man, heed ye my warning; Seek not to break open the gate to beyond. Few there are who have succeeded in passing the Barrier to the greater LIGHT that shines beyond. For know ye, ever the dwellers, seek such Souls to hold in their thrall.
Listen, O man, and heed ye my warning; seek ye to move not in angles but curves, And if while free from thy body, though hearest the sound like the bay of a hound ringing clear and bell-like through thy being, flee back to thy body through circles, penetrate not the midst mist before.
When thou hath entered the form thou hast dwelt in, use thou the cross and the circle combined. Open thy mouth and use thou thy Voice. Utter the WORD and thou shalt be free. Only the one who of LIGHT has the fullest can hope to pass by the guards of the way. And then must he move through strange curves and angles that are formed in direction not know to man.
List ye, O man, and heed ye my warning: attempt not to pass the guards on the way. Rather should ye seek to gain of thine own Light and make thyself ready to pass on the way.
-------------------- It's all for the s
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Eggtimer]
#22447629 - 10/29/15 02:03 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Not sure you guys quite get what has happened here. The ego structure (constant thinking about past/future, some kind of thread of relational thoughts) is completely gone in me now. There is only the present moment. That's the only thing that blocks the chakras in most people. It's so easy for me to control right and wrong action and the effects of the chakras now but the more I do right action the more it hurts the chakras.
Pretty sure this is an extremely rare experience. Most pathological narcissists would never get this far because they would stop psychedelic use due to the pains it was giving them. However my notion was that there was something better on the other side. Once I passed the first step everything went downhill very rapidly.
When I did this thing of slitting my wrists on ecstasy that really severely blocked the heart chakra. I just wish I had tried to end my life in a less traumatic way. There is still extreme pain in the all chakras and especially the heart. Asana would make things worse not better very rapidly.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
Edited by Grapefruit (10/29/15 02:14 AM)
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enlightened seed
Utopia is a state of mind



Registered: 05/04/07
Posts: 2,117
Loc: amongst civilization
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Eggtimer]
#22447631 - 10/29/15 02:05 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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satan will not win
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Nemodeus
Introvert

Registered: 04/01/14
Posts: 427
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22447895 - 10/29/15 05:52 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: Not sure you guys quite get what has happened here. The ego structure (constant thinking about past/future, some kind of thread of relational thoughts) is completely gone in me now. There is only the present moment.
If designed only for the present moment, your words are without value. So the question arises, why are you here sharing your story?
The very act of passing on your experience signifies hope.
-------------------- In an entheogen influenced moment of clarity I came to understand that reality manifests as a dream from the collective subconscious minds of all conscious entities. Nothingness made something because we collectively believe it into being, and physical laws given power by the reinforcement of conscious observation. Creation, destruction, and even time itself are but an aspect of ourselves and we of them. Life and death, simply illusions we face from a limited grasp of our own existence. We are one, all is eternal.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22449325 - 10/29/15 01:52 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
It's so easy for me to control right and wrong action and the effects of the chakras now but the more I do right action the more it hurts the chakras.
This is a contradiction, control-> hurt, and right action-> hurt.
The chakras aren't meant to be wide open all the time. Generally speaking they should be mostly closed (though perhaps not stuck). It's a problem, yet not one that can be addressed by the medical community. At any rate, you're stuck with it til it calms down.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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Middleman

Registered: 07/11/99
Posts: 8,399
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22449372 - 10/29/15 02:06 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said:
Asana would make things worse not better very rapidly.
If you really want to be awoken from, make it worse not better.
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Douglas Howard
Stranger
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22450004 - 10/29/15 04:55 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
The Bible is the real history of this world. Some of the stuff that is mentioned in the Bible and which the word Bible is a shortened form way for saying bibliography, it might sound far fetch, but if you really do your research, you will find out that it is the truth. Like the story of the Great flood; that there is evidence of a great flood, but there are some people that are trying their best to distort it because they want the history of this world to fit what was taught to them as a child, that everything has evolved from a single speck. Nobody doesn't like to know that there is someone that can see what they had done in the dark and so they tries to convince themselves by convincing others that there is no alternative realm within a realm; you just has one life to live and should live it to the fullest.
biblio- Word Origin 1. a combining form occurring in loanwords from Greek (bibliography); on this model, used in the formation of compound words with the meaning “book” (bibliophile), and sometimes with the meaning “Bible” (bibliolatry, on the model of idolatry).
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Douglas Howard]
#22450036 - 10/29/15 05:01 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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The Bible is the real history of this world?
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enlightened seed
Utopia is a state of mind



Registered: 05/04/07
Posts: 2,117
Loc: amongst civilization
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: cez]
#22450119 - 10/29/15 05:17 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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yeah and shit doesn't stink
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FishOilTheKid
Ascended



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Douglas Howard
Stranger
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: FishOilTheKid]
#22451124 - 10/29/15 08:58 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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It is hard to believe in something that our five senses cannot perceive; but there is a realm within us, but we has gotten detached from one and stayed more connected to our natural side. Some of the things that are in the scriptures sounds impossible, but some people had experienced some of these impossibles. The ones that had these experiences tries to explain it to others, but the others do mot believe because they hasn't seen it for themselves. Like if someone experienced levitation, like walking on water and etc.., but tries to explain their experienced to someone that didn't seen it, the unbeliever will think that they must of have had some type of mental disorder of some sort. Like in the 1600's, a friar that people had witnessed levitating had thought that he was of the devil; and like Joan of Arc, they had thought she was demon possessed because of her abilities to predict. And so most of the prophets were killed by evil people that had claimed to be with God, like wolves in sheep's clothing. They were trying to claimed that Jesus was Beelzebub, and so they will do anything to those that comes after him.
 As the phenomenon of flying or levitation was widely believed to be connected with witchcraft, Joseph was denounced to the Inquisition. At their command, he was transferred from one Franciscan friary in the region to another for observation, first to Assisi (1639–53), then briefly to Pietrarubbia and finally Fossombrone, where he lived with and under the supervision of the Capuchin friars (1653–57). He practiced a severe asceticism throughout his life, usually eating solid food only twice a week. He passed 35 years of his life following this regimen.
Finally, on 9 July 1657, Joseph was allowed to return to a Conventual community, being sent to the one in Osimo, where he soon died. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_of_Cupertino

Eyewitnesses described the scene of the execution by burning on 30 May 1431. Tied to a tall pillar at the Vieux-Marché in Rouen, she asked two of the clergy, Fr Martin Ladvenu and Fr Isambart de la Pierre, to hold a crucifix before her. An English soldier also constructed a small cross which she put in the front of her dress. After she died, the English raked back the coals to expose her charred body so that no one could claim she had escaped alive, then burned the body twice more to reduce it to ashes and prevent any collection of relics. They cast her remains into the Seine River.[83] The executioner, Geoffroy Thérage, later stated that he "... greatly feared to be damned."[84] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joan_of_Arc
Luke 11:49 Because of this, God in his wisdom said, ‘I will send them prophets and apostles, some of whom they will kill and others they will persecute.’
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halo
Tripper



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Douglas Howard]
#22451260 - 10/29/15 09:23 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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OP for what it's worth I think you're alright.
The fact that you are worrying about this is a good sign. It means you have your head on straight, for what you are going through does seem to be frightening.
My experience definitely seems a bit different than yours but not totally unrelated. I think you and I both will make it through this, the real question is how. I definitely sympathize with the "right action" hurting you. I recently volunteered at a homeless type shelter, trying to help out, and it was great...but I pretty much had more in common with the homeless people coming there for help moreso than the people working there. And I'd been there before, never felt like that. It was jarring to say the least.
Douglas I don't think anyone here is doubting the existence of the Divine or even of God necessarily, but what makes the Bible the ultimate authority for you? I've always been spiritual but frankly it's hard for me to completely accept the bible when there are so many different religious traditions on earth. Hinduism existed for thousands of years as have other religions. Is Christianity more right than them? I think Jesus is awesome and there is a lot of truth in the Bible it just makes me wonder about some kid growing up in a strictly Hindu or other faith family. What if he's never really exposed to Christianity or his original religion is powerful enough in his mind that he doesn't really consider it. Does this mean he is damned or unable to experience the full revelation of God's glory?
-------------------- All drugs should be legal
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akira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ


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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: halo]
#22452071 - 10/30/15 02:14 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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K.Y.E.
it is the key.
you are not this body, you are that which is to become...Holy.
when you tear through the veil, you will become boundless and indefinite and knowledge will be your enemy, because you will find yourself at the center of all things.
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FishOilTheKid
Ascended



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Douglas Howard]
#22452426 - 10/30/15 06:37 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Some of the things that are in the scriptures sounds impossible, but some people had experienced some of these impossibles. The ones that had these experiences tries to explain it to others, but the others do mot believe because they hasn't seen it for themselves.
As someone going through 'impossible things' very routinely I know exactly what you mean about trying to rely THAT to someone else, let alone a doc or psychiatrist in my case. I can open the bible and grasp what is being said here, deny truth there, completely disagree there, then disprove parts otherwise.
I am in touch with angels that have used what I achieved, christ consciousness, to invade my sphere and use it as their own personal mind control paradise. They won't just allow me to be. I think this is cultivated then reflected into their world around me by instilling and reinforcing a judgmental attitude in the population regarding xtianity and its non human representatives.
They claim that the whole of them act as what people consider the God and the Devil. I've been through hell trying to get them to accept that entheogens have their place in religious and world history.
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FishOilTheKid
Ascended



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22452446 - 10/30/15 06:45 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly.
From what I've experienced the bodies energy and the brain can withstand an incredible amount of attack or chaos. Try filling your heart with cold dense energy by puffing it up into a ball with your mind. That has worked for me. Doesn't feel like love or anything just stable and hardened. You can also blow up your chakras like balloons with intent. You can also learn to feed on other people to supplement your own energy.
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PaulyAnna



Registered: 09/01/15
Posts: 200
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22452486 - 10/30/15 07:00 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: . . . I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
From personal experience, taking a 8-10min cold shower has helped me remain grounded when a dark, evil energy tries to overtake me. It's not a long-term fix, but helps immediately.
You can do heart chakra meditation / work to recover the loving energy; it's not hopeless.
-------------------- Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be Whisper words of wisdom, let it be
Edited by PaulyAnna (10/30/15 07:01 AM)
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topsykretts
Stranger


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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: PaulyAnna]
#22494974 - 11/08/15 10:00 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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I feel like I have some sort of energy leakage in my stomach area and my asshole itches a lot. I'm not having butt sex and I take showers. Feels like my energy's all fucked up.
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sprinkles
otd president


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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22494992 - 11/08/15 10:06 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: I ended up in the psych ward. I am not crazy.
im sorry, but that all sounds crazy to me.
ive said before everyone who joins this site is mentally ill so dont feel bad.
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Eggtimer
HotSauce Lover

Registered: 05/04/13
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Douglas Howard]
#22495265 - 11/08/15 11:27 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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The enuma elish is the real history 
Quote:
When in the height heaven was not named, And the earth beneath did not yet bear a name, And the primeval Apsu, who begat them, And chaos, Tiamut, the mother of them both Their waters were mingled together, And no field was formed, no marsh was to be seen; When of the gods none had been called into being, And none bore a name, and no destinies were ordained; Then were created the gods in the midst of heaven, Lahmu and Lahamu were called into being... Ages increased,... Then Ansar and Kisar were created, and over them.... Long were the days, then there came forth..... Anu, their son,... Ansar and Anu... And the god Anu... Nudimmud, whom his fathers, his begetters..... Abounding in all wisdom,...' He was exceeding strong... He had no rival - Thus were established and were... the great gods. But Tiamat and Apsu were still in confusion... They were troubled and... In disorder... Apru was not diminished in might... And Tiamat roared... She smote, and their deeds... Their way was evil... Then Apsu, the begetter of the great gods, Cried unto Mummu, his minister, and said unto him: "O Mummu, thou minister that rejoicest my spirit, Come, unto Tiamut let us go! So they went and before Tiamat they lay down, They consulted on a plan with regard to the gods, their sons. Apsu opened his mouth and spake, And unto Tiamut, the glistening one, he addressed the word: ...their way... By day I can not rest, by night I can not lie down in peace. But I will destroy their way, I will... Let there be lamentation, and let us lie down again in peace." When Tiamat heard these words, She raged and cried aloud... She... grievously..., She uttered a curse, and unto Apsu she spake: "What then shall we do? Let their way be made difficult, and let us lie down again in peace." Mummu answered, and gave counsel unto Apsu, ...and hostile to the gods was the counsel Mummu gave: Come, their way is strong, but thou shalt destroy it; Then by day shalt thou have rest, by night shalt thou lie down in peace." Apsu harkened unto him and his countenance grew bright, Since he (Mummu) planned evil against the gods his sons. ... he was afraid..., His knees became weak; they gave way beneath him, Because of the evil which their first-born had planned. ... their... they altered. ... they..., Lamentation they sat in sorrow
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Douglas Howard
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Eggtimer]
#22508655 - 11/11/15 10:01 AM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Matthew 14:31 Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
Matthew 21:21 Jesus replied, “Truly I tell you, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.
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MarkostheGnostic
Elder



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22511309 - 11/11/15 08:22 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Well, since you are the one proclaiming that you are going "mad," (I do not want to be accused of name calling, ad hominems, or whatever else certain moderators look for to ban me), I would share with you that Schizophrenia does have 'flattened affect' as part of its profile. I can understand you trying to get a handle on your symptoms by placing a chakra model over your experience of a flattening of affect. However, (1) the Anahata chakra is a locus of emotional experience in the Subtle Body, the Sukshma Sarira. It is not the deeper Causal Body, the Karana Sarira, which is the Hindu Hridayam (Heart Cave) or the Catholic Sacred Heart, ostensibly a point where God interfaces with the deepest human experiences of personal love (Christian agapé, which is a disinterested warmth - empathic and compassionate). In both of these models, these loci of experience are not physical organs that whither and die. These are concepts that you hold, images that correspond to emotional experiences, but do not allow yourself become convinced by mere concepts. To do so suggests delusion, like those who become convinced that their bodies are crawling with worms, or snakes, or toads, or whatever. Horrible though the thoughts/images may be, they are delusions of the egoic-mind, not metaphysical realities that only YOU can discern.
(2) According to Christian theology, agapé (the type of love that the New Testament uses, not eros, philia, pragma, ludus, or philautia), is a matter of WILL, NOT feeling. Despite whatever form of 'madness' you may be experiencing, you can still exercise love towards others even if there is a relative absence of feelings occurring at this time. So whereas your ordinary mind is becoming disordered, your higher mind (nous) can potentially continue to practice the virtue of compassionate action. Like some of the 'mad' yogis of ancient Tibet, continuance of the practice of compassion will establish your identity in a deeper, truer identity than the ordinary social and professional identities we all hold in our ordinary mind (like brother, friend, teacher, plumber, church deacon, whatever). This identity is a 'life raft' across the treacherous waters of the unconscious psyche that you seem to be traversing.
Yes, it is well known that psychedelics can thin the barrier between the conscious and unconscious allowing uncontrolled contents from the Shadow (unwanted and therefore suppressed and repressed material) to flood the conscious mind. Devils and angels, along with the entire universal reservoir of mythological creatures, good and evil, belong to our unconscious. So in a real psychological sense, the devil and all his demons do live in the darker areas of ALL of our psyches. In your case, and those who experience 'madness' it is like the movie 'The Gate,' where a hole opens in a kid's backyard which leads to Hell. The film is an apt metaphor for everyone's unconscious so don't beat yourself up (no more self-destructive attempts ). It's not a personal attack by the devil on YOU. That is part of the delusional nature of these cognitive illnesses.
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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withoutlabel
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Regarding the unconscious and how different drugs, traumas, illnesses, etc. can remove one's defences/programming from accessing it, I do wonder what you would say about the concept of a collective unconscious.
Regardless of the appeal that it holds for some to be able to become more aware of their psyche and the world around them, there is a lot of truth about gazing into the abyss will result in it gazing back.
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MarkostheGnostic
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: withoutlabel] 1
#22515663 - 11/12/15 08:27 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
withoutlabel said: Regarding the unconscious and how different drugs, traumas, illnesses, etc. can remove one's defences/programming from accessing it, I do wonder what you would say about the concept of a collective unconscious.
Regardless of the appeal that it holds for some to be able to become more aware of their psyche and the world around them, there is a lot of truth about gazing into the abyss will result in it gazing back.
I had some 8+ years of Jungian analysis with 2 male and one female Zurich-trained Jungian analysts, and I was interviewed (and rejected) by the Inter-Regional Society of Jungian Analysts (rejected ostensibly because I admitted to using psychedelics). I also took the overflow clients from my 2nd analyst in Miami, which I traded for analytical hours, trained with him in Sand Tray, and I trained in the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator under my 1st analyst in grad school, administering and hand-scoring 1000 MBTIs. I have 100 classroom hours of seminars by Jungian analysts, have read extensively, and I've lectured on, and practiced Jungian dream analysis and Active Imagination over the last 30 years as a psychotherapist.
My clinical practice is hypnotherapy but when one works with the unconscious it is useful to be conversant with and aware of archetypal themes that might emerge, but the stuff I typically deal with are psychological and physical symptoms that result from childhood traumas, even if the events no longer appear to be traumatic to my adult clients. Hypnotic trance - somnambulism - is a rapid method for "bypassing the critical faculty" as the late great hypnotherapist Dave Elman put it. I do not attempt to access the collective unconscious but the personal unconscious, which I call the "subconscious." While not correct, strictly speaking, the word suggests a lowering of the analytical mind's defenses rather than a condition of unconsciousness. I have heard surprise from clients saying, "I heard every word you said," because their preconception was that they would become unconscious, wake up, and have been magickally changed. Freud abandoned hypnosis for his method, but I can often remove a phobia, for example) in 2 sessions. Nobody has the money, time, or incentive to undergo extensive and expensive therapies these days.
Today in fact, my client was disappointed because the headaches his physician gave me permission to treat didn't simply vanish with a proverbial snap of the fingers, or, as he demonstrated with a charm on a cord, by the use of a pendulum. No, his headaches I ascertained resulted from resentment against his wife who treated him passive-aggressively, creating a vicious cycle of his resentment towards her which he suppressed, creating somatic symptoms. He was disappointed when I explained that to break the cycle he had to get past his own resentment first and express emotional, and physical affection towards his wife (something he hadn't done in years). She is an unhappy woman, as any woman who is unloved will be, but she will not attend marriage counseling, so he is the one who must initiate a change in the nature of their relationship. He said he'd try the technique but he remained incredulous, calling it "psycho-babble." I said that as he treated her lovingly, she would reciprocate by slowing her passive-aggression, and he would in turn not be driven up the wall by her behaviors and that his suppressed anger and resentment would dissipate along with his headaches.
It is unwise to seek another person's Shadow, and one does not make a fishing expedition into someone's unconscious to see what one can find. I treat symptoms that are the result of emotional 'thorns' or 'barbs' that were 'stuck' into the psyche of a child and which continued to 'fester' under the surface-mind for years or decades. I 'remove the thorn' so-to-speak, and place a healing 'balm' of objective positive affirmations over the 'wound' caused by a painful ego-dystonic lie that had been causing the symptoms. Jungians tend to 'Jungianize' clients just as Freudians 'Freudianize' their clients. All of these stratas exist in the psyche, the collective being perhaps the most interesting thematically, but unfortunately, I have seen it most often in psychotic individuals who have identified with an archetype and have come to believe that they are a messiah, are pursued by some supernatural entities, or who believe themselves a descendent of some supernatural race, the Nephilim for example. Yesterday I received a call from someone (too far away from my location), who wanted to recover memories of his abduction by a UFO. I am reminded of Jung's work Flying Saucers: A Modern Myth of Things Seen in the Skies.
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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Douglas Howard
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MarkostheGnostic
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Douglas Howard]
#22542413 - 11/18/15 03:44 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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And your point is with regard to this subject? Seems like a disconnect, but, I have experienced "ring-like-a-bell-in-the-head" telepathy (Gertrude Schmeidler's expression) some 7 times in my life - on acid and straight. I had a precognitive dream when I was about 14, and when I've been VERY emotionally upset on four occasions, I apparently had an effect on many of the functions of my car's electrical system twice (both when I almost lost my career job several years apart), once on a girlfriend's first trip with me (and I began to sweat profusely) my CD player (which still works 23 years later) began to malfunction, opening and closing randomly on its own (never happened before or since), and when I put my beloved canine friend ben to sleep, the Genie® garage door opener failed to function for 2 days after I brought him home to bury him in the back yard. Then it spontaneously began operating again without reset or anything when my grief began to abate. I would add that after 16 years of maintenance, my pool began to turn green for the first time and no matter what chemicals I added, it would not clear. At the same time I began to get clear signals that my job (the same one as before, only my 28th year in it) was going to be eliminated. As my anxiety developed, the water became more and more opaquely green. Only after I lost my position, and my initial panic subsided, did the water begin to clear (see Dr. Emoto Masaru's work on the 'intelligence' of water) along with my mind. Speaking of Japanese thinking, this reminds me of the Zen relationship some people had with Bonzai trees in Japan. My experiences are certainly not provable to others and neither are they as flamboyant as the ones cited in the video, by the Psi functions do exist. I was actually taught by at Long Island University Parapsychologist/Egyptologist Dr. Bob Brier (who worked with and co-published with 'the Father of Parapsychology,' J.B. Rhine). So you're preachin' to the choir. 
"There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy". - Hamlet (1.5.167-8), Hamlet to Horatio.
-------------------- γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself
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Eclipse3130
Servant of the Fungi



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22543832 - 11/18/15 08:11 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: My problem is that my chakras are too weak to handle the energy coming from them. It's very strange, I am at a point where I have a completely clear view of how to do right action and so on but the more I engage in right action the more it hurts the system of chakras. It's easy for me to control the chakras and abate the insanity from doing so but the more I do it the more it hurts, the more it destroys the chakra system, they aren't strong enough to handle the pressure on them. I doubt this happens to many people at all. I was very foolish not to see the dangers of what I was doing.
For most people if they get this far they are prepared for it and can keep their ego structure intact while doing it but the walls around mine have mostly broken down now. I'm basically a psychopath who is not a psychopath. I feel flat, dead and emotionless other than the emotions that are coming from the chakras, hence its so easy for me to control what the chakras are doing.
Pretty sure a teacher can't help me, I'm just writing this as a warning really. Just to warn that if you are getting serious pains from psychedelics and spiritual seeking you need to stop doing that right away and go much more slowly. Serious seeking can be truly dangerous. The whole so called spiritual thing is actually governed by physical laws written into the universe that your chakra system is built to respond to and be strengthened by actions. If you destroy those chakras through drug use I think you are in very grave danger.
If it is true that your body is reconstituted in a kind of hell realm between births and deaths, which I think it is. All religions have said it is and IMO they must be based on something real considering they are so similar and also because I see how these chakras work so clearly now. Then the chakras must be kept healthy otherwise you will sink deeper and deeper into hell. I actually don't feel that crazy at all right now, there are no voices or psychosis of any kind, I never expected to come to these conclusions at all. I just know that once the chakras are destroyed all my blocks against it will be gone, forever. It's shit that it's like this 
Of course you will all think that this is the talking of a deluded fool.
Honestly it sounds like you experienced an opening of the chakras for the first time, and you are mistaking hurt with feeling them
-------------------- "In The Material World One seeks retirement and grows Old In The Magical World One seeks Enlightenment and grows Wiser In The Miraculous World One seeks nothing and grows Lighter As we all tread the Homeward Path we will explore many Realms And one day... we will all Realize that all experiences are Simply Different ways in which The All-That Is Perceives Itself"
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Goose
Student of life



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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Eclipse3130]
#22548997 - 11/19/15 09:19 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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hey man ive had it happen to me too. keep your hart pure you can regain your mind. ive done it. if you want to talk more send me a pm
-------------------- "i will study and prepare myself so that when my opportunity comes i will be ready" Abraham Lincoln
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