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It was the worst one ever. Should have stayed home.
To start it off, two friends and I split a litre of Tito's Handmade Vodka - which if you have never had it, is great stuff. That part was good. I love that Vodka, it is my drink from now on.
Then we went to Baker Street where I found out today that my credit card was run twice for the exact same purchase which I have to get cleared up. It wouldn't be so bad except it was a sixty dollar purchase. Then while me and my two friends were in there people kept telling me my costume sucked - I was a smurf in a car wreck. I was painted all blue and I had fake cuts and metal pieces sticking out of the head. The Halloween store was running out of stuff when I got there...
Anyway then we went to the Bronx Bar and I went up to the bar to get a drink and these two guys were drinking up at the bar and wouldn't let me get by to order a drink. Finally I try to squeeze in and one of them shoves me backwards. I just shrugged it off and went back up to the bar kind of grinning like maybe it was a joke. Then the guy goes "next time ask me if you want to get by and don't try to push your way in" and I said "Yes your highness" and then he said "what did you say?" and I said "Yes overlord master of rice village, I am sorry for my insolence" and then he punched me, as I turned, and it caught the side of my head.
At this point, my two friends jump in. I don't think these idiots knew I had any friends there because my friends are 6'6'' and 6'3'' and around 300 pounds each. I am a much more easy to pick on 5'9'' 170. So after my friends get ahold of these guys all the bouncers break it up and they throw us out because we looked like we must have started it because my friends could have eaten these two for lunch. I was the only one who got punched and I didn't get to retaliate. I could have but I didn't want to be the idiot who starts punching people when his friends are already scaring them ****less.
Next we go over to Little Woodrows where we are enjoying a game of Golden Tee sipping some Miller Lights when this dude comes out of the pisser really wasted and starts talking to us. He is really drunk. He is in a frat and his friends are at a table on the porch. At first he seems cool. Then his frat brother comes over and asks him if everything is alright and I tell him "yeah of course it is" and he says "I wasn't asking you little ****" which made one of my friends ask him "were you asking me little ****?" and he started trying to talk his way out of it with Big Eric. Then the guy who originally came out of the pisser and started talking to us friendly then started to tell me to leave his friend alone, who I hadn't said a word to. Then he starts getting in my face and he is so drunk he is stumbling into me and bumping heads with me. So finally I push him off, not to hard at all, and his frat brothers all want to get into it. Again we get kicked out, no real fight just alot of talking as we leave and they get to stay.
Then on the way home Big Eric gets pulled over in his Denali and gets a DWI. Me and Chris had to call a cab to go from Gessner to Tomball at 3:00 AM where I had to sleep in Eric's back yard because that was where I was going to stay that night. At least I was better off than poor Eric.
Anyway, I hope ya'll had a better time. I got a shiner now for work too. I'll have to go with the old tripped and hit a door knob story again.
-------------------- The above post is entirely fictional and should not be taken out of context.
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