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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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OfflineDaneClark
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Registered: 07/26/14
Posts: 63
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
Need some advice
    #22221309 - 09/11/15 10:48 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'm always more productive when I'm being a control freak.  I need a good system for how to be a control freak and not go overboard with it


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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
Re: Need some advice [Re: DaneClark]
    #22229895 - 09/13/15 03:30 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:smirk: Submit to my authority, and I will give you all the secrets of self control.

Really tho, everyone needs to let go sometimes.  It's part of being a balanced human, and if you hold too tightly onto things you can't control don't be surprised when things get rough.


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OfflineGiftofdeprivation
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Registered: 07/20/13
Posts: 3,933
Last seen: 8 years, 28 days
Re: Need some advice [Re: DaneClark]
    #22239007 - 09/14/15 10:27 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Usually, control freaks have irrational obsessive tendencies. It's tough, because it is an extreme focus that can be used to accomplish a lot. It sucks, because it's clearly anxiety based and there are better ways to find motivation.

It's evolutionary (it works), so that's why it manifested, but it certainly isn't how I'd want to live my life everyday.

have you ever thought about using mindfulness (not religious, but therapeutic)? You need to find ways to control your controlling nature. That is, find distractions for your fixative mindset. Cognitively teach yourself to interrupt your typical thought trains by focusing on the thought trains themselves.

Try these:
Am I worrying about something worth my attention right now?
Is this a rational concern, or am I blowing things up?
Am I missing sleep/meals because of my worry right now?

Start paying attention to the thoughts themselves. try not to doubt yourself, just doubt your fixative nature, because you know you have to work on it.

Spend more time around people who are lax, non-stressed, pothead types. Stress is the enemy and stressful people might be slightly toxic to your situation (but you'll have to learn how to deal with them too). If you want to talk about some of your concerns, or why you feel you have these tendencies, feel free to post anonymously or PM me.


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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order


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