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shroomin bliss

Registered: 08/22/03
Posts: 876
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up?
    #2194957 - 12/22/03 03:32 AM (14 years, 6 months ago)

Hey...I wrote this note to a girlfriend of mine (not romantic-just friends for years). I was engaged to her roomate who I lived with for 1 and a half years and passed away last March. Our friendship has kinda grown stronger but we also have drifted a little mostly because of me cutting off the world while I continue to whither in depression. Our friendship is really strong but I wrote this note on her front porch fucked up and was gonna drop it off with some gifts but decided to sober up before I gave it. I actually had (and still have) this melody-beat in my head that the poem kind of goes in sync with but it will be kinda hard to find that rythm. Im just gonna copy what I wrote down on the letter to this post so tell me what you think....

Hey hun It’s me Erik, just wanted to stop by..say hi and leave a butterfly kiss from a boy I hope your still friends with. We haven’t hung out in such a long time its getting hard to remember the stuff that you like…atleast I know candles will do for now but maybe sometime we can get together to just gaze at the clouds and exchange thoughts and hugs and smiles and the way we feel now that reality has flipped us around and the fact that karma decided to skip town for a while.
Remember that disco party we had that one time, when everything was nice and that light was still bright on that part of my mind that’s tellin’ me everything’s flawlessly fine? Don’t you always wish you could go back to the past and reminisce on that feeling of your very first kiss or the last one you held from what you know as love? I wish that kiss with Shanny lasted forever but now I just stare at that picture for hours and wish I realized the beauty of that musical sound that twirls in my head of how much I had then with how little I have now….
If you happen to see Micky or Karey, be sure to blow them an extra kiss for me…most likely they wont turn there head unless we meet in a dream or catch eyes passin’ by in a fantasy I call Heaven---the sixth dimension or most likely somewhere in between. I wonder if you are deciding to stay or wanting to completely just fade away and close another door in my past cause history proves that friends don’t stick around anymore and after you’re adorned in some love and some pain, the faces begin to fade like teardrops in rain. I come home from school everyday, try to write music, then drift away into space and then contemplate whether my life is in vain and I’m drained from the pain that puts my mind on this roller coaster…. of whether or not I should try to pass out or simply take a bath with a toaster.. and after I go through my oblivious trip I find myself on the tip of a room full of abyssaly “nothing”….its almost like we are thrown in this world then all of a sudden supposed to accomplish something. Oh shit…look what I did, this is what happens when death, love and drugs are exposed to a kid that has rhymes and good times and philosophy floating around in his mind. Im kinda wondering down this shadowy track so Sorry for passin your birthday and Christmas or anything else Im probably missin and hopefully these gifts will pick up some of that slack… I got this card just for you Jax, I thought you’d like the design on the front but it looks like I already filled it up with my junk so sorry for making you read this far and even if you don’t decide to call, or say hi or goodbye or think of me ever again, I will always consider you a very dear friend.

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Registered: 12/20/03
Posts: 201
Loc: superfailure
Last seen: 14 years, 3 months
Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: orizon]
    #2195118 - 12/22/03 06:35 AM (14 years, 6 months ago)

thats beautiful man

but why would you want to tear it up? poetry that comes straight from the heart like that is the hardest to write, in my opinion. if you can write that good to express yourself, i consider you a lucky person

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Registered: 12/30/02
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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: skoomaguitarist]
    #2195154 - 12/22/03 07:38 AM (14 years, 6 months ago)

I look back and reminisce,
and ask myself how things ended up like this

Fold for The Shroomery!

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Registered: 08/17/00
Posts: 1,816
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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: orizon]
    #2197180 - 12/23/03 05:32 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

That was really good
give it to her.

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Why not?
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Registered: 10/11/03
Posts: 16,392
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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: shaggy101]
    #2198811 - 12/24/03 01:10 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

i agree with the above posts


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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: orizon]
    #2198930 - 12/24/03 02:34 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

She will like it. You're giving yourself away though. Are you romantically inclined to her? Truthfully now. Nothing wrong with that but if she gets a strong vibe from you like this it might tell her that you are. That's great if she has mutual feelings but if she doesn't be ready for that.
If it's just a friendship thing that's really sweet.
If you have romantic inclinations, well, I hate to tell ya but my advice would be to not do it. I could be wrong though.

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Registered: 06/10/03
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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: frogsheath]
    #2199308 - 12/24/03 08:51 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Awesome. What were you on? I like it a lot, and I think you should give it to her. Tearing that up would be an abomination.

P.S. I can really relate to a lot of what you say in this, and I know of these futility feelings, and all I can say is: In the long run, all the bad things that are happening will pay off. Stick with it.

P.P.S. If you DO have a romantic inclination towards her, keep in mind that by randomly re-entering her life, you're very possibly randomly re-entering her life while she's already involved with someone. So give it to her as a friend, and expect only friendship in return. If you end up with more from her someday, then consider yourself blessed.

Edited by JacquesCousteau (12/24/03 08:56 AM)

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shroomin bliss

Registered: 08/22/03
Posts: 876
Last seen: 13 years, 3 months
Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: JacquesCousteau]
    #2200371 - 12/25/03 01:53 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

Actually....I am not at all romatically inclined to her. But she has persueing me ever since we met. She is really cute and I always told her that I didnt want to sacrafice our friendship because it is too much to risk...and breakin up always tends to destoy friendships. She has been there through the touph times and we are really good friends and I actually kinda feel bad that I have been blockin her off (as well as the rest of the world) from my life. She comes by my house and jots little notes while im sleeping and leaves continuous messages on my machine that I just delete with the rest of them. I like her alot but I dont want to give her the impression that I want to go steady or anything. I just wanted to acknowlegde that I apprecite her support and friendship. I think I had a 15mg hydrocodone buzz goin there..maybe a little valium too. Well, Im glad you guys liked it, I have tons of poetry like this. Do you like my style or the lyrics? Thanks again guys

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Registered: 03/18/03
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Re: Letter-peom wrote while fuked up...tear up? [Re: orizon]
    #2200389 - 12/25/03 02:11 AM (14 years, 5 months ago)

man that thing flows. The rhythm reminnds me of George Jung's little speech to the lady judge in blow. I like it

namaste said:
no flamz in da ODD, if you got nothing to contribute then keep yo lips zipped

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