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D.M.T
Shroomery Contaminant


Registered: 10/31/09
Posts: 10,991
Loc: In your brain
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Bassfreak]
#21827974 - 06/19/15 12:25 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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That's what's up. I just had a cup of coffee so I'm thinking I might shit right now too.
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Bassfreak
ManBearPig



Registered: 08/24/10
Posts: 18,014
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: D.M.T] 1
#21827979 - 06/19/15 12:26 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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i love pooping at work cuz your getting paid to shit lol
-------------------- Tom Brady is a God Free Tom Brady
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Herbologist
Grrratata



Registered: 05/09/10
Posts: 7,471
Loc: Casa Bonita
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: billy jowl]
#21827992 - 06/19/15 12:30 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Beanhead said:
Quote:
Herbologist said: Baby wipes leave me feeling like my ass is just wet, I hate it.
The only issue I have is I drop solid redwood logs and they hit the water with force of a cannon ball and it sends water straight up my ass. maybe thats why its so clean. I was self-bidet
everybody knows to drop a few pieces of paper beforehand.
Get your shit together man 
Some people call it a free buttwash though.
You're so right.
Quote:
billy jowl said: The best ones are the "no wipers". I mean of course I wipe, but no matter how much you wipe the toilet paper stays completely white. Untainted if you will.
No wipers are the best. I hop up so happy, like I just saved 5 minutes, dropped kids off at the pool and my ass is sparkling
-------------------- Shroomery Law: Don't piss off the leftist mods & their friends!
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billy jowl
blah



Registered: 12/11/12
Posts: 1,496
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Bassfreak]
#21828004 - 06/19/15 12:32 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
D.M.T said: I actually usually shit while I shower. Feels great, don't have to wipe and the humidity is great for cleansing the bowels.
You sir have won this contest. I would imagine if you sit tightly and directly on the drain it's just like one of those play doh spaghetti makers.
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D.M.T
Shroomery Contaminant


Registered: 10/31/09
Posts: 10,991
Loc: In your brain
Last seen: 4 years, 1 month
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: billy jowl]
#21828028 - 06/19/15 12:42 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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I didn't know it was a contest, but I'm sure there's some sort of competition we could make out of it. My sister and I used to compete and see who could poop the fattest, longest, stinkiest and plumpest logs, with one of our mutual friends serving as the unbiased judge.
Speaking of that coffee turd I mentioned a minute ago, I'm letting it solidify a little bit before I get rid of it. Shitting is one of my hobbies. You know if you just shit willy nilly, you're gonna have a bad time.
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jboredone
Money-The root of all evil....



Registered: 01/19/12
Posts: 4,783
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: D.M.T]
#21828036 - 06/19/15 12:45 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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dude wipes....
-------------------- Peace Pot Micro-Dot God Loves You High or Not!!! In order to grow old and wise, you must once have been young and dumb!

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Herbologist
Grrratata



Registered: 05/09/10
Posts: 7,471
Loc: Casa Bonita
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: D.M.T]
#21828037 - 06/19/15 12:46 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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My shit brews for hours.
It either sits all night while I sleep then evacuate in the morning. Or it decides to hide in the morning and wait until I'm at work where I have to wait HOURS before I can go sit
-------------------- Shroomery Law: Don't piss off the leftist mods & their friends!
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Astral Pain
Strange

Registered: 11/10/14
Posts: 2,923
Loc: Chicago
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Herbologist]
#21828059 - 06/19/15 12:53 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Herbologist said: Baby wipes leave me feeling like my ass is just wet, I hate it.
The only issue I have is I drop solid redwood logs and they hit the water with force of a cannon ball and it sends water straight up my ass. maybe thats why its so clean. I was self-bidet
If I'm shitting in a public toilet I try to rise up a little to avoid the sphincter splash. You'll get the puerto rican dick slug up your ass in a public restroom toilet.
-------------------- "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out" -Bill Hicks-
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Dilsnique
Admiral Admirable


Registered: 04/22/14
Posts: 3,800
Loc: Netherworld
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Herbologist]
#21828063 - 06/19/15 12:54 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Many years ago, on a night after consuming 2 huge blue sno-cones, I excreted a blue turd. I used to have a polaroid of it, but I thing The Gubment swaggled it.
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Brown Buffalo
paisley superstar



Registered: 09/14/13
Posts: 821
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: jboredone]
#21828068 - 06/19/15 12:54 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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this is one of my biggest, I had to take a photo because I was at work and loved to leave so much love there 

Love those kind of talks
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Dilsnique
Admiral Admirable


Registered: 04/22/14
Posts: 3,800
Loc: Netherworld
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Astral Pain]
#21828071 - 06/19/15 12:56 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Astral Pain said: You'll get the puerto rican dick slug up your ass in a public restroom toilet.
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SunnyD
WiZarD oF LoVe



Registered: 04/29/13
Posts: 25,236
Loc: Planet earth
Last seen: 1 month, 22 days
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: ManianFH]
#21828073 - 06/19/15 12:56 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
mick said: Wet wipes. Detachable shower heads. All good things.
Really I just think we need more fiber in our diets though
FIber makes your shit not shittty
But I am always very hygienic, clean well I do
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        And to everyone who thinks life is just a game, Do you like the part you are playing? This is the time in life I am living! And I face each day with a smile My music Library of Synthesizer goodness
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Herbologist
Grrratata



Registered: 05/09/10
Posts: 7,471
Loc: Casa Bonita
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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I drop those on the daily
-------------------- Shroomery Law: Don't piss off the leftist mods & their friends!
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1234go
Ban Lotto Champion


Registered: 07/08/09
Posts: 53,885
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: SunnyD]
#21828083 - 06/19/15 01:00 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
jfischer218 said: Ive been doing it for about 4 years now and cant believe i ever did it differently.
I remember when i used to have a massive shit i would be sitting there worrying about the cleanup the whole time, it sucked.
Now i can take as nasty a shit as i want and have no worries, just give it a few wipes and hop in the shower.
My sisters boyfriend admitted to doing this today as well, and my girlfriend does too, which prompted me to make this thread
Anyone else wash after a dump?
i've been rinsing my ass for as long as i can remember, i run a tight ship over here.
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Brown Buffalo
paisley superstar



Registered: 09/14/13
Posts: 821
Last seen: 3 years, 9 months
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Herbologist]
#21828095 - 06/19/15 01:05 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Im quite short so that's not my normal size, at my place sometimes I need two or three flushes to get those things down the tube lol
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Herbologist
Grrratata



Registered: 05/09/10
Posts: 7,471
Loc: Casa Bonita
Last seen: 3 years, 1 month
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I'm tall, so maybe thats why. Sometimes my stomach fucking hurts when I need to shit and thats when i drop a freakin monster. Like so long it snakes down into the tube of toilet, out of the water, and slaps my butt cheek as it falls and then almost touching the rim of the toilet. Im pretty sure those are like partially going into my stomach and thats why it hurts
-------------------- Shroomery Law: Don't piss off the leftist mods & their friends!
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billy jowl
blah



Registered: 12/11/12
Posts: 1,496
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: 1234go] 2
#21828107 - 06/19/15 01:08 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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This poop thread has really taken off
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Astral Pain
Strange

Registered: 11/10/14
Posts: 2,923
Loc: Chicago
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: Herbologist]
#21828137 - 06/19/15 01:17 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Sometimes I shit so big my back feels better. Like it was making my spine not move correctly.
-------------------- "I don't mean to sound bitter, cold, or cruel, but I am, so that's how it comes out" -Bill Hicks-
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SunnyD
WiZarD oF LoVe



Registered: 04/29/13
Posts: 25,236
Loc: Planet earth
Last seen: 1 month, 22 days
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: billy jowl] 1
#21828141 - 06/19/15 01:19 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Nothing but shit commaders talking bout shit storm troopers, in this shiitery!
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        And to everyone who thinks life is just a game, Do you like the part you are playing? This is the time in life I am living! And I face each day with a smile My music Library of Synthesizer goodness
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kr0nik0
Ole' Salty


Registered: 02/13/12
Posts: 17,756
Loc: Western Slope, CO
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Re: Washing ass after a shit [Re: JvF]
#21828171 - 06/19/15 01:29 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Has anyone brought up bidets in this thread yet?
I really can't understand why they aren't more popular in North America.
It's specifically designed to get your bum nice and clean. If you've never had a gentle, warm jet of water shoot up your booty hole then you're missing out on on of life's simple pleasures. 
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“[...]the only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop and everybody goes “Awww!”
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