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Anonymous #1

Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college?
    #22129811 - 08/23/15 07:37 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I moved in on friday, and have only met a few people. One being my roommate, who I've actually grown pretty close to over the past few days. I've been smoking weed everyday with him (even though I don't actually enjoy smoking that much) just in the off chance that I'd meet some stoners, who are usually the people I get along with the best. But so far I've smoked with only 2 other people, who I didn't seem to click with.

I thought at college there was going to be parties on every floor of every dorm, every night! but sadly, I didnt see a single party after walking around the campus last night. Its a shame because alcohol really helps me meet people and introduce myself.

What I really hate is that the West side of my campus is known for being the party crowd. The people there are more open and friendly. Not introverts. I walked over there to see an old friend and I met like three people in the span of five minutes. But of course, I'm on the east side of campus, and these dorms are known for being quiet. I applied for any of the dorms on the West campus but for some reason they gave me an east side one. What the fuck man?

Every night I've just been laying in bed wanting to go home, see my family and friends, who I actually have things in common with. One of my favorite things to do is trip with my friends, be it mushrooms, mdma or acid, but I haven't met a single person that is interested in tripping (besides my roommate). Does noone at college like to take psychedelics?

So will college get better? because I'm starting to get real depressed in this enviorment, and I am seriously dreading the next few months.

This is suny oswego by the way


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Anonymous #2

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22130002 - 08/23/15 08:54 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

LOL, dude. Did you really just ask this question after moving into the dorm three days ago? If so, then CALM THE FUCK DOWN, *SLAP SLAP SLAP*, you're hysterical. People are probably trying to figure out what they need to do to not flunk out, and you should not be worried about not being a party animal. Get your priorities in order or you won't need any friends in college because you won't be there long. Also, it takes longer than 3 days to make friends or to learn where the campus center is, so chill out and stop being so needy.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #22130024 - 08/23/15 08:58 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I just thought that you were supposed to absolutley love college from the get go. Thats what I've been told at least. And if college satys this way I can't imagine myself being happy


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Anonymous #3

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22130036 - 08/23/15 09:03 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

You're 3 days in and you've already made a friend and hung out with other people.  You haven't even started classes yet.

Relax.


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Anonymous #2

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1] * 1
    #22130085 - 08/23/15 09:18 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
I just thought that you were supposed to absolutley love college from the get go. Thats what I've been told at least. And if college satys this way I can't imagine myself being happy




It's a life experience, not a year-long party. Don't get too hyped up about anything people tell you about college. Think of it as a slightly more mature extension of highschool and that will give you about the right expectation. It will take months and years to get the social environment figured out well, and people are still just settling in with their roommates. You need to relax and stay the course for a while. In the first year people tend to visit home alot and feel separated from their families and that kind of stuff. They also tend to fuck up and not manage their responsibilities well by doing things like partying before classes start (a bad move). This panic that you're feeling will subside in a week or so, and the whole social environment will change after people get used to living on campus and going to classes and that shit. Quit panicking and play some video games with your roommate or something. Leave the door open while you play them if you've got extra controllers and people will step in to play with you guys. Don't light up a bowl if you do that though. Honestly, you should back off on the pot culture until you feel out your new environment a bit more (and I say this as a lover of the spice).


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Anonymous #4

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22130951 - 08/23/15 01:33 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Give it time man. Things will fall into place. Just be yourself and once the hectic start of the year has passed things will happen. Get your stuff together first. Don't really worry about the parties they will come. Do things you enjoy doing, most people I've met at school if they see you doing something they enjoy doing as well will come and talk to you about it.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #22132522 - 08/23/15 07:30 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

When I was a freshman 12 years ago there was about a 10 block party the first 3 days of school. It was quite the culture shock.  It has been ranked the #1 party school in the nation by a few magazines a number of times.  I know there not completely accurate but I've been to alot of universities and the one I attended dwarfed all the others in terms of partying and general shenanigans.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #22132589 - 08/23/15 07:52 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I can't fucking stand it anymore. Here I am, 9:45 on a sunday night, listening out my window to what sounds like hundreds of drunken screams and laughs, and people having a good time. How do I go out and do what they're doing? How did these people establish groups already? I wish I wasn't such a pussy and could just go out there and introduce myself to one of these passing groups.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22132702 - 08/23/15 08:24 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Ask random people in your dorm if there going to any good parties or bars. And tell them your trying to find something to get into.  I noticed this to be the best way to meet people at the dorms I stayed at in college.  The best people to ask are people who live in the rooms next to yours.  Also just go introduce yourself to the people living in the rooms next to yours.  I bet almost all of them will be welcoming. Just be friendly.

Don't be a creep and don't smell like shit either.  Don't tell people your name is Tony Danza.

If you got some green ask people if they want to smoke.

It's hard the first few days being in a new place. It will get better. You'll meet people. Pinky promise.


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Anonymous #6

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #22134594 - 08/24/15 09:07 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

People are just now moving in and shit. Give it time. Wait until school starts. Join clubs also if you have to. Look out for those Thursday (end of the school week for most), Friday, and Saturday night festivities :smile:


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Anonymous #7

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22135197 - 08/24/15 12:02 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
I can't fucking stand it anymore. Here I am, 9:45 on a sunday night, listening out my window to what sounds like hundreds of drunken screams and laughs, and people having a good time. How do I go out and do what they're doing? How did these people establish groups already? I wish I wasn't such a pussy and could just go out there and introduce myself to one of these passing groups.




College is about your studies and future, not parties.

You're already out of the party loop, there's going to a lot of Friday night sober jerk off sessions in your future, learn to embrace it. :thumbup:


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Anonymous #8

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #22135727 - 08/24/15 02:29 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Find a coffee shop or something near campus, preferably something that does music, and hang out. You'll meet more chill people there, but also some prententious art fags.

Any kind of music venue works. Just look around for flyers of shows and shit.

Otherwise just show up to a frat party with a bunch of beer.

But you do want to minimize partying in favor of studying and getting to class on time. Not saying don't do it, but a small gathering of people smoking some pot and having a 6-pack each is way more conducive to you waking up on time the next day than an all-night rager.

Remember, this isn't public-funded, it's on your dime, whether you're paying it right now or not. Don't spend an extra $10,000 or more to party for a year. You can party way cheaper.


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Anonymous #8

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #22135763 - 08/24/15 02:34 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Also, those people you see and hear partying their first week aren't freshmen. They already knew people from before.


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Anonymous #5

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #22136975 - 08/24/15 06:55 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #8 said:
Also, those people you see and hear partying their first week aren't freshmen. They already knew people from before.




Why would you say that?  When I was a freshman almost all of my fellow freshman partied the first weekend.  I'm sure a lot are upper classmen but to say freshman aren't out there partying is foolish.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #22141479 - 08/25/15 03:49 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Wow nevermind I've met alot of cool people these past two days. And like 5 minutes ago some juniors knocked on my door and said there was an open party tonight at one of the frat houses. Its amazing how fast things can turn around for the better. Thanks for all the help guys I really appreciate it


Edited by Anonymous (08/25/15 04:21 PM)


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Anonymous #5

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1] * 5
    #22141830 - 08/25/15 04:52 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Ya brah it was bound to happen your one of the swankest people at that college. Your one slick cat with an attitude to match.


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Anonymous #7

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22143182 - 08/25/15 09:04 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #1 said:
Wow nevermind I've met alot of cool people these past two days. And like 5 minutes ago some juniors knocked on my door and said there was an open party tonight at one of the frat houses. Its amazing how fast things can turn around for the better. Thanks for all the help guys I really appreciate it




You're at college to get an education, it's not about getting intoxicated and having sex, don't piss your tuition away.


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Anonymous #9

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22143952 - 08/25/15 11:51 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

For some reason I get the feeling Anon 1 is at PSU, if so message me back. ~ Infinitetoker.  One Love.


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Anonymous #1

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #22146860 - 08/26/15 02:30 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

No at a SUNY school


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Anonymous #10

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #22147318 - 08/26/15 03:53 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

You're going to have to fake it.  Just go up and talk to people and pretend that your cool with out over doing it.  That get's you in and not being a fucking weirdo is how you stay.


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Anonymous #9

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #10]
    #22149999 - 08/27/15 06:27 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

LMAO- very true.:thatsayes:


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Anonymous #11

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #9] * 1
    #22163270 - 08/30/15 01:49 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Looks like you're doomed op, may as well throw in the towel and just hide under a bridge.  Maybe someone will feed you crackers, that will be your life from now on.


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Anonymous #9

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #11]
    #22164567 - 08/30/15 12:15 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

:canthelpbutlaugh:


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Anonymous #12

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #22185086 - 09/03/15 09:05 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Ya you gotta be careful. I didn't make any friends at college and now I regret it now that I'm out.


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Anonymous #13

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #12]
    #22190437 - 09/04/15 09:40 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Dude get a nice girl, bang some pussy. Make a few trustworthy friends

I sure as shit wouldn't give a fuck about partying with all that strange walking around
Never met a girl that didn't drink.
It's not about the quantity of people, you want to actually KNOW them first.


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Anonymous #9

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #13]
    #22191788 - 09/05/15 08:48 AM (8 years, 4 months ago)

exactly you basically meet a person OP. You or they initiate conversation.  Might take a bit of effort to say hello to someone....Hard I know.

Then you start talking about different interests, you conversation can have no direction or you can take cues from what the person is wearing, doing, etc.  ex.  Oh is see you have a Jimi Hendrix shirt on...I fucking love his music....


You get to know the person right there, exchange emails and plans to do a common activity ( or you are feeling adventurous and take up one of their interests) and in turn make friends with that persons friends....


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Anonymous #14

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #9]
    #22202953 - 09/07/15 04:24 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Dude college is easy as fuck to meet people. How do you get to be at the party?

You just fucking show up with a beer in your hand, pull out a bong and a bag and suddenly your cool man.

Most of the people feel like you, and are nervous too. Thats just normal.

But if you break the ice, it encourages others to do so


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Anonymous #15

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #14]
    #22247823 - 09/16/15 08:12 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Everyone already gave you plenty of good advice. I'm just here wishing you the best in your studies and future. Enjoy college while you can because it goes by very quick and life after college really fuckin sucks!


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Anonymous #14

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #22262868 - 09/19/15 11:45 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Everyone already gave you plenty of good advice. I'm just here wishing you the best in your studies and future. Enjoy college while you can because it goes by very quick and life after college really fuckin sucks!





Life only sucks after college if you get into an industry or job that you don't like. And if all that matters in your life is doing drugs


Personally, i wake up before my alarm clock and work is the highlight of my day.

College was just an excuse for me to spend more time dicking around and doing drugs. I have a degree but have never used it.

I don't care though. I had to make a lot of mistakes to get to where i am at today.


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Anonymous #15

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #14]
    #22275289 - 09/22/15 05:25 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #14 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Everyone already gave you plenty of good advice. I'm just here wishing you the best in your studies and future. Enjoy college while you can because it goes by very quick and life after college really fuckin sucks!





Life only sucks after college if you get into an industry or job that you don't like. And if all that matters in your life is doing drugs


Personally, i wake up before my alarm clock and work is the highlight of my day.

College was just an excuse for me to spend more time dicking around and doing drugs. I have a degree but have never used it.

I don't care though. I had to make a lot of mistakes to get to where i am at today.




Uh no real life sucks whether you have the job you want or not. I graduated in molecular biology and I'm doing what I love working in a lab. Shit gets real once ur out in the world and really on your own. I make bank right now and my job is the greatest but I would trade that in to be in college again.

Your only worry in college is your school work that's it! It sounds more like you wasted your college experience dicking around and doing drugs.


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Anonymous #14

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #22279942 - 09/23/15 06:02 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #14 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Everyone already gave you plenty of good advice. I'm just here wishing you the best in your studies and future. Enjoy college while you can because it goes by very quick and life after college really fuckin sucks!





Life only sucks after college if you get into an industry or job that you don't like. And if all that matters in your life is doing drugs


Personally, i wake up before my alarm clock and work is the highlight of my day.

College was just an excuse for me to spend more time dicking around and doing drugs. I have a degree but have never used it.

I don't care though. I had to make a lot of mistakes to get to where i am at today.




Uh no real life sucks whether you have the job you want or not. I graduated in molecular biology and I'm doing what I love working in a lab. Shit gets real once ur out in the world and really on your own. I make bank right now and my job is the greatest but I would trade that in to be in college again.

Your only worry in college is your school work that's it! It sounds more like you wasted your college experience dicking around and doing drugs.





Real life does not suck.

You suck. You say that you are doing what you 'love', i highly doubt that.

The worst part about college is going to class.


'shit gets real'

:canthelpbutlaugh:

more like you are slacking ass at your job. If you really 'loved' what you are doing, you would outperform all of your colleagues. And you would fucking WANT to do that. Because you LOVE what you are doing

I show up to work early, and am usually the last one to leave. And i am the lowest on the totem pole at my company.

I pick up everyone else's slack. Because i am not here to get a paycheck, I am here to rise to the top. And i love what i am doing.

you are just a punk with a degree.


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Anonymous #15

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #14]
    #22281173 - 09/23/15 09:10 PM (8 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #14 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #14 said:
Quote:

Anonymous #15 said:
Everyone already gave you plenty of good advice. I'm just here wishing you the best in your studies and future. Enjoy college while you can because it goes by very quick and life after college really fuckin sucks!





Life only sucks after college if you get into an industry or job that you don't like. And if all that matters in your life is doing drugs


Personally, i wake up before my alarm clock and work is the highlight of my day.

College was just an excuse for me to spend more time dicking around and doing drugs. I have a degree but have never used it.

I don't care though. I had to make a lot of mistakes to get to where i am at today.




Uh no real life sucks whether you have the job you want or not. I graduated in molecular biology and I'm doing what I love working in a lab. Shit gets real once ur out in the world and really on your own. I make bank right now and my job is the greatest but I would trade that in to be in college again.

Your only worry in college is your school work that's it! It sounds more like you wasted your college experience dicking around and doing drugs.





Real life does not suck.

You suck. You say that you are doing what you 'love', i highly doubt that.

The worst part about college is going to class.


'shit gets real'

:canthelpbutlaugh:

more like you are slacking ass at your job. If you really 'loved' what you are doing, you would outperform all of your colleagues. And you would fucking WANT to do that. Because you LOVE what you are doing

I show up to work early, and am usually the last one to leave. And i am the lowest on the totem pole at my company.

I pick up everyone else's slack. Because i am not here to get a paycheck, I am here to rise to the top. And i love what i am doing.

you are just a punk with a degree.



Ok... whatever dude. You don't know anything about me or what I do or how hard I work. All I was trying to say is that college was easy and things get real and more difficult when you leave. I'm saying life sucks for other reasons but obviously I struck a nerve since you replied back with insults and you seem so bitter. Anyway good luck to you and I hope you make your way to the top, wherever that is.


Edited by Anonymous (09/23/15 09:13 PM)


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Anonymous #14

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #22329458 - 10/03/15 05:22 PM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Keep telling yourself that you 'love what you are doing'

its obviously not true.


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Anonymous #15

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #14]
    #22332005 - 10/04/15 10:08 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Anonymous #14 said:
Keep telling yourself that you 'love what you are doing'

its obviously not true.



Hahahah here we go again... :facepalm3: I thought this thread was over days ago.


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Anonymous #16

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #15]
    #22366464 - 10/12/15 01:22 AM (8 years, 3 months ago)

I actually enjoyed studying topics with class mates on my own time, but I also find my career in technology extremely interesting, so I was nerdy in that way.

I partied / got suspended the first year in my dorms, living off campus and embracing education and relationships without booze and drugs was much better, and got me a fuck of a lot farther in life.

:zoidberg:


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Anonymous #17

Re: Why am I having such a hard time making friends at college? [Re: Anonymous #16]
    #22378404 - 10/14/15 12:36 PM (8 years, 3 months ago)

College is all about education. Don't piss your chance away on a college degree, a fine job and living a rich life by trying to be the Cool Guy.
So study hard and 'relax' once in a while.

Don't think college is a place where it's booze, pussy and drugs all day long.

You'll quickly meet some people who might become your friends. Just don't be a weird paranoid stoner.


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