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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: Thanatos10]
#22222131 - 09/11/15 01:55 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thanatos10 said: It seems like quite a bit triggers it. Some of them are things that I used to love actually. That makes it hard to stay away from them. Is there a way to break the association?
i doubt you'll really care to know anyway
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: Thanatos10]
#22222449 - 09/11/15 02:58 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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The tough reality of it is that you need to become aware enough of your triggers not to react to them. To be able to tell when you are feeling a trigger and to basically ignore it.
Knowing that something is a definitive trigger makes it easier to avoid over time.
E.g. When you know a snake bites, you don't touch it. When you know it's an emotional trigger, you don't contemplate it.
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: sudly]
#22222519 - 09/11/15 03:10 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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dont waste ur time, the dude is just fishing
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Thanatos10
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Registered: 01/19/15
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: sudly] 1
#22223141 - 09/11/15 05:27 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
sudly said: The tough reality of it is that you need to become aware enough of your triggers not to react to them. To be able to tell when you are feeling a trigger and to basically ignore it.
Knowing that something is a definitive trigger makes it easier to avoid over time.
E.g. When you know a snake bites, you don't touch it. When you know it's an emotional trigger, you don't contemplate it.
Hmm, sounds tricky. So if I do that enough I can break the association with the trigger? I like what was stated earlier about thoughts not being facts, that I don't have to take everything in my head seriously and to not fall into the trap of thinking I see reality as it is.
-------------------- As lightless oblivion devours you, drown in the ever-blooming darkness.
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sudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: Thanatos10]
#22223174 - 09/11/15 05:34 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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This is a bit long but it's a more in depth explanation of how to do it in a TED talk by Guy Winch. These are notes from his speech I took.
/!^ Favouritism. - A speech by Guy Winch. 'How to practice emotional first aid' - Feb 16, 2015. TEDtalks. - - -
How much more we value of the body than the mind.
You have to cover a cut, we all know how to maintain physical health and have known it since being 5 years old. We learnt physical hygiene young.
But what about maintaining emotional hygiene. Why is our physical health more important than our psychological health? We sustain psychological injuries more than we receive physical ones. This includes emotional injuries like failure, rejection or loneliness. They can also get worse if we ignore then and they can dramatically impact our lives in many ways. Even though there are scientifically proven techniques could use to treat these kind of psychological injuries, we don't.
"Oh you're feeling depressed? Just shake it off, it's all in your head." Can you imagine saying that to someone with a broken leg, "Just walk it off, it's all in your leg".
Close the gap between physical and psychological health.
Loneliness creates a deep psychological wound than scrams our thinking, it makes us feel like the people around us care much less than they actually do. It makes us afraid to reach out and afraid of rejection.
Loneliness is defined purely subjectively, it depends solely on whether you feel emotionally or socially disconnected from those around you.
Loneliness kills people. Loneliness is scientifically proven to be as damaging as cigarettes.
You can't treat a wound unless you know you're injured.
Different reactions to the same stimuli. Our mind tricks us into believing something.
Are you aware of how your mind reacts to failure? You need to be, because if your mind tries to convince you you're incapable of something and you believe it then like those two toddlers you'll begin to feel helpless and you'll stop trying too soon or you won't try at all and then you'll be even more convinced you can't succeed. That's why so many people function below their actual potential. Somewhere along the way, sometimes a single failure convinced them that they couldn't succeed and the believed it. Once we're convinced of something it's very hard to change our mind.
Our mind is hard to change once we become convinced. It might be natural to feel demoralised and defeated after you fail but you cannot allow yourself to become convinced you can't succeed. You have to fight feelings of helplessness. You have to gain control over the situation. And you have to break this kind kf negative cycle before it begins.
Our minds and feelings are not the trustworthy friends we thought they were, they're more like a really moody friend who can be totally supportive one minute and real unpleasant the next.
Rejection is painful. The worst things we say to ourselves. After being rejected someone might belittle themselves, how could a man/woman like that ever want me.
Would you tell that to a friend? If a friend was rejected would you tell them no one would ever want you? That's not the kind of thing a friend says yet it's what people tell themselves every day. We all do, especially after a rejection. We start thinking of our faults and shortcomings, what we wish we were, what we wish we weren't, we call ourselves names maybe not as harshly but we all do it. It's interesting that we do because our self esteem is already hurting. Why would we want to go and damage it even further? We wouldn't make a physical injury worse on purpose. You wouldn't get a cut on your arm and decide, "oh I know! I'm going to take a knife and see how much deeper I can make it".
We do this with psychological injuries all the time. Why? Because of poor emotional hygiene. Because we don't prioritise our psychological health. We know from dozens of studies that when your self esteem is lower you are more vulnerable to stress and to anxiety that failure and rejection hurt more and It takes longer to recover from them.
So when you get rejected the first thing you should be doing is revive your self esteem not join fight club and beat it into a pulp. When you are in emotional pain, treat yourself with the same compassion you would expect from a truly good friend.
We have to catch our unhealthy psychological habits and change them. One of the healthiest and most common is called rumination. To ruminate means to choose over. Ruminating about unpleasant events can easily become a habit and it's a very costly one because by spending so much time focused on upsetting and negative thoughts you are putting yourself at risk of developing clinical depression. Alcoholism, eating disorders and even cardio vascular disease.
The problem is the urge to ruminate can feel really strong and really important so it's a difficult habit to stop. I know this for a fact.
A 2 minute distraction can break the urge to ruminate.
You have to catch the urge to ruminate and distract yourself to break it.
So each time I had an upsetting or negative thought I forced myself to concentrate on something else until the urge passed.
Battle negative thinking.
Good things happen, you're more capable than you think.
Build emotional resilience to rejection.
If we began practicing emotional hygiene the quality of life could be improved.
If you become informed and change a few simple habits you can improve your quality of life. - - - And of course the video
-------------------- I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.
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DividedQuantum
Outer Head


Registered: 12/06/13
Posts: 9,819
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: Thanatos10] 1
#22223403 - 09/11/15 06:15 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Thanatos10 said: I like what was stated earlier about thoughts not being facts, that I don't have to take everything in my head seriously and to not fall into the trap of thinking I see reality as it is.
I'm going to jump back in here for a sec and tell you that that is an excellent realization! Alfred Korzybski, the great semanticist, said something that I think you might like: "The map is not the territory." Alan Watts changed it to "The menu is not the meal." Just realize that Nihilism is only one map, and if you don't like it, you can simply use another one! Reality allows for that.
I think you would be doing yourself a great service if you stopped taking your thoughts so seriously. Reality doesn't have to be just one thing -- in fact, it can be an infinite number of things. Adopt or create any model of it you wish -- and then try another one.
-------------------- Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici
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shroominated
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Registered: 11/12/13
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descended masters and ascended masters are amazing don't forget about the balanced masters they ride the grey waves and answer to no force they love both infinite light and infinite darkness and no matter which way the pendulum swings they rain supreme they have no limits that's where the magic happens because we have no religion no spiritual path we literaly carve our own best of both worlds but we arnt Hannah Montana hehehehahaha we are the maker of dreams the creater of worlds the rule breakers and makers the reality programers
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Eggtimer
HotSauce Lover

Registered: 05/04/13
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Quote:
shroominated said: descended masters and ascended masters are amazing don't forget about the balanced masters they ride the grey waves and answer to no force they love both infinite light and infinite darkness and no matter which way the pendulum swings they rain supreme they have no limits that's where the magic happens because we have no religion no spiritual path we literaly carve our own best of both worlds but we arnt Hannah Montana hehehehahaha we are the maker of dreams the creater of worlds the rule breakers and makers the reality programers

Drones, you destined dust eaters This is your anecdote You dwell in a state of hypnos Lost in the illusion of being Subsistence, survival, let us serve Myth and reality altered Samsara, your marked fate
Tyrants - we will tame you Decipher - the codes and be free Subservient - wanderers of this earth are
Ur-Nammu comes to lay his claim Decree the fate of the dead Like drones you are our slaves in rapture
Tyrants - we will tame you Decipher - the codes and be free Subservient - wanderers of this earth are
Thousand lies twisted around you Serpentine lines cage the feeble minds
As the magickan leads the Drones Ur Nammu's sons, mere skin on bones Sink to E-Mumah House of the exalted name Manzat - sanctuary of Babylon The Great Chamber with the seven gods Greets the cold gaunt drones
Tyrants - we will tame you Decipher - the codes and be free Subservient - wanderers of this earth are
Thousand lies twisted around you Serpentine lines cage the feeble minds
Drones, you destined dust eaters This is your anecdote You dwell in a state of hypnos Lost in the illusion of being
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BrendanFlock
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Re: What is spirituality? [Re: Eggtimer]
#22243577 - 09/15/15 09:50 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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peace is just as affordable as hate and injustice..its never anything more than just being honest to yourself..and in doing so you find justice from the people who need the truth as well...and so being honesty isnt just good for the soul and the micro person..but as in everything good at the macro essentials of existence..and that who you help in multiplied units..is of course true as well..compassion and empathy are routes and passageways the government of Salvation..to share is to be true..essential and charity is love..you can feel what other people are saying and doing..and that sense itself is part of your being..which is interconnected through the fabric of existence..The Soul is a Yoke of an Egg..and one day the egg cracked and out popped a Chocobo..
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