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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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My story - god and the devil are real
#22438556 - 10/27/15 12:59 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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Arctic W. Fox

Registered: 09/23/14
Posts: 1,357
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22438586 - 10/27/15 01:13 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group



Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Arctic W. Fox] 1
#22438624 - 10/27/15 01:28 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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*Tangent Alert*
I would like to read that, but I still have 18 years left on my 23 year ban from that forum solely for posting a Vernon Howard quote. Perhaps by the time I am dead the "spiritually advanced" moderators will give me a pardon.
Not one other member in the history of this website has been treated with such spite.
As to the OP, convincing yourself is not the same as convincing others. Many people believe weird shit. Are you not going to present even a single dollop of evidence? If not, then what is there to discuss?
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Hippocampus



Registered: 04/01/15
Posts: 753
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22438766 - 10/27/15 02:53 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Occham's Razor; you are just crazy. Now, other than your feelings, can you provide us with any more evidence for your argument?
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Grapefruit
Freak in the forest


Registered: 05/09/08
Posts: 5,744
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Hippocampus]
#22438858 - 10/27/15 04:03 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Is logic really the only reality to you guys?
-------------------- Little left in the way of energy; or the way of love, yet happy to entertain myself playing mental games with the rest of you freaks until the rivers run backwards. "Chat your fraff Chat your fraff Just chat your fraff Chat your fraff"
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cez

Registered: 08/04/09
Posts: 5,854
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439383 - 10/27/15 09:20 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: Is logic really the only reality to you guys?
No, but you're fear-mongering delusions aren't going to alter my views.
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zzripz
Stranger


Registered: 12/23/08
Posts: 8,292
Loc: Manchester, UK
Last seen: 4 years, 7 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439507 - 10/27/15 09:59 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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There would be questions I'd want to ask you: You say you've taken psychedelics for some time. And 'in the midst of' doing so you have severe chest pain? What kind of psychedelics were you taking? How often, and what average dosage?
What kind of food and liquids do you ingest?
Do you get exercise?
You seem to be suggesting that your chest pain is the 'overload of your heart chakra'? What do you mean?
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Quote:
OrgoneConclusion said: *Tangent Alert*
I would like to read that, but I still have 18 years left on my 23 year ban from that forum solely for posting a Vernon Howard quote. Perhaps by the time I am dead the "spiritually advanced" moderators will give me a pardon.
Not one other member in the history of this website has been treated with such spite.
As to the OP, convincing yourself is not the same as convincing others. Many people believe weird shit. Are you not going to present even a single dollop of evidence? If not, then what is there to discuss?
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group



Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: LunarEclipse]
#22439621 - 10/27/15 10:31 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Don't make me post a photo of Adrienne!
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OrgoneConclusion
Blue Fish Group



Registered: 04/01/07
Posts: 45,414
Loc: Under the C
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: cez]
#22439628 - 10/27/15 10:33 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
cez said:
Quote:
Grapefruit said: Is logic really the only reality to you guys?
No, but you're fear-mongering delusions aren't going to alter my views.
But that's how religion works.
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Rahz
Alive Again



Registered: 11/10/05
Posts: 9,230
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22439963 - 10/27/15 12:06 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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I understand.
I agree one should be very careful of psychedelic drug use and spiritual awakening but the fool hardy will remain fool hardy and recreational users will remain recreational users. In the words of Charlie Daniel "Some things you gotta find out for yourself, cause there's some things in this world you just can't explain."
Your chakra is not "destroyed". You have a couple years recovery time in my estimation, perhaps less perhaps more. Some people who have similar experience have been much worse off than you, (imagine if what happened to your heart happened to your head) to the point of needing care for basic functions and took over a decade to recover.
The heart is un-hurt. Best of luck to you, keep your wits. You are not crazy, but I would suggest keeping in mind the lesson you have learned. Pathological narcissism can manifest as religious fervor.
Quote:
Grapefruit said: I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
-------------------- rahz comfort pleasure power love truth awareness peace "You’re not looking close enough if you can only see yourself in people who look like you." —Ayishat Akanbi
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LunarEclipse
Enlil's Official Story


Registered: 10/31/04
Posts: 21,407
Loc: Building 7
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Quote:
OrgoneConclusion said: Don't make me post a photo of Adrienne! 
-------------------- Anxiety is what you make it.
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fivepointer
newbie
Registered: 08/03/02
Posts: 1,428
Last seen: 7 years, 2 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22444037 - 10/28/15 09:31 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
You are making stuff up in a trip and treating it like it is a fact. It is called a delusion. Get a grip.
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BlueCoyote
Beyond


Registered: 05/07/04
Posts: 6,697
Loc: Between
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22444358 - 10/28/15 11:10 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Grapefruit, I hear you. But all you will say are those things the wise men have said before already and still there are those who 'can not hear' or 'have no ears to hear'. Glad you were shown the brighter side though. I wish you all the best for recovery and rationalization of what happened to you. You can help us explain g*d and da duvul later
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enlightened seed
Utopia is a state of mind



Registered: 05/04/07
Posts: 2,117
Loc: amongst civilization
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: BlueCoyote]
#22467637 - 11/02/15 05:49 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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psychedelics are not for everyone. besides if you ask a hundred different people their definition of god, you might receive a hundred different answers. i do not care to elaborate on god, the devil, hell, and heaven as i think it is all b.s. but people are allowed to think whatever they want to.
Edited by enlightened seed (11/02/15 05:55 PM)
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usulpsychonaut


Registered: 05/12/08
Posts: 2,814
Loc: Northland, New Zealand.
Last seen: 2 years, 2 months
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22472278 - 11/03/15 05:39 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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What is the point? Hell is inevitable, there is no way around that. We are all going down there according to religions.
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hTx
(:



Registered: 03/27/13
Posts: 5,724
Loc: Space-time
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Re: My story - god and the devil are real [Re: Grapefruit]
#22472763 - 11/03/15 07:08 PM (8 years, 2 months ago) |
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Quote:
Grapefruit said: I have been taking psychedelics looking for a spiritual awakening for some time. I have done this in the midst of sever chest pain, I was a narcissist. I finally did pass the "first step" of awakening using intellect and psychedelics. Since then I hav felt complete overload of my heart chakra, I tried to kill myself but it failed and I ended up in the psych ward. Now the chakra is destroyed nearly completely, I am shaking and the more it gets destroyed the more I feel love withering away in me and satanic thoughts and feeling overcoming me, they are truly dark, darker than any normal case of psychosis. I was a pathological narcissist and this kind of thing was not meant for me.
I am convinced now, having only 2 month a go been an atheist that god and the devil and hell and heaven are real. You must seek God but be very careful of psychedelic drugs and spiritual awakening, they can destroy your chakras if you have not strengthened them properly. I am writing this as a warning, do not laugh it off, I am not crazy. I am certain the religions have truth to them now and this is not based on delusions but just my experience. Hell is real, there is a reason that great men such as socrates or buddha or jesus believed this. Connection to God, or love is to found in your heart chakra. Be very careful with psychedelics, they can destroy your life completely.
I've been where you've been, the love withering away, the shaking...the terrible synchronicities. The dark night of the soul. Mine was First brought on by, like you say, the use of psychedelics and seeking intellectual (8 circuit model was my inspiration and guide) awakening.
It took me awhile to figure things out...after my first profound spiritual trip, and my subsequent fall from grace (literally perceived as reincarnating as everything through evolution up to and past human consciousness, and falling into a black hole) due to fear, I was completely mind-blown by the things I would occasionally perceive after this experience.
the perception would come suddenly, frightening and completely disorientating me...after-all it is tough to think logically while afraid and in unknown territory. After awhile of this happening (I didnt tell a soul, I would just bear witness and occasionally have a panic attack) I began to lose my fear of the negative occurrences and started taking notes, eventually I learned how to hold my own in that territory, to become a better person, learned how to roll with the punches, to counter-attack with love. You will learn as well, safe travels my brethren.
-------------------- zen by age ten times six hundred lifetimes Light up the darkness.
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