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Sade
Cheatin bastered



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 729
Loc: Bigfoot Territory
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do?
#22280066 - 09/23/15 06:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Ok so we have two people we live with in like a trailer park on a big piece of land. Everyone there is family. However two people husband and wife have a horrible meth addiction. They stay up for like 4 days in a row doing tweeker shit all over the place. They don't feed their kids when they say they are starving. We have to feed them. The grandma owns the property but when she did threaten to kick them out they said she would never see her grandkids again. Chances are they will lose them anyway. They drive all of us insane. They even accuse other people of being tweekers but not them. I really find that funny. Actually the sister called him a tweeker once and he lost it. They accuse us of steeling their food which is bullshit. Honestly it is probably from feeding their kids. It is my gfs family and I love her so much but can't stand to live there and will take some time to move us both out. What should I do guys? It is almost about to put me in a hospital I get so depressed about it.
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Psilosopherr
A psilly goose



Registered: 02/15/12
Posts: 12,278
Last seen: 1 month, 10 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Sade]
#22280104 - 09/23/15 06:41 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Maybe one of you should try to get custody. research how the law works if you call CPS to make it work out for the kids?
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Sade
Cheatin bastered



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 729
Loc: Bigfoot Territory
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Psilosopherr]
#22281750 - 09/23/15 11:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Thanks man. May sound retarded but I am trying to make this family come together and eork out. I don't think that will happen soon though.
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Giftofdeprivation
Discerning Vagrant



Registered: 07/20/13
Posts: 3,933
Last seen: 8 years, 28 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Sade]
#22281773 - 09/23/15 11:43 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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You aren't going to change much and are probably better off not getting wrapped up in their drama. Focus on saving your money to move to a better place?
CPS seems like the decent thing, but idk, I think that leads to useless infractions that puts them in harder places (because they aren't going to choose their kids over the drugs, trust me). Best case, it sounds like the kids get foster parents (it's a fucking lottery, but it's always difficult on any child).
All I think is that more people breed in this world than what really needs to happen, but that's not very constructive 
My perspective is selfish: If you get caught up on their BS, you're going to be held back. We breed like rats for a reason; let them suffer and climb to the top of the pile while you can.
--------------------
Looking for recipes? Have some recipes to share? Please post what you have in the official cooking thread for Pubbers! HERE! Shoutout to Azur's Official cooking thread for OTDers! Posters Beware!
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Psilosopherr
A psilly goose



Registered: 02/15/12
Posts: 12,278
Last seen: 1 month, 10 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Giftofdeprivation]
#22282881 - 09/24/15 09:39 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Giftofdeprivation said: You aren't going to change much and are probably better off not getting wrapped up in their drama. Focus on saving your money to move to a better place?
CPS seems like the decent thing, but idk, I think that leads to useless infractions that puts them in harder places (because they aren't going to choose their kids over the drugs, trust me). Best case, it sounds like the kids get foster parents (it's a fucking lottery, but it's always difficult on any child).
All I think is that more people breed in this world than what really needs to happen, but that's not very constructive 
My perspective is selfish: If you get caught up on their BS, you're going to be held back. We breed like rats for a reason; let them suffer and climb to the top of the pile while you can.
yeah calling CPS seems like tricky business.
I was kind of assuming that the grandparents would be willing to adopt them if the parents are THAT bad. I wouldn't think his family would sit by and say "not my problem" while the kids got stuck with foster parents.
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once in a lifetime
sun child



Registered: 02/12/15
Posts: 1,807
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Psilosopherr]
#22282965 - 09/24/15 09:57 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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How old are the kids & how many of them?
just trying to get a little more info.
Very tough situation it sounds like -
Stay strong, is my advice. . conserve your strength & energy. .
Meditate & rest in walking when u can, to do that,
& then stay alert to whatever may be the right course of action,
and when it is the right time to do something - whatever that may be -
you'll have the restfulness, alertness, & energy to do so;
and whatever it is right to do, have full self-faith -
don't let anyone or anything erode that
sending you lots of thoughts of strength friend,
may it all work out for the best. . .
again in a situation like that - keep your strength,
& self-faith, be mindful & aware -
of your energy, health & strength. . keep your heart safe, etc
and so forth - again sending you lots of strength. . .
keep your h'art / mind in a good shelter & take the time you need!
wishing u the very best;
jake.
-------------------- Innocent, Oldfield & Hegerland Julia Delaney, Bothy Band Rasta Girl, Sister Carol Genesis, Jorma K I Wish You Peace, Lawrence Laughing Do Your Thing, Moondog large . . music garden . . veryall peace them hiStarhouse - main Time Traveler's Guide
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once in a lifetime
sun child



Registered: 02/12/15
Posts: 1,807
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: once in a lifetime]
#22282997 - 09/24/15 10:03 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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doubled i guess
Stay strong, is my advice. . conserve your strength & energy. . Meditate & rest in walking when u can, to do that, & then stay alert to whatever may be the right course of action, and when it is the right time to do something - whatever that may be -
you'll have the restfulness, alertness, & energy to do so; and whatever it is right to do, have full self-faith - don't let anyone or anything erode that sending you lots of thoughts of strength friend, may it all work out for the best. . .
again in a situation like that - keep your strength, & self-faith, be mindful & aware - of your energy, health & strength. . keep your heart safe, etc and so forth - again sending you lots of strength. . . keep your h'art / mind in a good shelter & take the time you need!
wishing u the very best; jake.
once again lots of support from your Shroomery!
doin' good it sounds like, keep up your best. . gotta be our best when the times call for it - very sincerely -
your friend.
-------------------- Innocent, Oldfield & Hegerland Julia Delaney, Bothy Band Rasta Girl, Sister Carol Genesis, Jorma K I Wish You Peace, Lawrence Laughing Do Your Thing, Moondog large . . music garden . . veryall peace them hiStarhouse - main Time Traveler's Guide
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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy



Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: once in a lifetime] 1
#22284000 - 09/24/15 01:39 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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I am an ex meth addict and there is no way you are gonna be able to change them. Unless you have something better then the rush that meth gives them (which is very unlikely) they will never change their ways.
People only change once they find something that is so important they are not willing to give it up for a rush, no matter how epic it is. Usually these dead beat poorer people honestly have nothing better to look forward to then the rush. I don't blame them. Nothing an NA class offers is gonna excite them in comparison to the drug.
There comes a time when you really do lose yourself in the drug and your sole is stolen and never to be returned. Even if you do get sober you are just a shell of your old self.
That takes years to happen but I have seen it. If you have ever looked into a chronic tweakers eyes when they are sober all you can see is emptiness and no sparkle. It's creepy.
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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Giftofdeprivation
Discerning Vagrant



Registered: 07/20/13
Posts: 3,933
Last seen: 8 years, 28 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
#22284531 - 09/24/15 03:43 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Bitter Cactus said: I am an ex meth addict and there is no way you are gonna be able to change them. Unless you have something better then the rush that meth gives them (which is very unlikely) they will never change their ways.
People only change once they find something that is so important they are not willing to give it up for a rush, no matter how epic it is. Usually these dead beat poorer people honestly have nothing better to look forward to then the rush. I don't blame them. Nothing an NA class offers is gonna excite them in comparison to the drug.
There comes a time when you really do lose yourself in the drug and your sole is stolen and never to be returned. Even if you do get sober you are just a shell of your old self.
That takes years to happen but I have seen it. If you have ever looked into a chronic tweakers eyes when they are sober all you can see is emptiness and no sparkle. It's creepy.
That's really good insight. The less you have to deal with the parents, the better. They're kinda beyond your help, even if you HAD years of substance abuse counseling under your belt.
I really liked rbalzer's point about extended family. If you are close enough to the kids (feeding them), you should ask the kids and see if you can get a hold of them. It's more drama to implicate yourself in, but if you do it subtly, you can extract the info from the kids and give the extended family an anonymous "tip" that their family (children, no less) is in trouble. The trouble is, the kids shouldn't feel like they've done anything wrong, which is tough if they lost their parents. It's a mess, so just be subtle in your conversations with the kids. Never talk about their parents drug habits, unless they bring it up in a normative fashion.
Keep us posted on your progress and stay safe, my friend!
--------------------
Looking for recipes? Have some recipes to share? Please post what you have in the official cooking thread for Pubbers! HERE! Shoutout to Azur's Official cooking thread for OTDers! Posters Beware!
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Sade
Cheatin bastered



Registered: 09/07/15
Posts: 729
Loc: Bigfoot Territory
Last seen: 6 years, 7 months
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Giftofdeprivation]
#22289532 - 09/25/15 06:03 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Thanks a lot guys. I am working full time with over time. We should be able to take care of the daughter. My girls mom will take the young kids. This is all in the future though but looking that way. Fucking bitch was blaming us stealing food. I get home find out she was snooping in someones room and got caught. So she thought she would put some trouble on us. HAH worked the opposite way. Then the dad aaid I made their kid upset which is a bullshit lie. The dad jumbled up his words to make me look like the bad guy. Then everyone asked the kid and he staid. "He is my friend he didn't make me sad" now everyone is getting pissed. So the two tweekers are being extremely friendly now to EVERYONE. These fuckers talk shit about weed, acid, shrooms. Everything except hard drugs. Fucking pathetic tweekers.
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once in a lifetime
sun child



Registered: 02/12/15
Posts: 1,807
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Sade]
#22289768 - 09/25/15 07:13 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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You are welcome my friend; that's what I'm here for.
Quote:
Keep us posted on your progress and stay safe, my friend!
Ditto.
Especially about the kids - kids are the future - and deserve a shot at a normal life; at least, anything within the range of not having to deal with that kind of stuff!
-------------------- Innocent, Oldfield & Hegerland Julia Delaney, Bothy Band Rasta Girl, Sister Carol Genesis, Jorma K I Wish You Peace, Lawrence Laughing Do Your Thing, Moondog large . . music garden . . veryall peace them hiStarhouse - main Time Traveler's Guide
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Hippocampus



Registered: 04/01/15
Posts: 753
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Sade] 1
#22290328 - 09/25/15 09:30 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Man, that is sad. Reminds me of a similar situation we had with our next door neighbors. They were shooting crank while their infant crawled around on the filthy floor covered in glass shards, getting them in his mouth! They had a 17 year old relative staying with them that we ended up taking in for a while. The neighbors ended up getting busted for armed robbery of gas stations. Never found out what happened to the baby.
It's great if you are in a position to step in and make a difference in their kids lives. You may want to team up with the grandparents. When shit hits the fan with these tweakers, you could be in a position to help the children not end up in the hands of the state. The less time they spend in strange foster care the better.
Unfortunately, sticking your head into the shit is impossible to do without coming out dirty. You'll need to be prepared to deal with a ton more bullshit from the parents, and everyone else. And you'll get little thanks at all. If you're ready to make a self-sacrifice and step up for some kids in need then good for you for making the effort! 
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Uzziel
O_o


Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 11,689
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Sade] 1
#22290727 - 09/25/15 10:38 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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I really, really hope you do something about those kids. If the parents don't get help, those kids are going to be neglected.
Please don't turn a blind eye. You can do something about it. They might not be yours, but they are alive and they deserve better than some neglective parents.
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Psilosopherr]
#22292270 - 09/26/15 08:55 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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so, who thinks those kids would be better off in a foster home? Not me.
like it or not, those kids are going to grow up and be substance abusers as well. They're learning but it still probably wont be enough to deter them from using when they become adults. Its genetic. Those kids are doomed from the word "go" basically.
OP, as long as they arent interfering in your life and stealing your shit I'd ignore it. You can only control whats in your space. The rest isnt worth worrying about.
You cant control other people so as long as you're safe, consider it entertainment. Be happy you are not living that life or have those problems.
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sprinkles
otd president


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 21,527
Loc: washington state
Last seen: 3 years, 17 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: sprinkles]
#22292287 - 09/26/15 09:00 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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in all honesty, those kids should just be put to sleep. Save themselves the misery of being a defective
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: sprinkles] 1
#22292362 - 09/26/15 09:08 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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I know a good number of people who had addict parents that grew up more responsible than most. Usually this was because they had a support system aside from their parents that took notice of the fact that they weren't getting help at home and offered guidance. It's definitely a mistake to write someone off because of the mistakes their parents made. I would just try to take care of yourself first OP, as otherwise you can't help anybody, and just try to stay away from the drama as much as possible. If things pass a point where you think the kids are endangered then do what you think is right. If they're going to use the kids to hold your grandmother hostage then you might need to let them go, but that's not to say you should stop caring.
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Uzziel
O_o


Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 11,689
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: sprinkles]
#22294532 - 09/26/15 04:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
sprinkles said: so, who thinks those kids would be better off in a foster home? Not me.
like it or not, those kids are going to grow up and be substance abusers as well. They're learning but it still probably wont be enough to deter them from using when they become adults. Its genetic. Those kids are doomed from the word "go" basically.
OP, as long as they arent interfering in your life and stealing your shit I'd ignore it. You can only control whats in your space. The rest isnt worth worrying about.
You cant control other people so as long as you're safe, consider it entertainment. Be happy you are not living that life or have those problems.
Not foster home. The grandmother or someone else in the family could help raise the kids. Yes it's a giant burden, but is it fair to the kids?
Quote:
sprinkles said: in all honesty, those kids should just be put to sleep. Save themselves the misery of being a defective
............Really? For fucks sake.......
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TrippieHunter
Swagger of a cripple


Registered: 04/05/15
Posts: 889
Loc: Your mums house!
Last seen: 6 years, 16 days
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Re: Family member has meth addiction and affecting all of us. what do I do? [Re: Uzziel]
#22294894 - 09/26/15 06:05 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Agree with everyone else here, take care of the kids. There is nothing you can do for the parents except that. Feed them, let them over whenever they want.
If the kids don't want to be home it is for a reason, listen to them as their parents are not. Don't listen to an of their lies or bullshit, they are only
out for one thing to feed the addiction. It sucks but I have seen it first hand with my older bro. My wife and I always have an open door to the neighbor kids
just so they have a place they feel safe at if their parents are fighting or too drunk. Life is hard from the time were shot out, we all just have to look
out for each other. Good luck and hang in there! Best wishes and thoughts!
-------------------- Just remember keep the camera rolling and FILM THE POLICE!!! CLICK ME WHO'S SIDE ARE YOU ON? CLICK ME TOO! Let it go and you will trip into wonderland!
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