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Thanksgiving...at time to give thanks, to experience family, friends, and all other loved ones...and somehow, this became one of reflection for me. i stopped drinking about 2 months ago (well, at least getting charged witha dui is good for something, huh?) and didn't drink tonight. But i thought on all i was thankful for, and all that i have done, ad all that i lost...i was with my family and familial friends, who have known me since birth...with my little redheaded terror of a cousin (2years 6 months...and feisty!) And the person i loved wasn't there. i was happy, but somehow it isnt complete. I miss her, and i'm glad that we're friends, but i cant help being hurt and lonely because thats all we'll ever be. So it's a happy day with a tinge of grey..crying with a smile on your face is an intresting thing. well, i'm still here, i'm whole again (possibly for the first time in my life) and i have hope for the future...but it still hurts, knowing how far you've fallen from what you could be, and how much work it's going to take to reach your potential...and it still hurts, knowing that you've managed to destroy every real, loving relationship you've ever been in..and yet i smile. Happy thanksgiving..dont take em for granted. Stay frosty all R.C.
-------------------- "..all those molecules thrashing their kinky little tails, hot for destiny and the street." Gibson