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Invisibletak
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she
    #2090461 - 11/10/03 09:27 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Ok. Not another post ahh!!! ;]

Lets start from the beginning.

I recently moved back to Florida, where I met some people. Some of them were cool, others were psycho, some sweet, some sour, etc, etc. I started talking to a few of them online, but it got fucking stupid. Some of them were cool to talk to, but acted like the spawn of the television generation.

...Then one girl actually talked to me, and she had more to say than the rest of the crowd. She not only had an opinion, but what seems like an education to back it up. She would talk, and listen. Cool.

I hung out with her, and her boyfriend, and others when I could, but it is hard because my work schedule doesn't always comply. Oh well, we continue to talk on a regular basis, its nice having someone to share the insane ideas in your head with :laugh:~

Then one day I was talking to this girl who was hitting on me i guess, but acting like a complete...Hoe, Fake, Idiot, Egotistical Shit, I dunno. I guess she is a good person, but not my style, so I told her that. "What you are doing isnt working." She then asked "Then what do you want me to do?"

:blush: Thats when it all became more than clear to me. I said "You should be more like xxx" (xxx being this girl i first mentioned). Needless to say, she got mad and hung up the phone.

Who cares.

I just relized that this girl is not only fun to be around, but pretty unique in every way, and I guess I have completely fallen for her, and I didn't even notice. Maybe I didn't notice it because it wasnt lust, I have found a new best friend that I can have the best times of my life with.

She has a boyfriend though. Doesn't matter. I have good intentions, and I'm not trying to cause any harm to anyone. If I was nothing more than a a fading star in all her infinite space, I would be happy. I may have felt this way, but all in all, she was a good friend, and I don't think I can ask for more. I just want everyone to be happy.

Next day.

She broke up with her boyfriend. She was really really sad, and it killed me. I am usually pretty good at reading people, and relating to situations, and providing comforting words, but this time I was stuck. I have never had a bad break up, and I know that no matter what I say or do, she will still be sad.

I tried changing the subject, making jokes, talking to her about it. Everything I did felt like it was contributing to the pain. I dunno wtf to do. I will just keep trying to project my happy energy in her direction, and try to keep myself up. Its pretty easy to get depressed when others are too.

Then I did.

A couple more friends of mine broke up, and everyone was sad. It made me relize how sad and lonely I was. It sucked.

Next day I took off of work to visit this lovely lady, because she needed a friend. We hung out for a good while, it was real fun, and I was soo happy.

I felt so bad being happy after something that bad has happend to a friend of mine.

Next thing I know, and its the weekend. We made plans to rollerblade to the beach, and sleep under the stars durring the eclipse. I got off work at about 4.30 on saturday, and expected some kind of excuse, or if not something on my end, or just something horrible to go wrong. Nothing good ever happens to me!

So I get my moms car wich means i dont have to rollerblade 10 miles! and go to pick her up.

We layed under the stars for a good portion of the night, and i dunno...we slowly started getting closer, and by the end of the night we were cuddling and what not. It felt really good to be able to just hold someone in my arms, and fall asleep with them. I felt like the happiest person alive. I woke up to the sunrising over the ocean, with the most beautiful girl imaginable laying right next to me. Bliss.

The next day, we went our ways for about an hour and showered and what not. Then I went back to her house, and we caught up on some sleep that we missed the night before, and watched movies. The whole time we were pretty close, and again it felt like the best thing in the world.

Monday is the shittiest day ever. I had to work, and that was like going from heaven to hell. =[

Now I am worried. I remember her asking me once "Why do guys get so attached?" ;[ Now im getting pretty attached, and scared. I do not want to get hurt, and I don't want to in any way hurt her.

I hope I am not just a rebound thing here to ease her pain. I can take the pain though. It may break my heart, but it would all be worth if she felt better in the least, ya know. I guess.

I am just worried, im not trying to say I don't trust her, because right now I feel as though I can trust her with anything. I just feel as though she is in a pretty jumbled emotional state, and although everything seems so perfect, I dont want to mess anything up, ever.

My brain is battling with my heart, and my heart is winning :] My brain completely agrees with the heart, but is saying "just be careful, i am gonna get hurt if you are wrong."  I need to stop thinking, and just let the love flow i guess. I just feel like i got a glimpse of heaven, and i dont want to let it go. ya know? ;]


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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Anonymous #1

Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2090725 - 11/10/03 11:10 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

fuck her. its going to end up badly no matter what, but when it does end, at least you got it.


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Offlinesykobish
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Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2090758 - 11/10/03 11:21 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

First off, i'd like to say that i've very glad to hear that you are happy.  It's a great feeling when you find someone that you can be yourself around and not have to fear them using that against you.

I would suggest just playing it by ear.  If she has come around that quick after being so upset, there's a possibility that she is on the rebound.  But then again, maybe not.  Just protect yourself and spend time with her since you like to do so, but try not to get too attached too fast until you know what's going on.  I know it's hard to do so, but i'd hate to see you get hurt.  Who knows.  Her feelings that she seems to be expressing towards you may be true and this could turn into a great thing.  Just take it day by day and see how things go.  Don't push her.  If it's meant to be, it'll happen and things could be amazing.  If it's not meant to be, then at least you have shared some incredible moments together and you still have a great friend out of it.  Best wishes to you. :heart:


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I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
Global Living Space


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Offlinesykobish
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Re: she [Re: ]
    #2090759 - 11/10/03 11:23 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Quote:

LoOnEr said:
fuck her. its going to end up badly no matter what, but when it does end, at least you got it. 




:frown: That's not true.  You can't predict what the future holds.. Some people care about other things, not just sex.


--------------------
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
Global Living Space


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Anonymous #1

Re: she [Re: sykobish]
    #2090795 - 11/10/03 11:38 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

That's not true. You can't predict what the future holds.. Some people care about other things, not just sex.

very true. i've been in his EXACT same position... i didn't even want to think about sex with her because i was "in love with her" but what do i regret from the situation? that it ended before i could fuck her.

i believe girls coming off a relationship are not looking for love. most of them are looking for a cushion in dealing with break-up and/or sex.


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Offlinesykobish
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Re: she [Re: ]
    #2090827 - 11/10/03 11:54 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

I'm sorry to hear that it didn't work out for you. :frown:

I agree that some girls do that exact thing.  But just cuz it happened once to you, doesn't mean that we are all like that.  After my most recent ex over a year ago, i still haven't dated, or had rebounds with anyone.  I guess the way you respond to things, how you act under certain circumstances, all depends on your state of mind and your maturity level at the time.


--------------------
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
Global Living Space


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Invisibletak
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Re: she [Re: sykobish]
    #2091476 - 11/11/03 05:51 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Drama sucks.

Last night some dood was honking on the freeway, and my mom said "Chill the fuck out. Some people need to just kick back and relax, it's aaaalllll good." and i was like.... "yyeaaahhh"

wakakakkaka

HaEHaEHaHehaheHahehaehAEHhae ;'[


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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Offlinesykobish
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Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2091497 - 11/11/03 06:10 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Sure.


--------------------
I would rather have had one breath of her hair, one kiss from her mouth, one touch of her hand, than eternity without it. One.
-={Nite-Crew}=-

*-_Thread_Jacker_-*
To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind. - Th?ophile Gautier.
Seek not every quality in one individual - Confucius.
Global Living Space


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InvisibleRipple
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Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2091753 - 11/11/03 10:28 AM (13 years, 1 month ago)

All I can say is good luck and I hope it all works out well, like in the movies.


--------------------
The bus came by and I got on that's when it all began!



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Invisibletak
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Re: she [Re: Ripple]
    #2098447 - 11/12/03 08:26 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

She is one of the coolest people ever, and it hurts me soo bad to see one of my friends hurt. she is going through some tough times right now with her ex, and long time friends of hers. I try to be comforting, but i really cant. I dont know what she is going through, no matter how hard i try to understand, im still completely fucking clueless. it depresses me soo much to see people sad.


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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InvisibleDelyrium
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Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2098655 - 11/12/03 09:17 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

be careful. this sounds like my friend and i. he was my BEST BEST BEST friend. i loved him so much - he was there for me when i was at my lowest and always managed to put a smile on my face. we would get very close together. we'd cuddle and i'd just curl up and lay next to him. he was comfortable - he was trustworthy - i felt that when i was with him... nothing could go wrong. but it was just a friendship.

that's when he opened his mouth and started talking about how he felt for me. it freaked me out. i was too close to him for that kind of change. it was odd. we tried it but after 1 kiss, i kinda freaked and couldn't continue. it wasn't the same after that... he now has a girlfriend who he deserves however we haven't seen each other for 2 months. i saw him about a week ago and we just hugged, and stayed like that for what seemed to be eternity. i still love him, and i still feel comfortable when we hold each other... but it just couldn't go past that.

so like i said... be careful.


--------------------
Fuck Ted Nugent he?s a fucking jerk
I wish that he?d be gone
Chauvanistic republican
Kills animals cause he
Forgot how to write a song


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Anonymous #1

Re: she [Re: Delyrium]
    #2098661 - 11/12/03 09:19 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

...


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Invisibletak
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Re: she *DELETED* [Re: ]
    #2098715 - 11/12/03 09:32 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

Post deleted by root-ninja-tak


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


Edited by root-ninja-tak (11/12/03 10:19 PM)


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Anonymous #1

Re: she [Re: tak]
    #2098722 - 11/12/03 09:33 PM (13 years, 1 month ago)

you are going to lose her if your not aggressive, that is a fact. go for her undies.


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Invisibletak
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Re: she [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #6032560 - 09/05/06 08:38 PM (10 years, 3 months ago)

Sorry to bring up the dead. But I was reading my post history and thought I might share.

We've been together almost 3 years now ;]


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.


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