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Amazon Shop: Pink Floyd

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OfflineGrav
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Registered: 02/06/02
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regurgitation
    #2098534 - 11/12/03 08:52 PM (14 years, 14 days ago)

i only feel motivated when i'm in a state of emptiness or depression..like its where im supposed to be.  like otherwise i'm not being honest with myself.
i dont know how to be consistently happy.  i dont feel like i want to even try to be.  i dont want to be content in this bullshit.  im in my own hole i've dug for myself over the last several years.
i've been running as fast as i can from reality.  it makes me sick to my stomach remembering how I used to think about things.  lost in some tripped out dreamstate.  so lost...

i dont need no arms around me
i dont need no drugs to calm me

i just want to float through the next 5 or 6 months and not think about anything.  all i care about right now is excelling in school and bringing out my full potential. i want to work hard and accomplish something and get where I feel I'm supposed to be, cuz it definately isnt here.

if i try and make sense out of any of this bullshit, it only brings more confusion.

and I am also done trying to make sense out of people and my relationships with them.  im just saying fuck it all. let the chips fall where they will. (whatever the fuck that means) ...  i really have zero urge to be accepted by anyone, which is relieving.

i have my family which i love dearly, i have my brothers, and i will always be searching for my soulmate, whenever she decides to step into my life.    until then i will brave this fuckin void, stay focused, stay off drugs, and keep listening to type-O...

there i feel better

thanks for reading :smile:


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Invisiblevampirism
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Re: regurgitation [Re: Grav]
    #2098571 - 11/12/03 08:58 PM (14 years, 14 days ago)

hey,
the pink floyd quote is from a song where Pink is supposed
to be burnt out and in denial- part of the general psyche
cycle.

"don't need no"
is sort of self denial with a hint of a freudian slip-
he really does need someone to hold him, tell him its all right..
some drugs to calm him down.

just my two cents.. hope it goes better (whatever that means-
choose the direction)


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Re: regurgitation [Re: ]
    #2098621 - 11/12/03 09:09 PM (14 years, 14 days ago)

i dont want pacification


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Invisiblevampirism
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Re: regurgitation [Re: Grav]
    #2098625 - 11/12/03 09:09 PM (14 years, 14 days ago)

its not pacification
its just calming down a bit

take a breath and step outside
already outside?
step inside and have a look


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Re: regurgitation [Re: ]
    #2098660 - 11/12/03 09:18 PM (14 years, 13 days ago)

i'll be calm soon enough
i like going with this rather intense life-affirming energy while it lasts


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Anonymous #1

Re: regurgitation [Re: Grav]
    #2098673 - 11/12/03 09:20 PM (14 years, 13 days ago)

everyone always runs from the void

i "like" the void


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Re: regurgitation [Re: ]
    #2098779 - 11/12/03 09:45 PM (14 years, 13 days ago)

the void is a beauty not meant for my fragile human mind.


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Anonymous #1

Re: regurgitation [Re: Grav]
    #2098786 - 11/12/03 09:46 PM (14 years, 13 days ago)

it wouldn't be called the void if our minds weren't fragile


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Amazon Shop: Pink Floyd

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