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OnlineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
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Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to
    #22283764 - 09/24/15 12:50 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Giving ma sperm to the bank to hold on to. They're preppin the room for me now :naughty:

Weird coincidence I used to work with the girl who is collecting my sperm, at a completely different job years ago


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 26 minutes, 30 seconds
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22283774 - 09/24/15 12:52 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Ask for help.



--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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OfflineDilsnique
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Registered: 04/22/14
Posts: 3,800
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22283780 - 09/24/15 12:53 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Ask her to assist you in your specimen collecting

Dammit Shroomslip, you too quick on the draw


Edited by Dilsnique (09/24/15 12:53 PM)


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OfflineLuSiD enthusiast
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Registered: 03/14/13
Posts: 4,325
Last seen: 4 years, 9 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH] * 1
    #22283797 - 09/24/15 12:56 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

mick said:
Giving ma sperm to the bank to hold on to. They're preppin the room for me now :naughty:

Weird coincidence I used to work with the girl who is collecting my sperm, at a completely different job years ago



Did she collect your sperm years ago when you knew her?:naughty:

Wait :itsatrap:, she may be collecting it for a dna test if she did years ago and might be trying to get you to father some bastard kid. Tread carefully op.

Also how is there no graemlin of admiral ackbar saying "ITS A TRAP".I need to figure out how to make them or a gif of it, this site could use more star wars graems. (am i using the term graemlin correctly here? )


--------------------
I'm addicted to coke, weed, booze, ludes and speed.
Not LSD, you can't get addicted to LSD, it was built by scientists.

I ain't got no demons that gonna get woke.


In erowid we trust.

Just take your damn pills and don't ask any questions, you'll be fine.


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OfflineReposadoXochipilli
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Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 7,501
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: LuSiD enthusiast]
    #22284059 - 09/24/15 01:50 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

there used to be an its a trap one but they rotate through them as they get stale i think.


cum, the spice of life.


--------------------


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OfflineEnvix
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Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 18,206
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22284071 - 09/24/15 01:53 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

i can see you're living the life, mick. how's the rest of your week been goin?


--------------------
smack a hoe out this dimension
continue my ascension
-bhad bhabie

rip. todcasil, acid sloth, st1llnox, zappaisgod, big worm (sketch), tim b


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InvisibleCapers
Man About Town
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Registered: 08/15/10
Posts: 16,199
Loc: United States Flag
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22284284 - 09/24/15 02:41 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

How do they decide that you're worthy to donate sperm? Do the women choosing which donor they want get to know all the details about the donor?


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InvisibleSheekle
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Capers]
    #22284291 - 09/24/15 02:42 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Capers said:
How do they decide that you're worthy to donate sperm? Do the women choosing which donor they want get to know all the details about the donor?



u have to have a certain level of qualifications nd stuff


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Capers]
    #22284293 - 09/24/15 02:43 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

They have it on a system that judges it by consistency. It ranges from milk to uncooked scrambled eggs. The more gloopy, the more potent.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleCapers
Man About Town
Male

Registered: 08/15/10
Posts: 16,199
Loc: United States Flag
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22284311 - 09/24/15 02:45 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yeah, but don't the women seek out the best physical and mental qualities in male donors? Potency of the semen aside, do the ladies get information on the donors' job, education, looks, height, weight, etc.?


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22284322 - 09/24/15 02:48 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

tell her you have arthritis in your hands and you require her medical assistance


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Registered: 01/11/10
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Capers]
    #22284515 - 09/24/15 03:39 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

you must pass a ton of criteria to donate sperm in the first place, im pretty sure its anonymouse from there though


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Sheekle] * 1
    #22284522 - 09/24/15 03:41 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Did you get any help OP?


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OfflineGorlax
Male


Registered: 05/06/08
Posts: 6,695
Last seen: 16 days, 18 hours
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Sheekle]
    #22284576 - 09/24/15 03:59 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yeah you have to be qualified first. Most only allow college educate males. You have to pass multiple physicals and exams and they can choose exactly who they want to pick based on characteristics given. It's not like they just have a baby with random jizz lmao. That could end up with a black baby like that lesbian couple haha


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OnlineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,741
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Gorlax]
    #22286302 - 09/24/15 10:07 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

i had to sign all this paperwork but didnt really read it so yeah maybe theyre gonna give my sperm to a bunch of different people. thats weird thinking that i could have a random kid out there who is best friends with gorlaxes future son. and no she didnt help haha. actually it kinda sucks u have to rub one out dry to not get other fluids in the cup. no spit, nothing. have u ever jerked it dry? not especially comfortable

the sperm is supppposda be for my wife. Im just loading up the vault for her


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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OnlineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,741
Last seen: 7 minutes, 20 seconds
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Envix]
    #22286307 - 09/24/15 10:08 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Envix said:
i can see you're living the life, mick. how's the rest of your week been goin?




going great my good sir how about you?


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: ManianFH]
    #22286405 - 09/24/15 10:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

mick said:
i had to sign all this paperwork but didnt really read it so yeah maybe theyre gonna give my sperm to a bunch of different people. thats weird thinking that i could have a random kid out there who is best friends with gorlaxes future son. and no she didnt help haha. actually it kinda sucks u have to rub one out dry to not get other fluids in the cup. no spit, nothing. have u ever jerked it dry? not especially comfortable

the sperm is supppposda be for my wife. Im just loading up the vault for her




Wait, no lube? I bet that burns :eek:


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #22286421 - 09/24/15 10:35 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

How do people have trouble jerking it with no lube?


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleSheekle
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22286442 - 09/24/15 10:39 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Unless you're uncircumcised it seems pretty hard unless you want to trash your skin


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
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Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Sheekle]
    #22286449 - 09/24/15 10:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I am circumcised, I do it all the time with no ill-effects.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleSheekle
FREE BURKE
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22286476 - 09/24/15 10:51 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Shroomslip said:
I am circumcised, I do it all the time with no ill-effects.



ur dick skin must be stretchy as fuck


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 26 minutes, 30 seconds
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Sheekle]
    #22286500 - 09/24/15 10:57 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

It moves but not really anymore than what seems normal (judging by porn as that's the only real frame of reference I have). If you sit there rubbing on the head and shit, yeah it's gonna hurt like a mother fucker, but that's not the only way to do it. Maybe I should write up a tek on it :lol:.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22286516 - 09/24/15 11:00 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

so why not use lube? does no lube feel better to you? Or you just are used to going lubeless? Im Intrigued :lol:


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OfflineQuit The Cult
World is yours

Registered: 11/12/14
Posts: 265
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #22286543 - 09/24/15 11:07 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Shroomslip i dont need lube to jerk it either. I prefer not using lube to be honest. :feelsgoodbro:

Borderline homo thread and post.


--------------------
Ill always have typos. Using a shitty phone to write on here.


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 26 minutes, 30 seconds
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #22286560 - 09/24/15 11:13 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'm probably thinking way too much into this shit right now lol. Looks kinda weird for me to break it down like this.

I do sometimes, sometimes I don't want to deal with the mess, sometimes I'm just in a hurry and trying to beat myself to sleep. Sometimes I'm just bored and "taking things slow". Sometimes it's just not convenient like when I'm bored in the middle of the night and my wife is sleeping on the bed like 5 feet from me. I'm not gonna go waking her up just because I'm feeling aroused when she has to go to work in a few hours.

As for the difference in feeling, it's just different. It doesn't necessarily feel better or worse with or without lube. They both have trade offs. IME long sessions with lube and vigorous head stimulation tends to leave it feeling kind of sore, not long term, just until stimulation stops, but initial pleasure is heightened. Without lube there is less initial pleasure but actual climax seems to feel stronger and give more of an endorphin/dopamine rush since you hadn't been feeling as strong of pleasure and became "used" to it. The higher the average pleasure the lower the difference of climax actually seems.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleJvF
Fletcher Detcher


Registered: 02/13/14
Posts: 2,662
Loc: Chicago Flag
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22286581 - 09/24/15 11:23 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Jerking off with no lube is where its at

Youll last longer in bed, and your skin will be rougher, for her pleasure :wink:

Seriosuly though, after a week it wont hurt anymore and youll last alot longer. Im a big advocate for jerking without lotion/lube

Definitely stay at the head as well, its the only way he skin will get rough and leathery


--------------------


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22286586 - 09/24/15 11:25 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Huh.

...

...Its on my to do list now :lol::thumbup:


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Offlinexbloodwhipx

Registered: 02/24/12
Posts: 12,791
Last seen: 4 years, 5 months
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: JvF]
    #22286589 - 09/24/15 11:26 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

jfischer218 said:
Definitely stay at the head as well, its the only way he skin will get rough and leathery



:awedisgust:


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InvisibleJvF
Fletcher Detcher


Registered: 02/13/14
Posts: 2,662
Loc: Chicago Flag
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: xbloodwhipx]
    #22286594 - 09/24/15 11:26 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

xbloodwhipx said:
Quote:

jfischer218 said:
Definitely stay at the head as well, its the only way he skin will get rough and leathery



:awedisgust:



:penis:


--------------------


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OnlineManianFHS
living in perverty
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Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 14,741
Last seen: 7 minutes, 20 seconds
Re: Waiting in line to jizzn a cup, what r u up to [Re: JvF]
    #22294477 - 09/26/15 04:27 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

haha that is a crazy argument for no lube masturbation, and not a bad one.


but im alllll about the sloppiest lube i can get. the slippier the better ohhh yeha.


--------------------
notapillow said: "you are going about this endeavor all wrong. clear your mind of useless fear and concern. buy the ticket, take the ride, and all that.... "

ChrisWho said: "It's all about the journey, not the destination."


Edited by ManianFH (09/26/15 04:27 PM)


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