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InvisibleSirShroomsAlott
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Registered: 05/15/14
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Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick?
    #22168601 - 08/31/15 11:11 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I feel like we all have those thoughts when someone presents you with something you don't want to do and you just think like "oh wtf I should just kill myself now" or something a long those lines without really meaning it. But has anyone every truly got to the point of wanting to or even tried and failed? What do you think the ideal way to do it would be?

Or if you haven't ever thought like that, how would you choose to die if you were given the choice to pick? If god or whatever was like alright in 30 years you're going to die, but I'll let you choose the way in which you die, how would you choose to go? Can be anything realistic.


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Invisiblelarry.fisherman
shoulda died already
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott] * 1
    #22168606 - 08/31/15 11:13 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'd like to jump out of a plane and just stare in to the clouds and blue sky one last time before it all fades away.


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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: larry.fisherman]
    #22168613 - 08/31/15 11:15 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Probably OD or driving my car off a bridge at breakneck speed.


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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InvisibleShroomerInTheRye
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott]
    #22168629 - 08/31/15 11:18 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I was hospitalized in 2008 for a suicide attempt.  I tried to cut my wrists.  Nowadays, I'd rather take 17 vicodin.  Seems less messy.


--------------------
:nyan: <-- Clicky Clicky


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: ShroomerInTheRye]
    #22168656 - 08/31/15 11:23 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

The only way to kill yourself without fucking up is to jump off a bridge or building.

If I were to do it it would be that way. I would not want to be one of those people that fucks up a hundred times.



Have I thought about killing myself though? Honestly when I am depressed all the time. :shrug: I enjoy life though, I could never see myself doing it. You only live once I would like to live old cause none of this matters anyways so why not enjoy your only time on the earth?


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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Offlinesanchothestoner
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22168674 - 08/31/15 11:26 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

i would like to blow my brains out or od on heroin and benzos.


--------------------
I fucking hate you... God damn, I love you...
But we both know if we stick together, we'll just tear ourselves apart
You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy, when skies are grey
You are my heroin, but there's an abscess... God damn, I miss the vein!


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OfflineHellogoodbyedeath

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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott]
    #22168681 - 08/31/15 11:27 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yes, very many times. My suicidal ideation isn't anywhere near as prevalent as it was a few years ago through this past December, though.

I have no desire to talk about methods.


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: larry.fisherman]
    #22168707 - 08/31/15 11:33 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

XLCaps said:
I'd like to jump out of a plane and just stare in to the clouds and blue sky one last time before it all fades away.



This on LSD was what I was thinking.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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InvisibleMidnight_Toker
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Hellogoodbyedeath] * 1
    #22168719 - 08/31/15 11:35 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Death by snoo snoo.

Really though I wouldn't mind a huge shot of heroin.  Rush and then unconscious oblivion.

Suicide bag is a good option too.

I can definitely say I've wanted to kill myself many times, but I think more often I just wanted to be dead or have never been born, not actually kill myself.  Things would have been a lot easier if I had just never been born.  But then I have a beautiful experience and remember that it's not all happiness and roses, but the happiness and roses can make it worth being alive through all the pain.


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: sanchothestoner]
    #22168724 - 08/31/15 11:37 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

sanchothestoner said:
i would like to blow my brains out or od on heroin and benzos.



If you blow your brains out, make sure you don't do it somewhere a loved one will have to clean up after you.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott]
    #22168727 - 08/31/15 11:37 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

a gentle overdose with opiates and benzos and maybe some mdma, slowly increasing the dose of something like opium and something like clonazepam or xanax until I fell out and didn't wake up.

Or if I was feeling really brave I would take a massive dose of ketamine and DMT then drown myself in ice cold water so that my brain activity lasted for up to an hour instead of a few minutes.

Third choice get incredibly fucked up on MDMA, opiates and benzos and jump out of a plane over somewhere really gorgeous.

Or die in the arms of my loving wife while on a good dose of LSD and MDMA.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineFaustoid
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #22168749 - 08/31/15 11:44 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I wanted to end pretty bad when I was in high school, I was depressed all the time and generally could not justify tomorrow. I got the shotgun in my mouth and finger on the trigger, a part of me would always bubble up and ask questions like "what about mom?" "Is this how you want to be remembered?" "Really? In your parents house? With a gun that was gifted to you by your hunter father?"

One day during august I found a young man with a family who ended it the same way with the same make and model shotgun I owned in the alley behind his parents house. I was with a friend who I told to go find a phone while I made sure no other kids came by and say what we saw (there was a carnival going on a block away). He ended up going to the guys parents house to get the phone. I watched first hand what happens to a family that finds their son and brothers dead body.

I don't think about suicide anymore. I have plenty of justification for tomorrow if only so my family never goes through that pain by my hand.

Edit: wrote gun instead of phone. Dir.


Edited by Faustoid (08/31/15 11:46 AM)


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Faustoid]
    #22168757 - 08/31/15 11:46 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

If karma is real (and I believe it is) then killing yourself ensures you go to the next world with a massive debt of negative karma for all the pain and grief you caused (in most cases, if you have constant pain/terminal illness the story can be very different) and going to your death in a self-directed act that causes massive suffering to those you love is probably the worst thing you can do, and might result in negative rebirths, painful and frightening bardos, even some time in "hell realms"

Or maybe not, but its nothing I want to risk.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: nicechrisman]
    #22168766 - 08/31/15 11:48 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

If you insist on blowing your brains out, do it outside in a field maybe, or in the shower wrapped in cellophane.

Me, personally, yeah, I think about death and suicide all of the time. Death because it is the unknown, something that has always greatly interested me. Suicide, because it is always an available option, at least in most situations. The finality in the act is as dark as it gets.

If I were to off myself jumping off a building or out of a plane sounds like an interesting prospect. Drowning also seems like a peaceful way to go. Tie some cinder blocks to your feet and then throw the cinder blocks overboard. The struggle wouldn't last long, not too much pain.

If I was actually going to do this though, I would want it to be memorable, or at least have a point. Make a statement. Killing yourself for the simple fact that you are sad is pathetic, especially if you have people in your life that love you.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22168773 - 08/31/15 11:50 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Why would anyone choose any kind of suicide other then overdose on euphoric and sedating drugs?

Good feels, then sleepiness, then...


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineEzuma
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22168785 - 08/31/15 11:54 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Never wanted to but i think something like carboon monoxide poisoning would be my style, aka dull


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Ezuma]
    #22168789 - 08/31/15 11:55 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Overdosing with drugs only works like ten percent of the time.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe] * 1
    #22168792 - 08/31/15 11:56 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Moonshoe said:
Why would anyone choose any kind of suicide other then overdose on euphoric and sedating drugs?

Good feels, then sleepiness, then...



I would rather be conscious when it happens. Bardos and all that.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22168796 - 08/31/15 11:58 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I feel like if I were to try to kill myself with drugs I would end up regretting the decision, by then it being too late. Especially an overdose on MDMA..How would that be fun?

If you were in a suicidal mind-state, how would taking LSD right before you kill yourself be a good idea? Either you stick to the plan and perish in a psychedelic hell, or you realize all the reasons you should not kill yourself and change your mind.

There is more to life then drugs, and even if there was not, why waste good drugs on someone that is just going to use them to off themselves anyway?

I don't know, there is just no symbolism there, making the suicide seem pointless. At least not in the suicidal situations that I conjure up within my mind.


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OfflineJanky Tits

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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22168799 - 08/31/15 12:00 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I want to eat 90lb of PMA.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22168802 - 08/31/15 12:01 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

The LSD and MDMA would be for if you were going to die anyways, from a terminal illness like cancer. LSD is often used for death anxiety and often helps people come to profound peace with their own death process and allows people to die with equanimity, peace and understanding. The MDMA is useful for PTSD type symptoms. Together they would potentially allow you to die glowing with love and understanding and joy.

If I was actually going to KILL myself (not going to die otherwise) I would go for like heroin and xanax, get the best rush of my life then fall into an unconscious sleep.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22168807 - 08/31/15 12:03 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Want to clarify that I strongly advise against suicide and i am in no way counselling it or advising anyone how to do it!

Please get help, you have no idea how much happienss in your future you might miss out on or how much you might hurt your friends and family if you kill yourself.

So much better to sell all your possessions, quit your job and go on a trip around the world.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22168850 - 08/31/15 12:14 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I hear you Mantis.

Go out Aldous Huxley style.

I also concur on selling your possessions, travelling, and taking chances before going to such drastic, final measures. Who knows what you may run into in a world so full of opportunities.

The trick is to transcend the bullshit.

Still I feel as though dying would be similar to a trip on it's own. You hear countless stories about people and children having near-death experiences and seeing the light, or being surrounded by all of their loved ones, their entire lives flashing before their eyes, tunnels, etc...

Isn't DMT released in the brain naturally upon birth and death, or is that just a rumor?

I personally believe in reincarnation, and ending your own life will lead to bad karma and follow you into your next one. When the days get really bad, I wonder what crimes of morality I committed in my past life.


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22168859 - 08/31/15 12:16 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yes Near death/ death experiences will be a trip and many thing its natural DMT at work. But I figure why take the chance? Ill smoke a bunch of DMT on my death bed to make sure my body has extra to squirt into me when I die.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22168891 - 08/31/15 12:24 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Hobos downtown in the winter get cold and sometimes just jump off the buildings.

Heroin is tough to find here and nobody has any guns that I know.


Most drug overdoses DO NOT work no matter how hard you try. My friend did two half gram shots back to back of meth and survived. He had to go to the hospital but he survived.


I do not advocate for suicide either. Just gotta mention that at least so I don't get another ban.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22168926 - 08/31/15 12:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Meth is really hard to OD on. If those were two half gram shots of H and your friend had no tolerance, he'd be dead no question.


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: hex_enduction]
    #22168950 - 08/31/15 12:38 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I bought a 150$ bag of meth in it, that had a least a gram and a half of meth in it. Over the course of the day I was doing shots and smoking it, then got so paranoid I ate the entire bag cause I thought I was seconds away from being arrested and didn't want to go to jail.

I had full blown psychosis and was sprinting up and down streets, hiding in people's backyards and garages, doing front flips over fences running shirtless. I am surprised as fuck I never got arrested or had a stroke. I ate at least a gram not even fucking with you.

It is very tough to OD on meth.

And btw I still have slight PTSD from that psychosis, there would be armies of cops and choppers chasing me man it was so fucked up. That was my ultimate low.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




Edited by Bitter Cactus (08/31/15 12:38 PM)


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: hex_enduction]
    #22168964 - 08/31/15 12:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

My life has ran off the rails. I have become 360 lbs. You have no idea what an ordeal, agony and humiliation that is.

I am in the process of changing that but do get occasional thoughts of dying as the easy way out.

One way's getting hit by a brick sized metallic asteroid, the other is macgyvering together a high explosive bomb and blowing up my head with it. If you're a chemistry enthusiast, all you need is a few shopping trips away.

Look at this, its perfect, soda bottle full of PLX, you wouldnt notice a thing in the 1/40,000 second the shockwave needs to do its thing:



But I do NOT want to die. I'm not suicidal at all, part of me just daydreams about a quick fix.


--------------------
Omnicyclion.org
higher knowledge starts here


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22169013 - 08/31/15 12:50 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

It is indeed very hard to OD on meth but I never said that was the plan, I said opiates and benzos, which it is extremely easy to OD on and is what they are now using for executions in America on death row. Used to be phenobarbitol but now they are using hydrocodone and midazolam (opiate and benzo)


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22169069 - 08/31/15 01:03 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Moonshoe said:
It is indeed very hard to OD on meth but I never said that was the plan, I said opiates and benzos, which it is extremely easy to OD on and is what they are now using for executions in America on death row. Used to be phenobarbitol but now they are using hydrocodone and midazolam (opiate and benzo)



That's not at all what I would have expected. I figured they just shot you with strychnine or some shit :lol:


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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InvisibleAsante
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: hex_enduction]
    #22169125 - 08/31/15 01:19 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

hex dude you have no idea how mostrous a strychnine injection is.

You convulse and cramp to death while wide awake. The Nazi swine Oskar Dirlewanger had groups of Jewish women strippped and injected with strychnine to convulse to death as an amusing spectacle for him and his friends to watch, the sick fuck. Their naked bodies would twist and contort to death in the most agonizing way imaginable.


--------------------
Omnicyclion.org
higher knowledge starts here


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Asante]
    #22169158 - 08/31/15 01:26 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I am not really into tech n9ne but this thread has me thinking of this song I listen to sometimes when I need a fresh change of perspective. Lyrics are real.

[url=http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KW2Eo1dnL8c]http://
/url]


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Asante]
    #22169161 - 08/31/15 01:26 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

By the way Asante :hug: I love you and hope you feel well. I know you struggle with feelings related to your weight and that is understandable. But try to have the perspective that whatever your problems they are only temporary and apparent reflections of maya or illusion. The true underlying spiritual reality from which you are inseperable is love, light and Bliss (Sat, Chit, Ananda).

The path you are on (spiritual revelation through chemognosis) is far preferable to suicide. If you ever feel like ending it is becoming a more attractive solution, please PM me, I am always here to talk.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineTurtletotem
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22169176 - 08/31/15 01:30 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I have plans for when life becomes unbearable, but you guys probably think it's dumb.
It's also pretty agonizing.

The plan is to go to a dangerous nature place, probably a jungle or desert, then I will eat my final shrooms and wander into the wildernis without supplies. I'll be dead before I'll come down.

And it will give my family a great story...


--------------------


Edited by Turtletotem (08/31/15 01:31 PM)


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Turtletotem]
    #22169181 - 08/31/15 01:31 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Why make agonizing plans? To me opiates are a tragedy for healthy people but a godsend for the very sick.

If you have to die why not enjoy the rush of opiates that you (hopefully) denied yourself during life?

I am saving opiates for when all else is grim and dark.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineTurtletotem
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22169183 - 08/31/15 01:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Moonshoe said:
Why make agonizing plans? To me opiates are a tragedy for healthy people but a godsend for the very sick.

If you have to die why not enjoy the rush of opiates that you (hopefully) denied yourself during life?

I am saving opiates for when all else is grim and dark.




I'm affraid I don't really want to die when life is blissful.


--------------------


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Turtletotem]
    #22169185 - 08/31/15 01:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Unless you believe in fairies and dragons, you really only get 80 years of existence and it's over. You are only going to be on the planet earth alive one time. Fact.

My attitude is, for the next zillion trillion infinite years I will not exist ever. This is your only time alive which is crazy if you think about it.

Why end it now?


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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OfflineTurtletotem
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22169194 - 08/31/15 01:33 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Bitter Cactus said:
Unless you believe in fairies and dragons, you really only get 80 years of existence and it's over. You are only going to be on the planet earth alive one time. Fact.

My attitude is, for the next zillion trillion infinite years I will not exist ever. This is your only time alive which is crazy if you think about it.

Why end it now?




Woah not now, mate. But when like, alzheimer's kicks in or cancer or some shit like that.

I got PLEEEENTYYYY of years left, fairies and dragons willing.


--------------------


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22169203 - 08/31/15 01:35 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I would only kill myself if I had a terminal illness that I could not hope to cure and destroyed my quality of life and was certain to only get worse. In that case it would be better to die quickly and in euphoric bliss rather then slowly and agonizingly.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineBitter Cactus
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Turtletotem]
    #22169206 - 08/31/15 01:36 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I know, but for a religious person they think they are gonna be flying in the clouds with angels and jesus and all that. I really doubt they have kratom or weed in heaven too so it would be super lame and boring after the millionth year of giving Jesus blowjobs all day.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22169221 - 08/31/15 01:39 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:lol:

In all seriousness, I believe that the phenomenon of veridical Near death experiences, in which people accurately describe things that happened when they were "dead" with no brain or heart activity and eyes closed, even things happening in adjacent rooms, is essentially proof that we exist independently of the body and in all likelihood survive death.

I generally suspect that the Buddhist and Hindu theories of rebirth, bardos, between death states and afterlife states is partially true, and generally suspect we do not die at death nor is our consciousness exclusively created by our bodies / brains.


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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OfflineTurtletotem
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #22169223 - 08/31/15 01:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Bitter Cactus said:
I know, but for a religious person they think they are gonna be flying in the clouds with angels and jesus and all that. I really doubt they have kratom or weed in heaven too so it would be super lame and boring after the millionth year of giving Jesus blowjobs all day.




Jesus semen = LSD, tho, so look who's the fool now.


--------------------


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Turtletotem]
    #22169235 - 08/31/15 01:42 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

If we are all truly one and infinite as most people that have experienced the psychedelic experience realize, then life does not end after death. Death is another part of life.

One consciousness experiencing itself subjectively...

Sorry Mr. Hicks, you're just so right.

Then again everything is subjective so why bother trying to even figure it out. Since we do not know for certain, it is my firm belief that we really should try to make the best out of this life because it is the only one that is actually guaranteed as far as we know.


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InvisibleJean-guy Masta
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Turtletotem]
    #22169247 - 08/31/15 01:45 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

asphyxiation from a car co2 ,wasted on liquor listening to a last song will burning a last smoke

but being honest im super scared to die, drugs showed me that :lol: i honestly think about killing my self like once 2-3 year even tho i can be gloomy from time to time.

weirdly i find that there is something hella beautiful into sadness ,when im gloomy i can just listen to sad music or make music, smoke weed and enjoy ,sadness is a high itself and its fill with inspiration. 

Sometime i wish i would understand the pain of the truly depressed..


--------------------


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Offlinehex_enduction
satta massa gana
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Asante]
    #22169271 - 08/31/15 01:51 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Asante said:
hex dude you have no idea how mostrous a strychnine injection is.

You convulse and cramp to death while wide awake. The Nazi swine Oskar Dirlewanger had groups of Jewish women strippped and injected with strychnine to convulse to death as an amusing spectacle for him and his friends to watch, the sick fuck. Their naked bodies would twist and contort to death in the most agonizing way imaginable.



God damn that's one of the worst things I've ever heard. That being said, it wouldn't be the first time the US government wielded that level of cruelty on its own citizens.

@Jean-Guy, it's true. Sadness and major depression are far from one in the same. This is why people who have never suffered from depression seem to find it so difficult to empathize with the depressed and why you'll hear people say things like, "Why don't you just stop being depressed?"


Edited by hex_enduction (08/31/15 01:54 PM)


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Jean-guy Masta] * 3
    #22169289 - 08/31/15 01:57 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I know what you mean masta about sadness being beautiful. That beautiful feeling of melancholy you feel within the loneliness that envelops all who are open to it. Here is a song I listen to when I am sad.

[url=http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-uJ61jgFCMM]http://
/url]


Edited by cosmicg (08/31/15 01:58 PM)


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Offlinehex_enduction
satta massa gana
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22169302 - 08/31/15 02:01 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

+1 Great song


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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InvisibleJean-guy Masta
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: hex_enduction]
    #22169362 - 08/31/15 02:18 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:manofapproval:

Quote:

hex_enduction said:
+1 Great song






--------------------


Edited by Jean-guy Masta (08/31/15 02:18 PM)


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OfflineBeanhead
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Jean-guy Masta]
    #22169529 - 08/31/15 02:54 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yes.
Hang myself using AV charger.

Throw myself infront of car
Keep laying on the traintracks
Jump of a bridge
Keep drinking then take GHB
Keep drinking then Inject Heroin
Cut wrists lay in bath


Preferably
IV Barbiturate OD


Edited by Beanhead (08/31/15 02:55 PM)


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OfflineKonyap

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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Beanhead]
    #22170101 - 08/31/15 05:13 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Heroin goes straight to the brain
no after life
just pitch black

I've wanted to by a shotgun for the longest time but I imagine the shock and terror would be tremendous


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Konyap]
    #22170196 - 08/31/15 05:32 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I have read a decent amount of responses now, and I still cannot fathom killing myself just because I am sad. I also cannot fathom killing myself by purposefully overdosing on drugs.

What in the hell is wrong with you people? If you have love that is all you need. If you feel as though you do not have love, you do, you are just looking in all of the wrong places.

Look guys another song I listen to while sad.

I have more.

[url=http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Clxtg2pFTQM]http://
/url]


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InvisibleShroomerInTheRye
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22170231 - 08/31/15 05:38 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I have to say I'm envious of you.  You have no idea what depression can do to a person.  I wish I never knew depression.  I'd be a lot happier.

"Just snap out of it!"
"Yeah, because I enjoy waking up every morning with an enormous urge to hurt or kill myself."


--------------------
:nyan: <-- Clicky Clicky


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InvisibleSirShroomsAlott
Howdy
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22170252 - 08/31/15 05:42 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

It's hypotheticals, say you were dying of a terminal illness and suffering bad everyday but you could pick the best way (to you) to opt out. Dieing seems to be awful no matter how you choose, what's the least awful in your opinion.

For people who do it for other reasons, it's more than just sadness :shrug:


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Invisiblelarry.fisherman
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22170293 - 08/31/15 05:50 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Yeah the last thing I had in mind wasn't depression when I answered. If I was terminal, or was too old to take care of myself(incontinent, confused, alzheimers) then I'd want the opportunity to end my suffering. Life is not all vagina and rainbows.


Edited by larry.fisherman (08/31/15 06:41 PM)


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: ShroomerInTheRye]
    #22170325 - 08/31/15 05:54 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

ShroomerInTheRye said:
I have to say I'm envious of you.  You have no idea what depression can do to a person.  I wish I never knew depression.  I'd be a lot happier.

"Just snap out of it!"
"Yeah, because I enjoy waking up every morning with an enormous urge to hurt or kill myself."




I do though.

That is why I am posting in this thread.

Currently I am drowning in a wave of depression that has swallowed me whole, but if I lay here too long I won't have a job, girlfriend, family, etc.


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Invisiblemoonrockmushy
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22170450 - 08/31/15 06:22 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I've thought about it but I would not say I've ever really wanted to do it.

If I did it and I had the luxury of choices I would be hanging from a nice old tree I think.  I just find it romantic :nicesmile: and I often find that I have the urge to wring my neck when I get really frustrated with myself, so it seems fitting.  I'd want it to be at least a little slow so I could enjoy it.


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InvisibleShroomerInTheRye
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22170458 - 08/31/15 06:23 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'm sorry if I snapped.  It was the "what the hell is wrong with you people" that pushed the button.

Anyways, I don't think its a lack of love.  It pours out if my life like a fountain.  The problem is I can't feel it no matter how hard I try.


--------------------
:nyan: <-- Clicky Clicky


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OfflineSurReality
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott]
    #22170515 - 08/31/15 06:36 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

falling from over 10,000 feet


--------------------
ProDOPEFiend Diary: (my public diary)

PodCast


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OfflineLitto
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SirShroomsAlott]
    #22170540 - 08/31/15 06:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Nice to see the pub..cheery as ever


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InvisibleSirShroomsAlott
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Litto]
    #22170546 - 08/31/15 06:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

And lacking relevant responses, you know, the usual


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OfflineFaustoid
समन
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22171509 - 08/31/15 09:51 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

cosmicg said:
I have read a decent amount of responses now, and I still cannot fathom killing myself just because I am sad. I also cannot fathom killing myself by purposefully overdosing on drugs.

What in the hell is wrong with you people? If you have love that is all you need. If you feel as though you do not have love, you do, you are just looking in all of the wrong places.

Look guys another song I listen to while sad.

I have more.

[url=http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Clxtg2pFTQM]http://
/url]






Truly you do miss the point. Depression is like a tick after you pull the tick off, you can feel it like an itch, it is always there, but you can't itch it. You feel it creep into every thought. Sadness isn't the syndrome, it's a symptom.  When I was caught in depressive states I was a mass of curled up flesh on the floor, not a human fighting a disease. I was a worm slave to the thought. The thought of worthlessness, the thought of failure, the thought of freedom of thoughtlessness. Yes love saves, however when your own mind attacks you from within it has a terrible ability to turn every loved one into a prying eye that judges.

Do not pass judgment on the depressed or grieving my friend, not lest you feel like being smashed by a gavel when you meet them and hear their stories.

"Just because I am sad." :singletear:

Sorry if I misinterpreted you, however, I feel I needed to say that.


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OfflineDetached
You know where...


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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Faustoid]
    #22171516 - 08/31/15 09:53 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I would take one of those suicide vacations over in Mexico and drink the water


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InvisibleSARAtonin
Violent Dreams
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Faustoid]
    #22171521 - 08/31/15 09:54 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Someway unobtrusive.


--------------------
God kills indiscriminately and so shall we. For no creatures under God are as we are none so like him as ourselves.

Want to join a cult? Click for details…


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OfflineAcaterpillar
A little mad...
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: SARAtonin]
    #22171535 - 08/31/15 09:57 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'd probably create some contraption on a timer that would cut me down after hanging myself.


--------------------
Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...

At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Acaterpillar]
    #22171551 - 08/31/15 10:00 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I would choose to be ripped apart by Great White sharks.


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Offlinecosmicg
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22171599 - 08/31/15 10:09 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I am sorry Shroomery.

I suppose it's just that I feel what you are feeling but have no answer other then to just deal with it.

Trust me, it is a struggle just to get out of bed due to my recent decline in health, mentally I mean, and I apologize if I offended you because I know the struggle.

That's why I am talking in this forum m8.

We are in this together.


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OfflineSeriously_trippin
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg] * 1
    #22171750 - 08/31/15 10:38 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

I'm resolved to never commit suicide and this month has been one the most painful depressing months of my life. Even just day to day now,I've been so shocked but I feel I can't let life win. It's a challenge for sure but hopefully one day soon ill have some of the happiest things in my life. It's all up to me.


--------------------
R.I.P
Zombi3, Blue Helix
Modest Mouse
Zappa
Slothie
That Kid With The face
ShLong
Le Canard
split_by_nine
& Big Worm Forever
Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many :heart:


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InvisibleMoonshoe
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: Seriously_trippin]
    #22172108 - 09/01/15 12:08 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:hug:


--------------------


Everything I post is fiction.


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InvisibleSirShroomsAlott
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Re: Have you ever wanted to kill yourself? And how would you choose to die if you could pick? [Re: cosmicg]
    #22172611 - 09/01/15 06:06 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

cosmicg said:
I am sorry Shroomery.

I suppose it's just that I feel what you are feeling but have no answer other then to just deal with it.





No need to be sorry, we all interpret things differently.

What would you tell someone who doesn't feel anything, fakes every emotion in every interaction solely because it's easier, who doesnt remember ever being happy before or ever feeling different from the way they do, someone who has been dealing with it for life on a daily basis that made them apathetic and not see a point in anything that turned into a vicious mental loop that makes every train of thought revolve back to "what's the point in any of this"


Just out of curiosity, in a hypothetical like this one, would you tell them someone who has always been dealing with it just to deal with it? Tell them they need to get up or they won't have a home, money, or girlfriend when they spend all day knowing there isn't a point to any of it and have had all those things but there still wasn't a difference. No right or wrong answer, but what would you say to a person like that to make them want to keep going or bother anymore.


You still never answered the OP btw :archiebunker: all forms of dieing seem awful but if you were given the choice in how you would die, whether it be by your hand or something else, what would you pick as the least awful? What is the least worst way to die. Edit: fuck I'm retarded lately, didn't see you actually did, why great whites lol I feel th at woud be slow and painful.

If I could, I'd just pick a sniper from a distance where it would hit before I heard the sound and from behind at a time I didn't specify. Seems quick and painless.


Edited by SirShroomsAlott (09/01/15 06:13 AM)


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