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OfflineGedde570
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Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) * 1
    #21079578 - 01/06/15 08:25 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Hello, everyone. What I am about to tell you is extremely personal, and I hope that you will all respect what I am about to say and take your time to read it, as it might be a little long.

So, let me start off by telling you guys about myself. I am 21 years old, I currently work as a graphic designer, and I am going to move into a new apartment very soon.

When I was younger, I was the healthiest and most vigorous kid in school. Until one day, I felt that sick and exhausted for no apparent reason. This issue grew worse and worse with time, up until the point that my parents decided that it was time for me to go to the hospital and find out what the heck was wrong with me.

I was diagnosed with Limb-girdle muscular dystrophy, as well as a chronic fatigue syndrome (Jackpot, right?). These conditions made it harder and harder for me to do physical activities. This negatively affected my social life, my grades in school, as well as my overall health.

I went into a period of severe depression at the age of 16, staying home from school and declining all of my friend's requests to hang out with them. Someone very, very dear to me tried to commit suicide twice. One time by jumping into the ocean intoxicated (whereas I had to drag them out and call 911) and another time by attempting to overdose on a big amount of strong sleeping pills combined with alcohol.

Three years after that, when I was 19, I lost two of my friends in a car accident. One of them, I had known my entire life. The other since I was 13. I lost two of my grandparents about a year ago. Heck, my point is, I've had a pretty rough upbringing.

So, you might be wondering why the heck I am saying all this here and not to my psychiatrist, so I'll try to get to the point.

I occasionally smoke marijuana to dampen the intense memories of my past. However, I don't consider myself sad or depressed anymore. I don't dwell on it, because I know that there is no point of doing that. Life is too short to focus on the negative things. In fact, I consider myself quite happy.

However, there is one psychological problem I BELIEVE I'm having. And that is anxiety. Every time I smoke marijuana, my heart is racing. It's racing so fast that it is seriously going to explode at any moment. I am having a heart attack. I cannot breathe, I am convinced that I am dying.

Well, not really. I know deep down inside that it is all in my head. So after a while I manage to regain control over my feelings, and thus have a nice and relaxing evening with nothing to worry about. However, where are these initial feelings coming from? There has got to be something buried deep inside my that just somehow "awakens" when I toke one up, because this has never happened to me in a sober state.

Well, what the heck does this have to do with psychedelics? I'll try to get to my point. (Thank you for sticking with me).

I have tried TWO psychedelics in my entire life. One of them is called "Zolpidem". And it is not a recreational drug, it's a type of sleeping medicine. I believe there are many names for it (Ambien, Ambien CR, Intermezzo, Stilnox, etc), so you might have heard of it. It's been many years since I tried it, but I can most definitely remember that going to bed that night was one of the most fascinating experiences of my entire life. So many interesting patterns in my head, colorful and extremely vivid dreams. That's all I can recall from it, but it was fantastic. Not the "high", but the experience itself.

Second is Salvia. I've tried this on multiple occasions. And while I completely lost my mind when smoking it, it didn't feel "trippy". Everything was funny, and somewhat scary. One time I tried it, I could feel something touching me and trying to grab me. I knew that it was in my head, so I took control over the uncomfortable sensation. Remember, this was before I believe I had anxiety.

Now, my best friend and I have talked a LOT about trying a stronger (yet not as intense) type of psychedelic, such as LSD or Mushrooms. And that is exactly why I am here. I have read so much about LSD and mushrooms giving you "an alternate view of reality" and it might completely alter your view on your own existence permanently. Go face to face with the universe. Both the positive aspects, as well as the negative.

Guys, I really, really, want to try this. A spiritual journey to look at the universe from a different perspective. The thing is, the main question; With my current problem(s), is this a good idea?

First off, I know HOW to do it. Set and setting is the most important factor. And I have that covered, two of my closest friends will be there with me, we're free and no one will disturb us.

However, seeing that I am getting panic attacks from weed, is this an extremely bad idea? I am just going to admit it, I am terrified of being stuck in a bad trip, but I know that I somehow have to ignore it. I don't necessarily believe that the trip will go bad, because it most likely will if I have a train of thought like that.

Here's a very short version, as well as my questions summarized.

What do you guys think? Should I steer clear of any type of psychedelic, or do you think that it will be the journey of my life? Is it stupid to take a psychedelic drug with a hard past or when you are suffering from panic attacks when smoking Cannabis? There is little I want to try more than LSD or Magic Mushrooms, but I want to have a good experience. I've read pretty much all there is, I just need to be on the safe side. The trip can be a roller coaster of emotions or a smooth train, and although I am hoping for the latter, I would really appreciate it if you guys would share your opinion with me.

Thanks in advance, everyone. And again, if you're still reading thus far, know that you have my most sincere appreciation.

Edited by Gedde570 (01/06/15 08:31 PM)

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Invisiblewildernessjunkie
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: Gedde570]
    #21079812 - 01/06/15 09:02 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

I would ask why it is that the weed creates the anxiety first.

Is it a physical or psychological reaction? If it creates an unpleasant situation then why do you continue to do it?

Gimme a min. I have mote to say but my phone is dying.

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OfflineLogicaL ChaosM
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: Gedde570]
    #21079905 - 01/06/15 09:15 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

:omgz:

Wow, what an incredibly tragic life story. Im real sorry for you man, no one should go thru all those terrible events in one life :hug:


As for LSD and shrooms, hmmmmm....should u take them?

Its a tough choice. These issues likely will be brought up in your trip, but it might be theraputic. It may bring some closure to you. Or it may be horribly real reliving of these events that could be frighteniing or saddening. Its unknown what u will experience.

In general, here is the differences between LSD and mushrooms on a mental level.

Real LSD taps into your mind, and gets into the inner workings of it. It can be very profound, spiritual and completely immersive. It can also be terrifying if u take too much or dont know how to handle its unprediable nature.

Shrooms can be very introspective and dives deep into your past memories, thoughts, about nature, about life, etc. Some times the intensity of shrooms is relentless and can be too intense for some, but in my experience, it seems more forgiving and easier on the mind in the long run. It all comes down to dosage, potency of the shrooms and how u take it.

If u chose to do shrooms and LSD, START LOW. Like 1-2 grams of cubenis shrooms and 80-100 micrograms of LSD. And it would be good to have a sober siter too if u can. In case things get out of hand.

And remember, set (mind set and mood) and setting (environment and people around) are critical for a good trip. Make sure u are calm, collected, content before tripping and make surre your environment is familiar and safe to u.

Good luck!


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Offlinesearching
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: Gedde570]
    #21079928 - 01/06/15 09:17 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

You sound fine to trip on mushrooms or lsd. Weed CAUSES anxiety period. Your reaction to it is not uncommon at all and doesn't mean you'll have a panic attack while tripping. I have a friend who thinks he's going to die from taking a couple hits, but does fine on psychedelics. Just DO NOT smoke while you're tripping if you have problems with weed. The fact that you pull yourself out of the panic attack and enjoy the rest of the high shows you have the ability to ride things out when it gets difficult. This will be a huge asset for someone who trips. Salvia is one of the most terrifying drugs there are and if you were able to pull it together after a bad experience on that really says a lot.

You'll do just fine. Most people are afraid of having a bad trip the first time. More than likely what will happen is once the trip starts it will be so amazing and new that you won't even understand how someone could have a bad trip.

Salvia and ambien aren't psychedelics in the same way as mushrooms or lsd. Expect something totally different than  those.


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Invisiblewildernessjunkie
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: searching]
    #21080724 - 01/07/15 01:21 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

I'm back. Sorry about the interuption in statement.

Most of the time its a big "no-no" to take any psychedelic with a mental illness. And depression qualifies in that catagory.

With all that said...I cannot comment on Ambien as I've never taken it. Salvia I can comment on though. It is harsh, abrubt, and seems to have a spiritual bias that is prettt narrow. It appeals to few and unpopular for a reason.

Mushrooms IMO and experience are a broad spectrum psychedelic. Every trip I've ever had entailed a spiritual component and some personal insight. Shrooms have a significantly more gentle "come up", and have a tendency to hold your hand during the process.

With all that said, a bad trip is always a possibilty. The possibility is slim though, and is primarily based on set and setting.

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Offlinehidyn
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: wildernessjunkie]
    #21081116 - 01/07/15 05:22 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

I've got am anxiety disorder myself, and had to quit smoking pot because of it... it was way too intense for me. I have to leave the room if my friends smoke it up too much. :frown:

I figure as long as you do it for the right reasons, and treat it like therapy then P. cubensis could work for you.

Because I know what anxiety feels like though, my recommendation is to sit out the first time and be a trip sitter for your friends, and then after that try a very low dose, one that might not even cause you to trip.

If you felt good the whole time and the only thing you were thinking about the whole time is "I want to see and feel what they're seeing and feeling!" Then you can up your dose with confidence!

Others might disagree and say just take a proper dose and hold on, but I have to feel the water with everything I do now, so I still say try a little, and if it doesn't set you off, then try a little more next time!

You gotta go for what you want in life. Good luck, you're not alone!

:peace: :mushroom2: :peace:


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InvisiblePocketLady
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: hidyn]
    #21081328 - 01/07/15 07:55 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Mushrooms and LSD can be amazing medicines and can help you to see things from a completely different perspective. In your post you sound quite rational, and the fact that you mention that even when you do feel anxiety you are able to talk yourself away from it...That says to me that you can probably handle certainly what a low dose of psychedelics can throw at you.

As others have said, weed causes anxiety in LOTS of people. I used to get exactly the same heart-racing effects that you mention. I don't get this with mushrooms or LSD however.

There is always a small risk with psychedelics that things don't go to plan. This can be reduced by paying attention to three things:

- Set: Your mindset going into the trip. Don't trip on a day where you feel particularly bad (although some pretrip anxiety is totally normal and OK)
- Setting: Make sure you are somewhere safe, at home etc and not out in public. Make sure you won't be disturbed and that you don't have to hide your tripping from anyone.
- Dose: Make sure you only take a light to moderate dose for your first time. You can always add more, but you can't take away once you've taken it.

If you plan is properly and treat the substances with respect then there is minimal risk that something will go wrong.


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Love is from the infinite, and will remain until eternity.
The seeker of love escapes the chains of birth and death.
Tomorrow, when resurrection comes,
The heart that is not in love will fail the test.

~ Rumi



The day we start giving Love instead of seeking Love, we will have re-written our whole destiny.
~ Swami Chinmayanada Saraswatir

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Offlinesearching
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: PocketLady]
    #21081620 - 01/07/15 09:31 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

I don't think you have an anxiety disorder, OP. You just have anxiety caused by weed.


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InvisibleThayendanegea
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: searching]
    #21081841 - 01/07/15 10:37 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:

searching said:
I don't think you have an anxiety disorder, OP. You just have anxiety caused by weed.



:whathesaid:
1) stay the fuck away from weed....It has the same effect on me and no change of formulation or types has ever made one bit of difference....I simply cannot smoke weed...took me years of trying to get to that revelation.

2) stay the fuck away from salvia....it has nothing to offer.

3) stay away from ambien...I have not seen one positive come from that shit...and, I have several friends that use it daily....it seems to kind of take their zest for life away.

You will be fine....just take a moderate dose and pay close attention to the "set and setting" guidelines that can be accessed here.:sunny::peace:


--------------------
Look Deep Into Nature,and Then You Will Understand Everything Better.

Albert Einstein

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InvisibleThetriangle
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: Gedde570]
    #21085816 - 01/08/15 04:42 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Just as a counter-point to some other posts, I don't have anxiety problems with marijuana, but with other psychedelics(Shrooms, LSD) I tend to get tons of anxiety.

You never know how each individual reacts to different substances, so my best advice is to take it slow and increase by small amounts next time if you wish to delve further.

It's better to be disappointed with the experience than overwhelmed.

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OfflineUlyssies
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Re: Curious novice desperately needs advice. (Anxiety and psychedelics) [Re: Thetriangle]
    #21086334 - 01/08/15 09:15 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

1. Weed is your friend he'd never hurt you.
2.I was much like you, anxiety and couldn't sleep for days so needed ambien. Ask your doc about trazadone as a replacement. Helps you sleep without the nasty side effects.
3. Fuck Salvia stay away from that shit.
4. I used to have severe anxiety brought about after a traumatic Salvia trip. (I was being strangled to death by evil piano keys). Even a cig or bit of pot would get my heart racing like a sonofabitch. Then one day I tried a high dose of DMT. Had a breakthrough trip and explored a new universe. Since then not one bit of anxiety. Now I can take heroic doses of mescaline, shrooms, and lsd no problem. I can have my world ripped apart, be thrown into the void not remember how to breathe or swallow right and still feel calm within my own mind. Maybe DMT could have a positive psychological effect for you as well?

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