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OfflinePoopyGonzales
Illuminati Recruitment Officer
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Registered: 02/26/11
Posts: 602
Loc: Wollongong, NSW Flag
Last seen: 6 years, 6 months
relationship advice (fuck social media) * 1
    #22055958 - 08/06/15 10:37 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Hey there.

So to put it simply, My girlfriend of two years has recently started ignoring the shit out of me/constantly on her phone...

Always talking to people from overseas, staying up late and not coming to bed, sleeping all day, and just not listening to me when we speak...

Now first up I'll admit it, yeah I'm a little jealous, and yeah I've told her how it makes me feel. But nothing ever changes about it.

The thing that hurts me most is her tumblr, she hasn't put up the fact that we are in relationship on there. And constantly has people asking dirty shit.... But doesn't want me to look at her tumblr, says it's her private space where she can post whatever she wants without being judged... But yet talks to all these people from overseas and never mentions me.

Is this weird to anyone else?
Any have any advice?
Or am I just being a twat?


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OfflineYukon Cornelius
Bumble Wrangler
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Registered: 09/01/13
Posts: 1,348
Loc: Peppermint Mines
Last seen: 4 hours, 18 minutes
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales] * 2
    #22056009 - 08/06/15 10:52 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Honestly your girlfriend sounds incredibly immature. "Private space" and social media are mutually exclusive terms, it seems that what she really means is a place where she can post whatever she wants that you might not like with out you being able to criticize her for it.

I had a friend who's ex created a private Twitter account just to vent about occasional stupid shit in their relationship with people that would always take her side.

She can have her own life, but if she intentionally tries to exclude you from these things it is probably for a reason.

Try talking to her directly about it. I know that isn't something you haven't tried before but communicating will bring you closer to solving the issue one way or another.


--------------------
"I didn't know chicken's wore suspenders" - Towelie



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OfflinePoopyGonzales
Illuminati Recruitment Officer
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Registered: 02/26/11
Posts: 602
Loc: Wollongong, NSW Flag
Last seen: 6 years, 6 months
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: Yukon Cornelius]
    #22056038 - 08/06/15 11:02 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Yeah I have tried talking to her, even though it feels like a dog chasing it's own tail...

And yes that's exactly what it seems like, a place where she can post things that would otherwise upset me, where I can't see it... Which is fine, she needs that, everyone does, but a public blog? Not the best place imo.

I mean I'm doing wrong by invading her "private space". But what she posts there really hurts....

Posting things like "I'm so sick of being alone" or "bored as and really tired someone message me"... And just recently she's exchanged phone numbers with somone from USA...

Recently it's fucked up her sleeping pattern, she's up till 3am almost every night and asleep till lunch time every day. And when she is awake and around me I'm always coming in second to her tumblr blog...


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales] * 2
    #22056905 - 08/07/15 07:30 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Sounds like there isn't mutual respect within your relationship. She probably takes you for granted.

If she's ignoring you, giving her space is the best thing to do. Either she'll realise you're getting distant or she'll show her true self and push you away.

It's probably best you disconnect yourself from her for a while and take some space to re evaluate what you want from each other because the fact that you've written this is a sign that your happiness isn't what you want it to be in your relationship.

As for her tumbler, tell her if you are offended and see how she reacts. If she doesn't give a shit then she's obviously taking you for granted and doesn't respect you.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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OfflineMagenta
I care!!
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Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 20,322
Loc: The land of plenty Flag
Last seen: 2 months, 6 days
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales] * 2
    #22056914 - 08/07/15 07:36 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Dump that bitch, man. You two are already dead and you're not doing anyone any favors by allowing it to live. If you do it right, you may be able to salvage a 'friends with benefits deal' until one of you finds a new monogamous partner.


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: Magenta]
    #22056925 - 08/07/15 07:40 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

No, you should talk to her, open communications and try to understand why it is that you two seem to be growing apart. If one of you isn't happy in the relationship then something is wrong and it should be discussed.

Express how you feel, ask her to express how she feels. If she is incapable of doing so then you need to ask yourself how good your relationship really is. 

That said it should only end if she shows herself to have different feeling towards the relationship than you do.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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InvisibleMr.GuessWork
Stranger
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Registered: 03/30/13
Posts: 4,563
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: sudly]
    #22056938 - 08/07/15 07:46 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

^that mostly. I'd also end it if you don't think she will make any progress towards meeting your expectations (assuming they're in sync with hers). There's no sense in staying in a dysfunctional relationship that makes you feel bad at this point.

EDIT: I forgot to add that jealousy won't help. Get over that and work on the productive stuff.


Edited by Mr.GuessWork (08/07/15 07:47 AM)


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OfflineMagenta
I care!!
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Registered: 06/14/09
Posts: 20,322
Loc: The land of plenty Flag
Last seen: 2 months, 6 days
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: sudly] * 1
    #22056968 - 08/07/15 08:00 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

The woman won't tell op what's wrong because more than often the woman doesn't know what's wrong. OP, should dump her, and start new again. He should learn how to be more directive and use that skill in his next relationship. If it's true love :rolleyes: then the two will get back together in the end. Nothing lost, but a new skill gained.


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Invisibledionysiandame
Mischievous Maenad
Female

Registered: 08/27/13
Posts: 324
Loc: Samothrace
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: Magenta]
    #22058085 - 08/07/15 11:26 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

"The thing that hurts me most is her tumblr, she hasn't put up the fact that we are in relationship on there. And constantly has people asking dirty shit.... But doesn't want me to look at her tumblr, says it's her private space where she can post whatever she wants without being judged... But yet talks to all these people from overseas and never mentions me."

Sounds like she's exhibiting escapist behavior as well as a potential emotional adultery (since you haven't hinted at her fooling around with anyone.) There may be needs she feels aren't being met by the relationship and, rather than talk to you about them, she's going into her own little world where the lackluster life she's leading doesn't exist.

To be fair, there is very little you can do about this if she doesn't really talk to you about how she's feeling/perceiving the relationship.

So as others have said, open communication and get a sense of where she stands and whether or not to continue. No one should stay in a relationship just because it's "comfortable" but unfailing. At this point, you're not even comfortable...


--------------------
He (Dionysos) keeps me with all of his other pretty things for I am just another pretty thing in a long list of acquisitions. :psychsplit:
Yes! And their brains are releasing adrenaline, dopamine, even dimethyltryptamine from the pineal gland! This has serious educational value! Thanatophobia and this N.D.E. is giving us euphoric altered awareness! Don't you see, Princess? We were all born to die! – Finn the Human
Pay me what you owe me. Don't act like you forgot. BBHMM.


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Invisiblesudly
Darwin's stagger

Registered: 01/05/15
Posts: 10,805
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: dionysiandame]
    #22059441 - 08/07/15 04:23 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

There may be needs she feels aren't being met by the relationship and, rather than talk to you about them, she's going into her own little world where the lackluster life she's leading doesn't exist."
^ that

Like many women she may have become content with you as you are no longer a challenge for her.
Ask her if you're a challenge. When a woman doesn't have to try, often she won't and she'll get bored.


--------------------
I am whatever Darwin needs me to be.



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InvisibleBoomerMan420
Stranger
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Registered: 10/24/07
Posts: 1,641
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: sudly]
    #22059471 - 08/07/15 04:32 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Yes Fuck The Media So many of you are straight warped from the Tell-a-vision of distortion damn shame I Love you all I guess I'll see ya when you get there


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Offlinezappaisgod
horrid asshole


Registered: 02/11/04
Posts: 81,741
Loc: Fractallife's gym
Last seen: 7 years, 7 months
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales] * 3
    #22059508 - 08/07/15 04:43 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

You don't have a girlfriend


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OfflineShining Cosmos
Space Nomad
Male

Registered: 06/18/13
Posts: 1,808
Loc: PHX
Last seen: 5 years, 3 months
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: zappaisgod]
    #22059845 - 08/07/15 05:56 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Dump her. There's no respect there.


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Offlinesun_spots
Good boob day
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Registered: 02/27/10
Posts: 14,306
Loc: Nirvana
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales] * 2
    #22059878 - 08/07/15 06:01 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

zappaisgod said:
You don't have a girlfriend




--------------------
ShiVersblood said:
shut ur fucking mouth. before a penis is are be enters

LordSenate said:
Cheese poop... Who gives a fuck gotta eat lots of cheese.


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Anonymous #1

Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: Shining Cosmos]
    #22059893 - 08/07/15 06:05 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

i cant be the only one thinking shes selling her body online and gettin high.
xplains everything


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Anonymous #2

Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: sun_spots] * 1
    #22059921 - 08/07/15 06:13 PM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

sun_spots said:
Quote:

zappaisgod said:
You don't have a girlfriend







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OfflineFungusOfTheBungus


Registered: 02/05/15
Posts: 121
Last seen: 7 years, 8 months
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: PoopyGonzales]
    #22061191 - 08/08/15 12:10 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

PoopyGonzales said:
Hey there.

So to put it simply, My girlfriend of two years has recently started ignoring the shit out of me/constantly on her phone...

Always talking to people from overseas, staying up late and not coming to bed, sleeping all day, and just not listening to me when we speak...

Now first up I'll admit it, yeah I'm a little jealous, and yeah I've told her how it makes me feel. But nothing ever changes about it.

The thing that hurts me most is her tumblr, she hasn't put up the fact that we are in relationship on there. And constantly has people asking dirty shit.... But doesn't want me to look at her tumblr, says it's her private space where she can post whatever she wants without being judged... But yet talks to all these people from overseas and never mentions me.

Is this weird to anyone else?
Any have any advice?
Or am I just being a twat?




Is it weird? No. This is typical behavior from an immature female. In her eyes, her needs always come before yours. She's cheating on you. If not physically then emotionally.
Advice? Listen to your gut instincts. Trust them and not your brain.
Being a twat? No, you're not. You are a person with feelings. And she is purposely hurting your feelings. That is emotional abuse.


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InvisibleMalcolm_Xtasy
Oh baby what Is you doin??
Trans-male User Gallery


Registered: 04/04/12
Posts: 13,851
Loc: Flag
Re: relationship advice (fuck social media) [Re: zappaisgod]
    #22061293 - 08/08/15 01:01 AM (8 years, 5 months ago)

Bitch sounds lame as fuck. Get a real woman that isn't constantly on social media and all that bullshit.

also,

Quote:

zappaisgod said:
You don't have a girlfriend




--------------------
I'm stupid, Enlil is smart.
I'm ugly, Enlil is beautiful.
I'm a loser, Enlil is a winner.
Someday, I hope to be like Enlil but secretly know I never will.


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