So I feel like I need to write something down. I am not even sure to begin to describe what I experienced, so if this is somewhat scrambled, I apologize.
First off, I am not new to tripping, and I have a natural higher tolerance than the average person for mush. My average does is 8g to 13g, I have gone up into the high teens with doses as well. Normally I take gel caps, sometimes I take 5g or so in some variation of lemon tek, followed by the rest in caps.
Last night I had 12.5g. About 7-8 of those were in gel caps (my caps generally have 0.5-0.6g/cap, and there were 12 caps. The rest of the powder went into some OJ, sat for 5-10 min then downed all at once.
I did my normal routine of showering, grabbing my juice/water and putting on a movie for the come up. I watched Maleficent by the way, HIGHLY recommended if you like watching movies while tripping.
This is where it gets scattered and weird. By the end of the movie I was tripping pretty freaking hard, but I was absolved in the movie. By the end of the movie it was so happy I was beaming, I never watch the same movie twice in a row, but I couldn't wait to get food and watch it again. I went upstairs and opened the fridge, I grabbed two oranges and cut them up. While cutting them up I put on some Steve Aoki, it was great at first but as his beat sped up, so did I, before I realized it I had cut up both oranges, realized I'd never finish both and put some back, searching for other food, I saw baby carrots and grabbed a couple of those. The beat kept speeding up and so did my movements, before I realized it I was pacing fast back in forth between my plate and opening and closing my refrigerator. When I realized this I began to laugh, took out my headphones and looked at my place. I had half a cut up orange and like 2-3 baby carrots. The sight and thought of what was on my place was pure ridiculousness. I grabbed a couple more pieces of orange and made my decent back to the TV.
By the time I got back downstairs it hit me at how hard I was tripping. Near blinding open eyed visuals, though I could see what was going on, I can only describe it as my mind was projecting a different picture to what I was seeing versus experiencing.
I begin the movie again, laying on the couch in an almost comatose state I watched the movie, I could tell what was going on in the movie, but I could not absolve into it as before. Some of the negative or nasty vibes were washing over me, but I was strong, this was to be a good trip, my fate had decided that I would not go into a bad trip, and at that point, my third eye opened. My third eye has opened before, I have experienced ego death, bad trips, most everything. This was destined to be something different.
I could feel my bladder swelling so I got up to pee. I have enjoyed going into my bathroom (one of my bathrooms is smaller with a pretty rhythmic exhaust fan that I find great while tripping. I was listening to the movie still, so I did not turn on the fan. I had closed the door with no light on. Pure darkness. I could see the light come in from under the door but it varied and was a small thin long light. Sometimes I could not tell which way the door was on the wall, but deep down I knew it was there.
I cannot describe the paralyzing love, terror, wonder, and happiness I felt all at once. If you combined these into a new emotion, that is what it felt like. My eyes were flooding, my nose was flooding, but I was not upset, its like my body was draining of all the fluid it could. I felt torn and paralyzed. There was no moving at this point. I would sit here, maybe in this dark void I would find new life. Maybe I would come to some realization, and epic resolution to a problem I had been dealing with, but no...I will live out the remainder of my days in this void. I am into the black nothingness. I am not scared at this point, more curious than anything. How did I not know this void existed right inside my own house? How could such a small organism as a mushroom have shown me this that my brain could have never picked up on it before? Of course while all this is going on I'm seeing amazing visuals, fractals, simultaneously fighting the Kings bad guys in Maleficent...
Then out of no where, I regained my gusto to stand up, my time in this paralyzing void is done. I must continue on with life and escape this secluded dungeon. I muster up enough strength to stand up,and then I realize the void will not let go so easily. I look down, though I am standing on solid ground I begin to float, gravity has taken a break and this void has me floating. I cannot fly, therefore I cannot control my floating in order to escape. I began to try to visualize landing and walking. I reach towards the light in the door, attempt to pull myself towards it. Nothing. I reach left and feel a wall. I pull myself towards the wall and step as close to it as possible so I do not fall into the center of this pit that is the void in the middle of my bathroom. If I do I will surely never escape and will be destined to a life of solitude and loneliness for eternity.
It is not fear that grips me at this point, but rather an internal misunderstanding of what is going on. I cannot enough fathom the other parts that would entail this story. My brain cannot fully process and understand the rest of whats going on. I can somewhat explain a void, explain the pretty colors I see, but there is something else here indescribable that I cannot explain. I felt new emotions that I do not believe exist, I sought understanding from things that are far behind our minds comprehension, but my mind was trying to categorize and make use of this information.
I finally made it out of the void that was my bathroom. I walked out, or rather stumbled, sat on the couch and attempted to take in and understand everything I had just encountered. After collecting my thoughts as much as I could, chugging water, and regaining efforts I knew I had to go back in. Maybe if I did it again I could comprehend better. I repeated these steps 2-3 more times of entering into the black darkness.
Upon my final exit, it was clear that there would be no going back, at least not this trip. My brain could only take so much and I think I exercised it beyond what it had ever been used before. I got comfortable on the couch and put on LOTR as back ground noise. I wanted to listen to music, but Steve Aoki that I put on earlier gave me such a jolt, I decided it was best to listen to LOTR and stair at ceiling. I was still tripping damn hard. This is were I got some mental open eyed visuals. Its strange, my eyes were open and I could see my ceiling but my brain was portraying much more detailed imagery that had nothing to do with what my eyes were seeing.
I saw beautiful things, trippy things, like my brain melting out of my sockets and being folded like silly putty, having a Geisha Elephant God (I don't know if that is what you'd call it), fold my brain, eat it, and blow it back into my head. I dove out of a mouth and into an old viking boat. I looked back at myself and came back to my couch.
I'm going to end it there because 1, I've written a ton, and 2 I'm just not sure how to begin to describe the rest of what I encountered.
I went to bed around 1am, and I've literally slept off and on until about 8pm. I am pretty confident I used parts of my brain last night that has never been used before. This was not the most inspiring life changing trip I have ever had...but it is definitely one I will never forget.
Peace and Happy Vibes.
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 "There he goes. One of God's own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind, never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, and too rare to die."
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Quote:
baldwintpenguin said:
I could feel my bladder swelling so I got up to pee. I have enjoyed going into my bathroom (one of my bathrooms is smaller with a pretty rhythmic exhaust fan that I find great while tripping. I was listening to the movie still, so I did not turn on the fan. I had closed the door with no light on. Pure darkness. I could see the light come in from under the door but it varied and was a small thin long light. Sometimes I could not tell which way the door was on the wall, but deep down I knew it was there.
I cannot describe the paralyzing love, terror, wonder, and happiness I felt all at once. If you combined these into a new emotion, that is what it felt like. My eyes were flooding, my nose was flooding, but I was not upset, its like my body was draining of all the fluid it could. I felt torn and paralyzed. There was no moving at this point. I would sit here, maybe in this dark void I would find new life. Maybe I would come to some realization, and epic resolution to a problem I had been dealing with, but no...I will live out the remainder of my days in this void. I am into the black nothingness. I am not scared at this point, more curious than anything. How did I not know this void existed right inside my own house? How could such a small organism as a mushroom have shown me this that my brain could have never picked up on it before? Of course while all this is going on I'm seeing amazing visuals, fractals, simultaneously fighting the Kings bad guys in Maleficent...
It is not fear that grips me at this point, but rather an internal misunderstanding of what is going on. I cannot enough fathom the other parts that would entail this story. My brain cannot fully process and understand the rest of whats going on. I can somewhat explain a void, explain the pretty colors I see, but there is something else here indescribable that I cannot explain. I felt new emotions that I do not believe exist, I sought understanding from things that are far behind our minds comprehension, but my mind was trying to categorize and make use of this information.
I saw beautiful things, trippy things, like my brain melting out of my sockets and being folded like silly putty, having a Geisha Elephant God (I don't know if that is what you'd call it), fold my brain, eat it, and blow it back into my head. I dove out of a mouth and into an old viking boat. I looked back at myself and came back to my couch.
When I go to pee on mushrooms the toilet usually begins to look like a cauldron or something, always trips me out 
Ganesha be removing the obstacles in your way  "His combination of animal and human attributes is said to reflect the merging of qualities that occurs when a soul achieves unity with the divine"
All I can say is if you haven't already looked into mediation and self-inquiry give it a shot. I haven't got stuck in a void or strong looping process since cultivating a different sense of self that's not based on the ego. I find there's usually not so much a sense of total control but the feeling of being fully present for the entire trip and not missing anything or getting lost in bad thought patterns.
-------------------- It's all for the s
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