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InvisibleSheekle
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Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 53,153
Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: MajickMuffin]
    #21692146 - 05/17/15 08:08 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

MajickMuffin said:
No. Fuck em. Don't go out of your own way to apologize, if you encounter these people and the situation is necessary to do so, then do so.

If you go out of your own way to do so, then all your doing is pleasing your own guilt. Your not helping them. Likely they don't even think about what you've done anymore.



That's a pretty bizarre viewpoint


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineSuspector
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Suspector]
    #21692166 - 05/17/15 08:13 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
Quote:

MajickMuffin said:
No. Fuck em. Don't go out of your own way to apologize, if you encounter these people and the situation is necessary to do so, then do so.

If you go out of your own way to do so, then all your doing is pleasing your own guilt. Your not helping them. Likely they don't even think about what you've done anymore.



That's a pretty bizarre viewpoint




I understand a little of why you shouldn't go out of your way. VVV


I want to apologize to one of my ex's of 3 years but she is better off without me.She probably doesn't give a shit what I have to say. She doesn't want anything to do with me. She knows I wish I could speak to her. She left cause of me. If she wants to ever speak to me she will be able to and then I can apologize for not being the same person I used to be, and causing her so much emotional pain. I wasn't loyal, never physically cheated, but emotionally I did, she found out, and it just wasn't the same. Really..I have no right to barge into her new life and bring back old feelings. She is with someone new, I will let her be happy


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I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.


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OfflineTybg
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: MichAnon.ael]
    #21692196 - 05/17/15 08:21 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

MichAnon.ael said:
[flash=,]http:/
/flash]
couldn't help myself, but man i'm glad i called that guy..




I KNEW IT.

I knew the moment I saw this thread someone was going to post this; and if it wasn't here, I would have taken it upon myself


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OfflineSeriously_trippin
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Suspector] * 1
    #21692214 - 05/17/15 08:24 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Yeah basing your sex life on a religious long term relationship is such a regression in my adult life. Set me back many years for NO fucking reason.


--------------------
R.I.P
Zombi3, Blue Helix
Modest Mouse
Zappa
Slothie
That Kid With The face
ShLong
Le Canard
split_by_nine
& Big Worm Forever
Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many :heart:


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InvisibleAdden
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Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Rebelutionsssss]
    #21692288 - 05/17/15 08:46 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

I've written numerous letters, called people, randomly visited them via mutual friends when I went back home, you name it. I really burnt a lot of bridges and laid waste to friendships as I was truly an absolutely horrible person and bully for years. Most were positive responses and people were receptive, some thought it was a Step 4 AA thing as if I was obligated to do it and informed them it wasnt; which ended up meaning more that I reached out. I got laced into by two people and that's fine, I remember what I did and it likely fucked them up. This isn't by any means dozens of people, but a few that particularly stood out as I made their lives worse or harder than they should've been. I'm one weird fucker, and kind of a bastard, but man I'm working on it every day and having mental health problems doesn't make it easier. One guy pointed out that he forgave me because I got what I deserved from the car wreck, mental health, and a family tragedy and yeah he's right. I did terrible things. Never killed anyone or stole anything but I was just a terrible person, and doing bad things and bullying people during their formative years can really twist someone up.


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Offlinestratocast
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Adden]
    #21692336 - 05/17/15 08:57 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

I apologize when i do wrong to people. However, if i understand this as a step in a 12 step program (which it may or may not be) you should only apologize when it won't bring more harm than good. Exes probably dont want to hear from someone that messed up their lives. If a person stole from Kroger everyday (for example) dont apologize to the owner. Maybe donate the amount of money one stole to make amends.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: stratocast]
    #21692346 - 05/17/15 08:59 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

I don't really see how a heartfelt apology can ever do anyone more harm than good, like simply hearing from someone even if it's an entirely positive thing would somehow retract from someone's quality of life? Eh, I don't buy that personally.


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineSuspector
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Seriously_trippin]
    #21692354 - 05/17/15 09:01 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Seriously_trippin said:
Yeah basing your sex life on a religious long term relationship is such a regression in my adult life. Set me back many years for NO fucking reason.




Yeah well, I hope she kissed good atleast


--------------------
I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.


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Offlinestratocast
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Sheekle]
    #21692419 - 05/17/15 09:21 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
I don't really see how a heartfelt apology can ever do anyone more harm than good, like simply hearing from someone even if it's an entirely positive thing woulok n.d somehow retract from someone's quality of life? Eh, I don't buy that personally.



Sometimes you just want to forget about someone and move on. This is an extreme example but what if someone killed someone close to you. An apology might feel small/fake and just bring up more pain.


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InvisibleSheekle
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: stratocast]
    #21692429 - 05/17/15 09:24 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

well that's a pretty extreme exampl


You don't have to necessarily let someone back into your life if they apologize to you or something.

I just mean like, i don't see the harm in something like:

"Dear ______,

I know you probably don't want to hear from me, but,

*Insert couple paragraph long heartfelt apology here*

So that's all, I don't expect or want a response necessarily. Just felt the need to say sorry. Have a great life.

Sincerely,

______"


--------------------
"Ur cat died because he hated u" - Koods
"I hope JSB kicks your ass one day." - Vandago
"you are the biggest 'internet guy' I have ever come across"- Jokeshopbeard
"The more I see you post the more I realize you're just this fuckin tie dye loser who trolls the Shroomery 24/7." - Herbologist
"Sheekle you cannot vile the dice of bullshit you have posted on this forum over the years, I like databases" - thelastoneleft
"or maybe i just come from a blood line of superior intelligence" - trees

R.I.P Kelsy, ?/?/?? - 6/11/16


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OfflineRebelutionsssss
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Sheekle]
    #21692463 - 05/17/15 09:32 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

:whathesaid:mostly what I was thinking


--------------------
:
To define is to confine.


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InvisibleAdden
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Registered: 06/04/03
Posts: 39,201
Loc: Flag
Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Sheekle]
    #21692572 - 05/17/15 10:03 PM (8 years, 8 months ago)

Quote:

Sheekle said:
well that's a pretty extreme exampl


You don't have to necessarily let someone back into your life if they apologize to you or something.

I just mean like, i don't see the harm in something like:

"Dear ______,

I know you probably don't want to hear from me, but,

*Insert couple paragraph long heartfelt apology here*

So that's all, I don't expect or want a response necessarily. Just felt the need to say sorry. Have a great life.

Sincerely,

______"




That's pretty much what I did. Handwritten letters are more heartfelt too because it means someone took the time to really give a shit. I'd never try doing this through text or even email. Like if you fucked up own up to it. I cried writing one of my letters, it's really fucked, I was bullied to hell until high school and became a rotten, mean bully myself. It sucked. One guy though, he ended up really messed in the head, I'm glad I never did anything extreme to him because he just lost it at the end of high school. It was traumatic to see and I stood up for him more times than I gave him shit. That guy still isn't right from all of it and he was the one person to not respond. He was bound to be shambled regardless and got bullied on top that's horrible. I think Soulidarity once posted his dad was bullied and his hands would still shake over it until the day he died. Fuck.


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Offlinedrege
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: Adden]
    #21693224 - 05/18/15 01:30 AM (8 years, 8 months ago)

This is what mormons have to do before they can be admitted into heaven.
If they are not forgiven they cannot ascend to 7th heaven, even in perfection they must go to 6th heaven.
Think about it . . .


--------------------

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OfflineBigHeart
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Re: Have you ever called people from your past and apologized for things you did? [Re: drege]
    #21693246 - 05/18/15 01:42 AM (8 years, 8 months ago)

To all of you worried about going to jail for admitting something, just check your state's statute of limitations.  Most likely you can't be charged anymore and they wouldn't have any evidence other than your apology anyways which isn't much if a case.


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