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PreparationH
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Registered: 03/28/05
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venting about pretty dark issues... 3
#22255779 - 09/18/15 11:18 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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About 7 years ago I opened my mother's front door to detectives asking who I was and where my dad was. I thought I was headed to prison. As it turned out, my brother told his high school guidance counselor that when he was a child he remembers being raped by my father.
A court proceeding occurred and there just wasn't any evidence to charge my dad with this crime. Prior to this happening, everyone but one of my brother's we'll call Z had stopped communication with my dad because he was just a piece of shit anyway. After this went down obviously we would never speak with him again. My brother Z continued to be a son to my dad and we all resent him for it and it's caused turmoil for the past couple years. How can you still talk to a guy who your brother claims raped him and generally was a bad dad our whole lives anyway?
Things came to a head about a month ago when we were at a family gathering and my dad called Z and said goodbye because he had gone blind and thought he was about to die. No one really cared and my brother was upset(he's fucking 30.) My sister the next day called Z a loser and a scum bag for still talking and giving a fuck about a guy who had fucked up our youngest sibling for a period and I agree. We had a conversation with Z and he just claims he thinks our youngest sibling dreamed it up, yea because 6 year old kids dream of being raped... so he doesn't believe it happened. He claims even if it did happen he can't just cut him off now because he is in such bad health he is about to die but he now finally understands why we don't care if our dad is dead or alive.
A week ago Z tells us we were all removed from the will, which I didn't even know I was still in. Now yesterday he texts me that my dad is now on hospice and they are not going to continue dialysis so he is dying soon. That means Z is probably about to inherit more than half a million dollars from a giant piece of shit that should have been killed 7 years ago.
I don't even know what to say I just want people to read this story. It's stolen a lot from my youngest sibling obviously and has turned us against Z. I am so glad this chapter of my life is about to close with my dad's imminent death and I've dreamed about putting a bullet in his head for years. I think I may regret not killing him on my death bed, if this was another time where I wouldn't sit in prison for life for doing it, I would've bashed his brains out. I don't even want to look at Z anymore and my close friend is astonished we haven't cut him off years ago.
This is the darkest shit from my life and I don't really know what I'm going for here but shroomery is anonymous for me and just wanted to put it out there to random people.
Edited by PreparationH (09/18/15 11:18 AM)
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occollegeboi
MushroomSpaceGod



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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH]
#22255787 - 09/18/15 11:20 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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There is no statute of limitations for rape. I don't know why the case got thrown out the door just because of "insufficient" evidence. Of course there wouldn't be evidence after how many years? Your dad should have gone to prison.
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FractalMind
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: occollegeboi]
#22255812 - 09/18/15 11:27 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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It seems like you and your siblings (excluding Z) are an incredible family. Take pride that you guys stuck together through this, for it would have COMPLETELY destroyed a lot of families. Z obviously had the wrong intentions, and he will realize one day when it's too late that he is wrong.
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Shroomslip
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH] 2
#22255835 - 09/18/15 11:37 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Obviously I don't know every detail, so read this with that in mind.
I want to say first, I know what it is to truly hate your father. I hate mine and would literally kill him if it weren't illegal. He's a giant piece of shit who has succeeded in burning every bridge possible. LITERALLY the entire family has disowned him, one at a time. It wasn't some group collaboration where they all decided he needed to just fuck off, he has been such a worthless person that he has been disowned by everyone one by one. So I get how you feel, I really do. Keep that in mind for the rest of this.
You need to go see your father. It's not for him, it's for you. He's about to die. I thought I hated my grandfather but I really didn't. I didn't realize it until it was too late. He was basically already gone when I went to see him (literally he just wasn't there). It's been a long time and I still think about it almost daily and it eats me the fuck up inside. I also lost my mother, another person I thought I hated. I was at work when I got the news. My wife came up to tell me it happened. At the time I didn't feel anything. I smoked a cigarette or two and went back to work. The next day it all really sank in. I loved her a lot more than I really realized and again I regretted not being there more. This one was even harder because she wasn't on a death bed or anything. She literally died in her sleep on the couch at her house from a heart attack in her 40's. It was completely unexpected.
You can't go back and redo shit like this. Do it now, or risk regretting it forever. Believe me, getting there and doing it when you don't actually care, is a lot better than assuming you don't care and finding out later you do. This is for YOU. If you find out later you do care, you will never find closure. It will eat at you constantly.
Also as a side note, my brother also claimed our father raped him. My father vehemently denied these accusations. But I sided with my brother. My dad is a piece of shit so it wasn't hard to believe. Not even 6 months later my brother admits he made it up just because he was pissed off. He had justifiable reason to hate him enough to try and ruin his life like that, but that doesn't change the fact that it never actually happened. He wasn't coerced or anything to say it didn't happen, it just didn't. People do make shit up just to hurt others. Including claims of rape. You really don't know whether it happened or not. Only those two do.
Hate him for being a piece of shit, but for your own sake I urge you to do what I won't. Go see the piece of shit before time takes the chance from you.
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With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way. I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today. Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear. I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear. You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline
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Salomon
ಠ︵ಠ balance ಠ_ಠ weaver ಠ‿ಠ

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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: Shroomslip] 1
#22255935 - 09/18/15 12:09 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Z knew exactly what he was doing. he wanted the money IMHO
-------------------- EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT
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CHeifM4sterDiezL
Chief Globerts


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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: Salomon]
#22255972 - 09/18/15 12:20 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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IDk dewd is only gonna die once i mean maybe he was motivated by compassion and forgivness in some convoluted attemt to precipatate some form of closure to this.
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MagicalOrangutan
Curious Cat



Registered: 06/29/12
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: Salomon]
#22256013 - 09/18/15 12:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Kids actually do for lack of a better word make this stuff up.
Honestly..I essentially dreamt up that things happened that didn't actually happen, when I was a kid, because I saw too many movies and whatnot about it and news stories and what have you. I told my school my dad molested me even tho be didn't and even tho I loved him. Basically I didn't know what I was talking about because I was a very little kid and had too much stuff put into muy imagination. Didn't even mean to cause anyone any harm. Meh
Plus if y'all already hated your dad so much then how do you know your brother didn't make it up just to get back at him?
My main point is that we as a society can't be putting anyone in prison just because of claims. Then anyone could falsely accuse anyone of anything and fuck them over. Fuck that
-------------------- On the ground you lay, with your dogs you pray, at a neon hieroglyph sky you gaze Hugging your mind, praying to survive, feeling the love of the hieroglyphs in the sky We all need more love, and mainly less hate Hate is the blind that covers the heart's eye That makes the heart's eye cry Locked deep away in the skies of our minds It's all in the mind
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ReposadoXochipilli
Here, there, inbetween



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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH]
#22256117 - 09/18/15 01:02 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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family means nothing when money is one the line often, it is sad.
when my grandmother passed years ago her body wasn't even cold when siblings tried to fight over the inheritance, that shit didn't fly luckily.
sorry to hear about the hardship your family is dealing with, no easy way to deal with being stabbed in the back. sorry.
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PreparationH
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: Salomon]
#22256128 - 09/18/15 01:06 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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MagicalOrangutang how old were you when you claimed that happened? My brother was 16 and is now 22 and still holds that it happened, I believe it.
Quote:
Salomon said: Z knew exactly what he was doing. he wanted the money IMHO
This is what my sister thinks too though I don't believe that. I think Z has his own issues, we have thought for years he may be bipolar and growing up he was that child that slammed his head into the floor when he was angry and he lies frequently. It kind of just doesnt surprise me that he was the one to continue with a relationship.
I dunno, when i get the call or text message he has died I don't know how I'll react yet. I won't be sad that's for sure but Z I think is going to have a mental breakdown and my sister is applauding it all. I'm trying to be the bigger person because someone is about to lose their life but it's hard to to not be glad and the way he is dying(slow and painful) I can see as a sort of justice.
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zappaisgod
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH]
#22256165 - 09/18/15 01:14 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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And none of the rest you of you got touched?
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trekie
Metal man


Registered: 05/11/09
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH]
#22256192 - 09/18/15 01:18 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Dude that sucks man just either way its a giant shit sandwich.
I wish you the best
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Konyap

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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: trekie]
#22256296 - 09/18/15 01:43 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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If he really is the biological father the chances are pretty low, however I knew that my dreams were fantasy at that age.
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PreparationH
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: Konyap] 1
#22291292 - 09/26/15 12:31 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Got the call at 11PM and woke me up from bed, my dad died at about 10:50PM. This has been about 10 years coming, first feelings I felt was relief that it's over.
People keep contacting me apologizing about my loss, they don't know the whole story but I'm just being the bigger person and saying thank you for reaching out.
September 25th will always be a day to remember for me now.
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Nitrous Monkey
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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: PreparationH]
#22291383 - 09/26/15 12:54 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Whoa deep shit man, hope you and your brother eventually work things out. Family is important, life is short.
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Detached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
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I really don't have anything to contribute to this thread from a personal standpoint but family is for life... when everything else fails you on your journey through it, you should always be able to fall back on your family / blood for support and guidance thru times like this.
I don't know what else to say except sorry.
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Salomon
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Registered: 01/17/09
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i don't know whether to say sorry for your loss or congratulations....
so um here's a bunny with a pancake on it's head
-------------------- EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT
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luvdemboomers
loner with a boner
Registered: 01/11/13
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also I'll keep the prep H comment to myself
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Detached
You know where...


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Re: venting about pretty dark issues... [Re: luvdemboomers]
#22291460 - 09/26/15 01:19 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
luvdemboomers said:
also I'll keep the prep H comment to myself]
That is so wrong on multiple levels for this thread.
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