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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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How do you use a bidet?
#21829149 - 06/19/15 05:57 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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I know in Europe and stuff they have bidets. I was always confused what they were used for and how people use them. To my knowledge, you are supposed to take a shit like normal then squat over the bidet and it shoots water into your butt crack and the poop water trickles out of your asshole into the bidet.
I don't see why people don't just use toilet paper. Wouldn't this be way less messy then having high pressure water shooting up your ass?
Just curious how these things work and why they are so uncommon here.
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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The picture you posted isn't a bidet. That's just regular toilet that has a little water spout installed by the looks of it.
This is a proper bidet:

It's normally installed in the bathroom right next to your toilet.
All it really is, is a sink to wash your ass so it's low like a toilet. It has both a drain and spout next to each other. The idea is basically to sit on it or stand/hover over it while the little spout shoots water up onto your butt.
You have regular controls for hot and cold water like a sink but you also have the extra control in the middle which changes the intensity of the water shooting up.
They are popular in most of Europe as well as South America. Every house or apartment I lived in while I was in Brazil then later on Italy had a bidet. I miss them. I would assume they are somewhat popular in the French parts of Canada like Montreal but I'm not sure.
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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1234go
Ban Lotto Champion


Registered: 07/08/09
Posts: 54,367
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they're more hoity-toity over there.
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zZZz
jesus


Registered: 12/28/07
Posts: 33,478
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bidets would save lots of paper that's forsure
why they;re not installed in every house hold around the world yet is beyond my understanding
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ballsalsa
Universally Loathed and Reviled



Registered: 03/11/15
Posts: 21,251
Loc: Foreign Lands
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: 1234go]
#21829252 - 06/19/15 06:21 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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the first picture is a "toilet seat bidet combo" (thats what i ask for at the supply house) toto makes several popular models. they are more common in the states than a real bidet(second picture) because they dont require their own hot and cold water supplies and their own drain.(installation is much cheaper) I have installed several actual bidets though. mostly for well off folks who don't really care how much it costs. ladies like em cause they can douche down their snatch with it too.
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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: ballsalsa]
#21829270 - 06/19/15 06:24 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
ballsalsa said: ladies like em cause they can douche down their snatch with it too.
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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Yea, they are indeed used as snatch cleaners as well. Not so much as a literal douche..At least I don't think.
All I know is that when I sell my apartment, my next place is without a doubt going to have a bidet when I remodel the bathroom.
The bidet itself is cheap, what I'm going to have to figure out is how to redirect the plumbing..rather add in more plumbing even if it's just cold water.
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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CosmicFool
Psychoholic



Registered: 05/14/06
Posts: 9,581
Loc: 203
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Quote:
Bitter Cactus said:
I don't see why people don't just use toilet paper. Wouldn't this be way less messy then having high pressure water shooting up your ass?
let me ask you this, if you stick your hand in shit are you going to use water to wash it off or just wipe it on some paper and go about your day? so why would you do any less for your ass?
I think the real question is Why doesn't everybody use a bidet?
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Edited by CosmicFool (06/19/15 06:41 PM)
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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: CosmicFool]
#21829394 - 06/19/15 06:41 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Toilet paper works perfectly fine and I don't have to blast water up my butt hole.
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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CosmicFool
Psychoholic



Registered: 05/14/06
Posts: 9,581
Loc: 203
Last seen: 11 days, 14 hours
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what's the matter, afraid you might like it?
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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Dude, it's not like people who have bidets don't also have and use toilet paper lol.
You wash your ass using the bidet then dry it off with some TP.
I guess some people use like a hand towel to dry off but I think that's pretty nasty to have a dedicated butthole towel.
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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Bitter Cactus
reformed bad boy


Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: kr0nik0]
#21829427 - 06/19/15 06:47 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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It just seems really messy to water blasted up your ass and have rivers of poop leaking out into the bidet. Toilet paper is quick, dry and gets the job done.
-------------------- Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.
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Ikarus
Whooooshhh


Registered: 06/13/14
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: CosmicFool]
#21829434 - 06/19/15 06:48 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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I lived in Japan for a while and a lot of the toilet seats over there have bidets built in. there's a button for your ass and one for snatches. I was skeptical at first, but they save a lot of toilet paper when you've got mud butt.
took me about a year to use one, as I generally avoid things touching my asshole that aren't me, but I'll admit they work pretty well. The water isn't blasting so hard that it goes in your ass, unless you've got a loose butthole I guess.
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ballsalsa
Universally Loathed and Reviled



Registered: 03/11/15
Posts: 21,251
Loc: Foreign Lands
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: Ikarus]
#21829487 - 06/19/15 07:00 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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"snatch:i'm bringing it back baby!"-ballsalsa
seriously, people in my demographic look at me funny when i call a pussy a snatch.
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Like cannabis topics? Read my cannabis blog here
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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Quote:
Bitter Cactus said: It just seems really messy to water blasted up your ass and have rivers of poop leaking out into the bidet. Toilet paper is quick, dry and gets the job done.
It's really only used for mud butt ime. Not something you use every time you take a shit.
When you get that mud butt I much rather wash it off in a bidet rather than having to take a full shower or sitting on my sink.
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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Amanita86
OTD Keymaster


Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: Ikarus]
#21829558 - 06/19/15 07:20 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ikarus said: I lived in Japan for a while and a lot of the toilet seats over there have bidets built in. there's a button for your ass and one for snatches. I was skeptical at first, but they save a lot of toilet paper when you've got mud butt.
took me about a year to use one, as I generally avoid things touching my asshole that aren't me, but I'll admit they work pretty well. The water isn't blasting so hard that it goes in your ass, unless you've got a loose butthole I guess.
Thats where you lose me, the whole power washing snatch and ass all over the place cant be sanitary.
That said, if you could incorporate warm water, and maybe a few pulse settings...Im in ..
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Ikarus
Whooooshhh


Registered: 06/13/14
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Re: How do you use a bidet? [Re: Amanita86]
#21829661 - 06/19/15 07:38 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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There was pulse settings and power control. Don't remember if warm water was an option.
They've got those ass/snatch washers so dialed in over there that the poo water just falls right into the bowl. No mess at all.
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