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Offlinebuest
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Registered: 11/17/12
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Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window
    #22009240 - 07/28/15 12:07 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I felt the need to vent a little bit, cause I don't currently have anywhere else to do it.

For those of you that know me, im a experienced tripper and all around drug user. I love people and I love life a lot.

Recently I've stumbled into a few of the most mind boggling, mind bending trips i've ever experienced, that I not only wish I didn't have to experience, but hope nobody else ever has to go through.

This last trip brought me to a place where language was no longer something that helped me or anyone else, it was only a hinderance because the only thing that made sense was the angle and shape and color of the object or experience.

im probably not making any sense, cause thats all i see when i try to replay the experience, just a bunch of nonsense being smushed together. the thing that stood out to me the most during this whole thing, was this data archtype, a small piece of information that i could take and apply to EVERYTHING else and it would just make perfect sense. even now im begging for it to go away, because i know i wont be able to sleep until it does. . . go away.

In any case, you should have seen my delight when i first stumbled upon this idea, it just fit so nicely. . . too nicely, irrilly nice, menacingly nice. it put into question everything ive ever known or thought in such a simple way, that i could no longer be right about anything ever again.

i realize none of this really matters and it probably sounds like a bunch of nonsense garbage to a bunch of people probably as worn out as me. oh well, i just wish i could share the idea without having to put anyone through what i went through to understand it. In any case, talk about a bad trip, last night,

i imagined creepy crawlies all over my room, i could hear them making their noises, i could hear my insides churning from my closet behind me, eminating from a childhood toy, i could see my muscles shifting in the garbage bag next to my door, i found comfort in the lack of comfort there is, just dumb jokes and whatever with my old friend cosmic. . . and this fucking idea like a blanket over everything else is just haunting the shit out of me,

i cant wait until its gone. . . I know i'm just dellusional as fuck, and anyone who knows me knows i have schitzophrenia, but the fact of the matter is, this idea wouldnt be so fucking simple if it werent true, as much as i wish i could share it i doubt i have the ability to do so, that coupled with the fact that it would drive anyone completely insane. . .

i donno, i need to lay down and rest, but i cant help but plug this stupid fucking idea into everything i already know, over and over again just to make sure it works :-\ somebody please make me feel stupid.


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Offlinenicechrisman
Interdimensional space wizard
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009254 - 07/28/15 12:10 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Hi Buest. That sounds weird. How's Vegas?


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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Offlinebuest
That
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009266 - 07/28/15 12:12 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

like, imagine everything you've ever known, and then you zoom out, and it's shown from a different angle, and at this angle you can find a piece of something that goes along with every other piece that youve never noticed before, and its the same for every piece even though you only have a few samples. yes, i guess, thats kindda what im getting at. oh well, fuck it, im going to bed

sup nicechris, vegas sucks balls, im coming back to cali in less than a month, lol, hope to see you around


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OfflineReposadoXochipilli
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: nicechrisman] * 1
    #22009272 - 07/28/15 12:13 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

sometimes you have to remember it is just drugs in your brain and on occasion they form some disturbing thoughts and feelings, it will go away.


--------------------


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Offlinebuest
That
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009281 - 07/28/15 12:14 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

oh yeah, i had to delete my facebook a while back, ill have to make a new one that isent a joke, hahaha, but i guess facebook is a joke no matter how you look at it :laugh:


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Offlinenicechrisman
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009285 - 07/28/15 12:14 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

yeah we'll have to kick it for sure.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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Offlinebuest
That
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: ReposadoXochipilli]
    #22009297 - 07/28/15 12:16 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

ReposadoXochipilli said:
sometimes you have to remember it is just drugs in your brain and on occasion they form some disturbing thoughts and feelings, it will go away.




i understand where you're coming from, and i appriciate the thought, but this is way beyond disturbing, i donno, i should just accept that its all nonsense


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Offlinebuest
That
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009315 - 07/28/15 12:18 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

if there was a way to record experience, this one would go in the dumpster real quick, hahaha, ok, gnite/gmorning frands


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OfflineEnemaOfState
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: buest]
    #22009324 - 07/28/15 12:21 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Don't try to "chase the white rabbit".
Some trips are just uninterpretable and it just hurts your brain to try.

Sometimes yah just have to say "well that was a weird fucking trip" and carry on.


--------------------
A Pretty Big Grizmatik Undergroundzies Conspiracy

Too weird to live.
Too rare to die.



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OfflineTheGreenArrow
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Registered: 06/22/12
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Re: Clinging to any sort of "normal" existance just went out the window [Re: EnemaOfState]
    #22009649 - 07/28/15 01:16 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I'm pretty sure Lao Tzu tried to describe this feeling. :strokebeard:


--------------------
A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an
invasion, butcher a hog, design a building, conn a ship, write a
sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the
dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve an
equation, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a
computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly.
Specialization is for insects.- Robert A. Heinlein
Saint RedBow of the Shroomey Loomey-Patron Saint of Sandbaggin Sumbitchs


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