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Anonymous #16
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Re: Everyday I get closer to buying a gun [Re: Anonymous #15] 1
#21373582 - 03/07/15 08:07 AM (9 years, 2 months ago) |
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op, put the gun away. even if you do do it in the bathtub, somebody is going to find your body. somebody is going to have to clean up the spatter, blood and brain etc. if you live with your parents, do NOT do it in their house. you will literally ruin the rest of their lives because no matter what, they will blame themselves.
get yourself some amyl nitrate and big vibrating ass dildo. at least then you have some pleasure and something to live for. and hey, maybe one day you'll get lazy about cleaning off your ass plug and give yourself an infection, and then die. ya never know.
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Anonymous #1
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Re: Everyday I get closer to buying a gun [Re: Anonymous #16]
#21373683 - 03/07/15 08:39 AM (9 years, 2 months ago) |
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My dad isn't a part of my life, my mom died months ago, my grandma died months ago, my grandpa died a year or two ago. I was raised by my grandparents. I have no "parents" left anymore. Amyl Nitrate only gives me a head ache. I'm trying to get a better job so I can't really use weed to calm myself down anymore. Was about the only thing that ever kept all this shit at bay or kept me in some sense of control.
My life is a huge pile of shit right now and the more I try and pull myself out of it, the deeper the hole gets. It was shit before my mom and granmda died. Their deaths caused a snowball effect in my life that has really put me in a fucked up place and then you couple it with my long history of psychological problems, it only amplifies everything.
I have never been a stable person and I'm feeling less and less stable by the day. I keep hinging all my hopes on getting "better" on shit that just keeps falling through, slowly destroying what little hope I have left to get through my life. Everything just keeps compounding and getting worse. Life is literally beating me into submission day by day.
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Anonymous #15
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Re: Everyday I get closer to buying a gun [Re: Anonymous #1]
#21374489 - 03/07/15 12:56 PM (9 years, 2 months ago) |
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Daily exercise will make you feel a whole lot better.
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Anonymous #17
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Re: Everyday I get closer to buying a gun [Re: Anonymous #15]
#21379169 - 03/08/15 04:52 PM (9 years, 2 months ago) |
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I was just like you OP, focusing on all the negatives in my life. Shit was unbearable, constantly thinking of coping the last bag of dope to end my miserable existence. My life had become the mother of all shitstorms, pelted with shit minute after minute. Then one day, im watching youtube and come across this audiobook by Steve Chandler 100 Ways to motivate yourself. As I listened, this guy that wrote the book was reading the book and I noticed that the guy trying to motivate me sounded like the dude on the couch from half-baked. I fuckin LOST it! I finally seen the silver lining that all these people talk about. You are what you focus on, I was dwelling on everything negative in my life. I was the one making life unbearable, not external circumstances. From then on, my life has done a 180. Please listen to that audiobook and reconsider your lot in life, the least you'll get is a chuckle and at best, you'll have a new lease on life. You have to keep putting one foot in front of the other, regardless of how heavy your legs may be, shit does get better. I don't want to see you become the guy I was considering to be. Namaste
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Alan Rockefeller
Mycologist

Registered: 03/10/07
Posts: 48,392
Last seen: 1 day, 21 hours
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Re: Everyday I get closer to buying a gun [Re: Anonymous #1]
#21382704 - 03/08/15 04:52 PM (9 years, 2 months ago) |
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