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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 13 days
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"You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" 1
#21765849 - 06/05/15 01:01 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Ive heard this shit so many times, both in real life and on the shroomery. Most often in regard to someone who is in a shitty relationship, someone who just broke up up with their SO, or someone who is sad about failing to find a SO.
And while I get the wisdom behind it, its total fucking bullshit. What does "work on yourself" even mean?
As life goes on you change. If anything, the more time you spend alone the less you change. You learn so much more from relationships with people than you could ever learn from reading some stupid book about asian philosophies or 100 new ways to prepare Top Ramen.
If "work on yourself" means not being totally dependent on another human being, I get that. And relationships do complicate your life, but if you really want an extremely simple life than you aren't the kind of person I would to know anyway. Complication is interesting, it makes life worth living. Especially on a website full of people that take huge doses of mind-altering substances, Id think easy life experiences would be the last thing they'd want. Like with all things, though, theres got to be a balance.
But people need to be honest with themselves and admit that in reality they are bitter about all the pain relationships have caused them and forgot about how much joy and growth it gave them
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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Katzenjammer
Lurker



Registered: 03/02/09
Posts: 418
Loc: Ontario
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: bloodsheen] 8
#21765859 - 06/05/15 01:04 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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It means "stop giving so much of a shit about finding validation through a relationship you don't want/need"
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dr.beaudoin
Stranger


Registered: 06/03/15
Posts: 25
Loc: MA
Last seen: 8 years, 4 months
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: Katzenjammer]
#21765880 - 06/05/15 01:09 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
Katzenjammer said: It means "stop giving so much of a shit about finding validation through a relationship you don't want/need"
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just your average apparition
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SoupSandwich




Registered: 12/08/14
Posts: 4,440
Loc: Lost
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: dr.beaudoin]
#21765978 - 06/05/15 01:36 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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When you really accept yourself, people will flock to your privates for the merest whiff of that old glory. 'Work on yourself' just, to me, means quit looking for validation outside yourself. Nothing lamer than neediness.
Fuck 'em. If they dont want you... show them what they're missing.
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my3rdeye



Registered: 08/10/12
Posts: 4,354
Loc: Canada
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: bloodsheen]
#21768425 - 06/06/15 12:39 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
bloodsheen said:O.
And while I get the wisdom behind it, its total fucking bullshit. What does "work on yourself" even mean?
Work on things that make you a better catch. Work out more, make more money, do less drugs. If you live in your parents house and have no job you need to work on those things because no girl wants a broke ass loser in his parent's basement.
"But people need to be honest with themselves and admit that in reality they are bitter about all the pain relationships have caused them and forgot about how much joy and growth it gave them"
No i don't need to admit that. I lost everything in divorce but am not bitter. If you cant let go that's your hangup.
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abltsandwich
JFK = Jelly Donut




Registered: 06/16/09
Posts: 11,537
Loc: Dildoville
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: bloodsheen] 1
#21768977 - 06/06/15 05:03 AM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Isn't someone telling another person to work on themselves being contradictory in the first place? Maybe when they start working on themselves instead of worrying about whether other people are, they should start by working on minding their own business.
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bloodsheen
ChemChaplin



Registered: 09/24/08
Posts: 7,659
Last seen: 4 years, 13 days
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: my3rdeye]
#21771502 - 06/06/15 06:57 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Quote:
abltsandwich said: Isn't someone telling another person to work on themselves being contradictory in the first place? Maybe when they start working on themselves instead of worrying about whether other people are, they should start by working on minding their own business.
Depends if the advise was requested. If they are just butting in Id agree, but some people reach out and the advise they are given is to work on themselves. Theres nothing wrong with accepting advise from someone if you think they have something you want. A girl/guy, a job, w/e.
Damn man, Quote:
my3rdeye said:
Quote:
bloodsheen said:O.
And while I get the wisdom behind it, its total fucking bullshit. What does "work on yourself" even mean?
Work on things that make you a better catch. Work out more, make more money, do less drugs. If you live in your parents house and have no job you need to work on those things because no girl wants a broke ass loser in his parent's basement.
Fuck man, thats so shallow. I'm not saying you're wrong, but I'm not sure I'm ok with that. Also, I feel like people that are told to "work on themselves" are from all walks of life, not just "broke ass losers." In fact I bet there are tons of rich hot people who keep plowing through relationship after relationship and some smartass tells them to "work on themselves."
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A cautious young fellow named Lodge / Had seat belts installed in his Dodge. / When his date was strapped in / He committed a sin / Without even leaving the garage. That's clever, isn't it?-A boy and his dog
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SoupSandwich



Registered: 12/08/14
Posts: 4,440
Loc: Lost
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: bloodsheen]
#21772293 - 06/06/15 10:40 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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All you fuckers need to go work on yourselves and stop worrying about people who say other people should work on themselves. This includes me.
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koods
Ribbit



Registered: 05/26/11
Posts: 106,059
Loc: Maryland/DC Burbs
Last seen: 1 hour, 14 minutes
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: SoupSandwich]
#21772318 - 06/06/15 10:50 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Easier said than done, but if you put your hopes into someone else you're gonna be miserable.
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NotSheekle said “if I believed she was 16 I would become unattracted to her”
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lessismore
Registered: 02/10/13
Posts: 6,268
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: koods]
#21772334 - 06/06/15 10:55 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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@OP because you don't understand it/see the meaning, it must be bullshit?
All is in the mind. Worrying about a problem makes it double
Our thoughts amplify our worries. So stop worrying is the best tip
Nature can help with that, sit in nature and relax, daily
It's when we find ourselves writing page after page after page, about how miserable we are, about how we lost our boy/girlfriend and job, that we REALLY need to relax
our thoughts have taken over our life...
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propensity
۞̷ ̶۞̷ ̶



Registered: 01/06/10
Posts: 11,056
Loc: Bedrock America
Last seen: 3 years, 6 months
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Re: "You just need to work on yourself, don't worry about guys/girls" [Re: lessismore] 3
#21772356 - 06/06/15 11:02 PM (8 years, 7 months ago) |
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Did you know that the spines on cacti serve to break up wind currents around them and thus aid in the fight against evaporation of their water stores?
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۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢ www.cactophage.com ۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟͢ ̸ۨ͜۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆ͯ̑͘ ̶̖̭ͧ͛ͬ͑ͣͦ̍ͧ͐͟Dolphins of Dank۞̷̛̗̗͉͇̰̅͒ͯͩ̆
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