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azur
God of Fuck



Registered: 04/21/12
Posts: 28,103
Loc: Daid
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: CookieCrumbs]
#22164046 - 08/30/15 10:00 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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I don't see anything wrong with what dirtyd said. People suck. That's all. And you should all know that by now.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub



Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: azur]
#22164051 - 08/30/15 10:02 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
azur said: I don't see anything wrong with what dirtyd said. People suck. That's all. And you should all know that by now.
Yeah there's nothing wrong with trivializing an evident problem with what is the equivalent of racism and the hate crimes that it generates.
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Free time is the only time
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azur
God of Fuck



Registered: 04/21/12
Posts: 28,103
Loc: Daid
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: CookieCrumbs] 1
#22164066 - 08/30/15 10:07 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Oh my god. Cry me a river. Get a life and then you'll have your own real issues. OP lives in a shitty little hick town. What happened is to be expected. Some mentalities cannot be changed. So be prepared for it. Can a cowboy walk into a black bar in the hood and not expect trouble? It goes all ways girl.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub



Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: azur]
#22164085 - 08/30/15 10:13 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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That's a fair point. I agree OP should find another place to live.
Still not cool to just say "it happens, get over it." Mentalities do change. On the grand scale they've changed alot in the last 40, 50 years. But they didn't change by people saying "oh well that's just how things are." Problems don't change if they don't get addressed.
Also... a cowboy in the hood is not an appropriate comparison. I'd be surprised if he grew up in the hood for 1 and for 2 he could easily just change his clothes.
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Free time is the only time
Edited by CookieCrumbs (08/30/15 10:16 AM)
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DirdyD


Registered: 12/01/14
Posts: 1,650
Last seen: 3 years, 9 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: azur]
#22164086 - 08/30/15 10:13 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Exactly, Azur.
Only you can be prepared. Nobody can do it for you and just because it ain't right sure as hell doesn't mean it wont happen.
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azur
God of Fuck



Registered: 04/21/12
Posts: 28,103
Loc: Daid
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: CookieCrumbs] 1
#22164121 - 08/30/15 10:24 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
CookieCrumbs said: That's a fair point. I agree OP should find another place to live.
Still not cool to just say "it happens, get over it." Mentalities do change. On the grand scale they've changed alot in the last 40, 50 years. But they didn't change by people saying "oh well that's just how things are." Problems don't change if they don't get addressed.
Also... a cowboy in the hood is not an appropriate comparison. I'd be surprised if he grew up in the hood for 1 and for 2 he could easily just change his clothes.
Cowboy is perfect comparison. Ok, let's say a black cowboy who grew up in the hood returned home and went to the hood bar, he's going to have problems. OP could have changed clothes too.
Mentalities in small towns DON'T change.
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DirdyD


Registered: 12/01/14
Posts: 1,650
Last seen: 3 years, 9 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: azur]
#22164149 - 08/30/15 10:30 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Bout a year ago this girl yelled at me, "My friend wants to fuck you in the ass with a hair brush". Small hick town WalMart parking lot. Guess in their eyes I hold myself a bit gayish? Her friend was a girl.
Ya get all sorts of weird shit in these places.
Edited by DirdyD (08/30/15 10:32 AM)
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Detached
You know where...


Registered: 02/27/15
Posts: 2,942
Last seen: 10 months, 15 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD]
#22164154 - 08/30/15 10:31 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Walmart is a magical place.
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CookieCrumbs
Fucked off to the pub



Registered: 12/10/11
Posts: 14,146
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD]
#22164198 - 08/30/15 10:42 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Free time is the only time
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 22,518
Loc: Mod not God
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD] 1
#22164243 - 08/30/15 10:53 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Indeed Walmart is magical.
Sorry DirdyD for hurting your feelings by pointing out your apparent inability to comprehend what you read. I am sure I would have been nicer to you had you done the same for me.
Zap, when all they had was bad beer and well drinks, I went for the bad beer. PBR is far from good. It isn't like I went, "Oh, yay! They have PBR!!!"
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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ShroomerInTheRye
Clit Commander



Registered: 01/12/12
Posts: 13,036
Loc: Themyscira
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: azur]
#22164258 - 08/30/15 10:58 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
azur said: Mentalities in small towns DON'T change.
But this caveman mentality isn't just in small towns. Its in major metro areas too. I live in a pretty liberal metro area and have many trans friends. They don't feel comfortable outside of the gay bars, and even have to face this shit sometimes in the gay bar.
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<-- Clicky Clicky
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DirdyD


Registered: 12/01/14
Posts: 1,650
Last seen: 3 years, 9 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: Rose]
#22164261 - 08/30/15 11:00 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Certainly didn't hurt my feelings. Annoy, yes. There's a slight difference.
When did I not do that for you prior to your response to my first post? You're not making any sense.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 22,518
Loc: Mod not God
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Quote:
ShroomerInTheRye said:
Quote:
azur said: Mentalities in small towns DON'T change.
But this caveman mentality isn't just in small towns. Its in major metro areas too. I live in a pretty liberal metro area and have many trans friends. They don't feel comfortable outside of the gay bars, and even have to face this shit sometimes in the gay bar.
Outside gay bars can SUCK, because people walking by sure know what the place is and they often jump to conclusions. I have certainly had my share of stink eye and adversity outside such establishments... which sucks for a smoker like me. So, typically I smoke with friends.
I have rarely seen attitude from inside such a place and indeed, I do not get hit on and am free to use whatever restroom I choose.
I have encountered much adversity from the online LGBT community however, but it pales in comparison to what I see outside of it.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD]
#22164395 - 08/30/15 11:36 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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How is she not making any sense? Rose was assaulted for a trivial reason, and if this is a pattern I don't think it is that much of a stretch to just trust her in that people are eager to look for opportunities to antagonize her. Now you're coming in, picking up on some trivial aspect that you think invalidates what she says, and doing what now?
That's shitty Rose. It sounds like you did everything you could. I don't think you're crazy to think that there is more going on here than a grudge over non-payment. Especially if you're there with a party of other paying customers, that's just totally uncalled for in my book.
I'd say write them a dirty review on Yelp, but I don't think that really works with dive bars Sadly that's the type of establishment that is likely to thrive where ignorance does also.
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DirdyD


Registered: 12/01/14
Posts: 1,650
Last seen: 3 years, 9 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: moonrockmushy]
#22164432 - 08/30/15 11:46 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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No. That isnt at all what I was attempting to do. I swear, people wish you were saying some horrible thing just so they can vent some rediculous opinion. Please continue to put words in my mouth and thoughts in my head.
Again, no. I was asking about something specific. And I wasnt saying Rose wasnt making sense with the OP. I was saying her last response didn't make sense. Was not trying to discredit her take on the situation.
I've never not given anyone a chance to clarify. Thats a dick move and I'm not a dick, as much as people would love to make me out to be. No nonsense, yes. Dick, no.
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moonrockmushy
High on Spite



Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 19,067
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD]
#22164453 - 08/30/15 11:52 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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And she's not saying that anyone with a problem with trans women is necessarily violent, that is your words in her mouth.
You don't need to clarify, it would probably be better if you just dropped it because this isn't really the place to talk about how some people who disagree with the idea that people can choose to identify their own gender are actually not violent. We all know that, but there is a common thread of hatred that creates an environment where trans people are 2nd class citizens, which is very unshroomy behavior.
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SirShroomsAlott
Howdy



Registered: 05/15/14
Posts: 6,945
Loc: United States
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: Rose] 1
#22164467 - 08/30/15 11:54 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Damn reading this story made me sad and disgusted at what assholes people can be. Sorry that kind of shit happens to you for no good reason
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 22,518
Loc: Mod not God
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD]
#22164470 - 08/30/15 11:54 AM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Dirdy,
I was just giving you a little shit because you made some claims that were easily refuted had you read the damn thread before replying. You got a little butthurt over my comment. You will live.
It is clear you are not in full melt mode here. You are making a big thing out of a small one though.
You just tried to put some blame on me in a way I had already shown to be inaccurate. Then you got defensive when I stood up for myself.
I know admitting you are wrong on the internet is a hard thing to do so I won't expect you to do it.
Really though, I am not mad at you or anything. Just learn to take a little chiding. It beats having to take a punch.
I will go back to your post in question and qive it a less snarky reply, ok?
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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Rose
Devil's Advocate



Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 22,518
Loc: Mod not God
Last seen: 1 year, 6 months
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: DirdyD] 1
#22164521 - 08/30/15 12:04 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
DirdyD said:
Quote:
Rose said: This, "You're not really a woman mentality" is killing us in real life.
I'll start by saying I have no qualms with anyone doing anything that they'd like as long as it doesn't involve mucking up someone else's life.
But what does someone's opinion of whether they truly consider a trans person their intended sex have to do with this assault or being assaulted in general?
You're not saying that just because someone doesn't agree that you're truly a female, it automatically makes them violent and associated with the folks that roughed you up, are yah?
Sorry about what happened. Life is hard, no matter who you are.
If you say you have no qualms... that is when I prepare myself for you to list some qualms. I was not disappointed.
In my first post I detailed why being a trans woman can lead to trouble. People who consider me to still be male treat me like a man. They feel they still have the right to rough me up. But they didn't do this to me when they saw me as a man. Only now that they see me as trans.
Case and point? They never laid a finger on my screaming wife. She was treated like a woman.
They never asked me to leave before grabbing me and forcing me away from my group. They likely would not have done that to a person they considered a woman or even a man. Not while they were on the clock at least.
I never said people are automatically violent towards me if they don't believe I am female.
In fact, I don't entirely believe I am female. I have WAY more experience as a male. I am not one to argue about the merits of my legitimacy as a woman, unlike certain other trans Shroomerites. All I know is I am far from the man I once was. I have a woman's musculature and that makes any violent male act against me unfair.
Life is hard for everyone? No shit. It is also, harder in certain ways after transition than it was before. Trust me. I know.
-------------------- Fiddlesticks.
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DirdyD


Registered: 12/01/14
Posts: 1,650
Last seen: 3 years, 9 days
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Re: A Trans Woman Walks Into a Bar... [Re: Rose]
#22164614 - 08/30/15 12:30 PM (8 years, 4 months ago) |
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No. How many times do I need to say this until you actually believe me? Anyways, but Rose, if youre the type to use terms like "melt" and "butthurt" in interactions on the web, there really isnt much else to say.
Other than hopeless. Y'all are immature, hopeless internet people and I honestly don't feel bad for the shit you get yourselves into IRL. A little bit of common sense and perspective goes a very long way. I dont suggest you take the illogic that flies online into your daily life.
Oh, and the nature of a question is one that answers can be made. And there's no damn way I'm reading through 7 pages of crappy net commentary just to reference the OP. That isnt so hard to understand, is it? I'd hope neither is the fact that elaborating on points isnt a sign of "melting", but actual elaboration. But I'm pretty sure y'all know this, but you'd rather act like middle schoolers.
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