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OfflineMacey Howard
Formally MOE HOWARD
Female


Registered: 07/02/99
Posts: 14,165
Loc: Georgia Flag
Last seen: 7 years, 4 months
And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples * 3
    #22318449 - 10/01/15 10:36 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Here we go!

I'm in big lots shopping my ass off because they had a sale trying to dump all their summer shit.
I'm wading my way thru people hoarding 2 shopping carts full of sale items.

I walk down one aisle and catch a girl shuffling loads of merchandise down her bra. She looks up at me, and resumes the theft. I turn around to get the bath towels I was eying and the girl told me that I had big enough boobs to hide them and walk out.

I just said "oh, ok" and moved on. God damn.

I go to the electronics section and there are 3 guys wearing headphones that appeared to be spanking new. The opened packaging was still in the vicinity. Christ.

*My mental trumpets blaring* Enters a lady with a dump truck gut and two tons of butt. She walked gracefully through the aisles munching on merchandise that obviously wasn't paid for. I swear to god I was going to pull the fire alarm pull station because her legs rubbed down past her knees. I wanted to put a fire extinguisher on a gold chain and give it to her as a gift.

If she saw a Golden Corral sign her pants would catch fire from her running.

She was sooooo faaaaaaaat.

She was so fat, all I could do was pray for her.

Bitch had back titties. Ok. Ok. That's enough. ---
-----
She left a trail of water when she walked because her shoes were crying.

Ok. That's enough. I promise.

So her Jr fat son looks at this inflatable kiddie pool thing.

Yells:  MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples. Why does boys got dem? Is I gonna have babies like you?

The whole store stopped. I heard people dropping shit while laughing.

It's time for me to stop visiting shit hole parts of town to save a buck.


--------------------
Hugs and Kisses!


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InvisibleLobsterSauceDiscord
 User Gallery

Registered: 11/09/08
Posts: 19,884
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Macey Howard]
    #22318509 - 10/01/15 10:48 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Macey Howard said:
Here we go!

I'm in big lots shopping my ass off because they had a sale trying to dump all their summer shit.
I'm wading my way thru people hoarding 2 shopping carts full of sale items.

I walk down one aisle and catch a girl shuffling loads of merchandise down her bra. She looks up at me, and resumes the theft. I turn around to get the bath towels I was eying and the girl told me that I had big enough boobs to hide them and walk out.

I just said "oh, ok" and moved on. God damn.

I go to the electronics section and there are 3 guys wearing headphones that appeared to be spanking new. The opened packaging was still in the vicinity. Christ.

*My mental trumpets blaring* Enters a lady with a dump truck gut and two tons of butt. She walked gracefully through the aisles munching on merchandise that obviously wasn't paid for. I swear to god I was going to pull the fire alarm pull station because her legs rubbed down past her knees. I wanted to put a fire extinguisher on a gold chain and give it to her as a gift.

If she saw a Golden Corral sign her pants would catch fire from her running.

She was sooooo faaaaaaaat.

She was so fat, all I could do was pray for her.

Bitch had back titties. Ok. Ok. That's enough. ---
-----
She left a trail of water when she walked because her shoes were crying.

Ok. That's enough. I promise.

So her Jr fat son looks at this inflatable kiddie pool thing.

Yells:  MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples. Why does boys got dem? Is I gonna have babies like you?

The whole store stopped. I heard people dropping shit while laughing.

It's time for me to stop visiting shit hole parts of town to save a buck.




Haha, I would love to see something like that.

Was this in malwart by any chance?


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OfflinePabloSumgie
Stranger

Registered: 08/20/15
Posts: 84
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: LobsterSauce]
    #22318611 - 10/01/15 11:08 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

This isn't funny per say but I took my girlfriend to a nice restaurant once and were sitting there eating talking and a couple with there young son(like 5-6) come in and sit down. They order and were all just doing our own thing. Halfway through there meal the kid stands up on his chair and just yells MOMMY I COULD MURDER MYSELF RIGHT NOW. Whole restaurant quite. Just like WTF. The weirdest thing I've ever seen a kid do. Like creepy weird. Just thought Id throw that in there.


--------------------
Alright then, picture this if you will:
10 to 2 AM, X, Yogi DMT, and a box of Krispy Kremes, in my "need to know" post, just outside of Area 51.
Contemplating the whole "chosen people" thing with just a flaming stealth banana split the sky like one would hope but never really expect to see in a place like this.
Cutting right angle donuts on a dime and stopping right at my Birkenstocks, and me yelping...
Holy fucking shit!


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Invisiblememes
Blessed


Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Macey Howard]
    #22318615 - 10/01/15 11:09 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

thank you so much for all that Macey.



please, i'll eat that shit up any time you wanna throw it out there


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InvisibleLe_Canard
The Duk Abides


Registered: 05/16/03
Posts: 94,392
Loc: Earthfarm 1 Flag
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Macey Howard]
    #22318663 - 10/01/15 11:21 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

:lol: You're braver than I, going into Walmart like you do.


Edited by Le_Canard (10/01/15 10:11 PM)


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InvisibleOhMrJohnson
Ashes Against The Grain

Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 17,544
Loc: Terra Incognita Flag
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Macey Howard]
    #22318752 - 10/01/15 11:40 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Your stories are always so awesome


--------------------

Diminish the sub-principle and leave its toxic trace..
Once and for all!


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OfflineAchillita
Back to the basics
Male


Registered: 05/26/14
Posts: 4,565
Last seen: 3 years, 10 days
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: OhMrJohnson]
    #22318769 - 10/01/15 11:44 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

:lol: My nephew thought his nipppes were "boo-boos" and made my mom put bandaids on them so he'd be happy.

These are questions kids gotta know :shrug:


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InvisiblePanda89
Kung fu panda
Male User Gallery

Registered: 11/12/14
Posts: 97
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Achillita]
    #22319803 - 10/01/15 03:58 PM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Rofl thank you for the laugh.


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OfflineReposadoXochipilli
Here, there, inbetween
Male User Gallery


Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 7,501
Loc: Sand and sunshine
Last seen: 19 days, 22 hours
Re: And then the Kid yells: MaMa.... I don't umberstand my titty nipples [Re: Achillita]
    #22320072 - 10/01/15 05:11 PM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Achillita said:
:lol: My nephew thought his nipppes were "boo-boos" and made my mom put bandaids on them so he'd be happy.

These are questions kids gotta know :shrug:





some one was kissing momma's boo boo's to make em feel better har  har


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