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Offlinematteo
empty

Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Trip Report: Hellish trip... confused.
    #1981089 - 10/05/03 01:13 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I had a horrific trip yesterday, only thirty grams of fresh p.cubes but easily a level five. I wont describe it all because it would take far too long for right now, but basically although the trip started out nice, while listening to pink floyd i felt evil spirits playing with me, offering me darkness and i chose to revel in it for a moment. While that was in my head there was no escape, suddenly al (the guy tripping next to me) seemed to be imperceptible, he was away and grinning in nirvana while i struggled with my demons.

As the trip proceeded i saw al melt beside me into a pile of elbows and chins, he wasnt talking just blithering incomprehensibly, i couldnt communicate with him and soon began to wonder whether he actually existed. Suddenly i felt the world was ending, that everyone was ascending to a higher plane except me who was stuck with pain and torment, time looped and i forgot how to be human, forgot who I was and what it was to be me. I constantly worried about something being missing, i checked the time constantly wishing it was over and while time did seem to be passing i could never remember what the time had been the last time i checked it so i couldnt guage how much had passed.

I heard chainsaws and other evil devices outside, saw horrific images of skulls, death and decay, i panicked that i had lost my mind, destroyed it with a drug and could never return to normal. I believed for a while that i was not breathing, i thought i was just dreaming and would wake up and find out my whole life had been a joke, i felt like i had been in hell forever and that my life was some cosmic joke to taunt me with pleasant things. I felt rejected, i couldnt understand anything, any concepts. It was awful.

After a few hours of suffering i finally emerged very glad to be back in reality but terrified. Should i ever trip again? should i be worried for my sanity? will this affect me in the long term? i feel scarred.. The world seems different, bigger, more frightening. I really beat myself up during the trip as well, saw my personality from every perspective and analyzed it and pummeled myself for my bad points... What message do i take from this? I need guidance.


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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OfflineSombie
Moonrock eater

Registered: 12/07/02
Posts: 2,643
Loc: Stafford, Virginia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981100 - 10/05/03 01:17 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

you took to much man, to much.


--------------------
"America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable." - Hunter S Thompson

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Offlinematteo
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Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: Sombie]
    #1981116 - 10/05/03 01:23 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

only thirty grams fresh man, i've done that much before.


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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OfflineSombie
Moonrock eater

Registered: 12/07/02
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Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981120 - 10/05/03 01:25 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Muchrooms vary in potency, these could have been more powerful.


were they grown or picked?


--------------------
"America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable." - Hunter S Thompson

Check out Agio

Follow my NFL Blog


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Offlinematteo
empty

Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: Sombie]
    #1981125 - 10/05/03 01:27 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

grown indoors by a shop, they sell them here in london. do you think it will affect me negatively, and permanently?


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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Anonymous

Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981131 - 10/05/03 01:36 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

probably not permanently.


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Offlinematteo
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Registered: 09/14/03
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Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: ]
    #1981137 - 10/05/03 01:38 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

probably??


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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Offlinedjurg
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Registered: 03/12/02
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Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981147 - 10/05/03 01:46 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Well I did 5 grams of some real strong shroom about a month ago and I sure can tell you that I suffer from lost of memory since then.

I really cant remember lot of thing now.

Be carefull in your future experience.

I used to say that, Theres no such things as too much drug,but believe me thats not true


--------------------
Did God created humans or humans created God ?
Only God knows
So no one knows
Cause there's no God.


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Offlinest0nedphucker
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Registered: 04/17/03
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Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981149 - 10/05/03 01:47 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I have had similar experiences but I dont view them as bad, merely another type of experience.
If you are still concerned with the aspects of your personality you were "bashing" then perhaps you should draw from the experience and change the things about yourself that you are not happy with.
Perhaps you should also do more to prepare yourself before hand, "bad trips" are always a possibility you should be fully aware of this before you decide to visit the psychedelic amusement park


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The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is to live under the government of worse men.


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Invisiblebandaid
clever title

Registered: 05/14/03
Posts: 340
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981152 - 10/05/03 01:48 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

bah you'll be fine, everytime I take shrooms after the peek I feel beyond horrible, I mean.. really.. really.. horrible, horrible is just a word.. its a mental kind of pain that feels increadibly painfull, too hard to describe, only what a shroom can bring, its trully horrible.. ok i'll shut up already

anyhow, you should be fine, unless your naturaly gene deficient to shrooms and have a weakness to it, most of my trips end up hellish, but I come out of it just fine once its all over, maybe a little traumatized but still OK :smirk:


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Offlinematteo
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Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: bandaid]
    #1981174 - 10/05/03 01:58 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

phew... its just hard to accept having been through such horror, i dont want to forget it because it seems cautionary and i realized alot of things about myself... forgot alot of them but a few stuck with me.


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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Offlinematteo
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Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981179 - 10/05/03 01:59 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

st0nedphucker- i did prepare for a bad trip, i had affirmations to say and breathing excersises to do if i got caught in loops, but i forgot them all in the midst of it, they seemed like ghostly mocking keys to the exit in my mind and i could recall them straight.


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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Offlinest0nedphucker
Rogue State
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Registered: 04/17/03
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Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981199 - 10/05/03 02:05 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Excellent, I get dodgy trips all the time I actually find them quite enjoyable....
Well I just dosed now roughly 2g dry P. Semilanceta hoping for a nice warm trip.
Peace


--------------------
The punishment which the wise suffer, who refuse to take part in government, is to live under the government of worse men.


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Invisiblesimplemachine
Manfly
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Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 1,981
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981210 - 10/05/03 02:12 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Was that yer first time or what?

Jeez mang you guys gotta learn how to enjoy this shit! Seein my buddy melt into a pile of chins and eybrows is my idea of a good time! I guess it ain't for everybody. Next time don't eat soo much, and use a sitter or something if that will help you.


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Offlinematteo
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Registered: 09/14/03
Posts: 69
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: simplemachine]
    #1981311 - 10/05/03 02:55 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

was my fourth trip. Second thirty gram trip, all other trips have been enjoyable and fun. Is this just the way mushrooms really are or...?


--------------------
I have presented the above as fact, but it is only based on one of an infinite number of possible theories, each of which is as true as the other is false.


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Invisiblebandaid
clever title

Registered: 05/14/03
Posts: 340
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: matteo]
    #1981599 - 10/05/03 04:59 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

What do you mean by really are?, you mean its normal effects?, I dont think ppl would take it if most of the time if you got a horrible trip everytime. Ive had good trips and bad trips on the same shrooms. Alot of it depends on setup, ie; your bodily function, how much food you ate before, how long did you not eat before you dosed, the kind of food, your environment such as music, video (whatever ur watchin), house temperature, your going-in-mood the second your dose. I dont think there is a SET normal experience, for me atleast they can differ alot each time and like I said on the SAME shrooms.


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OfflineTantalus
Beyonddescription.
Registered: 06/05/03
Posts: 747
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: bandaid]
    #1981626 - 10/05/03 05:09 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

I know it's hard to do, but try to look at this trip as a learning experience. Think how much you'd grow as a person if you took what you learned about yourself and worked with it.

As long as you space your trips out appropriately, they won't have any permanent negative effects on you unless you let them.

Btw, I think the to much comment was just an attempt to be funny & quote fear & loathing.


--------------------
"A nation's hope of lasting peace cannot be firmly based upon any race in armaments but rather upon just relations and honest understanding with all other nations...

Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed... The cost of one modern heavy bomber is this: a modern brick school in more than 30 cities. We pay for a single fighter with a half million bushels of wheat. We pay for a single destroyer with new homes that could have housed more than 8,000 people..."

President Dwight Eisenhower, 1953


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OfflineSolitude
protector of theKitab Al-Alzif
Registered: 09/02/03
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Last seen: 13 years, 2 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: Tantalus]
    #1981976 - 10/05/03 08:11 PM (13 years, 3 months ago)

HAHAHA the demon flies in the bottom-less depths of hell
because of experiences like that is why i am what i am now. i can guarantee one everytime, i revel in it always, and feel quite at home now. its great, SATAN!!! if u cabt hendle it jus remind urself "im trippin on shrooms" my friends get shit like that and that seems to help us out.


--------------------
More lucid now the dreams become in which the forest dark and cold await me to engulf my soul within the flames of eternal sleep.

"I await this day with no fear ,but the knowlege that that most rewarding and enlightening experiance of life is death." - Chinacat


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Invisibletruekimbo2
Cya later, friends.
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Registered: 12/08/02
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Loc: ny
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: Solitude]
    #1982527 - 10/06/03 12:00 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

sure doesn't sound like a level 5, sounds like you just have some things to work out in your head.


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You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.


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OfflineSombie
Moonrock eater

Registered: 12/07/02
Posts: 2,643
Loc: Stafford, Virginia
Last seen: 6 years, 10 months
Re: Hellish trip... confused. [Re: Tantalus]
    #1982767 - 10/06/03 01:28 AM (13 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Tantalus said:


Btw, I think the to much comment was just an attempt to be funny & quote fear & loathing.





I'm glad someone got that.


--------------------
"America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable." - Hunter S Thompson

Check out Agio

Follow my NFL Blog


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Amazon Shop for: Pink Floyd

Mushrooms, Mycology and Psychedelics >> The Psychedelic Experience >> Trip Reports

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