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i like cow poo
Nature Lover


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Is my sister bipolar?
#21169269 - 01/23/15 10:41 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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My sister is around 18 years old. No I won't post pics. Anyways, shes been acting depressed/bitchy for about 3 years. Depression runs in the family. ... A couple weeks ago she had a small argument with my family and all of a sudden flipped her shit. She threw a glass on the floor shattering it to a million pieces and started screaming "fuck you all! you know I'm depressed! fuck you all!" A complete overreaction to say the least. ... Whenever I try talking to her about changing her lifestyle such as being nicer to her family, using less chemicals/air fresheners, getting better sleep, etc. she acts like I'm a fucking misquoto in her ear. (I've only tried to give her advice twice and it was in a respectful manner) ... Something is fucked up in her head. Its pretty disturbing. Anyways whats your alls take on the situation? Shes been trying different meds. Is she just being depressed and choosing to be a huge bitch? Or can she not help it much?
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wu wei



Registered: 06/23/12
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"Shes been trying different meds. Is she just being depressed and choosing to be a huge bitch? Or can she not help it much?"
This is what sounds suspect to me. Well if she's on meds, most likely it is for something she cannot help. Especially if they are stimulants or benzos. Or antidepressants. Even if she is depressed, you can't minimize that. Depression on its own is difficult enough to deal with. Just be supportive, find out if she's doing MDMA or drugs known for their long term depression inducing qualities. She's also a teenager so there's that. Arguably 17 or 18 is the hardest or best part of being a teenager.
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1. Sentient beings are numberless. We vow to save them all. 2. Delusions are endless. We vow to cut through them all. 3. The teachings are infinite. We vow to learn them all. 4. The Buddha Way is inconceivable. We vow to attain it.
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DrRedBush
I'm unpasteurized


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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: wu wei]
#21169328 - 01/23/15 10:58 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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I agree
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Roker
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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: wu wei]
#21169332 - 01/23/15 10:59 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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It takes the body 3-4 weeks to settle down on anti-depressants and people have good or bad reactions to various combinations. So you just have to deal with it until the doctors sort out something that suits her.
It's a fact that healthy lifestyle choices are a better way to deal with most depression, it's also a fact that depressed people don't make healthy lifestyle choices. Be patient and let the drugs kick in then she might be more receptive to some good advice.
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Mr. Bojangles
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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: Roker]
#21169813 - 01/24/15 02:01 AM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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For what it's worth my sister acted the same way in her mid-to-late teens and she's fine now, in her twenties. I just thought it was being a teenage girl...being exceptionally moody, turning to substances to help, not taking any advice whatsoever, and just general irrational thoughts and behaviors...but that could be me casting a wide and inappropriate stereotype...
-------------------- "It is dangerous to be right in matters on which the established authorities are wrong." Francois-Marie Arouet
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
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Well instead of focusing on the sister, how about we take a look at the context she lives in?
How IS your family?
Are they fun? Are they engaging? Are they smart, is there a lot of harmonious, well design activity taking place at your house? Are there nice pleasant meals or is it chaos eating? Is there music playing or mindless TV noise? Is there incense and essential oils in the air, or tobacco smoke, random stench and whatever else? When parents talk, are they energetic, insightful, balanced and happy people, or mumbling, negative, critical and tired people, bringing the energy down, bad vibes?
I ask these things because I've seen contexts that either make me snap, or make me waste A TON of energy not bitchslapping people that absolutely are asking for it with every fucking molecule of their body. I'm sure other simpletons at their level would think my reactions extreme or whatever, but that's just if they analyze based on 5 minute interactions. If they analyze it in the grander scheme of things, some people absolutely don't cut it and one shouldn't be around them.
Is there anything that she does like? Is she being seriously supported in those matters or just meh, get a real job etc, as some parents are prone to do?
Before I found out my way to thrive (festivals, art, psychedelics, backpacking around different countries) I was a ticking time bomb of anger and frustration back home, because everything these people said just reinforced my perception that yes, people are EXCRUCIATINGLY boring (compared to my needs and expectations) and life will ALWAYS be that crappy. It isn't, it was just one context that made me feel that way. The fact that I was angry and feeling terrible in it wasn't a disease on my part, just not having found enough stimulation that fulfills me emotionally.
So rather than pushing more lifestyle ideas on the sister, I'd start simply asking more questions, so she can get behind some changes of her own free will.
Things like what does she want to do? Like to do? That's the stuff that I wish people had asked me back in the day, and spend a little more time with me, googling and searching, analyzing, dispelling fears about whether or not I can do it.
How's the food in your house? Specifically how's the Omega 3 / Omega 6 balance?
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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i like cow poo
Nature Lover


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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: Spacerific]
#21171216 - 01/24/15 01:48 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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Thanks for the input guys. My family will continue to be as supportive as possible.
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Spacerific
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Sooo in short, you can't be bothered to even answer a couple of questions to get a meaningful convo going? Is this your level of involvement here?
What can I say, awesome
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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i like cow poo
Nature Lover


Registered: 10/20/09
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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: Spacerific]
#21171316 - 01/24/15 02:16 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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We have good food. We don't try to entertain her cause shes a bitch. We are nice to her. You ask alot of questions. I guess I'm lazy. She's unwilling to change anything right now. And now we don't have any air pollution in our house besides the shit febreeeze shes sprays in her room. I've told her to stop because that shits toxic. I'm not really that involved I just try to be friendly when possible.
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Spacerific
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Registered: 10/13/12
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Well, I tried. Maybe some other posters will have more insights here, but to me at least it seems you wanted to vent and hope to hear some simple solution, like yes she's bipolar (pill her up) or no, she's not, she's got this other dsease/dysfunction (pill her up this other way).
Anything that doesn't involve too much attention, thought or effort, let alone actual change.
Quote:
I guess I'm lazy
Well at the very least not that interested in this sister thing, which is fine 
Quote:
We have good food
Omega 3? Ratio of grains and grain fed beef to greens and fish and grass fed stuff? No? Don't know don't care? I'm not saying you should necessarily, especially if you're not the one doing the cooking. I'm just pointing out that being or not being an irritated bitch does have at least SOME correlation with what food is being eaten. I'd absolutely look at how much MSG is in her diet for instance, as well as artificial sweeteners. Does she drink water or Monster drink and Coca Cola and other variations of colored water crap?
On a more simple note maybe she's just horny/lonely and needs a dude in her life? Couple of hugs, some sex, some massages, a few love letters here and there, might go a long way.
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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i like cow poo
Nature Lover


Registered: 10/20/09
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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: Spacerific]
#21172836 - 01/24/15 09:43 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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Yeah she does like life better with a boyfriend. Depression runs in the family. Luckily everyone has overcome it but my sister. She's doing better today so that's a good start. I have job searching environmental issues and chores so I don't have an unlimited amount of energy. But I think she'll get better once she learns the hard way to take our advice. I went through something similar at her age. I'm mostly venting.
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i like cow poo
Nature Lover


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Re: Is my sister bipolar? [Re: Spacerific]
#21172843 - 01/24/15 09:45 PM (9 years, 3 months ago) |
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I appreciate everyone's advice!
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Spacerific
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Quote:
Depression runs in the family.
Well there's the genetic thing, that may run in the family, and then there's the fact that depressed people behave in ways that are likely to drain others around them of energy, and/or irritate them to the max. I've seen this switch from feeling awesome to feeling WTF just from having someone with deeper emotional issues around. Most of their energy was wasted by worry worry worry and useless loops in their head, and so whatever nice stuff I did for them, they didn't really have energy to do nice stuff back, just to verbally say thank you. And not in a nice bouncy energetic voice, and no jumping around and no awesome hug, because yeah, energy wasted on worry.
Do you know for a fact that you have the genetic thing, so and so there's this precise gene that makes you all more prone to depression, or do you just like affirming and repeating this "depression runs in the family" stuff, as an excuse to be less active about it?
The genetic part, if you know for a fact you have it (I don't know what kind of DNA testing and stuff you'd have to go through, to be sure) then that yeah, might require medication just to get you to baseline. But if your parents and/or you are just holding it together, then you can for sure expect that any functional healthy person will be annoyed at the little draining ways in which you do things. Depression can "run in the family" for no genetic reason whatsoever, just behavioral stuff, learned bad habits and coping mechanisms.
If you actually care, help her find a new bf.
If the level of your involvement is just verbally telling her, if the only thing you have energy for is some short verbal interaction, then that's PRECISELY the kind of stuff that would get me disappointed and annoyed, to see that in my family. If you care you go above and beyond short observation and saying something. You MAKE the energy (blow other things and people off for a while, to have the energy) to have the resources available to do to more than talk.
When you say everyone in your family dealt with their depression, do you mean they're awesome, energetic, happy and thriving, or (IMO more likely, by the very way you reply to posts) they're just sort of meh, , and there's no actual energy there, depth of emotion and full vibrant life?
-------------------- Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.
For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it. - Matthew 13:16
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