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Offlinethewanderer25
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I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing.
    #21889940 - 07/02/15 08:37 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Ok if you dont know you should im going to tell you about the whizzinator I got one and can now toke it up. :rainingjoints:  It's super easy to use and they didn't notice a thing. The only downside is that it cost me $140 but its worth it. Now I can care less about my probation. Fuck the judge the jury and the bitch ass prosecutor a stoners gotta do what a stoners gotta do. It looks like a life like penis
When you use it ask the probation guy to turn on the water when he does that flip the lever and it flows till its all gone when your done put it back in your pants just like a real dick. Now we can all get stoned  :getstoned:  :stoned2:


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21889963 - 07/02/15 08:40 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

pretty sure he'll catch on after the 2nd or 3rd time u ask for water.  Not to mention when he decides to feel your wanky up he'll know for sure, and you'll have to offer him a blowjob or go to jail


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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OfflineMilkdudTitties
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21889965 - 07/02/15 08:41 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)



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Invisibleluvdemboomers
loner with a boner
Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: MilkdudTitties]
    #21889974 - 07/02/15 08:42 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

seems like a bad idea but it's your ass on the line


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: luvdemboomers]
    #21889989 - 07/02/15 08:47 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

It looks just like my dick and I ask him to turn on the water like "I cant pee can you turn on the water it helps" The second he looks away from the fake dick I flip the lever with my pinky and it all comes out I give the whizzinator a shake and put it back in my pants. Its fool proof.


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Invisibleluvdemboomers
loner with a boner
Registered: 01/11/13
Posts: 5,054
Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21890052 - 07/02/15 08:57 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

thewanderer25 said:
It looks just like my dick and I ask him to turn on the water like "I cant pee can you turn on the water it helps" The second he looks away from the fake dick I flip the lever with my pinky and it all comes out I give the whizzinator a shake and put it back in my pants. Its fool proof.




no, it's not

If he for whatever reason becomes suspicious or has a hunch and decides to keep his eye on you (your dick) the whole time you are fucked

not that I care though, just sayin be careful you sound pretty cocky about this


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Offlinestratocast
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25] * 1
    #21890074 - 07/02/15 09:03 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Or you can get your shit together and stop doing the the juvenile stuff that probably got you put on probation in the first place. Just a plan b option for anyone who doesnt want to be a part of the system.


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InvisibleBill_Oreilly
ANIMALS (the RAINBOW SERPENT)


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Posts: 26,370
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: luvdemboomers] * 2
    #21890076 - 07/02/15 09:03 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Sorry OP but you did not "figure out how to pass drug tests"



the maker of the whizinator did.

youre like the time Obama got the nobel peace prize


--------------------
Something there is mysteriously formed,
Existing before Heaven and Earth,
Silent, still, standing alone, unchanging,
All-pervading, unfailing,
I do not know its name; I call it tao.
If forced to give it a name, I call it
Great (ta). Being great, it flows out;
Flowing out means far-reaching;
Being far-reaching, it is said to return.


It's just a shot away..


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Offlinezappaisgod
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25] * 1
    #21890081 - 07/02/15 09:04 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I got a better idea.  Stop smoking pot.  Thank me


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: zappaisgod]
    #21890167 - 07/02/15 09:27 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

dude is gunna be like, how does this kid always have a dick bigger than mine every single time he has to piss, is this kid gay?  i mean his dick always looks semi hard for some reason, does he like me i wondeR?  i should just plant one on him while he's pissing


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21890253 - 07/02/15 09:43 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

makaveli8x8 said:
dude is gunna be like, how does this kid always have a dick bigger than mine every single time he has to piss, is this kid gay?  i mean his dick always looks semi hard for some reason, does he like me i wondeR?  i should just plant one on him while he's pissing



Yeah, I imagine this is how most homosexual encounters begin :rolleyes:


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: hex_enduction]
    #21890287 - 07/02/15 09:50 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

u sound like u have higher expectations of said encounters, or do you just try to act and think the way society wants you to?  Not much of a free thinker are you


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21890293 - 07/02/15 09:51 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

makaveli8x8 said:
u sound like u have higher expectations of said encounters, or do you just try to act and think the way society wants you to?  Not much of a free thinker are you



I don't know how you gather that from what I said :lol: Whatever you say buddy


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: hex_enduction]
    #21890300 - 07/02/15 09:53 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

because u are defending it like u were offended, or like you knew exactly how it happens.  It was mearly a joke and you went all oooo thats not how it is.  once in a blue moon im sure it happens somewhat like that


Edited by makaveli8x8 (07/02/15 09:54 PM)


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Offlinehex_enduction
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21890313 - 07/02/15 09:57 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I'm not offended, you just came off as having a hilariously skewed worldview, and presumably, some sexual hangups. If I recall correctly from that other thread, aren't you a gigantic homophobe? Regardless, this thread's not about that; it's about piss testing which, evil as it may be, isn't some sort of gay conspiracy to touch your junk :lol:

EDIT: Yeah, sure, once in a blue moon there's probably some perverted dickhead officer who uses piss testing as a chance to molest dudes. I'll give you that :lol:


--------------------


Connoisseur said:
oh ive cried on drugs

sunshine said:
Tragic.  I told the cop not to do it but he didn't listen.


Edited by hex_enduction (07/02/15 09:58 PM)


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OfflineMilkdudTitties
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: hex_enduction] * 1
    #21890320 - 07/02/15 09:59 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

:canthelpbutlaugh:



Every gay mans dream job is to be a probation piss test inspector


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: hex_enduction]
    #21890370 - 07/02/15 10:14 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

hex_enduction said:
I'm not offended, you just came off as having a hilariously skewed worldview, and presumably, some sexual hangups. If I recall correctly from that other thread, aren't you a gigantic homophobe? Regardless, this thread's not about that; it's about piss testing which, evil as it may be, isn't some sort of gay conspiracy to touch your junk :lol:

EDIT: Yeah, sure, once in a blue moon there's probably some perverted dickhead officer who uses piss testing as a chance to molest dudes. I'll give you that :lol:




exactly it isn't about that, which is why YOU were so hung up on it u had to take it seriously and debate a joke

and yah, same shit happens with cops and pat downs, people are perverts and will take advantage of situations, if u can think it up, its prob happened before, hence i can say just about anything and id be right, just about


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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InvisibleMagicman69
All About the Benjamins
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21890546 - 07/02/15 10:51 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Be careful using that. I know someone who got caught using that and they took it super seriously. They revoked his entire probation and he had to serve his full 3 year sentence. I don't think it was his first violation though so don't freak out but proceed with caution.


Edited by Magicman69 (07/02/15 10:58 PM)


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OfflineDetached
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Magicman69]
    #21890623 - 07/02/15 11:10 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I had a buddy that use to have a whizzinator and he would get clean urine from his younger sister.. it worked well for about 6 months with weekly piss-tests but then one day while he was wearing it, the thing sprung a leak and it looked like he pissed himself.

That was the final day of his whizzinator.

It was pretty funny though.


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OfflinemndfreezeMDiscordReddit
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Magicman69]
    #21890638 - 07/02/15 11:12 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Those fake dicks used to pass drug tests have been around for a long time now.  I remember recommending one to a friend backi in like 99ish.

But for sure not fool proof.  Quitting smoking pot would be the SMART and CORRECT thing to do, you vagrant.

:loldongs:


--------------------
Nothing says love like grannies prolapsed anus!

quote]Urb said:
I know... Its fucked up... Ill fix it minyana..[/quote]


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OfflineCrystal G
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Detached]
    #21890647 - 07/02/15 11:14 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

My friend (who's female) swears by using one of these things. It's apparently a nasal bulb syringe that parents normally use to wash boogers out their baby's nose.

She says she fills it up with clean pee, sticks it in her vagina, and then when she sits down she uses her vaginal muscles to squeeze out the clean pee.

Sounds fucking genius, but I have yet to try it and see if it works.



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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Crystal G] * 1
    #21890662 - 07/02/15 11:16 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:

Sounds fucking genius




No what it sounds like is a great way to get some kind of weird yeast infection from having someone else's urine dribbling through your vagoo.

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/21883155

Also OP your posts sure are on point lately... :facepalm3:


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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OfflineCrystal G
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Psychonautica]
    #21890673 - 07/02/15 11:19 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Psychonautica said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:

Sounds fucking genius




No what it sounds like is a great way to get some kind of weird yeast infection from having someone else's urine dribbling through your vagoo.

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/21883155

Also OP your posts sure are on point lately... :facepalm3:




Yeah sure, but yeast infections can be fixed with a pill or a suppository. It's a lot better than pissing dirty on a drug test. I'd risk the infection, especially if it was my own piss. :shrug:


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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Crystal G] * 1
    #21890679 - 07/02/15 11:20 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Eh, forgot who I was talking to anyways.. I'm sure a strangers urine doesn't even cum into the top ten of weirdest shit that's been in your vagina.

Seewutididthar


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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InvisibleMagicman69
All About the Benjamins
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: luvdemboomers]
    #21890733 - 07/02/15 11:31 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

luvdemboomers said:
Quote:

thewanderer25 said:
It looks just like my dick and I ask him to turn on the water like "I cant pee can you turn on the water it helps" The second he looks away from the fake dick I flip the lever with my pinky and it all comes out I give the whizzinator a shake and put it back in my pants. Its fool proof.




no, it's not

If he for whatever reason becomes suspicious or has a hunch and decides to keep his eye on you (your dick) the whole time you are fucked

not that I care though, just sayin be careful you sound pretty cocky about this



Or says pull your pants\underwear down to your ankles. That's how my friend got caught. Obviously probation officers know about this device. Don't tell anyone about this who is on probation too or else your for sure getting caught.


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OfflineLuSiD enthusiast
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Crystal G]
    #21890866 - 07/03/15 12:10 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Crystal G said:
Quote:

Psychonautica said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:

Sounds fucking genius




No what it sounds like is a great way to get some kind of weird yeast infection from having someone else's urine dribbling through your vagoo.

https://www.shroomery.org/forums/showflat.php/Number/21883155

Also OP your posts sure are on point lately... :facepalm3:




Yeah sure, but yeast infections can be fixed with a pill or a suppository. It's a lot better than pissing dirty on a drug test. I'd risk the infection, especially if it was my own piss. :shrug:



Why risk a yeast infection when you can just not use drugs and pass?:shrug:

The legnths some people are willing to go, and effort, and risk, put into getting high that i see on this site sometimes makes me :facepalm:


--------------------
I'm addicted to coke, weed, booze, ludes and speed.
Not LSD, you can't get addicted to LSD, it was built by scientists.

I ain't got no demons that gonna get woke.


In erowid we trust.

Just take your damn pills and don't ask any questions, you'll be fine.


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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: LuSiD enthusiast]
    #21890884 - 07/03/15 12:16 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

LuSiD enthusiast said:
Why risk a yeast infection when you can just not use drugs and pass?:shrug:

The legnths some people are willing to go, and effort, and risk, put into getting high that i see on this site sometimes makes me :facepalm:




Because drugs are fucking rad.

"why risk a yeast infection having unprotected sex" (you can get a yeast infection in your penis hole, from fucking a dirty girl)

Because sex is fucking awesome and it's totally worth the risks.

Same with drug use.

Combine them both and well, sounds like my kinda party.


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21890923 - 07/03/15 12:28 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

FWIW, I'm extremely bladder shy. I cannot piss even if someone is so much as in a stall. When I was on probation this was a HUGE problem. I'd drink water until it literally felt like my bladder was ripping open and I still wouldn't be able to go. I asked the dude in charge of overseeing the tests if he could turn on the water or something (after many unsuccessful attempts) and he said he's not allowed to do that.

So, I wouldn't count on any tactic involving that. Not saying that they never will, but I wouldn't count it. I'm sure some would break the rules. When in jail, after surgery I couldn't piss. We spent hours in recovery with me trying to piss (they won't release you unless you can) but there was always a CO in the bathroom with me. It came to a point where if I couldn't piss in the next 10 minutes I was getting a catheter. I pretty much begged the guy to just stand outside the door. I pointed out there were no windows, I was shackled and couldn't climb into the ceiling even if it had access (it didn't) and that I wasn't going anywhere. He took pity on me I guess and just stood outside the door.

True I could've lied about being able to go in the first place, but when it's my health/life on the line, I'm not gonna bullshit the doctors.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Psychonautica]
    #21890968 - 07/03/15 12:42 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Psychonautica said:
Quote:

Crystal G said:

Sounds fucking genius




Also OP your posts sure are on point lately... :facepalm3:


Sorry man ive been smoking a good deal of pot. Man I do need to slow down actually im getting more and more paranoid it may be the brownies I ate but im really high. Bro how do you know if your house is bugged like what if my PO has got this whole thing bugged he was like looking around a month ago and some special guy come in. Good god im going back to jail if it is. :eek: There so stupid in there man I hate jail man i hate it. I just need to smoke the rest of my ounce and im good.


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21890976 - 07/03/15 12:45 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Does anybody know if it is even legal for the PO and that cop to bug the place like im playing music so I dont think they can here me so im good.


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25] * 1
    #21890991 - 07/03/15 12:49 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Never mind, still doesn't make a lot of sense, but it at least now doesn't seem completely random.

PO is not going to waste his time bugging your house. End of story.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


Edited by Shroomslip (07/03/15 12:54 AM)


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21891039 - 07/03/15 01:06 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

they might however be monitoring your internet connection and everything you are saying, just saying, your busted, maybe


--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Registered: 04/20/15
Posts: 10,854
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21891042 - 07/03/15 01:08 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Federales are already on their way.

RiP in Pepperonis OP


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21891047 - 07/03/15 01:09 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

About the maximum any PO is going to do is actually do the "random" home visits (and then it's only really if it's convenient for them).

POs don't need to go out of their way to catch people up. It's pretty much just a numbers and waiting game for them. They employ other tactics, like not piss testing you for the first half of your probation and then hitting you with one knowing you've grown comfortable.

Generally all they have to do is just wait and let you fuck up on your own, they don't need to go out of their way, so they don't.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21891053 - 07/03/15 01:10 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

I'll always choose jail over papers.

Every day of the week.

And I spent 90 days in jail and 3 days in a Fed. Pen.

It's still better than papers.


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21891061 - 07/03/15 01:13 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

makaveli8x8 said:
they might however be monitoring your internet connection and everything you are saying, just saying, your busted, maybe



Well thats a relief because im a good citizen and this was all a joke. haha my PO i got you man i was playing around so no need to piss test me it was a big misunderstanding you see i have done nothing wrong.


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21891076 - 07/03/15 01:18 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Im going to go listen to the dead for as long as necessary. I threw up like 5 minutes ago is that a bad sine? I only had like 2 brownies and 10 bowls. Last time I puked was from a bunch of dabs and edibles.


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OfflineShroomslip
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: Psychonautica]
    #21891087 - 07/03/15 01:22 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Psychonautica said:
I'll always choose jail over papers.

Every day of the week.

And I spent 90 days in jail and 3 days in a Fed. Pen.

It's still better than papers.



I wouldn't.

I know a lot of people see it that way, but fuck, at least on probation I get to decide when to eat, what to eat, when to sleep, what I do with my free time and above all, I'm not caged with a bunch of stupid fucks.

:shrug: If you can't straighten your shit up for awhile, then yeah you should probably just take the jail time. But I'll take the probation 100% of the time. You have even less freedom in jail. When it comes down to it and I'm on probation, I can be a "good boy" and just get through it and do all the stupid shit they want me to do. I thought I could beat the system at one point but quickly learned I couldn't and got my shit straight and stayed straight for the rest of my time.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisiblePsychonautica
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21891090 - 07/03/15 01:23 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

thewanderer25 said:
Im going to go listen to the dead for as long as necessary. I threw up like 5 minutes ago is that a bad sine? I only had like 2 brownies and 10 bowls. Last time I puked was from a bunch of dabs and edibles.




Yes, you threw up because your PO put government trackers into your edibles man, he knows.. HE FUCKING KNOWS.

YOU'RE GONNA LISTEN TO THE DEAD OF ALL MUSIC WHEN HE HAS YOUR HOUSE BUGGED MAN?!?! THAT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA.


HE FUCKING KNOWS


--------------------
The chances of you even being born, Were forty million to one. There's two parts of the statistic And I want you to live through one
3/8/95 - 7/10/15 Rest In Paradise, Brother.
Sheekle said:
yeah, i said i was afraid of psychonautica


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InvisiblePsychoslut
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21891095 - 07/03/15 01:25 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

luvdemboomers said:
seems like a bad idea but it's your ass on the line





You sound like a teenager man, look that bitch straight in the eye, tell them my bags are packed, show the po 500 bucks, tell them this is my plane ticket, i can stay here and keep helping to sign your check, or i can be in washington within 48 hours, dont get hard with me, im not pissing, you aint snitching, and its all going to be ok if you play your cards right.


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[quote]KristiMidocean said:
Good now thats clear.WHO FUCKING CARES. If I am fat u all keep pointing it out like its suppose to be a secret.LIke u really have nothing better to do then make fat jokes. If o know its like I do I know yall can come up with NEW AND BETTER SHIT . This shit is old and boring . I left in the first place cause this shit got boring not because of the fat jokes . Fat jokes dont bother me but seriously its old[/quote]


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OfflineSpiritualWarrior
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: mndfreeze]
    #21891099 - 07/03/15 01:27 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

mndfreeze said:
Those fake dicks used to pass drug tests have been around for a long time now.  I remember recommending one to a friend backi in like 99ish.

But for sure not fool proof.  Quitting smoking pot would be the SMART and CORRECT thing to do, you vagrant.

:loldongs:





THIS

Yeah my brother had one of those, pissed dirty a few times even tho he had it. I can't remember but I think they caught him off guard and he didn't have it with him... Court system is nothing to fuck around with, I'm 25 and already had to deal with it, I have a clean record tho... Pot is overrated anyways, take kratom instead its better. Hell, take all the legal drugs (not RC's). Caffeine, alcohol, nicotine. Is weed really what your life is about? I was in that boat dude, weed and the other illegal drugs was all I thought that mattered. They don't Get a head on you shoulders, think higher than that...Don't be a vagrant :mad2:


Edited by SpiritualWarrior (07/03/15 01:31 AM)


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Invisiblemillzy
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: SpiritualWarrior]
    #21891323 - 07/03/15 04:18 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

i did almost ten years (coke possession in my teens - i'm 37 now). i just gave it at least three weeks before my meeting with my PO and did what i wanted in the meantime. never pissed hot. if you're on probation for drug charges you may want to lay off the drugs altogether for a little bit. i did for a couple of years before really going back to doing anything.

another piece of advice i would offer is to be nice to your PO. they can fuck up your life if they want it. mine turned out to be awesome. not a bad guy at all. and he saw that i was doing what i was supposed to so he rarely sweated me. in fact he submitted a letter to my judge and got me off probation about a year early.


--------------------
I'm up to my ears in unwritten words. - J.D. Salinger


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Offlinemakaveli8x8
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: millzy]
    #21892132 - 07/03/15 11:03 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

no way dude, u gotta be the man in a probation situation.  You gotta talk to your probation officer in an al patchino/scarface voice that YOUR THE BAD GUY


Quote:

This is paradise, I'm tellin' ya. This Probation is like a great big pussy just waiting to get fucked.




Quote:



Tony Montana: Me, I want what's coming to me.

Manny: Oh, well what's coming to you?

Tony Montana: The Whizzinator, chico, and everything in it.




--------------------
We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #21892297 - 07/03/15 11:50 AM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Ya I was just high as piss but I think im going to be sober for a bit I smoked over a quarter once last night. I just love weed its my favorite thing to smoke. I have yet to try kratom I wish I spent my money on it instead. My favorite thing is LSD but I have yet to see any good L in SC. Sorry about my rambling my PO was poking around here about a month ago and he had a cop that had a dog I thought they might have bugged the place because they said something about how I don't have constitutional rights. Its all good though that's just me being crazy.


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Offlinedaz01
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: thewanderer25]
    #21892625 - 07/03/15 01:15 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

OP is obviously a fucking troll, look at all his posts and threads. :trolldance:


--------------------
Pain is temporary. It may last for a minute or an hour or a day or even a year but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it will last forever.


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OfflineTNK
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: MilkdudTitties]
    #21892705 - 07/03/15 01:37 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

MilkdudTitties said:





Best part of this thread.


--------------------
Edited by TNK (02/22/22 22:22 PM)


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Offlinethewanderer25
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Re: I Figured Out How To Pass Probation Drug Testing. [Re: daz01]
    #21892931 - 07/03/15 02:36 PM (8 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

daz01 said:
OP is obviously a fucking troll, look at all his posts and threads. :trolldance:



Yo I dont troll at all man im dead serious I just got to stop posting when im high because I say some dumb stuff. Sorry guys I make myself look retarded sometimes... Im going to stop smoking and sell what's left of my stash because I have been ultra paranoid lately im just going to wait till im off probation so I can smoke without having an anxiety attack.


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