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OfflineShroom Kitty
Im just a kitty


Registered: 02/12/15
Posts: 553
Loc: Earth Realm
Last seen: 8 years, 5 months
IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL *DELETED*
    #21795632 - 06/12/15 12:57 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Post deleted by Shroom Kitty

Reason for deletion: ...



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InvisibleAmanita86
OTD Keymaster
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Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroom Kitty]
    #21795641 - 06/12/15 01:01 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Do what?


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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InvisibleRan-D
 User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 12/19/10
Posts: 16,313
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroom Kitty]
    #21795645 - 06/12/15 01:03 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Shroom Kitty said:
IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL




Quote:

Shroom Kitty said:
im going to prison.




Well which one is it?


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OfflineBitter Cactus
reformed bad boy
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroom Kitty]
    #21795646 - 06/12/15 01:03 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

Shroom Kitty said:
ok shroomery im not about to go in to detail at this moment but just be aware if I don't log on and tell yall what the fuck is going on im fucked and im going to prison. watch yalls back peace love  mother fuckers.




Who are you?

If you are turning yourself in fill up a condom with some drugs and stick it up your asshole before you go in.

Oh and don't drop the soap.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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OfflineShroomslip
Architekt
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 4 hours, 9 minutes
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroom Kitty] * 6
    #21795649 - 06/12/15 01:04 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

FUCK THIS SHIT I HATE THESE POSTS

If you're not gonna give details then don't fucking cock tease everyone with stuff like this.. GAWD


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleAmanita86
OTD Keymaster
 User Gallery

Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Bitter Cactus] * 2
    #21795650 - 06/12/15 01:04 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Or do..:wellhellothere:


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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OfflineBitter Cactus
reformed bad boy
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Amanita86]
    #21795655 - 06/12/15 01:07 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

If you are bisexual or gay you can sell or barter your asshole to gain favor from the other prisoners. You could perhaps get free food items and gain favor from your enemies.

I hope you do well OP.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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OfflineShroomslip
Architekt
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 4 hours, 9 minutes
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Bitter Cactus] * 2
    #21795662 - 06/12/15 01:08 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Uh.. no. You'll have some buff dude hating you and beating your ass for being gay all while raping you.

People in prison don't make a lot of sense..


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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OfflineBlack_Sunset
Amateur Anesthesiologist
 User Gallery

Registered: 11/16/08
Posts: 2,451
Loc: Somewhere California
Last seen: 5 years, 7 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #21795663 - 06/12/15 01:08 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

plot twist op is female


--------------------


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OfflineShroomslip
Architekt
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 4 hours, 9 minutes
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroom Kitty]
    #21795678 - 06/12/15 01:14 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Oh I got a tip for you. As soon as you walk into the jail with your new shoes/clothes or whatever, trade that shit off as quickly as you can so you can benefit from it. All that shit will be stolen from you almost as soon as you walk in the door. The second you take your eye off of any of it, it'll be gone. Might as well get something out of losing it.

Tell the guy with the severely worn and torn shoes you'll trade him your new ones for a pack of noodles or something.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


Extras: Filter Print Post Top
InvisibleAmanita86
OTD Keymaster
 User Gallery

Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Bitter Cactus]
    #21795691 - 06/12/15 01:18 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

It takes at least 2 bags of hot cheetos to get this ass mister man..

See what I do is on my first day I jump up on the lunch table, rip out a fist full of pubes and start eating them.  First step to running this bitch 101..son


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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OfflineShroomslip
Architekt
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 4 hours, 9 minutes
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Amanita86] * 1
    #21795701 - 06/12/15 01:21 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

You should try taking a dump on the tray of the biggest dude in there and then beating him with the shitty tray. That really sends a message. Not just "I'm not afraid of anyone" but "I'm a crazy mother fucker who will beat you with feces". The latter of course tends to keep people away.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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InvisibleshLong
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/04/10
Posts: 25,330
Loc: 'sconsin Flag
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroomslip] * 1
    #21795721 - 06/12/15 01:28 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Jail "burritos"  :homerdrool:

I always said I'd make one when I got out, but never did..
Take a large plastic bag.
Crush up 3 bags if flaming hot cheetos
And 2 bags of jalapeño chips.
Take 2 slim jims and cut tiny pieces
Throw the shit in to said plastic bag.
Get super hot water and slowly add to bag
Knead the water in to the crumb/slim jim mix until it's a thick paste consistency.
Flatten the mixture into a rectangle about 1/2" to 3/4" inch thick..
cut bag open to expose the concoction.
Add cheezewhiz or nacho cheese on the top from the comercery

There ya have it. Jail "burritos"
Bonus points if you eat it with nacho cheese doritos (if your local jail carries them)

Every cell block has the best burrito chef.. Find him and make friends with immediately


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OfflineKamelToeRodeo
Stranger

Registered: 01/15/15
Posts: 126
Last seen: 7 years, 9 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21795722 - 06/12/15 01:29 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Dude I bet op just got fucking raided


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InvisibleshLong
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/04/10
Posts: 25,330
Loc: 'sconsin Flag
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: KamelToeRodeo] * 4
    #21795728 - 06/12/15 01:30 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

KamelToeRodeo said:
Dude I bet op just got fucking raided



Must've sold an $85 1/8th to the wrong person :haha:


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OfflineShroomslip
Architekt
I'm a teapot User Gallery


Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,651
Last seen: 4 hours, 9 minutes
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: shLong]
    #21795735 - 06/12/15 01:33 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Can someone point to me to this post of 85 dollar eighths?


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline


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OfflineMilkdudTitties
My Nipples Look Like Milk Duds
Male User Gallery


Registered: 03/22/09
Posts: 3,796
Loc: USA
Last seen: 7 years, 5 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: shLong]
    #21795748 - 06/12/15 01:38 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

shLong said:
Jail "burritos"  :homerdrool:

I always said I'd make one when I got out, but never did..
Take a large plastic bag.
Crush up 3 bags if flaming hot cheetos
And 2 bags of jalapeño chips.
Take 2 slim jims and cut tiny pieces
Throw the shit in to said plastic bag.
Get super hot water and slowly add to bag
Knead the water in to the crumb/slim jim mix until it's a thick paste consistency.
Flatten the mixture into a rectangle about 1/2" to 3/4" inch thick..
cut bag open to expose the concoction.
Add cheezewhiz or nacho cheese on the top from the comercery

There ya have it. Jail "burritos"
Bonus points if you eat it with nacho cheese doritos (if your local jail carries them)

Every cell block has the best burrito chef.. Find him and make friends with immediately



:ugh:

all of those ingredients sound great, until you mix them together


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Offlinepropensity
۞̷ ̶۞̷ ̶
I'm a teapot User Gallery

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 01/06/10
Posts: 11,056
Loc: Bedrock America
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: shLong] * 1
    #21795753 - 06/12/15 01:39 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Quote:

shLong said:
Jail "burritos"  :homerdrool:

I always said I'd make one when I got out, but never did..
Take a large plastic bag.
Crush up 3 bags if flaming hot cheetos
And 2 bags of jalapeño chips.
Take 2 slim jims and cut tiny pieces
Throw the shit in to said plastic bag.
Get super hot water and slowly add to bag
Knead the water in to the crumb/slim jim mix until it's a thick paste consistency.
Flatten the mixture into a rectangle about 1/2" to 3/4" inch thick..
cut bag open to expose the concoction.
Add cheezewhiz or nacho cheese on the top from the comercery

There ya have it. Jail "burritos"
Bonus points if you eat it with nacho cheese doritos (if your local jail carries them)

Every cell block has the best burrito chef.. Find him and make friends with immediately



:cannotunsee:


--------------------


۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢ www.cactophage.com ۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢
̸ۨ͜۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟Dolphins of Dank۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆


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OfflineBitter Cactus
reformed bad boy
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/26/12
Posts: 11,773
Loc: Alberta, Canada
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: propensity] * 1
    #21795765 - 06/12/15 01:44 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

OP you should learn to play poker if you don't know how to play. Just play some online poker before you are booked in.

Also eat a massive meal before you go to jail and make sure you are sleepy so that you can just lay down and sleep through the first night easily.


--------------------
Taking acid and thinking you are a better man is a lot different then actually becoming a better man.




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InvisibleAmanita86
OTD Keymaster
 User Gallery

Registered: 09/26/12
Posts: 89,464
Loc: hades
Re: IM SO FUCKED IM GOING TO JAIL [Re: propensity]
    #21795768 - 06/12/15 01:46 AM (8 years, 7 months ago)

Yea that's not how you do that.


--------------------
:mushroom2:Orange clock, pencil:bouncysmoke:
"They threw me off the hay truck about noon...":fishing:
:mushroom2:*Mark 15:34:levitate::mushroom2::blueninja:
Gam zeh ya’avor...:sunny:


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