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OfflineSantana2015
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Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip
    #21920326 - 07/09/15 02:58 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Hey new here just thought Id get a clue as of what I'm going through.
I've always wanted to do shrooms to "get high and see things" but now I know that's not what there intended for. There more spiritual and more of a reward. Anyways, Only done shrooms twice. The first time I ever did shrooms I did an eighth (which I know now wasn't a right thing to do at all) but the trip wasn't bad it was actually a good trip but my thoughts were going one to the next to the other. Overall I felt exhausted and my brain felt fried or tired is a better way to put it.

I didn't feel normal after my first trip which was weird cause it ended great. I tried them again the week after which I will for ever regret. I didn't feel good and wasn't in the right mind set. My and a friend split an 1/8 this time and my goal was to go in the trip and fix how I was feeling. We went to the beach ,  45 minutes after I took them I started getting a wierd feeling, I was expecting the same feeling as the first trip I had but this was just an uncomfortable feeling. I then started to think about my life how it has gone down hill after all my drug use the past year. (I had done extacsy a few times and was a pot smoker for the past 2 years smoking everyday.) I asked myself if I conutined doing this were would it leave me. So I wanted to just be sober from there on out. I wanted to quit all drugs and never do them again for a lone time.  I wanted to get my life back on track.
As the time went by the wierd feeling and uncomfortable feeling still stayed and for the next hours I just kept on getting negatives thoughts in my head that I couldn't control.

My friends trip was the total opposite he was feeling all jolly and what not. After the beach we both decided to go home. As I stayed in my living room I couldn't get these negative thought out of my head , I just wanted the trip to end. I showered  hoping it would help but no luck. I then told my friend how I was feeling. And went for a walk and that took my mind off things for a bit until I panic and thought that this trip wasn't going to end. I thought I was going to be a crazy insane person in the streets walking talking to himself ignoring everyone else. I thought I wasn't going to return to reality. I keep on saying hopefully tomorrow I feel better. As I got home we sat on my front porch and I laid down and started to sweat like crazy. And like that the trip was over and I was so happy like if I had been giving another chance to live life the way I wanted to live it now. That night I felt such a positive energy rush through my veins I wanted to enjoy my life from there on out and do whatever made me happy and that I loved doing.
A couple days later I sorta jumped in the thought loop of thinking if I would ever be the same person again after what I'd been through. Kept on thinking if I would be the same as in my personality the way I talked and understood people. It got so in my head I felt like I had forgot how to make people laugh or what was funny or how to keep or start a conversation going. Kept obsessing over it for 1-2 months and juts told myself to let myself recover.
It's been almost 4 months since I had a bad trip and I still have that worry and fear. Fear I won't be able to talk to people or spark up a conversation and keep it going. Worry I wont have the same personality traits I use to have. I feel like my emotions are numb.

At first I thought I had lost my ego and  gone through ego death but I never really saw myself or felt like I was dying. I knew where I was and who I was and what time it was. So not sure if it's something that has to do with my ego or not. I just want all this fear and worry and feeling to just go away. I want to make the most out of my life and do the things that make me happy and people around me happy. I've always been a very funny person and worry if I'll still be funny. but I still make people laugh here and there. I know who I was and how I was I just can't act the way I did. I don't feel like myself fully. I feel like I was different before and now after this I feel like I'm not the same. But how can I be different if I still like the same things and still want the same things. The only difference I truly see is my not wanting to do drugs again and focus on bettering my life the way I want it to be.

I don't know if it's all in my head or something I'm going through like pstd or depression or anxiety. Just felt like I needed to reach out and have some one who's been through this or knows what's going on. Sorry if the post is to long. I just want to be the same person I was if not better but still hve all my personality traits like my sense of humor.  I just worry and fear I can't or won't talk like the way I use to talk to people. Sounds a bit wierd .

Thank you for reading my post if your still there


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OfflineSagescruffy
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21920363 - 07/09/15 03:06 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I bet you eat garbage food and live a stagnant life style.


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Offlinecube talk
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21920394 - 07/09/15 03:12 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Man I've never seen a trip affect someone like this, this is the danger however if you take a large enough dose as a novice.. got lucky the first time, second time it bit you

my opinion is go with a low dose 1.5 grams, maybe 2 grams and be in the happiest place/setting you can think of.

Music changed everything for me in terms of tripping. They can turn bad trips good in a heartbeat. I remember I was stuck in a rut of something like 10 straight bad trips, idk what the deal was but I knew this wasn't how shroom trips were supposed to be.

I listened to this one day out back and just like that, it all changed forever.



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InvisibleThayendanegea
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: cube talk]
    #21920534 - 07/09/15 03:37 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

They split an eight so I don't think the dose was too high. Psychedelics aren't for everyone, op...my guess is that you'll be fine and jump back in the psych waters again in the near future.

I know that it's stressed over and over here but "Set and Setting" are very important...more even than the dosage sometimes. I always make sure that I'm well rested before dosing and will call it off if my mind isn't in a good place to start. These enthogens can rape you and will ...if not given the respect they deserve.:sunny::peace:


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Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein


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OfflineShroomyBudz
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Thayendanegea]
    #21920550 - 07/09/15 03:40 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Everything will be okay, give yourself time to heal. Much love.

:peace: :heart:


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OfflineGoldenEye
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: ShroomyBudz]
    #21920572 - 07/09/15 03:44 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

So did you end up quiting the weed?


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OfflineAldebaran
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21920610 - 07/09/15 03:52 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I think you have some minor anxiety issues after your trip, that's all. The effects from a trip don't last, I've gone completely insane during lots of trips (thought I was dead, thought I was God e.t.c) and it all dies down and goes back to normal at the end of the trip. It's just a trip...they mess with your mind for a few hours, after that it's you messing with your own mind by worrying about not being back to normal.

If you've suddenly quit smoking weed (?) after 2 years of daily use, that might also make you feel a bit different.

All the feelings you mention from your trip are pretty normal (feeling weird and uncomfortable, thinking about your life, negative thoughts about your drug use and things in general, panic that the trip won't end or will become permanent). Trips can be like that.

I would just try and stop worrying about the trip, it's nothing to do with "ego death" or anything like that, sounds more like a bit of post-trip anxiety. You have a difficult or upsetting experience... you think about it a lot and feel anxious, that's nothing unusual. Worrying that the effects are permanent just feeds the anxiety.

I'd forget the drugs, forget the trip and concentrate on your life. If you still feel anxious in a couple of months (i.e six months after your trip) and it's stopping you doing things you normally would, then maybe think about speaking to a doctor.....but if you are getting on with your life and stop obsessing, I think this will most likely fade away when you stop worrying about it.

:nyan:


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I wrote that, but I meant something else


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OfflineKingcannon
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21921075 - 07/09/15 05:46 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I think people are like Mr. Potato head from Toy Story, some but not many have all the pieces in the right place right order, most people don't. Taking shrooms throws all these pieces off and you have the chance to put them back in the right order. Unfortunately you've become accustomed to them being in the wrong places and it feels unfamiliar, shrooms have the ability to remake a stronger more resilient and truer YOU.  Psychedelics inherently steer you to a truer self like water flows to the centre of a funnel. That's my psychoanalysis of it anyway.


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OfflineCognitive_Entropy
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Kingcannon]
    #21921282 - 07/09/15 06:42 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

A lot of this sounds like what I went through during my first trip. I immediately felt a lot of guilt for a lot of things in my life and spent the next few weeks thinking way too much and having an internal struggle about it. I say just remember that it was just a trip and the feelings will eventually go away. Just make a decision now on how you want to live your life, but don't let yourself have an internal struggle if you change on your mind on whatever later. Don't feel like you now "have" to live your life a certain way. Nothing much has changed- you just had a trip, that's all.

As for the weed thing making you feel guilty during the trip- that could be a number of things. It could be that smoking weed a lot has led to negative consequences in your life, or it could also just be the fact you have defied a society and government that says "drugs are bad". You feel bad because you have been taught to feel bad about taking drugs. Psychedelics can bring on guilt- but that doesn't always mean it is completely justified. Some of it can be from a deep-seated programming that something you do is "wrong". If you have any conflicting parts of your beliefs and persona, psychedelics can reveal them and cause you to experience guilt.

If you take shrooms just to get fucked up (not saying that's bad) or the experience is overly intense -- it could potentially induce a feeling of guilt about all drugs that you take. Next time , remember to take them in the right mindset and in the right set and setting.


Edited by Cognitive_Entropy (07/09/15 06:50 PM)


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Offlineunfortunategent
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Cognitive_Entropy]
    #21921577 - 07/09/15 07:49 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Op I believe you've just progressed in mindset and overall vision of life...something that would  have happened naturally over time, but shrooms gave to you in one sitting.  Now you've got to adjust to where things stand.  You've learned more about yourself and things will never be the same again because you can't forget what you KNOW.  Stop romanticizing your past self and live in the NOW.  You're a new person every second.


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OfflineDeviate
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: unfortunategent]
    #21921945 - 07/09/15 09:02 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

unfortunategent said:
Op I believe you've just progressed in mindset and overall vision of life...something that would  have happened naturally over time, but shrooms gave to you in one sitting.  Now you've got to adjust to where things stand.  You've learned more about yourself and things will never be the same again because you can't forget what you KNOW.  Stop romanticizing your past self and live in the NOW.  You're a new person every second.





Took the words right out of my mouth.

OP, I extend my compassion to you. I understand the sort of thing you are dealing with and it can seem very difficult from where you are right now, but you must have faith that there is a lot of light and laughter and goodness yet to come for you.

You took mushrooms not understanding their power. They are a brain change drug. The whole point of them is not to come back to the same person as you were when you set out on the trip, but rather to heal, to grow, to learn and to become something better, something truer, something far wiser and more powerful than you were before.

Because you did not know this, you reacted to it in a negative way and tried to cling to the old version of yourself which the shrooms tried to get you to let go of. That is the basic cause of your suffering and confusion in my opinion.

If it makes you feel any better, I actually go through the same thing every time I take a high dose of mushrooms. I take them for accelerated growth and healing but there is also a part of myself that resists that, and always just wants to go back to being my old self no matter how constraining or limiting that old self may have been. But the difference between me and you is that I understand this process and I remind myself that I took the mushrooms precisely because I was not satisfied with my old self and wanted to change and improve and become something new.

The truth is, we are new every moment but part of being a human is not seeing that clearly and so it can seem like a huge challenge to go through a lot of psychological and spiritual change in a short period.

My advice to you if you want to get through this and move on, is to try to let go of your past and your old self and recognize that life is constantly new. There isn't anything that doesn't change over time, mushrooms simply increased the rate of change so that it became faster than you were comfortable with. All you really need to do is become comfortable again.

Try this exercise. Focus your attention on this present moment. Ignore all thoghts and feelings, don't cling to the past or enterntain any ideas about anything. Dont push them away but if they come, dont feed them more energy, just allow them to be there while you keep focusing on how you feel right now. THen bring your attention to your breathing.

Now ask yourself, "am I ok in this moment?" "am I dying? Am I losing it? Am I falling apart?" If you do this a few times, you might start to acquaint yourself with the strange possibility that you might actually be ok and its only your thoughts that you are not ok that you keep feeding attention and energy that is causing the problem.

Best of luck to you on your journey.


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OfflineSantana2015
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Deviate]
    #21922669 - 07/09/15 11:57 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Thanks for all the replies. I didn't expect anyone to give advice so quick makes me feel better and optimistic that it'll fad in time and hints will go back to normal. Since that day I never again smoked weed. I read after that day that it's best to stay away from it cause it makes things worse. The only worry I get is worrying I won't be that same person full of life and happy. I'm recently going through a break up and I got depressed a bit and blamed it on the shroom trip but I know for sure it has nothing to do with that.
My goal right now is to improve things about myself that I wanted to improve befor that day. Especially my health.


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OfflineSantana2015
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21922675 - 07/09/15 11:58 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Before that I was. Already dealing with weed anxiety and depersonalization. I was going through weed withdrawals as well.


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OfflineSantana2015
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21922681 - 07/10/15 12:00 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I also worried I loss my ego or something alone the lines like that. But if I would of lost my ego would I have known for sure?


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OfflineDeviate
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21922729 - 07/10/15 12:16 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

But why were you worried about that? So what if you did lose your ego? Is that a bad thing? It's obviously come back now. No harm done, see?

If your sense of ego was fully dissolved yes you would have known for sure as there would have simply been the universe there knowing itself without you to worry about whether or not you had lost your ego. My personal opinion is that this sort of experience is rare with mushrooms and what is far more common is that the ego partially dissolves or splits and this can be very frightening or sometimes enlightening. Does that sound like what you experienced? Basically you are still aware of yourself, but you are also aware that in that moment you are no longer anything close to what you previously imagined yourself to be and have essentially become something else, while a memory of your old identity remains which you cling onto and interpret the new experience through, resulting in fear and resistance. Does that sound at all like what you experienced?


its good that you quit smoking weed, in most cases it will make things worse although I once fixed myself after a bad trip by smoking weed. As soon as I smoked the weed (which everyone told me not to do but which I did anyway thank God) I immediately realized I needed to just surrender to what I was experiencing and then as soon as I did that, I recovered completely from the bad trip.

So I guess, try to surrender to what you are experiencing but without needing to smoke weed? maybe you dont need weed to tell you that, since I just told you.

My strategy is always to fix whatever goes wrong with me from drugs with more drugs and it has worked countless times. For example, I fixed weed anxiety with kava and I fixed a negative DMT trip with mescaline but I realize this might not be a good strategy for everyone. I consider myself pretty experienced with drugs and for someone less experienced I could see this turning out very badly. I am also somewhat crazy.


Edited by Deviate (07/10/15 12:19 AM)


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OfflineP.Zappatecorum
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Deviate]
    #21922872 - 07/10/15 01:09 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

If you were already dealing with depersonalization then the mushrooms didn't do anything beyond shed some light on a perspective of your life that you didn't want to see.  There's no unseeing that kind of thing, just moving forward and doing something about it.  If you think you're headed down the wrong path, then correct it.  I would lay off everything, start meditating and take care of your diet. 

Sure, psychedelics aren't for everyone, but it sounds like the mushrooms did their job and gave you a reality check.  Now you're at a lost for how to act upon the guidance they gave you, but that will come with time.  You need to think long and hard upon this and give yourself to careful reflection.  It won't be time to trip again until you've processed all that you experienced with this trip and are feeling better.  The mind is resilient, if you're worried you're broken you're not, you just need some time to recover from the shock of having your paradigm shifted for the first time.


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OfflineGoldenEye
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21922892 - 07/10/15 01:33 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Santana2015 said:
Since that day I never again smoked weed.




So you are listening. I asked because I always get in trouble if I don't listen to the lessons/epiphanies I get on psychedelics. As has been said here earlier, once you see, you can not unsee. So if I am pointed in a direction by a trip, and I end up not heading down it, I tend to give myself a very hard time. I know what I should be doing and not doing it then makes me depressed. There are two ways to deal with this, forgiving yourself and being loving, kind and patient about it and/or making that change...

Sometimes the psychs can even be a bit relentless because they have no regard for wether you are ready to embark on such a journey. They just throw the truth at you regardless of wether you want to deal with it or not. Sometimes ignorance would be bliss... But in the end, the more aware route is more sustainable from a long term perspective.

Just two cents worth from my experiences.


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OfflineSantana2015
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: GoldenEye]
    #21922941 - 07/10/15 02:05 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Thanks for all the advice.
I should just except the change that will come for  it will be change that I want and I create.
I'm just excited and scared of what the future might hold for me.  I'm just worried I'll change into someone that I don't like or that's ntohing like what I wanted. But I know that all the change that comes is the change that I make on my own. I hope I have a better personality of myself and a better life than the past 2 years I've been through.


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OfflineElff
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: Santana2015]
    #21922948 - 07/10/15 02:11 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Don't stress it and overthink, you'll be good, give yourself space and time to heal


--------------------


"No drug causes the fundamental ills of society. If we’re looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn’t test people for drugs— we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed, and love of power."  - PJ O’Rourke


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Invisiblejesuisravi
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Re: Need help recovering from a Bad shroom trip [Re: cube talk]
    #21923497 - 07/10/15 07:58 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

cube talk said:
Man I've never seen a trip affect someone like this, this is the danger however if you take a large enough dose as a novice.. got lucky the first time, second time it bit you

my opinion is go with a low dose 1.5 grams, maybe 2 grams and be in the happiest place/setting you can think of.

Music changed everything for me in terms of tripping. They can turn bad trips good in a heartbeat. I remember I was stuck in a rut of something like 10 straight bad trips, idk what the deal was but I knew this wasn't how shroom trips were supposed to be.

I listened to this one day out back and just like that, it all changed forever.






This music is relaxing, yes, but only at one point did it get interesting for me, a short section beginning at 2:20. But I can agree with you that listening to certain kinds of music can be useful to inflect a trip in a direction that will bypass train wreck.


--------------------
Most of my beliefs I acquired from my father and from John Wayne, and anything that wasn't ultra tough and ultra cool was to me ultra embarrassing. In fact, I lived in a state of near continuous embarrassment, never measuring up to the ridiculous standards I had accepted without question, applied to a framework of expectations neither I nor anyone else could meet.--J C Amberchele

almost nothing important that ever happens to you happens because you engineer it. Destiny has no beeper; destiny always leans trenchcoated out of an alley with some sort of 'psst' that you usually can't even hear because you're in such a rush to or from something important you've tried to engineer. ”
― David Foster Wallace, Infinite Jest


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