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Invisibleluvdemboomers
loner with a boner
Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
embarrassing stories- never told anyone this * 2
    #22175021 - 09/01/15 06:05 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

This happened about 4 years ago. I had just ordered a pizza and it was gonna be 15 minutes till it was ready for pickup. I was trying to figure out what to do until then. Video games... no not enough time. Tv... don't want to watch half a show. Jerk off... sounds perfect. So I jerked off and shot a huge load. Could not find it anywhere. 15 minutes had gone by so I said fuck it and went to get my pizza. Get to the register and there's this really cute girl there she looks at me and then like bites her lip and smirks as if trying not to laugh. Idk what the bitches deal is, who cares, I get my pizza and go home. Only to find a huge jizz spot about 4 inches below the neckline in the dead center of my shirt :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:



Your turn.


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OfflineQuit The Cult
World is yours

Registered: 11/12/14
Posts: 265
Last seen: 8 years, 3 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: luvdemboomers] * 1
    #22175031 - 09/01/15 06:07 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Hahahaha


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Ill always have typos. Using a shitty phone to write on here.


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OfflineRainyWA
Male


Registered: 10/07/14
Posts: 186
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: Quit The Cult] * 1
    #22175036 - 09/01/15 06:09 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:ducklol: :carlinorgasm:


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: luvdemboomers]
    #22175062 - 09/01/15 06:14 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:lolsy:I can't come close to that and I've been around a long time


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OfflineRainyWA
Male


Registered: 10/07/14
Posts: 186
Last seen: 5 years, 2 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: zappaisgod]
    #22175077 - 09/01/15 06:20 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Did you ever return to buy more pizza?:rofl2:


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OfflineBig Worm
Perf
 User Gallery


Registered: 04/20/09
Posts: 7,642
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: RainyWA]
    #22175105 - 09/01/15 06:28 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Lol that's hilarious.



I went to NYC to see Benga and Caspa years ago at Webster Hall.  On our way up there I heard this song called "Dominion" by Benga and I thought it was dope so I was hoping he would play it at the show.


Fast Forward, hours later, we washed out two empty vials of L in the hotel room and each ate these really good rolls I got from San Francisco.


Now, I didn't know what Benga looked like at the time, except that he was black.  Now this DJ comes on stage that happens to be black, I was spun so I was convinced it was Benga.  So i'm in the front row screaming "Dominion!!  Dominion!!"  and noticed all of these people looking at me weird.


Turns out it wasn't even Benga  :lol:    :facepalm:


I felt like such an idiot.


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OfflineJanky Tits

Registered: 06/19/14
Posts: 4,037
Last seen: 5 years, 6 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: Big Worm] * 1
    #22175169 - 09/01/15 06:44 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I saw my grandpas dick and he caught me staring


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OfflineRobZombie68
The Shaman's Apprentice
Male

Registered: 06/22/14
Posts: 820
Loc: Palookaville, US
Last seen: 30 days, 5 hours
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: luvdemboomers] * 2
    #22185528 - 09/03/15 09:56 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

My woman once had a 3 day old Subway tuna sandwich, I threw it in my lunchbox to bring for work, as I had it at lunch I noticed the guacamole had turned black, but chowed down anyway, it was fucking scrumdilly!

After work we were leaving for Lake Tahoe for the weekend.  Long story short, I spent the night through until the following morning playing blackjack, I felt I needed to piss  so I got up and walked to the elevators to the bathroom, as I stepped on I just felt this hot juice filling the back of my pants (blue jeans  :frown:  )I had no feeling whatsoever of this coming on, it just randomly free-flowed.

I went into the shitter and immediately had to remove shoes, etc. to get pants off and trash my underwear, during which someone walked in the bathroom, I tried to maintain composure.  I got it together and checked the massive brown stain on back of my jeans, so I quickly shuffled back to the blackjack table to retrieve my chips as I grabbed them the dealer looked at me, I had a look of sheer terror.  I walked out into the sunshine of families bustling about a craft fair to my hotel across the way.

The Walk of Shame.  :frown:


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OfflineBitter Cactus
reformed bad boy
 User Gallery


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: luvdemboomers]
    #22185552 - 09/03/15 10:01 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

luvdemboomers said:
This happened about 4 years ago. I had just ordered a pizza and it was gonna be 15 minutes till it was ready for pickup. I was trying to figure out what to do until then. Video games... no not enough time. Tv... don't want to watch half a show. Jerk off... sounds perfect. So I jerked off and shot a huge load. Could not find it anywhere. 15 minutes had gone by so I said fuck it and went to get my pizza. Get to the register and there's this really cute girl there she looks at me and then like bites her lip and smirks as if trying not to laugh. Idk what the bitches deal is, who cares, I get my pizza and go home. Only to find a huge jizz spot about 4 inches below the neckline in the dead center of my shirt :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:



Your turn.




:smugjerry:


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Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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InvisiblezZZz
jesus
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: luvdemboomers]
    #22185633 - 09/03/15 10:14 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I have similar story as op's, except the cum got stuck in one of the ear lobes, so then like this chick named Mary knocks on the door so I open it and she immediately grabs the cum from the ear thinking it's gel and puts it on her hair. Dumb bitch.


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https://discord.gg/NHHd5y2Uyv


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: zZZz]
    #22185650 - 09/03/15 10:17 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Let's all gather in a circle and hold hands while we tell our most intimate jack-off stories


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InvisibleCowb0yNeal00
Other


Registered: 06/05/13
Posts: 11,059
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: Detached]
    #22185663 - 09/03/15 10:21 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Detached said:
Let's all gather in a circle and hold hands while we tell our most intimate jack-off stories



LOL:smugjerry:


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OfflineAcaterpillar
A little mad...
Male User Gallery


Registered: 06/09/07
Posts: 18,693
Loc: Down the rabbit hole
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: zZZz]
    #22185671 - 09/03/15 10:25 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

One time I was eating out my girlfriend at the time.
I was stroking myself while going down on her and it was so hot that I unintentionally got myself off.
Somehow she noticed and asked; "Did you already cum?"
I was too embarrassed to admit it, so I lied and fucked her anyway.


:shrug:


--------------------
Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...

At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
Re: embarrassing stories- never told anyone this [Re: Acaterpillar]
    #22185682 - 09/03/15 10:27 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

That's what I call taking care of business :thumbup:


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