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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation 3
#21498993 - 04/03/15 11:52 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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So my brother and I were driving home from college for the weekend to see the family. I had just picked him up in my beater 04 Elantra and we were at the tail end of the drive - ten minutes from home - when BAM flat tire. Cars shaking so we pull er over into a ditch outside of the exit. I call Allstate and put on the hazards. No big deal right? We put on some radio and jam out smoking the ecigs.
Minutes later there's a knock at the window. I roll it down to see some young, creepy looking dude who's trying to be helpful. "you got it under control?" he asks, in an overtly feminine way. I begin to say yeah when the Roadside guy calls me to ask where our car is so he can help. I'm trying to tell the guy where we're at meanwhile this "good samaritan" is trying to talk over me to give the guy directions. I roll up the window so the guy can hear me and doesn't have to be shouted at by two people. the weird kid walks back to his car and keeps his hazards on. We see him call someone but we don't know who.
I give the directions and we wait some more. The kid is still waiting in his car and I start to get weird vibes from him. I try to ignore it and just wait. Suddenly there's cop lights, behind the car, and I realize a cop has pulled up for some odd reason.
Comes up and asks if we got a flat and I said yeah. I ask him why he came and he said he got a call about us smoking pot on the side of the road
So it turns out the gay kid was offended that we didn't talk to him more, and he called the cop because I had a legalize marijuana bumper sticker.
The cop glances in my car and somehow spots a pinch of shake near my shifter. You could see the excitement in his eyes, when he said "looks like youve been up to something here." Like a stray cat coming up on a mouse. He thought he struck big. So I began feverishly going through the car with my mind trying to think if I had left drugs somewhere. He makes my brother and I step out and starts patting us down... find a capsule in my pocket. "It's vitamin b5" I say with a shrug.
He turns over my center console, finds a pile of yellow pills, "that's vitamin D, we don't get much sun where I'm from around the winter". He takes our e cigs out "you got any concentrates in here huh boys??" He says with a snear, like we should be impressed that he knows about pot vaping. "Nah just nicotine sir".
It's at this point in time that the Roadside Assistance dude shows up and gets his jack ready to lift the car. So its raining pretty hard. I'm helping RA set up the jack, my brothers watching the cop, the cops searching through all my sketchy-not-illegal shit, and the gay dude is watching the ordeal from his car, like a bitch. It was a goddamned circus, all because we had a flat tire.
Finally, the cop gets bored and realizes he doesn't have anything on us, other than a quarter gram of shake and an old bowlpiece that I forgot I owned. He tells us to clean up the pot off my shifter and to have a good night.
The RA guy drives off, the cop peaces, and we pull out on the spare tire. Some reason, the gay snitch is still parked on the side of the road. Probably about to smoke a bowl himself, the bastard.
What a night. I'm just amazed that we got out of that clean. I guess cutting down on the drugs has paid off, even in the slightest
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?
Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse] 1
#21499003 - 04/03/15 11:56 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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I would have literally went off..
I probably would have punched him in the face repeatedly
-------------------- **need a check up?** **im a Doctor** i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Lucis
Nutritional Yeast
Registered: 03/28/15
Posts: 15,622
Last seen: 3 months, 27 days
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499006 - 04/03/15 11:57 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Well, glad to know a fellow shroomerite is OK.
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#21499008 - 04/03/15 11:58 PM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Yeah that dude could have got me into deep shit if this had been during one of my binge periods. Even then though the cop wouldn't have found my shit.
Still though, the nerve of that dude.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?
Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499017 - 04/04/15 12:01 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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You should have said something to him...
Or tell me a fictional story of what you would have done, if you could get away with it?
-------------------- **need a check up?** **im a Doctor** i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Ihateyou
Stranger
Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 568
Last seen: 8 years, 19 days
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499022 - 04/04/15 12:02 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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You really hate that guy huh
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#21499029 - 04/04/15 12:03 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quite honestly I'm not a vengeful person.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?
Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499031 - 04/04/15 12:04 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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That was satisfying.
Needless snitching makes me bruce banner like.
-------------------- **need a check up?** **im a Doctor** i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Prisoner#1
Even Dumber ThanAdvertized!
Registered: 01/22/03
Posts: 193,665
Loc: Pvt. Pubfag NutSuck
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Ihateyou] 6
#21499036 - 04/04/15 12:06 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Ihateyou said: You really hate that guy huh
oh the irony
coincidentally, I had a flat as well today, some really cute girl pulled up behind my car and stopped, asked if everything was OK and if she could offer us anything, I said we were fine, she asked if we were hungry and offered us grapes. she was really sweet, it was a wonderful gesture on her part
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Prisoner#1]
#21499046 - 04/04/15 12:08 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Wish we could have traded
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Adolin
Registered: 06/28/11
Posts: 8,292
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#21499052 - 04/04/15 12:09 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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intresting story. if that weirdo stayed behind me more than 1 minute after i rolled up the window, i would have gotten off the phone and called the police on him.
that weirdo could have been a serial killer dude
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ModestMouse
IM WALKIN ON SUNSHINE
Registered: 05/06/13
Posts: 19,227
Loc: Upstate
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Adolin]
#21499059 - 04/04/15 12:11 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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I seriously think he was a pedophile.
-------------------- Anyone got a lowpass filter in this biiiiash?
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Dr.Dankhead
Uhh...doctor gonzo?
Registered: 03/29/13
Posts: 5,187
Loc: Breathing down your neck
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499065 - 04/04/15 12:14 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Did you feel violated?
Your lucky he didn't jeff dahmer the fuck out'cha, like gresh said
-------------------- **need a check up?** **im a Doctor** i sometimes wish I was a wormy, wiggling all in the cold dirt...tickle tackle pickle dickle think a mackshift thought of broken words broken gears and words of conundrums..I'm not a weiner doctor so take that shit to dr. Gonz free boob inplant consultations.. Photo required
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Adolin
Registered: 06/28/11
Posts: 8,292
Loc: USA
Last seen: 1 year, 4 months
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Dr.Dankhead]
#21499082 - 04/04/15 12:18 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Dr.Dankhead said: Did you feel violated?
Your lucky he didn't jeff dahmer the fuck out'cha, like gresh said
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aler
♡♤♤♡
Registered: 07/29/13
Posts: 753
Loc: USA
Last seen: 8 years, 7 months
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Adolin]
#21499113 - 04/04/15 12:29 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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You should've grabbed the biggest rock and throw a rock through his window. Then call 911 saying someone broke into a car and stole it.
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Ihateyou
Stranger
Registered: 03/29/15
Posts: 568
Last seen: 8 years, 19 days
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Prisoner#1]
#21499134 - 04/04/15 12:36 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Prisoner#1 said:
Quote:
Ihateyou said: You really hate that guy huh
oh the irony
coincidentally, I had a flat as well today, some really cute girl pulled up behind my car and stopped, asked if everything was OK and if she could offer us anything, I said we were fine, she asked if we were hungry and offered us grapes. she was really sweet, it was a wonderful gesture on her part
Didn't even notice
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches
Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499218 - 04/04/15 01:01 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
ModestMouse said: Yeah that dude could have got me into deep shit if this had been during one of my binge periods. Even then though the cop wouldn't have found my shit.
Still though, the nerve of that dude.
I like the way you put it. Been there before.
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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el8tch
LHLHLHLHLHLH
Registered: 03/07/15
Posts: 464
Loc: Penn's Woods
Last seen: 8 years, 1 month
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: Lucis]
#21499256 - 04/04/15 01:15 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Quote:
Fennario said: Well, glad to know a fellow shroomerite is OK.
I've never seen that before!
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trekie
Metal man
Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 11,085
Loc: Larger cities
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: ModestMouse]
#21499263 - 04/04/15 01:18 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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You should have shot them shot them all.
yes the gay guy is a douche bag but the cop didn't seem that bad. The funny thing is this could have been avoided two ways .
Changing your own tire and being civil too the gay dude .Also as a pro tip take off the bumper stickers. It'd It'd just asking to get pulled over.
-------------------- I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.
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Enjoywho
Rags to Bitches
Registered: 07/06/09
Posts: 20,880
Last seen: 2 years, 8 months
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Re: The flat tire homosexual douchebag cop roadside assistance situation [Re: trekie]
#21499406 - 04/04/15 02:32 AM (8 years, 11 months ago) |
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Why should you be civil to him? He had it under control the dude literally has nothing else to do?
-------------------- "I don't give nothin' to nobody, I just pay the cost to do business." - Riley "Young Reezy"-Boondocks "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." "In the days of kings and queens I was a jester." "And then the great lord created bears... too many bears... shoulda really dialed back on the bears." Squidbillies "Can you start speaking words instead of your damn filthy lies!"- Louise "Bobs Burgers"
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