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OfflineRoflspammer
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Registered: 12/05/12
Posts: 1,932
Loc: New Hampshire
Last seen: 11 hours, 34 minutes
My depression is cyclic
    #21176322 - 01/25/15 07:51 PM (9 years, 3 months ago)

I'm back in a sad mood. I don't understand why this keeps happening... well I do but I don't know how to break it

I tripped yesterday and I began questioning what the point of any of my actions are. It seems like everything we do is to become desirable to someone else. Why have friends? So you can appear to be desirable to other people and then they will befriend you, which will make you even more desirable.

I'm so tired of the pointlessness and superficiality. I think I look good, but I'm just awkward as fuck because I don't find social interaction enjoyable. I work out, I eat right and I am pursuing a degree but I just feel empty as fuck. I hate weekends because everyone just goes out and carries on and I'm like fuck that I just want the week to come back so I can do my busy work and get distracted and not feel the pain of social isolation. I mean, I have friends here but I feel so empty. I'm not a fun guy I have had a lot of growing pains that just make me take everything too seriously...
People think I'm stuck up but I'm just stuck inside my skull. There's not much meaning to anything. Every now and again my mood gets better and I feel good but then eventually I just return to base line of sadness

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OfflineSpacerific
- - - >
Male


Registered: 10/13/12
Posts: 4,923
Last seen: 9 years, 1 month
Re: My depression is cyclic [Re: Roflspammer]
    #21177827 - 01/26/15 05:46 AM (9 years, 3 months ago)

Dude. Just have A LOT more sex and massages. If you're already working out and eating right, all you need is a few hugs and massages here and there, some sex, and absolutely don't worry about going out and being fake. As you've already noticed, that's a complete waste of time and energy.

Retreating indoors in the weekend is AOK, just do it WITH a girl to play with, to do some art or work or study with.

Quote:

There's not much meaning to anything.



There isn't. It's like an open-ended sandbox game, like GTA. YOu get the cars, the girls, the city, what you do with it is up to you. You can climb this or that ladder, face this or that challenge, or continually stare at a wall thinking this game sucks, this game sucks. But deep down you know it doesn't. Just a couple of people that you've seen so far, you don't like their way of playing it. There are many other styles to play it. Maybe you haven't seen them yet (in which case, couchsurf and travel more) but they're definitely out there.

Oh yeah, couchsurfing.org. Either host or travel with it, or both. If you have the weekends free (excessively free) then start considering this stuff. CS is great, even if you just host, because you get these wonderful travelers from literally all corners of the world. When you see a 20 year old skinny girl pursuing her dreams and traveling the world, it gives you a ton of balls and backbone to start pursuing yours more. I've been in places with a lot of these backpackers and I can tell you it made me get my head out of my ass a lot more :thumbup:

Life may have no default meaning until you give it one, but when you do, this happens:



Show up to a few of these this year, you'll be A LOT less depressed if you do :biggrin:


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16

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Offlinehappydegenerate
well whatever nevermind
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Registered: 01/23/15
Posts: 245
Loc: the eternal friendzone
Last seen: 8 years, 10 months
Re: My depression is cyclic [Re: Spacerific]
    #21177917 - 01/26/15 06:59 AM (9 years, 3 months ago)

You mention the "pain of social isolation". Is the root of your depression loneliness?

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