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OnlineShroomslip
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Registered: 11/25/12
Posts: 23,669
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21489871 - 04/01/15 09:11 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

:facepalm:


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline

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OfflineToiletPaper
Level 6 Lazer Lotus

Registered: 01/25/15
Posts: 115
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21489899 - 04/01/15 09:15 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

I've always been confused about the lord thing.  When they are talking about the lord or god are they referring to jesus christ or his father?  It seems like people use it interchangeably.


--------------------

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Offlineakira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ

Registered: 08/28/09
Posts: 82,455
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21489903 - 04/01/15 09:16 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

it's like a Japanese anime...
Quote:

Almond Flour said:
Quote:

Shroomslip said:
I know I'm going to regret asking but what makes the man from the non-Rome church any less likely to keep quiet than the Rome church guy who says he's not going to say anything either?



Excommunication, loss of pay and health coverage, lack of support from the entire Church, AND the Holy spirit protects confessor from spewing. The latter is the key thing preventing them. Other catholic  churches outside of communion with Rome don't practice the same faith. Confession is a sacrament. One of the direct ways we can see, feel, and experiance God on earth. Holy Orders is another sacrament which differentiates those outside of Rome. Only sacrament which can be performed outside the Churches authority is baptism. YOU could baptise a willing person with your spit in a time of crises.



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Offlineakira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ

Registered: 08/28/09
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: ToiletPaper]
    #21489909 - 04/01/15 09:16 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

ToiletPaper said:
I've always been confused about the lord thing.  When they are talking about the lord or god are they referring to jesus christ or his father?  It seems like people use it interchangeably.



they are one and the same: the holy trinity is that and the holy spirit, yo.

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OfflineAlmond Flour
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Registered: 12/26/08
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: ToiletPaper]
    #21489953 - 04/01/15 09:22 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

ToiletPaper said:
I've always been confused about the lord thing.  When they are talking about the lord or god are they referring to jesus christ or his father?  It seems like people use it interchangeably.




Well in the Old Testament the Jews were constantly referring to God as The Lord because they were not allowed to mention God's name (Yahweh) Only the High priest could mention it once a year. Thus everyone refered to God as The Lord.

These days when we are saying The Lord we are referencing Jesus. We call God....God, and the Holy Spirit is the Holy Spirit :shrug:

Interestingly enough the Holy Spirit is referenced as a person...Not a "thing" This realization kind of kills the new agey notion of simply meaning a Chakra or anything of the sort. Jesus sent THE Holy Spirit, not "A" holy spirit.

The Holy Trinity include all 3. 1 God yet all of the same substance. It's kind of a weird thing to wrap your head around but I suppose it's considered a mystery for a reason


--------------------
Hippies and Liberals love Pope Francis, so why dont I quote him for you guys. "There is NO SALVATION outside the Catholic Church" :morningtoke:

Edited by Almond Flour (04/01/15 09:31 PM)

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OfflineAdolin
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21489959 - 04/01/15 09:23 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

haha, i get it A_F, its april fools day and you claimed to have gone to confession! :lol: thats a riot!

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OfflineAlmond Flour
...get off my lawn!
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Adolin]
    #21489975 - 04/01/15 09:25 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Gresh said:
haha, i get it A_F, its april fools day and you claimed to have gone to confession! :lol: thats a riot!



I really Did bro, it's Holy Week for the Catholic Church. Was last chance to confess before the Easter vigil


--------------------
Hippies and Liberals love Pope Francis, so why dont I quote him for you guys. "There is NO SALVATION outside the Catholic Church" :morningtoke:

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Offlineakira_akuma
Φύσις κρύπτεσθαι ὕψιστος φιλεῖ

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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21489990 - 04/01/15 09:28 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Interestingly enough the Holy Spirit is referenced as a person...Not a "thing" This realization kind of kills the new agey notion of simply meaning a Chakra or anything of the sort. Jesus sent THE Holy Spirit, not "A" holy spirit. Notice the definite article?




calling it "THE holy spirit" does not make it a person. :rofl2:



i am THEE clitoris. personified.

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OfflineAlmond Flour
...get off my lawn!
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Registered: 12/26/08
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: akira_akuma]
    #21490005 - 04/01/15 09:30 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

akira_akuma said:
Quote:

Interestingly enough the Holy Spirit is referenced as a person...Not a "thing" This realization kind of kills the new agey notion of simply meaning a Chakra or anything of the sort. Jesus sent THE Holy Spirit, not "A" holy spirit. Notice the definite article?




calling it "THE holy spirit" does not make it a person. :rofl2:



i am THEE clitoris. personified.



There are also múltiple other passages which confirm this.


--------------------
Hippies and Liberals love Pope Francis, so why dont I quote him for you guys. "There is NO SALVATION outside the Catholic Church" :morningtoke:

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Offlineakira_akuma
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Registered: 08/28/09
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21490055 - 04/01/15 09:36 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

c'mon Holy Spirit, i'll take you downtown to fuck town!

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OnlineShroomslip
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: akira_akuma]
    #21490068 - 04/01/15 09:39 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

akira_akuma said:
c'mon Holy Spirit, i'll take you downtown to fuck town!



Some religious nut job in jail told me the worst sin you could commit in the whole of Christianity was to disrespect the Holy Spirit.

At first he refused to even tell me what the worst sin was, because he was afraid I would commit it and I guess be teleported straight to hell.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline

Edited by Shroomslip (04/01/15 09:39 PM)

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OfflineToiletPaper
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Registered: 01/25/15
Posts: 115
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21490098 - 04/01/15 09:45 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Shroomslip said:
Quote:

akira_akuma said:
c'mon Holy Spirit, i'll take you downtown to fuck town!



Some religious nut job in jail told me the worst sin you could commit in the whole of Christianity was to disrespect the Holy Spirit.

At first he refused to even tell me what the worst sin was, because he was afraid I would commit it and I guess be teleported straight to hell.




Yeah it is the only unforgivable sin.  But Catholics say that anything can be forgiven in confessions.

Also if you've never been to a confession that in itself is the unforgivable sin.


--------------------

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Offlineakira_akuma
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: ToiletPaper]
    #21490123 - 04/01/15 09:49 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Holy shit, then i guess what i said just made Almond shit his pants.

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OnlineShroomslip
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: akira_akuma]
    #21490158 - 04/01/15 09:58 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

You should've seen the guy shit his pants. He was my bunk mate too and would never shut up about Christianity or cease his endless attempts at converting me. He actually managed to make AF look atheist, as hard as that is to believe.

I would've been glad to be teleported straight to hell at that point. At least I'd of been away from him. After I committed the worst sin (immediately after him telling it to me) I got lectured for like 2 hours on how my soul was tainted now and I'd never be allowed into heaven. After a month with him, if I was a violent person (well more violent anyways, I kinda am if you push the wrong button) I probably would've broken his arms so he couldn't pick up his bible.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline

Edited by Shroomslip (04/01/15 09:59 PM)

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OfflineSeriously_trippin
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Almond Flour]
    #21490174 - 04/01/15 10:02 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Confession would be hilarious if I were the priest. Makes sense though felt bad about sucking dick cause your a religious freak and you felt the need to tell your priest and a bunch of very non religious people on the internet  :lol:


--------------------
R.I.P
Zombi3, Blue Helix
Modest Mouse
Zappa
Slothie
That Kid With The face
ShLong
Le Canard
split_by_nine
& Big Worm Forever
Etched in the sands of time in the shroomery and ever so beloved and deeply missed by many :heart:

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OfflineAdolin
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Seriously_trippin] * 1
    #21490206 - 04/01/15 10:09 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

for real :lol:

once i got bored of molesting children, id start telling children to say "5 bohemian rhapsodies 4 stairway to heavens" for their sins after confession(no matter how vile or mild), till i got excommunicated

sounds like good times

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OfflineIhateyou
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Seriously_trippin]
    #21490208 - 04/01/15 10:09 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

sodomites are frowned upon in the bible so any kind of oral sex is a sin right?

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Offlineakira_akuma
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21490223 - 04/01/15 10:13 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Quote:

Shroomslip said:
You should've seen the guy shit his pants. He was my bunk mate too and would never shut up about Christianity or cease his endless attempts at converting me. He actually managed to make AF look atheist, as hard as that is to believe.

I would've been glad to be teleported straight to hell at that point. At least I'd of been away from him. After I committed the worst sin (immediately after him telling it to me) I got lectured for like 2 hours on how my soul was tainted now and I'd never be allowed into heaven. After a month with him, if I was a violent person (well more violent anyways, I kinda am if you push the wrong button) I probably would've broken his arms so he couldn't pick up his bible.



sorta like removing the wings off a fly. :lol: and he topped AF. proof that to tell apart the religious from the insane is not so easy.

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OnlineShroomslip
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: akira_akuma]
    #21490259 - 04/01/15 10:19 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

Yeah man, he'd sit there reading me the Bible and quoting verses he said God told him I need to hear. He did the whole tongues talking thing to and then would snap back to reality and say it was the Holy Spirit and tell me what all it had to say.. Every time I thought he'd reached his limits on crazy, he'd manage to top it somehow.

All of this with me profusely telling him to just shut the fuck up already, btw. I asked and begged the guards repeatedly to switch me to another cell. I had the misfortune of arriving a day or two before a 23 hour lock down due to contraband in the unit. It was on lock down (meaning I was stuck with the nut job 23 hours a day) until I got moved to a different unit a month later.

The fucking doucebag would wake me up in the middle of the night because he had a vision of God with some message God wanted me to hear. I was trying to keep my good behavior and everyday was a struggle to not just punch him in the face. Shortly before I was moved, I was having the hardest time not just breaking his damn arms. I had even planned it out in my head but decided it wasn't me. I've never been that malicious in my violence, even when the right buttons were pushed. But damn it, he was pushing me to my limits!

Being locked in a concrete room with him for 23 hours a day was cruel and unusual punishment.


--------------------
With my face against the floor I can’t see who knocked me out of the way.
I don’t want to get back up but I have to so it might as well be today.
Nothing appeals to me no one feels like me, I’m too busy being calm to disappear.
I’m in no shape to be alone contrary to the shit that you might hear.


You can't wake up, this is not a dream. You're part of a machine, you are not a human being
With your face all made up, living on a screen. Low on self esteem, so you run on gasoline

Edited by Shroomslip (04/01/15 10:23 PM)

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Offlineakira_akuma
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Registered: 08/28/09
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Re: Went to Confession today.... [Re: Shroomslip]
    #21490278 - 04/01/15 10:23 PM (8 years, 11 months ago)

yikes, i'm getting bad vibes just ... imagining that. :lol: speaking in tongues, and he says it was the holy spirit... god was "telling him" things? dude, i'd... hahaha, i'd be ready,... ready for shit to go down. just roar at him like the Devil and throat slam him. :crankey:

Quote:

The fucking doucebag would wake me up in the middle of the night because he had a vision of God with some message God wanted me to hear.




LOL awaken in the middle of the night... LOL, wow... just to tell YOU something. fucking guy must have had many thoughts about how you. he must have been in the midst of a major solipsistic living nightmare.

that's freaky.

and also, BTW, Almond Flour approves of this crazie's messages. :lol:

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