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Offlineakosi
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Registered: 03/08/15
Posts: 51
Last seen: 8 years, 2 months
Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Acaterpillar]
    #22126827 - 08/22/15 01:17 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

be careful where you tread, treat him how you would like to be treated yourself, ya know?


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OfflineShiVersblood
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: akosi]
    #22126983 - 08/22/15 01:32 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Could have posted this in , Ladies night, sub forum.  I would say don't date the guy he is already was with your friend it would be more messy than worth it at this point.


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OfflineQuit The Cult
World is yours

Registered: 11/12/14
Posts: 265
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: ShiVersblood] * 1
    #22127025 - 08/22/15 01:41 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah tbh i think OP needs to get in control of herself. Talking about some triflin ass shit. Haha.

Ive been attracted to some of my girls friends in the past. But i wouldnt even consider acting upon it because i have respect for myself and my girl. Cheating is cheating. Dump your dude if you wanna fuck his friend. Simple as that.


--------------------
Ill always have typos. Using a shitty phone to write on here.


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Offlinesun_spots
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Acaterpillar] * 1
    #22127157 - 08/22/15 01:56 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Acaterpillar said:
Quote:

sun_spots said:
I couldn't care less if my friends wanted to date my exes.  I'd question their judgment, but it wouldn't hurt my feelings.



You must compartmentalize your emotions well.

Envy? Pity?
I dunno;
Has that never backfired on you before?




I'm not sure what you're getting at here.  If I am no longer with someone, regardless of who dumped whom, there's a good reason for it.  So why would I be offended by them moving on?


--------------------
ShiVersblood said:
shut ur fucking mouth. before a penis is are be enters

LordSenate said:
Cheese poop... Who gives a fuck gotta eat lots of cheese.


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OfflineAcaterpillar
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: sun_spots]
    #22127289 - 08/22/15 02:27 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I think I envy you


--------------------
Aaa...E I O Uuu...A E I O Uuu..A E I O uh Uuu..
*Cough* *Cough*
Ooo...U E I O Aaa...U E I Aaa..A E I O Uuuuu...

At first sight, The Perfection of Wisdom is bewildering, full of paradox and apparent irrationality.


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OfflineInfiniteToker
Devourer of Chicken Wings
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: burningstar06]
    #22127302 - 08/22/15 02:30 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

That's so sad and your boyfriend seems rather pathetic to me.  :raisemyglass:  ( Cheer's to Sex)


--------------------
 

"I'm chilling in a room with a view, there's always room for improvement; so i grab my coat and go and prove it"-Method Man


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Offlineburningstar06
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: InfiniteToker]
    #22129427 - 08/23/15 02:02 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Well so this is my events for today. My boyfriend said a few days ago several times he was fine with me hanging out with him I wasn't going to do anything because I do love myboyfriend I have very strong feelings for him but anyways me and his friend hung out today and we talked and I was kinda high and said a few things about my boyfriend being controlling and whatnot because my boyfriend was getting jealous that I was hanging out with his friend he was sending me texts like lie to him and tell him you have to go home or if your not home by 7:30 it's over shit like that and his friend was starting to talk about things like if he ever hits you I want to know and I was uncomfortable with it because we do get into fist fights. So my boyfriend started ignoring me and texting his friend instead. I was at his friends aunts house where we usually all hang out and we were all drinking. Well his friend started bringing up the whole beating on women thing and they talked about that for like an hour while still drinking and when my boyfriend said that it was none of his friends biusness and wouldn't answer his friend if he hits me or not they ended up getting into a fist fight over it.....

So after about 20 mins of wrestling and fist fighting my boyfriends friends cousins broke it up and we went down the street only to find my be didn't have his phone so we pulled over and I walked back to find it but it wasn't there so my boyfriend and his friend ended up talking alone in the car for a good 30-45 mins and I'm not sure what was said or anything but now I'm home and yeah wtf :/

His friend basically tried to beat up my boyfriend because he found out he was hitting me and earlier in the day offered me a place to stay if I needed one soooo I don't know what I'm going to do now I'm stressing about a lot and not just this and I have to get up in the morning for my first job and then do 6 hours at my other job fuck my life
I had no idea he would react like that I never out right said he hits me but he figured it out after the long convo he had with my bf so shit went down

And I know I have to get my shit together I'm just stuck between a rock and a hard place.


--------------------
:mushroom2::stoned::mushroom2:


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: burningstar06] * 1
    #22129462 - 08/23/15 02:22 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

First, 20 minutes of fist fighting? You've got to be exaggerating. My longest fight covered my entire house from back door to front door to back door with me and my brother slamming each other's faces into everything (in between the actual fists) from the outside looking in, we were trying to kill each other. That whole fight lasted just a few minutes tops, it ended because neither of us could keep going. Not to say it's impossible to go a full 20 minutes, but very few people are really built for that type of thing outside of professional sports.

Anyways: I don't even know where to start on this. I really don't. I just see so much wrong here, I don't know how to go about addressing it. So I'll do it line by line.

Quote:

My boyfriend said a few days ago several times he was fine with me hanging out with him I wasn't going to do anything



Just like I said on the first page. If he was serious about the threesome, doing it would be a huge mistake. He has severe control and jealousy issues and someone like that absolutely could not handle such a thing.
Quote:

because I do love myboyfriend I have very strong feelings for him



Another "I said". You may not care as much as you think you do. Sure in the beginning it might suck to break up with him, but months down the line you'll look back on it and wonder why you never did it sooner
Quote:

my boyfriend was getting jealous that I was hanging out with his friend he was sending me texts like lie to him and tell him you have to go home or if your not home by 7:30 it's over



next time stay out all night, for two reasons. One to show he has no control over you, and two maybe he might actually follow through with it
Quote:

his friend was starting to talk about things like if he ever hits you I want to know and I was uncomfortable with it



This one comes in a bit later, but there you go, a possible way out. Don't even have to date him. If he's truly got a problem with it, I'm sure he wouldn't mind taking you in while you get your shit straight
Quote:

Well his friend started bringing up the whole beating on women thing and they talked about that for like an hour while still drinking and when my boyfriend said that it was none of his friends biusness and wouldn't answer his friend if he hits me or not they ended up getting into a fist fight over it.....



Friend obviously cares enough, see above
Quote:

his friend ended up talking alone in the car for a good 30-45 mins and I'm not sure what was said or anything but now I'm home and yeah wtf :/



Don't worry about what was said. Friend was most likely telling boyfriend he needs to get his fucking shit straight
Quote:

and earlier in the day offered me a place to stay if I needed one soooo I don't know what I'm going to do now I'm stressing about a lot and not just this and I have to get up in the morning for my first job and then do 6 hours at my other job fuck my life
I had no idea he would react like that I never out right said he hits me but he figured it out after the long convo he had with my bf so shit went down



Then wtf is the problem?
Quote:

And I know I have to get my shit together I'm just stuck between a rock and a hard place.



Yes you do and no you aren't. The only difficulty is the one you're making for yourself. Is this the life you want to live? Do you think your boyfriend is just going to flip a switch and change? That's a pipe dream. It happens, but it's rare that it does. All of this shit is just going to keep happening. Stop clinging to a dead end.

Leave the prick, yesterday. Worry about what comes next or how you're going to make it later. Your life won't change until you change it. When I was a retail manager one my employees "had to quit" because of her boyfriend being the same kinda prick yours is. He actually showed up at the store to tell her she's not working whenever he felt like it. Perhaps he was too afraid she'd become dependent and not put up with this shit anymore. Whatever the reason was, it caused a huge scene and she never showed up for work again. This is quite possibly your future.

Seriously pack your shit and leave.

Right now you seriously have an out. Just keep staying with him and hoping for the best and end up actually getting pregnant (and don't say it won't/couldn't happen) and then you're really going to be fucked. Moving out/on becomes exponentially harder. It's not ideal but you can sleep in a car or on a friends couch and hardly ever eat, but be free to go find a job to get out of that situation. If a child comes along, you're going to be pretty well fucked. You have no work experience, you're not going to be able to afford a baby sitter and pay rent/bills/food. Babysitters (unless you just happen to know a person willing to do it) basically charge what minimum wage is. So you're working for nothing. Need a baby sitter for 8 hours 5 days a week? You're going to have to work 8 hours a day 5 days a week to cover it.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


Edited by Shroomslip (08/23/15 03:52 AM)


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InvisibleHobozen
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Registered: 11/03/11
Posts: 10,634
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: burningstar06]
    #22129569 - 08/23/15 04:00 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

BFs friend threw himself out there for you... if you like him, which it seems you do, just go for it..  I'm guessing you're scared of change, considering your scattered childhood and the fact that you've been with this one guyfor years.  But you gotta buck up and do this for yourself, because what you got now is clearly not a sustainable plan.  If you miss this opportunity you'll probably be kicking yourself in the ass down the road.  Do you really wanna be the couple that doesn't have sex?  You're only 23 for Christ's sake, that shits for old people. This is only going to get worse, and the emotional baggage and the games are going to keep piling up until you get into another fight where he makes fun of your family and you finally break and leave his pathetic ass, except then you wont have the out you do now.  Seize the opportunity girl, this could turn out really fun for you.


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InvisibleHobozen
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Hobozen]
    #22129579 - 08/23/15 04:10 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

"The difference between seizing the opportunity when it strikes and missing it often determines whether you make it in life or you do not."


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Invisiblethelanzii

Registered: 11/13/12
Posts: 5,434
Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Hobozen]
    #22129607 - 08/23/15 04:44 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

you only get fucked once a month in a relationship????
fuck that wtfff


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: thelanzii]
    #22129613 - 08/23/15 04:51 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Sex isn't everything. After so long it just doesn't mean what it used to. Though at such a young age, it is pretty odd and should be a red flag.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleSham87
mashAllah
Male

Registered: 05/16/11
Posts: 9,818
Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: thelanzii]
    #22129619 - 08/23/15 04:56 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have a feeling OP is not being completely honest, there is always two sides to the story...


--------------------
:mushroom2::sun::crazy2::leaf:




...once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest places if you look at it right...



:feelsgoatman:


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Sham87]
    #22129632 - 08/23/15 05:16 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Sham87 said:
I have a feeling OP is not being completely honest, there is always two sides to the story...



Very true, but if she is only sharing half truths, it's still a relationship that should of been ended long ago. She could just be playing victim, but everything she says her BF has done, is enough to just leave. Even if she is completely lying, the argument to leave still stands. If she were willing to lie (and I'm not saying you are OP just for the record) about this shit, they still shouldn't be together. He shouldn't be subjected to such slandering and backhandedness.

No matter how you look at it, this is a relationship that should not continue existing. Whether it's for her sake or his.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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OfflineMatt87
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Registered: 01/03/15
Posts: 3,339
Loc: Tennessee
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Janky Tits]
    #22129685 - 08/23/15 06:07 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Xplicit RelapzZ said:
Really this could be your dream come true. Get shagged by your boyfriend and his best friend lol. Sounds like a fun time for you



Till the friend has a way bigger dick/lasts longer. Then boyfriend will act extra crazy!


--------------------

Once you understand the way broadly, you see it in all things. -Musashi


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OfflineMatt87
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: Matt87]
    #22129687 - 08/23/15 06:08 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

People have made great points in this thread. Shroomslip in particular.


--------------------

Once you understand the way broadly, you see it in all things. -Musashi


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OfflineInfiniteToker
Devourer of Chicken Wings
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: burningstar06]
    #22129761 - 08/23/15 07:11 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I in no way condone violence in relationships or in an y other circumstance but to defend oneself or family....But you definitely are an instigator. 

You are playing both sides whether you were given permission for you boyfriend to hang with his friend or not.   

You stated that
Quote:

burningstar06 said:
his friend hung out today and we talked and I was kinda high and said a few things about my boyfriend being controlling and whatnot b




You are the cause of some of this as well (not the violence towards you though), and if you do go with the boyfriends friend, you will have sunk to an all-time low in my opinion.


--------------------
 

"I'm chilling in a room with a view, there's always room for improvement; so i grab my coat and go and prove it"-Method Man


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OfflineMacey Howard
Formally MOE HOWARD
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Registered: 07/02/99
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: InfiniteToker]
    #22129775 - 08/23/15 07:17 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Yep, your man is ready to flush you babes. If he is willing to do a three-some, it means he's got some other girl on the menu.

Just saying..


--------------------
Hugs and Kisses!


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: InfiniteToker]
    #22129799 - 08/23/15 07:31 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

First and foremost, I am not a white knight. I just see a flaw I can't overlook. 

:awesketch: Instigating because she hung out with someone (friend of his or friend hers doesn't really matter)? She's a human being, she shouldn't have to bow down to his jealousy and isolate herself because of his insecurities. Or was it the fact that she decided to open up about abuse currently going on? Are you saying that shit should just be kept behind closed doors? No one just runs to the cops in those situations. They talk to people, because somewhere deep down (for whatever reason) they need to be told it's not okay. Actually they need it pounded in their fucking head because even when the first person tells them it's not okay, they keep making excuses for it, such as "I really care about him".

Whatever way you spin what you quoted, does not make her an instigator. You don't have the knowledge to prove what she's saying is bullshit, by all we have to go on, she is not an instigator. Definition of instigator: "a person who brings about or initiates something." Tell me at what point in this thread can you prove she brought about or initiated any of it. Let's suspend disbelief and assumption. Boyfriend beat her. He is the one who instigated it. Threesome? Boyfriend brought it up. He again was the instigator. FFS boyfriend told her that his friend thinks she's hot. Instigating.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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Offlinesun_spots
Good boob day
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Registered: 02/27/10
Posts: 14,306
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Re: When you have a major crush on ur boyfriends good friend.... LADY'S help [Re: burningstar06] * 1
    #22129857 - 08/23/15 07:58 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

OK, there's violence in this relationship.  That is completely unacceptable.  I suggest you take the advice of pretty much everyone in this thread who is telling you to leave.  Once you put some distance between yourself and this situation, you'll be able to see how very unhealthy the relationship was.


--------------------
ShiVersblood said:
shut ur fucking mouth. before a penis is are be enters

LordSenate said:
Cheese poop... Who gives a fuck gotta eat lots of cheese.


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