Home | Community | Message Board


This site includes paid links. Please support our sponsors.


Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Shop: Original Sensible Seeds Autoflowering Cannabis Seeds   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals   Kraken Kratom Kratom Capsules for Sale   PhytoExtractum Buy Bali Kratom Powder

Jump to first unread post Pages: 1 | 2 | 3  [ show all ]
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
I think I have BDP
    #22084581 - 08/13/15 02:43 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Can anyone help diagnose?
I've come to believe that crying and slapping myself isn't normal.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22084604 - 08/13/15 02:53 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Read 'They f**k you up' by James Oliver. If that doesn't make it clearer, I doubt much else will, outside of a diagnosis by a psychiatrist. And I can't say I exactly trust them. Certainly not more than I trust myself.

It truly is an incredible book, and covers the condition, and it's origins in great detail.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineLaughingcowwa
Your mum loves it.
Male


Registered: 05/02/15
Posts: 418
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22084611 - 08/13/15 02:55 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Go to a Dr, hows anyone supposed to diagnose anything by you just saying you have this or that.


--------------------
Those who doubt me, suck cock by choice


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Identifying BDP? [Re: Laughingcowwa]
    #22084637 - 08/13/15 03:03 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I am booked in the doctors tomorrow morning but I wanted to ask about similar experiences with other people beforehand.

What behaviors indicate BPD?
Borderline Personality Disorder.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleSun King
 User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 02/15/14
Posts: 4,069
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22084653 - 08/13/15 03:08 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I think you have dyslexia.


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Sun King]
    #22084659 - 08/13/15 03:11 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Good for you.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineHippocampus
 User Gallery


Registered: 04/01/15
Posts: 753
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22084678 - 08/13/15 03:19 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Just look it up online.  There is a list of 9 things that you must fit at least 5.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Hippocampus]
    #22084775 - 08/13/15 04:09 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I got 35 on this test.
http://psychcentral.com/cgi-bin/borderline.cgi

4 symptoms on this one
http://www.bpddemystified.com/resources/online-test/result/

and suspected BDP on this one
http://www.counseling-office.com/surveys/survey_b.php

Yes these where online but I've been documenting my emotional health for the past year and I have a good idea of how I've felt and the behaviors I've expressed.

I don't see the harm in talking to a psychiatrist. I'd like a professional opinion and i'd like to be certain that I don't have it.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinepineapple3


Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 547
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22084859 - 08/13/15 04:42 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

But they give Antipsychotics or Mood stabilizers to people with BDP.

Antipsychotics being the most common, Antipsychotics = the opposite effect of psychedelics = ????
psychedlics = agonist on receptor
Antipsychotics = antagonist


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: pineapple3]
    #22084878 - 08/13/15 04:52 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Shrooms aid at giving me antipsychotic behaviors.

I believe think antipsychotic medicine might be helpful.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineHippocampus
 User Gallery


Registered: 04/01/15
Posts: 753
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22084892 - 08/13/15 05:02 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I got 35 on this test.
http://psychcentral.com/cgi-bin/borderline.cgi





I got 8


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinepineapple3


Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 547
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22085035 - 08/13/15 06:27 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
Shrooms aid at giving me antipsychotic behaviors.

I believe think antipsychotic medicine might be helpful.



but shrooms = increase/allow serotonin and two dopamine receptors ...

anti psychotics on the other hand block it all...




Edited by pineapple3 (08/13/15 06:42 AM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: pineapple3]
    #22085044 - 08/13/15 06:33 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I was often the calmest I've ever felt on shrooms.
I could keep up with my ecstatic thoughts.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinepineapple3


Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 547
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22085063 - 08/13/15 06:42 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I was often the calmest I've ever felt on shrooms.
I could keep up with my ecstatic thoughts.



Well I'm not that clever so I can't help you sorry, but you said your going to a shrink tomorrow, they'll sort you out.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: pineapple3]
    #22085070 - 08/13/15 06:46 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I appreciate the thought. I hadn't thought about anti psychotics before you mentioned it. I'll find out and report when I've found out.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Offlinepineapple3


Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 547
Last seen: 3 years, 8 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22085086 - 08/13/15 06:53 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I appreciate the thought. I hadn't thought about anti psychotics before you mentioned it. I'll find out and report when I've found out.




but the anti psychotics may dull you, in my opinion and experience the anti psychotics are a last resort...
like come on, it blocks all your serotonin/dopamine receptors, it may make you emotionless/etc...


sure if you really need it, then fine, but why take something so powerful that blocks you?.... really, I personally don't suggest it...
https://www.erowid.org/experiences/subs/exp_Pharms_Risperidone.shtml

look up the experiences of antipsychotics on erwoid, they don't look too good:


like at least try some other things before trying anti psychotics....
exercise, get up every morning before work/etc like at 7am and go running in the country side, nice and quite, and it will feel nice and give you a burst of energy throughout the day...

getting enough sleep? sunlight? diet? etc....


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: pineapple3]
    #22085109 - 08/13/15 07:04 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I used to, I was working, gyming and enjoying myself. I lost myself after relationship issues when I felt like I had lost my identity.

I think it would be helpful to dull myself.
My mind is overactive.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: pineapple3]
    #22085177 - 08/13/15 07:38 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I've tried 2 SSRI's, Zoloft and Fluvoxatine. They both ended up making it worse and causing me manic episodes after 2 weeks.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleSun King
 User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 02/15/14
Posts: 4,069
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22085259 - 08/13/15 08:06 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

My brother is schizophrenic. His diagnosis consisted of ruling out everything else. The tested for brain tumors and all sorts of things. His is on a handful of pills, mainly anti-psychotics and SSRIs. These manage his disease pretty well.

I don't know how they will confirm BPD.


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Sun King]
    #22087748 - 08/13/15 03:19 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

One of my uncles was schizophrenic before he killed himself, it happened before I was born but genes could play a role.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22087876 - 08/13/15 03:45 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

From what I understand, current research suggests that genetics play a very small, if any, role in the formation of conditions like BPD & Schizophrenia. Back in the 70's & 80's it was believed that it played a far greater role than current research suggests, but as you know, scientific theory changes a lot over time.

Seriously brother, I know it'll take a bit of work on your part, but if you're taking this thing seriously, read that book I suggested in post #2. If you're serious about understanding your condition, you're gonna need to work harder than just sticking a question up on an internet forum. If not the book, then a psychiatrist & therapist if you want someone else to do the work. You're not gonna find what you need here.

My wife has BPD, so I'm no stranger to this shit. Interestingly, she seems reticent about understanding her condition too. I'm not surprised, as when you look into the root cause, it's very painful stuff.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22088536 - 08/13/15 06:31 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I've been to the GP and they referred me to a psychologist. They offered me lexapro but I'm not big on SSRI's since the last 2 i tried gave me manic episodes. Zoloft/Fluvoxatine


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22088573 - 08/13/15 06:44 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

So the psychiatrist (psychologists cannot normally prescribe drugs) offered you these drugs? Did they not give you a diagnosis first?


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleSun King
 User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 02/15/14
Posts: 4,069
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22088686 - 08/13/15 07:17 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

You should get a good diagnosis, if you are really having serious problems.


--------------------


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Sun King]
    #22088735 - 08/13/15 07:29 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I'm glad to hear you turned down the Lexapro (Escitalopram) - I've seen the side effects first hand, and they're absolutely horrific.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22088799 - 08/13/15 07:44 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I talked to the GP, general practitioner, doctor and he recommended me to see a psychologist. He afterwards offered me a prescription to lexapro but I would rather talk to a psychologist and get a real attempt at a diagnosis first.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineMarkostheGnostic
Elder
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22089164 - 08/13/15 08:55 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

You cannot be accurately diagnosed this way, and I have considerable personal and clinical experience with Borderline Personality Disorder (if that is what you're trying to say). Self-loathing and frustration can result in those behaviors in people where some personality disorder is operative, or they can be an attempt to shock oneself into a condition of normalcy, much like with self-mutilation behaviors. A history-taking by a therapist in a clinical interview at the least is in order.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #22089192 - 08/13/15 09:00 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I know =) and i'm booked for Monday. I'm not expecting to have BDP but I have a history of symptoms i'd like to discuss that sound similar to having BDP.

Just trying to hear about peoples experiences. Self loathing and frustration has been common for years.
What kind of behaviors did you see in someone who had BDP?


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineMarkostheGnostic
Elder
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22090596 - 08/14/15 10:24 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I know =) and i'm booked for Monday. I'm not expecting to have BDP but I have a history of symptoms i'd like to discuss that sound similar to having BDP.

Just trying to hear about peoples experiences. Self loathing and frustration has been common for years.
What kind of behaviors did you see in someone who had BDP?




Firstly, it's BPD NOT BDP. :lol: (which is why you got tagged as dyslexic by Sun King). This is a good Wiki link that takes the burden off of me having to write the same basic material. I've had a 9th grade boy threaten suicide if a girl didn't date him when I worked in a junior high school, and a beautiful sexy young female threaten suicide if I didn't allow her to move into my residential consulting room. Aside from those unique to me, yet typical Glenn Close 'Fatal Attraction' BPD behaviors, just read this:  https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #22091747 - 08/14/15 03:42 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Wow, my honest apologies to all I didn't realise my spelling error.

I've been weird and labeled weird most of my life because of my impulsive behaviors and reading about BPD, my experiences make sense and I understand them.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisible404
error
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 14,539
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22091790 - 08/14/15 03:56 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

there aren't any complete fixes drug wise for BPD. behavioral cognitive therapy is your best option if you do indeed have it.

i have some questions for you though. are you manipulative? if so, is it in situations where you fear abandonment?

you need to get an official diagnosis from a doctor though first... then you can focus on getting treatment.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineKickleM
Wanderer
 User Gallery

Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
Last seen: 20 minutes, 16 seconds
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092022 - 08/14/15 05:02 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
Wow, my honest apologies to all I didn't realise my spelling error.

I've been weird and labeled weird most of my life because of my impulsive behaviors and reading about BPD, my experiences make sense and I understand them.




Care to share some of your experiences?


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Kickle]
    #22092097 - 08/14/15 05:23 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

The kind of experiences you would expect for someone with BPD.
I've had low self respect throughout my life, I'm overly emotional, rather impulsiveness, unstable expressions and in general I feel like i'm standing on the edge of a flat surface. Discovering an affair only made it worse.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderline_personality_disorder

In the section; International Classification of Disease.
Everything ticked except for -excessive efforts to avoid abandonment;


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Edited by sudly (08/14/15 05:28 PM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineKickleM
Wanderer
 User Gallery

Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
Last seen: 20 minutes, 16 seconds
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly] * 1
    #22092138 - 08/14/15 05:36 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Well I'll aim to be overvalued by you :thumbup:

p.s. if you do end up diagnosed I recommend asking about DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy)


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisible404
error
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 14,539
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092202 - 08/14/15 06:04 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

the symptoms you describe overlap a LOT with other disorders like ADHD, aspergers, bipolar... believe me when i say i understand where you are coming from.

a lot of it is dysfunction originating in the frontal lobe, especially the bits about impulsiveness and emotional instability.

there are medications that increase activity in this region, but again CBT has been proven effective in treating Borderline personality disorder.

edit- ^^DBT is a good treatment route as well... i haven't looked much at what it is until today, but what i understand it is a form of mindfulness about your situations and relationships and thoughts


Edited by 404 (08/14/15 06:07 PM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisible404
error
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 14,539
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22092214 - 08/14/15 06:10 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Jokeshopbeard said:
From what I understand, current research suggests that genetics play a very small, if any, role in the formation of conditions like BPD & Schizophrenia. Back in the 70's & 80's it was believed that it played a far greater role than current research suggests, but as you know, scientific theory changes a lot over time.

Seriously brother, I know it'll take a bit of work on your part, but if you're taking this thing seriously, read that book I suggested in post #2. If you're serious about understanding your condition, you're gonna need to work harder than just sticking a question up on an internet forum. If not the book, then a psychiatrist & therapist if you want someone else to do the work. You're not gonna find what you need here.

My wife has BPD, so I'm no stranger to this shit. Interestingly, she seems reticent about understanding her condition too. I'm not surprised, as when you look into the root cause, it's very painful stuff.





trauma is the largest factor for this disease along with parenting. the trauma is generally built up over the years from faulty interaction with others.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092235 - 08/14/15 06:18 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I've often felt I was different to most and was told so often. It's been detrimental to my overall health which is why I'm doing what I can to address it now. I have been to psychologists prior, I was diagnosed with an anxiety disorder but did not show symptoms of ADHD or aspergers, I have individual friends with each of the disorder and my behaviors are inconsistent with theirs.

My experiences make sense and correlate to an incredibly high degree with a diagnosis of BPD.
If they offer me another SSRI I'll most likely decline again. I believe CBT or DBT are worth trying.

That said I feel like I recognise what i'm doing a lot more right now. I often didn't feel safe, I get the idea in my mind that people are plotting against me, walking down the street I convince myself i'm being followed.
These kind of thoughts have rarely made sense to me and I haven't known my explicit reasoning for thinking so.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisible404
error
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 14,539
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092244 - 08/14/15 06:21 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

again, you should talk to your physician about these things and see what they say. ADHD and aspergers are known for their impulsiveness in social situations and their emotional dysregulation. i know less about asperger's though than i do adhd. i've had both diagnoses from two seperate doctors, but the adhd one i have had the longest. there is a lot more to adhd than you would think


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092276 - 08/14/15 06:28 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have read up on ADHD and Aspergers a fair amount too. I don't want to diagnose myself with anything but I am still in an unstable emotional state and have been for as long as I can remember.

I've been cataloging my experiences for almost 2 years now.
I have several thousand notes explaining my day to day thoughts and feelings about my experiences. The experiences I have known and felt, correlate exceedingly well with examples given in various BPD diagnosis articles.

To name one or two experiences doesn't give much of the picture but here's a few.
Uncontrollable weeping and intense emotional outbursts at random intervals throughout the day.
Intrusive disturbing thoughts I've felt little to no control over.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Edited by sudly (08/14/15 06:33 PM)


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisible404
error
 User Gallery

Registered: 08/20/10
Posts: 14,539
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092368 - 08/14/15 06:52 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

the last two i can relate a lot to. i would be driving and then go into fits of rage, then crying, then rage and cycle. out of seemingly nowhere too. i've slowed my drug use quite a bit and the symptoms have eased up. if you haven't done so already, it might be a good time to do just that. also, i have a lot of anxiety that, while it's been worse, it's still there and comes with a lot of intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors to rid myself of those thoughts - ocd pretty much.

it's really annoying. but it still sounds to me like somethings up with your serotonin pathways or something similar.


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleDividedQuantumM
Outer Head
Male User Gallery

Registered: 12/06/13
Posts: 9,819
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092376 - 08/14/15 06:55 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Good luck, sudly. :thumbup:


--------------------
Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092472 - 08/14/15 07:30 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have very strongly slowed down on my drug use. I have weed at parties every now and that and drink as often.
Shrooms were that one thing that calmed me completely, I didn't have to think as much and was in general serenity with things. So the serotonin idea has merit, I don't however want to use SSRI'.

Intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors are a pretty good starting point to think something might be off. When they've been going on for years..


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092508 - 08/14/15 07:42 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

"i have some questions for you though. are you manipulative? if so, is it in situations where you fear abandonment?"
I hate to say it bus yes.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineKickleM
Wanderer
 User Gallery

Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
Last seen: 20 minutes, 16 seconds
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092516 - 08/14/15 07:45 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Don't look now, but when the shroomery shuts down we're all going to abandon you :eek:

But I'm only kidding. I dread that day. Long live the shroomery :heart:


--------------------
Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Kickle] * 1
    #22092540 - 08/14/15 07:53 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)



Not gonna lie, almost cried.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineKickleM
Wanderer
 User Gallery

Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
Last seen: 20 minutes, 16 seconds
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092548 - 08/14/15 07:58 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

:hug:

I've mourned the loss of Icelander's presence here on many occasions.

I also wonder where the likes of:
RGV
quinn
diploid
grapefruit
white beard

and others have been :frown:


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092962 - 08/14/15 10:43 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

white beard has been knocking about, but haven't seen any of those other guys for some time.

I miss Icey too. Place doesn't feel quite the same without him.

Quote:

404 said:
again, you should talk to your physician about these things and see what they say. ADHD and aspergers are known for their impulsiveness in social situations and their emotional dysregulation. i know less about asperger's though than i do adhd. i've had both diagnoses from two seperate doctors, but the adhd one i have had the longest. there is a lot more to adhd than you would think



I have Aspergers, and I suspect my wife has BPD (as yet undiagnosed officially, although her psychiatrist has voiced his suspicions) and I tell you, these two conditions are not even remotely similar. Shit yeah I can seem impulsive, but that's only cause body language is barely readable to me and I have low empathy and generally don't care what people think of me. I can see how my characteristics could be seen as ADD/ADHD like also - there are definitely similarities, but BPD is a whole different cup of tea man!


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22093171 - 08/15/15 12:21 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

404 said:
again, you should talk to your physician about these things and see what they say. ADHD and aspergers are known for their impulsiveness in social situations and their emotional dysregulation. i know less about asperger's though than i do adhd. i've had both diagnoses from two seperate doctors, but the adhd one i have had the longest. there is a lot more to adhd than you would think




I can handle myself socially but I don't do it often because it mentally wares me out greatly.

Over the past few days I've cried for several hours already because I didn't want to believe it but i'm watching myself do it so it's hard to shrug off.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22093186 - 08/15/15 12:30 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I can handle myself socially but I don't do it often because it mentally wares me out greatly.

Over the past few days I've cried for several hours already because I didn't want to believe it but i'm watching myself do it so it's hard to shrug off.




They sound exactly like some of my wife's symptoms. Hold in there brother, that's a fucking rough ride.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22095913 - 08/15/15 06:16 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

It's a diagnosis!

I am a quiet borderline individual.

This is different to the classic borderline as I do not outwardly express my anger, I inwardly blame it and create my own sense of abandonment.

http://www.borderline-personality-disorder.com/mental-health/what-is-a-quiet-borderline/
http://wtfisbpd.tumblr.com/post/96320302121/i-was-a-quiet-borderline
https://makebpdstigmafree.wordpress.com/2013/04/18/types-of-borderline-quiet-borderlines/
http://www.aapel.org/bdp/BLborderquietUS.html

It came from my Dad.
"I do not rage or SI. I have never been able to express anger--my father simply did not allow it and I have never found a manner to let it out. I am just too tightly wound to get angry."


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,808
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22100023 - 08/16/15 07:10 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

This is a bitter pill to swallow but I have BPD. I don't recklessly act on my emotions like the classical BPD, I am a quiet borderline that simply has a black and white view on life.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflineMarkostheGnostic
Elder
Male User Gallery


Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly] * 1
    #22100193 - 08/16/15 07:53 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I recommend this little book. A psychiatric nurse gave me her copy after I divorced my ex-wife. I read it and sent it TO my ex-wife. http://www.amazon.com/Hate-You-Dont-Leave-Me/dp/0380713055/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1439774020&sr=8-2&keywords=i+hate+you+don%27t+leave+me ; You've already had a recommendation for DBT created by Marsha Linehan, so someone trained in her method might be particularly helpful if you decide on therapy. There is also this book, but it is geared to clinicians: http://www.amazon.com/Psychotherapy-Quiet-Borderline-Patient-Personality/dp/1568210604/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1439776230&sr=8-1&keywords=the+quiet+borderline


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
OfflinePurkinje
Stranger
Female


Registered: 07/08/15
Posts: 34
Loc: SW Ohio
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22101389 - 08/17/15 03:18 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have an official BPD diagnosis, if you ever want to talk, PM me. It helps knowing other people are going through similar shit. But my experiences are probably different from your own, I'm a very outwardly angry, impulsive, reckless, and self-destructive borderline.

It's not an easy pill to swallow. Because it's a personality disorder, it will most likely affect you the rest of your life. Plus, the stigma around BPD sucks, even in the mental health field, people don't like dealing with someone once they've been diagnosed with BPD.

I highly recommend reading up as much as you can on the disorder. It helps me feel a little more stable, a little less bat-shit crazy.


--------------------
"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars." Khalil Gibran


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
Jump to top Pages: 1 | 2 | 3  [ show all ]

Shop: Original Sensible Seeds Autoflowering Cannabis Seeds   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order   Bridgetown Botanicals Bridgetown Botanicals   Kraken Kratom Kratom Capsules for Sale   PhytoExtractum Buy Bali Kratom Powder


Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* The Pineal Gland, LSD and Serotonin Twirling 1,446 10 09/30/03 12:31 AM
by Ped
* Emotion/serotonin system and logical thought Comradez 2,301 12 02/05/11 05:29 PM
by Peril_eyes
* ecstatic rapture mit 1,666 4 09/05/01 12:13 PM
by BBin
* forsaken or psychotic???
( 1 2 3 all )
IBLISS 2,774 40 05/16/06 09:40 PM
by Jackenobi
* Pick the psychotic from religious and drug experiences enotake2 1,283 12 02/26/03 02:05 AM
by Grav
* Pheremone receptors homo vs hetro teknix 221 0 06/03/10 03:21 PM
by teknix
* Scrambled Neurons
( 1 2 3 all )
raytrace 6,008 50 07/18/02 04:39 AM
by Xlea321
* Why do people have such a hard time dropping pre-concieved notions based on nothing?
( 1 2 all )
Cognitive_Shift 2,828 39 03/10/09 02:54 PM
by daytripper23

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: Middleman, DividedQuantum
2,446 topic views. 0 members, 13 guests and 2 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Show Images Only | Sort by Score | Print Topic ]
Search this thread:

Copyright 1997-2024 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.044 seconds spending 0.01 seconds on 14 queries.