|
wakeme111
Stranger
Registered: 06/19/09
Posts: 164
Last seen: 6 months, 8 days
|
Thoughts of hurting myself
#21450815 - 03/24/15 11:39 AM (9 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Sometimes I will have thoughts of hurting myself that are seemingly random. For example, if I happen to see a pair of scissors or a knife I will have a quick thought of stabbing myself with them. Or sometimes banging my head against a wall.
Other times I will have a thought saying I should just kill myself. I suppose I am depressed, but I dont feel suicidal. I try to interpret thoughts like that as not being literal. In the sense that I should kill the person I am because I am not happy with myself and become the person I can be.
Has anyone else had similar thoughts of hurting themselves or that they should kill themselves, without feeling suicidal?
|
Mind-Rip
Strange-er


Registered: 02/02/14
Posts: 255
Last seen: 4 years, 4 months
|
Re: Thoughts of hurting myself [Re: wakeme111]
#21450882 - 03/24/15 11:52 AM (9 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Yea I totally have. Like if I see a car coming I might have the thought of what it would be like to dive under the tire. I interperet it as a type if curiosity. Like not really morbid but just checking in with my mortality sort of thing. I dont want to ACTUALLY do it. It's probably pretty normal, people just dont want to bring it up cuz itll make people worry.
Are you overly sad?
-------------------- The mushroom is love. The mushroom is life. Eateth of the fruit body And you will become one with everything.
|
wakeme111
Stranger
Registered: 06/19/09
Posts: 164
Last seen: 6 months, 8 days
|
Re: Thoughts of hurting myself [Re: Mind-Rip]
#21451041 - 03/24/15 12:33 PM (9 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Quote:
Mind-Rip said: Yea I totally have. Like if I see a car coming I might have the thought of what it would be like to dive under the tire. I interperet it as a type if curiosity. Like not really morbid but just checking in with my mortality sort of thing. I dont want to ACTUALLY do it. It's probably pretty normal, people just dont want to bring it up cuz itll make people worry.
Are you overly sad?
Yeah I will have thoughts when driving too of crashing. Just like a quick flash of an image in my mind, but nothing I want to act on. It is just kind of disturbing.
I am definitely not close to my ideal self, but I have been improving since some recent lows. I do find such thoughts are usually more present when I am not happy with myself. Especially the random thought saying I should kill myself. I am not suicidal though, so I take it as wanting to change the person I have become.
I also find it more common when I have smoked weed, which is quite frequent. I am introverted to begin with, and I find weed magnifies that, making me feel borderline schizo at times.
|
SpiritualWarrior
Stranger


Registered: 09/15/13
Posts: 437
Last seen: 1 year, 3 months
|
Re: Thoughts of hurting myself [Re: wakeme111]
#21451106 - 03/24/15 12:52 PM (9 years, 1 month ago) |
|
|
Stop the weed and use CBD instead. You're just thinking about things like that too much, the reason those things effect you is you know its the wrong thing to do and that's why it has that kind of pull for you to do them. Think of it like reverse-psychology. I too have had thoughts of jumping off from a car park very high up, but that is just because you know that its the wrong thing and are thinking about the fact that its a possibility. I think you should just put the knifes and scissors out of sight from now on and when driving, try to distract yourself.
I've had the thought of crashing too when driving, like doing it on purpose. There's nothing wrong with you its just how your mind is reacting to a certain thought of something, like the possibility of something bad. Then you want do the exact thing you know you shouldn't do. Now if you go on and think this is what you need to do then you're really ignorant as to how your own mind works.
Edited by SpiritualWarrior (03/24/15 12:55 PM)
|
Mind-Rip
Strange-er


Registered: 02/02/14
Posts: 255
Last seen: 4 years, 4 months
|
|
I make it into a type of meditative practice. sorta like you know that this thought is crazy so you're able to say wow this is a crazy thought I'm having right now. if you're able to separate your thoughts from reality and your actual needs then that will be one more step towards being the best version of yourself. So id say try using these negative and scary thoughts in a positive way to better learn how ur mind works.
Remember, you always have a choice. Sometimes it wont feel that way but it's true. Just keep it real bro and cut down on the bud a bit too
-------------------- The mushroom is love. The mushroom is life. Eateth of the fruit body And you will become one with everything.
|
|