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SmokeIfUGottem
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Registered: 07/02/15
Posts: 4
Last seen: 8 years, 14 days
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Well that was crazy. 7g of penis envy
#22337549 - 10/05/15 04:24 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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So I have been growing mushies for two months or so now. I have been eating psychedelic's for over 15 years and I have never let myself go to the edges with it. I have been wanting to try the "heroic dose" for quite awhile so the other night I ate 7 grams of penis envy (anything worth doing is worth doing right). This is the best I will be able to explain my experience.
Setting. Alone in my living room. Eventually laying in bed with my girlfriend.
Hour 1 Normal effects thus far. Trippy fractals, sensitivity to light and sound.
Hour 2 a feeling I have never noticed before starts to happen. I start to feel as if I'm in between the normal 3 dimensions of reality. It was a smooth and natural thing but I have a really hard time explaining it. Time dilation is in full swing. I was probably moving in slow motion.
Hour 3+ Complete loss of time and ego death occurs. At first I get stuck in a loop. This has never happened to me before and it kinda scared me. I perceived it a schizophrenia and thought maybe I pushed it to far and this is how people loose their shit on psychedelic's. At some point I end up in bed next to my gf. I could feel the loop taking me away and I was telling my gf to wake up and come with me. I was worried I would get lost in my head and never find my way back again. I did get lost in this and I perceived it to last for an eternity (figuratively). I would say it was something close to purgatory in my mind. Very unpleasant and hard to deal with
I loose memory for a bit and then come to the realization that I may be dead and this is why I can not explain this loop I am in. That maybe I died and didn't realize it. That my whole life was actually that time you hear people talking about when your "life flashes before your eyes". I spent a while considering that maybe I was a ghost haunting my house and did indeed believe I was at the time.
I finally gave into the fact or possibility that I died and laid down next to my gf and she rolled over and held me. I then had what I could only describe as a total obe followed by rebirth. I felt like I was pulled to the outer reaches of the universe. It was so small and I was infinitely large. I could feel an energy flowing through my body in the form of a sound that seemed to be all encompassing. It was the loudest thing I ever heard but it was what everything came from. Seriously it was so fucking powerful. I had a glimpse of myself during this time and was blown away at how small I was compared to this. I will never forget that sound. I loose time again for awhile and then I am awake. Full consciousness. It was like I came out of it in an instant. I had some waviness in my vision but I was sitting on my couch again trembling from what just happened.
I will not say this was a bad trip although some aspects were hellish to say the least. I am still a little unsure about the whole thing. It was so unlike anything that happened to me before that I haven't been able to totally wrap my head around it. I felt old when I was done. Like I had been gone for eons. Mind blown.
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theshrumnub
God



Registered: 09/02/15
Posts: 740
Loc: florida
Last seen: 8 months, 3 days
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Re: Well that was crazy. 7g of penis envy [Re: SmokeIfUGottem] 1
#22337618 - 10/05/15 04:45 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Cool report 
For the time loops I have a sheet of paper and marker ready. Writing ALWAYS broke the loop and was a great connection to reality. Try it next time you trip!
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 21 days, 19 hours
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Re: Well that was crazy. 7g of penis envy [Re: theshrumnub]
#22337670 - 10/05/15 05:02 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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What was your goal in eating such a heavy dose? Were you seeking something specifically or just curious what would happen if you ate that many?
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SmokeIfUGottem
Stranger
Registered: 07/02/15
Posts: 4
Last seen: 8 years, 14 days
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-Good advice on the note taking.
- I didn't have a specific goal per se. I was more interested in the experience more than anything. I wanted to see the farthest reaches of my mind and the true potential of the mushroom. It left me with many questions that I will consider for my next time. This was specifically a "recon" mission of sorts for me.
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 21 days, 19 hours
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Re: Well that was crazy. 7g of penis envy [Re: SmokeIfUGottem]
#22340353 - 10/06/15 09:51 AM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Had you worked with high doses before? If so, what weight? Also, what do you plan for future trips after this one? When do you think you'll venture next and how deep will you aim to go? Did you accomplish what you were going for?
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SmokeIfUGottem
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Registered: 07/02/15
Posts: 4
Last seen: 8 years, 14 days
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Maybe 12-13 years ago in Amsterdam I took a particularly potent dose of mushrooms. That was not intentional and it rocked my world. Like I aid I always wanted to see what would happen if I took an intentionally large dose. Some interesting things to note this far. I have had zero desire for cannabis or alcohol which I find kinda odd. To finish answering your question... I will take a dose like that again. I will wait for a time I feel appropriate within the next weeks, months. I think I had a hard time letting go of my ego and I would like to revisit that. I am also held captive by that sound. I can hear it everywhere now. Ps. Another side note. I have been able to lucid dream since before I even knew what it was. Well technically I think it's astral projection but something about that term makes it sound so damn hokey. Anyway. My lucid dreams have skyrocketed over the last couple days. I mean like two or three a night. It's like I have gained some kinda control over this. It use to be something that was random but the last nights. Whoa.
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TheScientificMethod
Psychonautic Explorer & Writer



Registered: 02/20/14
Posts: 632
Loc: USA
Last seen: 21 days, 19 hours
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Re: Well that was crazy. 7g of penis envy [Re: SmokeIfUGottem]
#22345528 - 10/07/15 01:43 PM (8 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thank you for your response. A lot of what you've said resonates with me personally. I too stopped smoking and drinking after my first heavy experience with LSD. I have also quit smoking weed recently following a series of 14 psychedelic journeys that I took while hiking the Pacific Crest Trail. It became a major reset for me and I just no longer feel the need to be stoned all the time like I used to.
Thank you for sharing your journey. It makes me curious to have another deep one. It's been almost 10 months since my 6g silent darkness trip.
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