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OfflineDetached
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Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
What are your favorite bad jokes?
    #22190205 - 09/04/15 08:57 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What are your favorite bad jokes?

I heard a few funny ones today..

Did you hear about the woman whose left side was eaten by a tiger? She was alright.

What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu?
If you have bird flu, you need tweet-ment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and the miners in Chili?
In Chili, there were 33 guys in 1 hole, Tiger was 1 guy in 33 holes!!!!

:disappointedlaugh:


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OfflineThe5thBeatle
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Registered: 03/05/15
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22190740 - 09/04/15 10:33 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Knock knock


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: The5thBeatle]
    #22190744 - 09/04/15 10:34 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Whose there?


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22190835 - 09/04/15 10:59 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I got one, its racist as fuck though. Why are there no black people in the flintstones?


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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InvisibleballsalsaMDiscord
Universally Loathed and Reviled
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Registered: 03/11/15
Posts: 20,869
Loc: Foreign Lands
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: robidoe]
    #22190857 - 09/04/15 11:07 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Why do Police Chiefs wear belts?
to hold up their pants

Whats the difference between a(n)(insert ethnicity) woman and a catfish?
one has whiskers and stinks, and the other is a fish

Why do they keep a pile of shit in the corner at (insert ethnicity) weddings?
gotta keep the flies off the bride somehow

Why did the little girl fall off of the swingset?
because she has no arms


--------------------


Like cannabis topics? Read my cannabis blog here


Edited by ballsalsa (09/04/15 11:09 PM)


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OfflineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached] * 1
    #22190869 - 09/04/15 11:11 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I know of a couple..

They've both posted with in the last few hours 
:rimshot:


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Registered: 11/23/14
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22190881 - 09/04/15 11:13 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Because they were still monkeys.... sry i heard it today. I usauly cant remember a joke


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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OfflineWah
Strangest

Registered: 08/31/15
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Loc: NW WA
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shroomslip]
    #22190890 - 09/04/15 11:17 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What's the difference between the holocaust and 9/11?

Anyone?

I promised myself I'd never forget but I don't remember:puddingpop:


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Wah] * 2
    #22190915 - 09/04/15 11:25 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

How do you fit three queers on a bar stool?          Turn it upside down


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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Invisibleluvdemboomers
loner with a boner
Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: robidoe]
    #22190938 - 09/04/15 11:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

why do police dogs lick their ass?


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InvisiblezZZz
jesus
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Wah]
    #22190956 - 09/04/15 11:38 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Knock knock

Who's there?

"Open the door fucker I'm freezing my balls off out here"



A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, it was closing time and they were immediately asked to leave.


--------------------
https://discord.gg/NHHd5y2Uyv


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InvisibleAmanita86
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Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: zZZz] * 1
    #22190962 - 09/04/15 11:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

zZZz said:
Knock knock

Who's there?





"Dave's not here man!"


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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Invisiblememes
Blessed


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Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
Loc: In a Tree
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Amanita86]
    #22190975 - 09/04/15 11:41 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

in 7th grade, at the prime point in your life where you care about what you friends think of you, I was walking through a parking lot towards our car.  alongside were my dad, and best friend.

walking past a car with the license plate "KEN LESS" my dad says 'hey boys, you know why that car's license plate says KEN LESS?'

'no, why?'
















"because if it said KEN MORE it'd be a washing machine"

:doublefacepalm:

i love my dad


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: memes]
    #22191009 - 09/04/15 11:54 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

That's such a dad joke.


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Invisiblememes
Blessed


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Registered: 01/11/05
Posts: 27,785
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22191017 - 09/04/15 11:57 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

yeah i'm a big dadhead


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InvisibleTheDrake
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Registered: 06/15/07
Posts: 1,720
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: memes]
    #22191690 - 09/05/15 08:02 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.


--------------------


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: TheDrake]
    #22192359 - 09/05/15 12:06 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Who was the greatest prostitute in history?              Ms. Pac man, for 25 cents she swollowed ballS untill she died


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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InvisibleShiithead
Your Huckleberry
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Registered: 04/05/13
Posts: 9,997
Loc: God's Flat Green Earth
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22192372 - 09/05/15 12:09 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

How do you save a ******** from drowning???

Take your foot off his head.


--------------------

Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Psalm 12:6
The words of the Lord are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times.
Hebrews 11:3
Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
Revelation 3:11
Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shiithead] * 1
    #22192380 - 09/05/15 12:12 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.


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InvisibleShiithead
Your Huckleberry
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Posts: 9,997
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached] * 1
    #22192394 - 09/05/15 12:16 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Why did God create the mini pony?

So Mexican Natives could have low riders too.


--------------------

Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Psalm 12:6
The words of the Lord are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times.
Hebrews 11:3
Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
Revelation 3:11
Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shiithead] * 1
    #22192405 - 09/05/15 12:18 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What has two legs and bleeds a lot?
Half a cat.


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InvisibleAmanita86
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Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shiithead]
    #22192459 - 09/05/15 12:31 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Shiithead said:
Why did God create the mini pony?

So Mexican Natives could have low riders too.



Hahahahaha!!!  First time I've heard that one..


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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OfflineThe5thBeatle
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Registered: 03/05/15
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Last seen: 1 year, 9 months
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22193946 - 09/05/15 06:31 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I am


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OfflineSunnyD
WiZarD oF LoVe
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Posts: 25,236
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22193973 - 09/05/15 06:37 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

butt fuck it


--------------------
:sunny::inlove::peyotespectrum::peyotespectrum::inlove::sunny:
And to everyone who thinks life is just a game,
Do you like the part you are playing?
This is the time in life I am living!
And I face each day with a smile :smile:
My music Library of Synthesizer goodness


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InvisibleShiithead
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: SunnyD]
    #22194028 - 09/05/15 06:53 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

This joke is so bad it might get you killed...

What's the best thing about having sex with your 12 year old sister in the shower?

When you pull her hair back, she looks like your 8 year old brother.


--------------------

Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.
Psalm 12:6
The words of the Lord are pure words: as silver tried in a furnace of earth, purified seven times.
Hebrews 11:3
Through faith we understand that the worlds were framed by the word of God, so that things which are seen were not made of things which do appear.
Revelation 3:11
Behold, I come quickly: hold that fast which thou hast, that no man take thy crown.


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InvisibleOhMrJohnson
Ashes Against The Grain

Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 17,544
Loc: Terra Incognita Flag
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shiithead] * 1
    #22194148 - 09/05/15 07:24 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I see, said the blind man, as he picked up his hammer and saw


--------------------

Diminish the sub-principle and leave its toxic trace..
Once and for all!


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InvisibleOhMrJohnson
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Registered: 01/12/14
Posts: 17,544
Loc: Terra Incognita Flag
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Shiithead]
    #22194150 - 09/05/15 07:24 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Shiithead said:
This joke is so bad it might get you killed...

What's the best thing about having sex with your 12 year old sister in the shower?

When you pull her hair back, she looks like your 8 year old brother.




You sicken me


--------------------

Diminish the sub-principle and leave its toxic trace..
Once and for all!


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: OhMrJohnson]
    #22194202 - 09/05/15 07:37 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:ahahaha:


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: Detached]
    #22195393 - 09/06/15 01:02 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Wtf i wanna see the joke


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: robidoe] * 2
    #22195417 - 09/06/15 01:12 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

What word starts with 'n' and ends with 'r' and you dont ever want to call a black person?  neighbor


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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InvisibleA Day InThe Life
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: robidoe] * 1
    #22195441 - 09/06/15 01:25 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to stupids house
Knock knock... "who's there?" :datass:    ...THE CHICKEN!  AHAHAHAHA!!


--------------------

:print:  Free Spore Ring Canada  :print:


Edited by A Day InThe Life (09/06/15 01:30 AM)


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Invisiblearago
Mr. Wind Up Bird
Male


Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 828
Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: A Day InThe Life]
    #22196898 - 09/06/15 11:55 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Remember the girl who fell off the swing, because she had no arms?
Her name was Alice.
Knock. Knock.
Who's there?

Not Alice.


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Offlinerobidoe
master shroomer 409
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Registered: 11/23/14
Posts: 328
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Re: What are your favorite bad jokes? [Re: arago] * 2
    #22198102 - 09/06/15 04:24 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Shanana had 10 children all named tyrone. She started to call them down for dinner. How did she call them individually?                                                    By thier last name


--------------------
You know your truley a shroom head when your having a bad trip and relize you enjoy it!


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