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InvisibleDividedQuantumM
Outer Head
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Registered: 12/06/13
Posts: 9,819
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092376 - 08/14/15 06:55 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Good luck, sudly. :thumbup:


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Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092472 - 08/14/15 07:30 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have very strongly slowed down on my drug use. I have weed at parties every now and that and drink as often.
Shrooms were that one thing that calmed me completely, I didn't have to think as much and was in general serenity with things. So the serotonin idea has merit, I don't however want to use SSRI'.

Intrusive thoughts and repetitive behaviors are a pretty good starting point to think something might be off. When they've been going on for years..


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092508 - 08/14/15 07:42 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

"i have some questions for you though. are you manipulative? if so, is it in situations where you fear abandonment?"
I hate to say it bus yes.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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OnlineKickleM
Wanderer
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Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
Last seen: 7 minutes, 21 seconds
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092516 - 08/14/15 07:45 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Don't look now, but when the shroomery shuts down we're all going to abandon you :eek:

But I'm only kidding. I dread that day. Long live the shroomery :heart:


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Why shouldn't the truth be stranger than fiction?
Fiction, after all, has to make sense. -- Mark Twain


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Kickle] * 1
    #22092540 - 08/14/15 07:53 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)



Not gonna lie, almost cried.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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OnlineKickleM
Wanderer
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Registered: 12/16/06
Posts: 17,856
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Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22092548 - 08/14/15 07:58 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

:hug:

I've mourned the loss of Icelander's presence here on many occasions.

I also wonder where the likes of:
RGV
quinn
diploid
grapefruit
white beard

and others have been :frown:


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InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22092962 - 08/14/15 10:43 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

white beard has been knocking about, but haven't seen any of those other guys for some time.

I miss Icey too. Place doesn't feel quite the same without him.

Quote:

404 said:
again, you should talk to your physician about these things and see what they say. ADHD and aspergers are known for their impulsiveness in social situations and their emotional dysregulation. i know less about asperger's though than i do adhd. i've had both diagnoses from two seperate doctors, but the adhd one i have had the longest. there is a lot more to adhd than you would think



I have Aspergers, and I suspect my wife has BPD (as yet undiagnosed officially, although her psychiatrist has voiced his suspicions) and I tell you, these two conditions are not even remotely similar. Shit yeah I can seem impulsive, but that's only cause body language is barely readable to me and I have low empathy and generally don't care what people think of me. I can see how my characteristics could be seen as ADD/ADHD like also - there are definitely similarities, but BPD is a whole different cup of tea man!


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Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: 404]
    #22093171 - 08/15/15 12:21 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

404 said:
again, you should talk to your physician about these things and see what they say. ADHD and aspergers are known for their impulsiveness in social situations and their emotional dysregulation. i know less about asperger's though than i do adhd. i've had both diagnoses from two seperate doctors, but the adhd one i have had the longest. there is a lot more to adhd than you would think




I can handle myself socially but I don't do it often because it mentally wares me out greatly.

Over the past few days I've cried for several hours already because I didn't want to believe it but i'm watching myself do it so it's hard to shrug off.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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InvisibleJokeshopbeard
Humble Student

Registered: 11/30/11
Posts: 26,088
Loc: Deep in the system Flag
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22093186 - 08/15/15 12:30 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sudly said:
I can handle myself socially but I don't do it often because it mentally wares me out greatly.

Over the past few days I've cried for several hours already because I didn't want to believe it but i'm watching myself do it so it's hard to shrug off.




They sound exactly like some of my wife's symptoms. Hold in there brother, that's a fucking rough ride.


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #22095913 - 08/15/15 06:16 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

It's a diagnosis!

I am a quiet borderline individual.

This is different to the classic borderline as I do not outwardly express my anger, I inwardly blame it and create my own sense of abandonment.

http://www.borderline-personality-disorder.com/mental-health/what-is-a-quiet-borderline/
http://wtfisbpd.tumblr.com/post/96320302121/i-was-a-quiet-borderline
https://makebpdstigmafree.wordpress.com/2013/04/18/types-of-borderline-quiet-borderlines/
http://www.aapel.org/bdp/BLborderquietUS.html

It came from my Dad.
"I do not rage or SI. I have never been able to express anger--my father simply did not allow it and I have never found a manner to let it out. I am just too tightly wound to get angry."


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger


Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22100023 - 08/16/15 07:10 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

This is a bitter pill to swallow but I have BPD. I don't recklessly act on my emotions like the classical BPD, I am a quiet borderline that simply has a black and white view on life.


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I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
Elder
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Registered: 12/09/99
Posts: 14,279
Loc: South Florida Flag
Last seen: 3 years, 2 days
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly] * 1
    #22100193 - 08/16/15 07:53 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I recommend this little book. A psychiatric nurse gave me her copy after I divorced my ex-wife. I read it and sent it TO my ex-wife. http://www.amazon.com/Hate-You-Dont-Leave-Me/dp/0380713055/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1439774020&sr=8-2&keywords=i+hate+you+don%27t+leave+me ; You've already had a recommendation for DBT created by Marsha Linehan, so someone trained in her method might be particularly helpful if you decide on therapy. There is also this book, but it is geared to clinicians: http://www.amazon.com/Psychotherapy-Quiet-Borderline-Patient-Personality/dp/1568210604/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1439776230&sr=8-1&keywords=the+quiet+borderline


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflinePurkinje
Stranger
Female


Registered: 07/08/15
Posts: 34
Loc: SW Ohio
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
Re: I think I have BDP [Re: sudly]
    #22101389 - 08/17/15 03:18 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

I have an official BPD diagnosis, if you ever want to talk, PM me. It helps knowing other people are going through similar shit. But my experiences are probably different from your own, I'm a very outwardly angry, impulsive, reckless, and self-destructive borderline.

It's not an easy pill to swallow. Because it's a personality disorder, it will most likely affect you the rest of your life. Plus, the stigma around BPD sucks, even in the mental health field, people don't like dealing with someone once they've been diagnosed with BPD.

I highly recommend reading up as much as you can on the disorder. It helps me feel a little more stable, a little less bat-shit crazy.


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"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars." Khalil Gibran


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