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Anonymous #1

Confused with GP
    #20989729 - 12/17/14 02:32 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

So, I went to my GP a couple of weeks ago with concerns for my weight and anxiety(This took me some time to get the courage to go). I'm very confused and disappointed with how she dealt with it.  She only focused on my anxiety and hardly said anything about my weight. I told her I was given Ritalin when I was 7 and it pretty much fucked my metabolism and my growth. She then replied "okay" and then just started rambling on about my anxiety. I told her I smoke weed which was a big mistake, because she started giving lectures about marijuana can cause paranoia and anxiety and completely ignored the fact I stated I'm anxious because of my weight. Seriously, I have an Hour glass figure, ribs full on show. I'm a walking skeleton. In the end she just referred me to a mental assessor. I wanted to confront her about why she hadn't paid any concern to my weight, but I'm very socially anxious and just left. I'm seeing the assessor on the 31st.

I don't see how this person is going to be any help towards my weight issue. Yeah the anxiety...but my weight? My skin is becoming darker/weird and the bags under my eyes are getting extremely worse(started in high school).

Is this right behaviour for a GP?  Or have I got it wrong and the assessor can help?

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InvisibleDark_Star
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Re: Confused with GP [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #20989868 - 12/17/14 03:03 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

No, your GP should pay attention to what you have to say, and address all of your concerns. Furthermore, from what you've said about your appearance I'm frankly shocked that your GP had nothing to say about it. I'm not an MD, but I am in healthcare, and if I had a patient presenting with your appearance we'd be having a conversation about it, regardless of if you brought it up or not. I'd search around for a second opinion...try to find a different GP; one that will address your concerns.


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OfflineJohnny Depp
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Re: Confused with GP [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #20990025 - 12/17/14 03:39 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

/

Edited by Johnny Depp (12/20/14 03:47 AM)

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Anonymous #1

Re: Confused with GP [Re: Johnny Depp]
    #20990291 - 12/17/14 04:32 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Thank you for your advice, guys. I have pretty bad social anxiety so going to the doctors isn't something I look forward to. I have zero[/] confidence in everything, so being more forceful isn't an option in my mind.  I'm not crazy lol. I have only achieved 5 st in the space of 10 years. (9st now).I'm this, just with a (tad)smaller waist. I've been like it for years and its taking a toll on my mind.



I'm going to talk to the therapist about it anyway, see what he/she has to say. I'll still book another appointment to stop being paranoid about my health. Just wanted to make sure if she done the right thing or not.

Edited by Anonymous (12/17/14 04:35 PM)

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OfflineSpacerific
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Re: Confused with GP [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #20991835 - 12/17/14 09:29 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

OP, thanks for sharing, it's good that you're taking active steps to face your fears and get help outgrowing them.

My question is how does your life work, day to day? What's that time filled with? What do you eat, what do you busy your hands and body with (sports, hobbies, pets, plants etc)? What does your time flow into? I do hope it's not mostly sitting around smoking weed to dispel the anxiety.

I'm asking as your post displays some pretty strange loops, which as far as I know, anyone who's perfectly healthy (body and mind) if they engaged in them for some time, would end up not so healthy.

Quote:

concerns for my weight and anxiety



Concern is a mild form of anxiety. Doesn't it strike you as odd, that you'd go to the doctor with anxiety about anxiety? I mean do you see the unexamined thought loop here? Worries about worries, losing sleep about losing sleep perhaps?

I know some of this becomes habitual if you've been doing it for a while, but there's always at least some choice related to it, whether you do some form of design, or simply give in and start tensing up about it, which actually achieves nothing, as it just freezes things in place.

I've seen a similar anxiety loop about weight. I knew this girl who would every so often take a look at her ass in the mirror, and you could tell she's "concerned" about getting fat. She wasn't fat, but her main involvement in the shape and size of her ass was to every so often look in the mirror and worry (tense up, waste mental energy) about it. Which energy would have done wonders, if redirected into things like squats or sprinting, or exploring the city for more proteins and healthy foods. None of that happened, the main approach was this most ineffective one, of simply tensing up for a few minutes at the prospect of being fat in the future, and then smoking (tobacco or weed) while idling on the couch, to dispel the tension.

I don't know if you feel you're too fat or too skinny, but whichever it is, I'm raising the issue that it's probably helped by things like how much healthy food you take in, as well as how much you exercise, to build a bunch of healthy useful muscle mass.

So that's what I'm asking. What are your strategies to getting from your current body mass, to your desired body mass? Are you moving limbs about it, or just running mental loops about it in your head, and talking about it to various docs and therapists? Where does your energy (the body's electricity) go, regarding this matter? Mostly through the head and mouth, tiring yourself with endless negative imagery, or more actively through the limbs, moving, exploring, getting stronger, getting shit done?

What do you need the balanced body weight for btw? Like what project are you finding your current body weight insufficient for? What are you trying to actually do, and have found you don't have enough muscles or breath for it?


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16

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Anonymous #1

Re: Confused with GP [Re: Spacerific]
    #20993091 - 12/18/14 08:11 AM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:


I don't know if you feel you're too fat or too skinny, but whichever it is, I'm raising the issue that it's probably helped by things like how much healthy food you take in, as well as how much you exercise, to build a bunch of healthy useful muscle mass.

So that's what I'm asking. What are your strategies to getting from your current body mass, to your desired body mass? Are you moving limbs about it, or just running mental loops about it in your head, and talking about it to various docs and therapists? Where does your energy (the body's electricity) go, regarding this matter? Mostly through the head and mouth, tiring yourself with endless negative imagery, or more actively through the limbs, moving, exploring, getting stronger, getting shit done?

What do you need the balanced body weight for btw? Like what project are you finding your current body weight insufficient for? What are you trying to actually do, and have found you don't have enough muscles or breath for it?




There is no doubt I don't eat healthy. When I was a kid I had no idea what Ritalin was until a couple of years ago  I researched and found out the shit stunts growth and causes weight loss, which in my case was severe. They took me off it at some point and gave me another drug concerta (with no side effects) I have no idea why they couldn't have given me that drug instead...It appears I haven't been able to regain what I lost on Ritalin. I've done the math and  I was shocked to know up until the age of 19 I was consuming no more than 1000 calories. Now I eat up to 1500, with struggle, though. I have zero stomach fat, little arm and leg fat. I definitely have no body reserves. I do a little exercise, but I  don't do it for long because I don't want to burn the calories I need. I know how to gain weight healthy, but I am struggling because I get full very easily, even if I am starving. My body is used to the fact I had been eating little amounts for a long period of time.

I'm not to sure what you mean with anxiety loops. I went to the doctor mainly because of my weight, which has caused anxiety, but she focused on the anxiety and the weed. I'm definitely going to see a different person next time. Being skinny like this has pulled me back from doing things in life for too long that my mind simple can't carry on until I solve the issue. I do fixate over it, if that is what you mean with anxiety loops? I have a lot of free time so I do, but the problem is not over exaggerated. I'll take a picture later if that would be helpful?


I do smoke weed everyday. It certainly helps with eating more and helps with the anxiety, but can also make it worse for a couple of days. I don't have too many friends so I find myself smoking more than I should for entertainment, though, this is bad I understand. So its a love/hate thing.

I was really expecting her to refer me to a nutritionist, or something like that. Or maybe she thinks the reason why I'm having weight issues is psychological, hence why she only referred me to get assessed

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OfflineSpacerific
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Re: Confused with GP [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #20994080 - 12/18/14 01:11 PM (9 years, 4 months ago)

Quote:


I'm not to sure what you mean with anxiety loops. I went to the doctor mainly because of my weight, which has caused anxiety, but she focused on the anxiety and the weed.



IMO she's way way off, don't even bother with her, at least not on this topic. You tried, it was a good start, but didn't work out, don't dwell on it.

Quote:


I'm definitely going to see a different person next time.



Personally I don't think you need to see a different person necessarily, I'm quite convinced you can fix this by yourself. The theory of it isn't that difficult, so if you actually start putting more attention on the right questions, I have full confidence you'll bounce right back.

But by all means follow your own instincts, if you have another doc in mind and you feel good about seeing them, go for it :thumbup:

Quote:

Being skinny like this has pulled me back from doing things in life



What things specifically?
Name a few. List them. What required more weight on you and skinny people just can't do it?

Did you try say, climbing, and found that your arms simply lack the muscles to do this, MORE so than the average climbing beginner?

I mean other than Sumo wrestling, I can't think of any skill or sport that's impossible to perform by skinny people. If you don't have a skill in mind in the first place, then IMO that's the problem.

Quote:

that my mind simple can't carry on until I solve the issue.



Well here we're getting places.

What I'm hearing you say is something like "OMG OMG I'm way too thin!"

And my question is, "too thin for what?"

The fact that you're not too clear yet, IMO that is the problem, you're focusing on the wrong question. If you take a specific, clear target, say, gain 20 pounds of muscle or whatever, you'll find that you can work with that. You can do some math, see that it works out to gaining so many pounds per week for so many weeks, and if it's all clear and measured like that, it becomes very much doable.

But as you don't yet have all that now, there's no clear goal, just "too thin" - then that leaves you open for all manner of anxiety about it. You could be heavier that Bruce Lee for instance, and continue to worry and stress about being too thin.

That's why I ask what the project is. And if you have a project, if you discuss it with other people who did the same thing, it will help you realize that it takes time, progress is slow and that is normal, even for perfectly healthy people. Bodybuilders know this, all athletes know this, it takes time for your body to adapt to performing the skill, whatever it is.

Quote:

I do fixate over it, if that is what you mean with anxiety loops?



Yes, that's what I mean. Focusing on how you look, instead of focusing on what you'd like to do.

I challenge you to try to jump, swim, shoot bows and arrows, raise kites, balance on a slackline, you'll find you can do all that, your body isn't weaker than an average beginner in any of those skills. And as you practice the skill, your body WILL get stronger, leaner, more powerful, in response to the activity you put it through. From worrying and smoking weed on the couch it won't get stronger, bigger, fitter, anything. You have to point it at something first.

Start giving yourself clear targets. Lift this much (in numbers) or run this fast during a sprint. Measure yourself now to know the starting point, see where your target is, do a little research to figure out how many weeks/months it takes the average Joe to get there, and IMO you'll have no problems making that kind of progress. But have the numbers, know what you're shooting for, or you will stay in this generic anxiety over vague "too thin" ideas.

Quote:

I have a lot of free time so I do



Are you spending that free time alone indoors?

If so, IMO you don't need to check with any more doctors. I'm perfectly healthy (well some people on this forum won't exactly agree, but let's say I feel generally quite good with myself :lol: ) and if I spend enough time alone indoors, I get into more and more anxiety. This is not a medical problem, it's not a disease or condition or dysfunction. It's is perfectly normal. There's nothing a doctor can do for you, as your system works just fine. EVERYBODY gets more anxious, with enough unstructured time indoors alone.

It's simply the signal to get out more, socialize, form bonds, hang out with other people. It's something we evolved and serves a purpose. Back in the stone age, the more we spent time alone away from tribe and community, the more we were easy picking for predators, enemies, anything. So people who had this healthy anxiety and naturally sought the company of others, made more efforts to form strong tribal ties, spend time together, etc. People had their back, because they were there, helping, cooperating, socializing. Badasses who were chill for months and years alone, didn't get to spread those genes much :shrug:

Quote:

I'll take a picture later if that would be helpful?




No, it wouldn't. The problem, the actual source of your anxiety, is how you focus on your reality, not how much fat and muscle you have on your bones. I grow fatter and thinner all the time, I don't give two shits about it. I know that if I want to get more fit, it'll cost me this much exercise and eating/sleeping right, I'll have to eat this much protein. If I don't feel like doing it or I can't afford the food to do it, I know I'll get more fat for a while, or lose some muscle, that's fine, I'll get back in shape later :shrug:

At no point does endless worry and anxiety need to be put on it. Design is what needs to happen here, not worry.

How much do you weigh now?
How much would you like to weigh, if you even have a target weight? (I don't)
WHY DO YOU NEED THAT TARGET WEIGHT? <- - -  this is IMO by far the most important aspect.

For your current activities, hanging out with not too many friends, smoking weed, whatever else it is that you do, sounds to me like your body weight works just fine.

If you can't tell me things like, I need to be 20 kilos heavier to swim/climb/run/throw spears better, then you're just worrying over nothing. Stop focusing on the weight, start focusing on what you want to do, and post here what it is. What is the activity that you want to perform, and you can't right now because you're allegedly too light?


--------------------
Blessed are your eyes because they see, and your ears because they hear.



For truly, I say to you, many prophets and righteous people longed to see what you see, and did not see it,
and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.
- Matthew 13:16

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